If I were in your shoes
by everlark-king
Summary: This is a Hunger Games AU. What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? " But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! " " Oh yeah, I know him. I do. He totally would. " She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.
1. Chapter 1 : Why am I still alive?

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter one : Why am I still alive?**

Peeta was running, slowed down by his fake leg. He just killed Brutus and was now trying to find a way to get to Katniss. He heard his name screamed by her, revolving in the arena. So he ran, he ran as fast as his body allowed him, going towards the origin of the sound. Probably, heading towards the tree wasn't a good idea, as in a few moments, the thunder would hit it. He knew he shouldn't be going there, but he really didn't give a shit. All he wanted was to save Katniss, for her to win this Quarter Quell and go back to District 12.

He was out of breath, chocking, but he just couldn't stop running. It was unthinkable, the girl he loved was yelling his name, again and again in a strangled voice. This was not a time to be weak, he had to find her, really fast. He heard another scream from Katniss, but she wasn't screaming his name anymore.

Thunder hit the tree and Peeta could see a lightened line fly through the sky. What in hell? Then, in front of his shocked eyes, the line touched what seemed to be the arena's ceiling, sending a wave of light thought the whole dome. A big hole appeared, bad news. Peeta stared at the small piece of sky that peeked through the opening, at this white moon that was looking back at him. He shook his head, now was not the time. The Capitol had probably sent hovercrafts full of peacemakers, to kill every single survivor. Plus, the arena could fall anytime soon.

Peeta ran again, now jogging through the jungle, towards the big tree, overwhelmed by the turn of events. It had obviously been one of Katniss' arrows that flew and broke the ceiling. Why did she do that? Why? Snow saw it, and she was definitely about to die.

He saw Beetee, convulsing on the ground, but no sign of Katniss. Where did she go?

" Katniss! Katniss! Where are you?! Pease answer me! " He screamed on the top of his lungs

No one answered, except dead silence and birds tweeting. He felt the tide of despair running through his whole mind and body. He was sure that Katniss shot that arrow and destroyed the arena. But then where was she? What about Finnick and Johanna? One part of the dome fell, but it was nowhere close from his location, so he kept looking for her.

" Katniss! Katniss it's Peeta! Katniss please ! " He yelled, running.

He was feeling upset about himself, failing at protecting the girl he loved, and he felt this anger, this angst spread in his veins. He was panting hard, then a rock hit the back of his head. He put a hand to the injured area, a scream escaping his mouth. He had his sword out and ready, but Johanna was already sitting on his belly, an ax on the delicate skin of his throat.

" So lover boy, where is she? The girl on fire? " Johanna said, smirking.

" I have no idea! You'll never find her! " Peeta screamed, glaring at her.

" So sad you lost her on your way… Ha, ha! Shut up now. " She answered, laughing like crazy.

She pulled a knife out of her belt, smaller and sharper than the one under his throat, and cut Peeta's right forearm. It was slow and painful, so slow… He didn't even try to move Johanna because of the knife under his throat, that could kill him anytime. He tried to remain silent and bit the inside of his cheek. Johanna smiled devilishly.

" Why don't you just kill me now? " He asked, panting.

" Oh no, no, no! That is not what I want handsome! Not now! " She said, smiling.

She stared at him, and Peeta had no clue what she was thinking about, and just stared back. Suddenly, her lips were on his, as she put pressure on his jaw to make him open his mouth. Then, she kissed him deeply, tasting blood with her tongue. What was happening? The pain in Peeta's arm was still awful. Then, he connected the dots in his head. His tracker! She took off his tracker! Well done, good job there Johanna. She then hit him on his temple, on the perfect spot and he fell unconscious. Johanna was now obviously walking away with his tracker. But to Peeta, everything was dark, he could still hear noises but not open his eyes yet. He didn't know how long it took him to do so, but the only thing that came to his mind was her.

" KATNISS ! " He yelled, desperate.

He still had to save her, to protect her. And maybe shouting her name would bring the other tributes here, leaving her some time to run away and maybe escape the arena. This was all he could do for her anyway.

" Come on Katniss! I'm here! Katniss " He kept screaming.

Then he saw it, the huge hovercraft just above his head. He stared at it, frozen by fear. He was about to die. And Katniss would not live long if they found her. He tried to move, but Johanna's hit enabled him to just stand up. All he could do was pray for Katniss' safety. He hoped she thought of getting rid of her tracker and ran away. But even if she did… Where could she run?

" Well… Here we are. " He sighed, closing his eyes.

He barely felt his body leave the ground. When he opened his eyes again, he was in the hovercraft, with Beetee lying unconscious by his side. The fact alone that he was able to breathe was unbelievable. He noticed a bandage on his right arm and stood up, a big headache pounding on his temple. He whimpered in pain and reached the exit of the room, stumbling. No guards? Wasn't he on an hovercraft? From the Capitol? Why did they even heal him? Why wasn't he dead? he walked in a bright corridor, making him frown, and stopped in front of a tinted glass door. He could hear voices coming from the inside. There was an argue, he guessed, because the people in there were shouting. He got closer silently, and the door slid open.

" I won't say anything! It wasn't my idea after all! " Finnick shouted, a hand in front of him.

" You were okay with th- Peeta?! You're awake? How do you feel? " Plutarch Heavensbee asked, surprised.

The ex game-maker took a step closer to Peeta, steadying a comforting and reassuring hand on his shoulder. But Peeta didn't answer him. His eyes settled on Finnick, that seemed totally broken and torn, then on Haymitch, which seemed sober than usual.

" Where is Katniss? " Peeta asked, his voice trembling.

" Peeta, we wanted to save you both, but we couldn't take the risk t- " Plutarch started.

" Where is she?! " Peeta stopped him.

" We had to save one of you, and she wasn't here when she arrived. " Plutarch continued.

He just ignored the man in front of him, pushing him aside, and walked towards Haymitch. The old man was holding his hands above his head, as if he was about to get arrested, or hit.

" Peeta, this is the revolution, and we wanted to make you both leave the arena. Plutarch and half of the tributes were on it. " Haymitch said, staring at the blond.

So that was the reason the morphling sacrificed herself. The reason why Finnick helped them, why Johanna took his tracker and saved Beetee and Wiress for Katniss. Everything was clear in Peeta's mind now.

" You promised me! You said you'd save her over me! " Peeta screamed, taking a step closer to his ex-mentor.

" That's right… But hum, I promised Katniss the same thing. You were here when we got in the arena, and Katniss' tracker pointed way too far. "

Peeta's eyes widened, then he shot a death glare at Finnick. After all, he was one of the tributes who didn't want him to take the coil with Katniss, he had insisted for them to part.

" Why did you make us… part? " Peeta asked in a low voice.

The other blond didn't answer, and just gave him an apologizing and scared look.

" Where is she Haymitch? " Peeta said, turning towards his mentor again.

" … Peeta. Calm down. "

" Haymitch… Please, answer. "

" Peeta… " Haymitch said, almost begging.

" WHERE IS SHE?! " The boy yelled, jumping on his mentor.

Plutarch took a hold on one of Peeta's arm, trying to unable him to murder Haymitch. The boy shot him a dark glare and turned his attention back on his mentor. This fucking betrayer…

" Where is she?! " He kept asking.

" Johanna took your tracker off. And… "

" Where… is Katniss? " Peeta asked again, his voice trembling from the anger.

Finnick was now facing the wall, a hand on his eyes. Plutarch's hold on Peeta's arm tightened as the boy kept asking the same thing, over and over again, like a possessed, like a madman.

" WHERE IS KATNISS ?! " He shouted, out of breath.

" They got her and Johanna. She's in the Capitol. " Haymitch said, looking down at his feet.

Peeta was petrified, from head to toes. His eyes were wide open, staring at an invisible point. His brain was making him understand that what he feared happened; Katniss was about to die.

" She's in the capitol?! You fucking promised Haymitch! You told me that you'd save her! " He screamed.

" Peeta, listen, I "

" No! Why did you do that?! Did you lose your mind? She's the mockingjay! What were you thinking about when you chose to save me?! " Peeta kept screaming, tears going down his cheeks.

" I didn't! I have no power where we're going! Not even a bit! " Haymitch yelled back.

" In 12? You know the mayor, don't lie! You could have tell him to save Katniss! "

" We are heading to District 13. " Plutarch said.

Peeta flip-flopped, now facing the ex blond boy was looking crazy, totally out of his mind, sweat forming on his forehead.

" What are you saying? " Peeta said, laughing nervously. " We're going to 13?! Does it even exist?! " He made a pause and searched for Haymitch's eyes. " Why not in 12? "

" They sent hovercrafts when Katniss hit the ceiling of the arena with her arrow. They sent firebombs. " Haymitch explained, his head hanging low.

" W… What?! " Peeta squealed, crying his eyes out.

His legs couldn't support him anymore, and the boy had to take a few steps back to regain his balance. His headache came back, making him growl loudly. This stupid bitch Johanna got him good.

" I'm truly sorry Peeta… " Haymitch said.

" But… We could find survivor! There must be some! We have to go to 12! "

" There is no survivor. " Haymitch announced. " Only ruins and burnt bodies. The few that are still alive are in 13 now. "

" What about Katniss' family? Are they alive? Are they okay? " Peeta asked, worried.

" Yes, they're in 13. Gale took all the survivors there, he's a hero. "

Peeta looked at Finnick, that seemed on the edge of breaking in tears. Why was he like that? Did things happen in 4 too?

" What's wrong Finnick? " Peeta asked.

" What's wrong? I don't know what happened to Annie… I just… Don't know anything! " The blond answered, shaking.

" You should rest Peeta. We'll talk about of all this with Coin. " Plutarch said.

" Coin? Who is that? "

" You'll see. " Plutarch answered, calmly.

Peeta nodded, suddenly exhausted, and walked like a ghost back to where he woke up. Beetee hadn't move, not even a little bit. The blond boy sat on a bed, trying to stay calm. Katniss was in the Capitol, mostly being tortured, and there was nothing he could do about that, because they were heading towards the opposite direction. To District 13. He didn't know if his own family survived, but learned that District 12 had been destroyed. None of these information were good to hear. He tried to relax, but his heart beat was way too fast, way too strong, as if the muscle wanted to escape his torso. He lied on the bed and stared at the ceiling, focusing on his breathing. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, again and again.

" Oh Katniss… I am so sorry. " He murmured.

His eyelids felt so heavy… He closed his eyes and tried to send a thought to Katniss. Trying to make her understand that she wasn't alone, even if she desperately was. Trying to tell her that he would do all he could to bring her back.

This was not supposed to happen. He should be dead, or in the Capitol. And Katniss should be the one here, heading to 13 to see her family. She should be here, instead of him. Tears wanted to burst out, but Peeta didn't cry. He focused on what he had to say to this "Coin" when the hovercraft would land in 13.

* * *

**NDA : My first fiction here :)**

**I am rewriting every chapter in the regular way.**

**I'll try posting a chapter twice a month at least on fridays, or at least I'll try (haha)**

**So sorry if my english sucks sometimes, but I'm a french student that's trying her best.**

**Hope you enjoyed it, **

**Thanks for reading me and see you in the next chapter.**

**Bisous. :)**


	2. Chapter 2 : Under the ground

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 2 : Under the ground**

When Peeta stepped out of the hovercraft, he saw nothing but a bunch of ruins and grey sand. Plutarch Heavensbee showed him the direction to follow, towards a corridor. A door was at the end of it, with guards on each side of it. A few meters away, was an elevator. They got inside and the journey to what seemed to be the center of the Earth, lasted a good minute. When he got out of it, he saw a woman, standing straight, with pale skin and hollow eyes. What captured Peeta's attention was her grey, almost silver, hair. They were so thin, so straight, so perfect. Too perfect.

_" So you were able to bring the boy. Great, great. "_ She said, her monotone voice surprising Peeta.

The boy clenched his fists, and had to stop himself from hitting her in her face. He stared at that woman, thinking only about Katniss. She turned away from him and walked in a long, strange and unwelcoming corridor. Plutarch moved his head to make the blond understand that he had to follow her. They ended up in a huge room, surely made for meetings. Everyone sat down except the woman, that smiled and nodded.

_" I am glad to see you here, Mr Mellark. "_ She said, looking down on him.

Peeta didn't know why, but he felt something was different about that woman. A strange aura was coming from her, this impression on superiority and indifference. He didn't trust her already. Maybe was he wrong about it, and he wished he was. But he couldn't know just yet.

_" I am Alma Coin, president of District 13. "_ The woman said, walking._ " We wanted to save you, Mr Mellark, and the girl too. Unfortunately, things didn't go as planned. But we have you, and it is amazing. We'll be able to work it out. "_

Peeta wanted to hit her again. How could that woman say that it was amazing for Katniss not to be in those walls? He clenched his jaw and kept listening to the President's speech.

_" Here in 13, we impose rationing food. We'll have to check your weight and your height to give you the right portions. Everyone older than sixteen, in good health conditions, will become a soldier and have a straight training. You'll receive a schedule every morning, and you'd better do everything it says… Believe me. " _The woman continued, almost mechanically.

She laid her eyes on Peeta. The boy did nothing but stare back at her.

_" About you, Peeta Mellark… " _She started, as the boy kept looking at her. _" We have some business talk to do, revolution stuff, shall we? "_

_" I guess I don't have a choice anyway. " _Peeta bit back.

He could almost picture Haymitch roll his eyes and Plutarch hit his head with his hand. Coin smiled again, and almost everybody left the room. Only Plutarch, Coin and Peeta were still in, with a few guards, ready to protect the president if needed.

_" Is my family here? " _Peeta asked.

_" I don't remember allowing you to talk, Mr Mellark. "_

_" Are they in there? " _

_" No. I'm sorry. " _The woman answered, lightly shaking her head.

She started to walk along the table, looking at the grayish walls around her. Peeta kinda knew his family members wouldn't make it through a Capitol attack, but hearing it was different. He was forced to be aware of the fact that he had no one left. His had, his brothers… Even his mother… All dead. How did he get there? He was supposed to die in the arena and let Katniss come home. Instead, he was in 13 while Katniss was in Snow's hands, and his family was dead.

_" So… We need a spokesman, someone that could give hope to people, to the oppressed. We thought that the girl and you, the star-crossed lovers of District 12, would have been perfect. The fire and the spunk of the girl, and your way with words, combined. Rebels need to know they are not alone in this fight, understood? "_

Peeta didn't answer and glared at Plutarch. The man was cross-armed, nodding, his face wearing a smirk. So Coin wanted them both? To push Panem's uprising. She asked for Plutarch's help for that. But she could only have him, half of the "couple", so now, she was about to take as much as she could from him. Peeta knew it. Asshole was what he wanted to spit to her face. Even more since she didn't seem to be able to call Katniss by her name, but use "girl" instead.

_" Why me? Why not Finnick, Haymitch or even Gale? Why me and not Katniss? "_

_" I asked if you understood what I said. " _Coin said, ignoring Peeta's question.

_" I did. " _the boy sighed.

Coin nodded slightly. She seemed really confident in the way she acted. She knew Peeta had no choice but to obey her every demand if he wanted to save Katniss. And he would do anything he could, because she was the most important person he had, well the only one he had. He thought he would die to let her live, but he failed miserably. He was stuck in District 13, ready to be used to keep people from giving up on their revolution, and kill each other. It was everything but what Peeta would usually do. And Coin was the only person able to find a way to save Katniss, unfortunately.

_" And I had my reasons. I wanted you to be saved as a priority, Peeta. Your mentor tried to change my mind, he tried pretty hard, I have to admit. " _Coin said, looking at the boy. _" He tried to convince me to make both of you escape the arena. Too risky. "_

_" Katniss' life was worth that risk. It still is. " _Peeta groaned.

_" I knew you would say so. "_

Coin kept on walking, smiling strangely as if she was in her own world. She finished the tour of the room and stopped in front of Peeta, her hands crossed in her back. She bent towards him, planting her hollow eyes in Peeta's.

_" But right in the moment, Katniss Everdeen is dead. " _Coin started, a smirk on her face. _" Or worse. "_

_" How dare you?! Saying this as if she meant nothing to anyone! " _Peeta yelled, getting up.

_" Peeta, stay calm! Everything is goi- " _Shouted Plutarch, settling a hand on Peeta's shoulder to make him seat down on his chair.

Peeta didn't care about the man, and yelled, pushing the ex game-maker hand away and walking towards Coin. Two guards jumped on him, handcuffing him as fast as they could.

_" EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT?! WHO ARE YOU KIDDING? WE HAVE TO GET HER BACK! " _The boy screamed on the top of his lungs, his face red.

_" Take him to his room. " _ordered the president, calm.

Peeta screamed again, and the guards took him out of the room. The boy was able to see Coin's smile, vicious and satisfied just before the doors locked in front of his eyes. He felt a needle in his arms and everything went black.

He woke up from a nightmare - where Katniss was screaming his name, locked on a torture table - shouting and sweating. He had to take big breaths to calm his crazy beating heart. He took a look at the place he was in. A random bedroom, with a bed, a nightstand , a desk with its chair and a little cupboard. He froze when he realized the color of the walls, of the ceiling. Dark green, like a forest. Katniss… The boy remembered when Katniss told him about her favorite color, in the train on their way to the Capitol. Oh, how generous from Coin. She should have learned about that, just for him. Wonderful.

_" Soldier Mellark, please take your schedule. " _directed a man's voice.

The guard that just appeared at the feet of his bed indicated one of the green walls to Peeta. What? What was he supposed to do? The guard sighed, seeing that the boy didn't make any move and took his right arm forcefully. He pushed it against the wall, on a darkest piece of it. There, in a blue ink, appeared numbers and words. Peeta could only stare at the symbols on his skin.

_" This won't disappear with water, alcohol or soap. Not before 10 PM. "_

Peeta nodded. A doctor then walked in, in a light grey blouse. He checked him and wrote a lot of informations about his physical situation, about the fake leg. Then he gave him an electronic bracelet where the boy could read " Mellark Peeta, Soldier, 17, HR, room 803. "

_" I'm sorry but, what does HR mean? " _The blond asked, still staring at this new element.

_" High Ranking. You are, in some kind of way, a privileged one. "_

_" Okay… Thanks. " _Peeta said, nodding.

Then both the guard and the doctor left his bedroom. The buy stared down at his wrist and saw that he had 'breakfast' in just five minutes. He exited his room, having no idea where the cafeteria was. Fortunately, he saw Gale, a few meters away. Unfortunately, Prim and Katniss' mother were there too. He swallowed and took a moment to relax, closing his eyes. How was he going to explain what happened?

_" Oh… Peeta. " _Gale said, turned towards the blond.

Peeta smiled to Gale in a cheerful way, but got nothing but a glare as an answer. He couldn't blame Katniss' best friend for that. They simply shook hands. Primrose smiled shyly and then hugged him tightly. Peeta gave in, not really knowing how to react to this kind of thing. He could see upon the girl's head that Katniss' mother was thiner than before, and looked weaker too. He wasn't going to talk about her daughter. Not today. Nor tomorrow. Never… He would never be able to talk about it. He would never be strong enough to do so.

_" Where is this place we eat it in? " _the blond asked.

_" Just follow us. I think we'll share the same table from now on. " _Gale answered.

Great. It was going to be harder not to talk about Katniss. He really didn't have the strength to do so. Not in front of people that loved her too, maybe even more than he did -but this was not the point. They got to the canteen quite fast and Peeta took a few minutes to find his plate. The breakfast of the day was a portion of dried peach, a glass of milk and a slice of bread. More than enough for the boy. He tried to eat as fast as he could to avoid the moment he would have to talk about what happened during the Quarter Quell. About the reason he couldn't get Katniss back to her family.

_" So… Was she alive when you escaped the arena? " _Gale asked, staring at his plate.

Peeta could only shoot the boy a death glare. How could he do this kind of thing? Was he stupid?! He chose not to answer that.

_" I shouldn't be sitting here… Not when she's… when she is… " _Gale started.

The blond coughed and complimented Prim about her new ribbon. He had to cover what Gale was about to say, at any price. The young girl told him that she took special lessons in order to become a doctor, and that her mom found the ribbon. Then she gave it to her to congratulate this news. Peeta smiled, because he was sure that Katniss would be very proud of her sister. He finished his milk calmly, setting the glass on his tray. Gale stood up, chewing the last piece of his peach, looking down at Peeta, defiant.

_" I hope we'll work out a solution. With Coin. " _he stated.

Peeta was confused. He has never been close to Gale, but quite the opposite. But he knew how Katniss was important to his eyes, and vice-versa. He could understand why the other boy blamed him for coming here in 13 without her. But it wasn't as if he wasn't angry himself. He totally understood him. But his lack of confidence in Coin put him on the defensive and he didn't know what to answer. So when he opened his mouth, uncertain words came out.

_" We will find something. I'll do my best, everything I can. " _he said, his voice shaking.

_" I hope so. "_ Gale answered._ " We'll see each other at the Commandment Center. "_

Gale left just like that, followed by Katniss' mother. Primrose was still seating next to Peeta because she didn't finish her meal yet. The boy was ravished because he really appreciated the little girl.

_" He's angry seeing me here instead of Katniss. I shouldn't be here. I get him, but it's hard enough… " _Peeta sighed.

_" Yeah… I suppose he's not happy to see you back without her. He thought you would do anything to save her. " _she paused and saw the distress in the blond's eyes. _" I'm not saying you didn't, I have no idea about what you had to go through, nor about what happened after she broke the arena. " she added, smiling sadly._

_" Her not being here… Is really a hard thing to bear. " _

_" I know. But don't blame yourself. I'm sure you did all you could. " the girl reassured him._

Primrose was really wise. It was the quality that Peeta liked the most about her.

_" I am the angriest… and the most disappointed one. " _he started. _" I should not be here, I should be dead. " _he continued, his voice trembling._ " And Katniss should be with you in 12, sharing precious moments with the ones she loves the most while waiting for the Victory Tour to start. "_

_" She loved you, you know… " _the girl murmured, nodding to herself.

_" I… I don't think so. " _Peeta answered, cracking a fake laugh.

_" It's true though. " _the girl said, smiling. _" You really mean something to her. And she wanted the best for you. "_

_" Yeah, she wished the best for me. " _the boy admitted, smiling. _" And I am sure she's happy right now because I'm not in the Capitol. " _he continued, his voice unsteady. _" She's so stupid… " _he added, laughing in a broken-hearted way.

Peeta hid his face in his hands. This was not a time to break down, even less in front of Katniss' sister. He had a lot of things to think of and to do. And there was this a hope that Katniss was still alive, and that they could bring her in 13. Prim put a gentle hand on his forearm and squeezed it slightly. The boy raised his head and saw her smiling, compassionate and empathic.

_" Be strong. As she actually is, for all of us. Be brave as she has always been. " _she almost ordered the boy seating next to her.

Peeta wanted to tell her that this was not true, that Katniss' wasn't always strong, that she had her moments of vulnerability. But Prim didn't need to hear that kind of thing. She already knew about her sister's nightmares, and it was more than enough, already too much. She just ignored about all the things that came with it.

_" You're right. This is no time to be a wet blanket. " _He said, nodding.

**NDA : Hi guys, this has been the second chapter of my fiction!**

**I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoy writing this story.**

**I apologize if there's any mistake, I'm still french (haha).**

**See you in the next chapter,**

**bisous. :)**


	3. Chapter 3 : His word to say

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 3 : His word to say**

He took a peek at his schedule. " Commandment center " was now written at 9, in less than 5 minutes. Peeta sighed and smiled to Prim.

_" I have to go and see Coin, see you later, maybe at lunch. " He said, a slight smile on his mouth._

Prim smiled back and Peeta exited the cafeteria, heading to the place where he met the president of District 13 the day before. He stepped inside it and was not surprised when he saw the people standing in. Coin, Plutarch, Haymitch, Finnick, Beetee in a wheelchair, a man he knew nothing about and Gale. Interesting.

_" Well, well. Let's start this meeting. " _Screamed the President, impatient.

_" Hello everyone. Let me introduce myself, I'm Boggs, Coin's secondhand. I'll be here if you need any help. Don't hesitate to ask me questions. "_

Coin rolled her eyes and sighed, adjusting her clothes, the same uniform everyone wore in 13, grey and sad.

_" We have to know if the girl is alive. "_

Peeta felt his blood race in his whole body, he felt rage and anger run from his knees to his head, he was about to explode.

_" This "girl" has a name. " _Growled Gale, as angry as he could.

Gale looked at him, and smiled. They definitely could have a shot at being friends. Well, maybe. Coin wasn't smiling at all. She stopped in front of Peeta and gauged him from head to toes.

_" Soldier Mellark, if every single one of my words get you annoyed, you'd better leave this room and never come back. " _Coin spit coldly.

Peeta bit his tongue. His place in this conceal could save Katniss' life. He had to do everything to stay here. So he lowered his head.

_" Excuse me madam. This won't happen again. " _The blond mumbled.

_" I hope so, soldier Mellark. "_

Coin then turned her back to Peeta, that took this opportunity to close his eyes and relax, focusing on his attitude. He had always been good with words and speaking. He may be able to be liked by the president, to make her trust him and even like him. Then, it would be easier to save Katniss. Katniss, that was all that mattered to him. More than Snow, more than the revolution, more than his own life. He had to try as hard as he could to save her, to keep her alive. He promised he would do so. He suddenly felt the arena close around him, and it was like neither Katniss or him escaped it and that they were both still fighting for each other's life. This thought gave him strength and he opened his eyes, willing to do all he could.

_" We have to get this information, I sent a message to the infiltrated people in the Capitol. They should answer us tonight. If they don't, I'll sent a few soldiers. "_

_" Risk life for someone that might be dead… Is it reasonable? "_ Laughed Plutarch shyly.

Peeta clenched his jaw, trying not to shot a deadly glare at Plutarch. He waited, looking at Coin every once in a while, that seemed to reflect about how Plutarch's statement was right or not.

_" I understand what you mean Mr Heavensbee. But both soldier Mellark and soldier Hawthorne won't be at 100% of their possibilities if they don't know if the girl is dead or alive. I'm sure of it. " _Said Coin, walking in circles.

_" I have to admit that the president is totally right. " _Nodded Gale.

Gale looked at Peeta. And the blond boy had to say that he was okay with what Coin just said. None of them would be able to really rest if they had no clue about Katniss' situation.

_" We should collect this information as soon as possible. " _Declared the President.

Haymitch just nodded, his right feet bouncing against his chair again and again. Peeta understood that he wasn't able to drink anymore, here in 13. This should have make him more unstable, insomniac and really mad. Finnick said that this was the best thing to do and Beetee just announced that he didn't get through the Capitol's system for the moment, but that he was still working on it with his team. The man named Boggs smiled and said that the vote was positive, seven yes against one no. If they got no response from the infiltrated, four soldiers, that volunteered, or not, will be send.

_" I hope we won't have to send young, talented soldiers. We have a lack of healthy and good soldiers here. " _

_" I know exactly what I'm doing, Mr Heavensbee. " _Said Coin, her voice as steady as ever.

Coin insisted on the ex Game Maker of the Hunger Games. She focused on Gale and Peeta then.

_" Good. Now, if the girl is dead, what shall we do? " _Asked Plutarch, making Peeta flinch.

_" A ceremony, that will be broadcasted as soon as possible. Interviews of people who met her, or simple rebels that considered her as a model. We will have to make sure she die for a good cause, and that if we gave up on the revolution, the mocking jay would have died for nothing. "_

Peeta didn't know what to think about the man that was Plutarch Heavensbee. He understood perfectly his will to make Snow fall with the monopole of the Capitol, but the man seemed not to care about population dying unless they were young and qualified soldiers. The way he thinks was really different from his, even opposite.

_" I'm not voting. " _Pronounced a shaky mouth.

Haymitch turned on his chair, almost fallen, and shot him a glare where Peeta could see his own feelings. The boy knew that, even if he could be harsh to Katniss, he really liked her. He was sure that hearing his death would make him more depressed than before.

_" Me neither, like the boy. "_

Beetee said yes to the idea, Boggs and Coin too. In the end, it was five yes against one no, because Finnick said he was against it. Peeta smiled sadly at the boy, thanking him. The blond guy gave him a weak smile back, with a discreet head move. Boggs then said happily that the decision was made. He wrote meticulously on a paper and passed it through all the conceal members. They signed it up, showing they were okay to be filmed to push the uprising if the mocking jay was dead. If he knew, Peeta would have voted against it. Use their emotions for television flashes? Immoral and insane.

_" Well, you can go back to your rooms, or go where you schedule leads you. We'll see each other soon. "_

They all exited the room, all but Boggs and Coin. Peeta looked at the heavy door sliding and locking the more important people of the District in the commandment center. What will they talk about now? He sighed and looked at his schedule. He saw " 9:30, reflection ". He understood that he had free time, good. His legs headed him in the highest level, only 150 meters under the ground. He closed his eyes and tried to escape this giant subterranean world, this fourmillière at human size.

_" Katniss… hold on… "_

**NDA : Hey guys! Thanks for reading this new chapter. **

**Lot of words and descriptions, I'm sorry. But don't worry it's coming!**

**I'm so glad that I could post on a friday, once again!**

**Bisous, and see you in the next chapter :)**


	4. Chapter 4 : A friend to talk to

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 4 : A friend to talk to**

After walking for long minutes, Peeta sat down on a bench, in a long corridor of the least deep level of District 13. He would have love to bake, but he was sure Coin wouldn't allow it, because the District had a lack of food resources. They didn't have fishes or meat, just their own vegetable production. Peeta didn't want to ask for the right to bake, even if it could help him relax a bit.

He thought about the fact that Katniss would have been allowed to hunt so she could give her kills in the kitchen. The boy sighed and ran a hand through his blond hair. He couldn't help but think about the fact that Katniss should be in his place and that he should be dead.

_" Peeta, what are you doing here? " _Asked a voice in Peeta's back.

The blond turned to face Finnick, wearing a weak smile. He returned it immediately.

_'"I have nothing to do. I keep thinking about Katniss… And I hate to think that we're under the ground. I miss the sun, the wind, the sky… "_

_" Yeah… I do miss the sea."_

Peeta hit the bench on his left, inviting the taller blond to sit down. Finnick did. Then there was a silent hanging in the air. But it wasn't uncomfortable, just calm and appealing.

_" You shouldn't have use PCR on me… Even thought I appreciate the move. "_

_" The objective was to save both of you. "_

_" So why trying to make us split at the tree? " _Asked Peeta, a little bit too fast.

_" Well, I didn't agree with that… But Coin thought it would leave more chance to save at least one of you. And she really considered your ability to speak. She thought it could really help to lead the revolution. This woman has good convictions, but the way she thinks and acts is unpleasant. I don't like it. " _

Peeta stared at the tribute from District 4, at this boy that he thought he would have to kill in the arena, and felt sympathy for him. With him, more than with Gale, he totally could see a friendship grow, a sincere one.

_" I have to admit that when I woke up in the hovercraft, and I realized Katniss' absence, I wanted to kill you, all of you. Even more Haymitch because he lied and betrayed me. I apologize for that. "_

_" It's normal Peeta, there is a moment when you have to blame someone. " _Replied Finnick, sure of himself.

_" It's nobody's fault, or mine because I should've save her by dying. She had to go back to her family. Or I should've stay by her side all the time. "_

_" But it's a good thing you didn't push us to stay with Katniss. Our alliance would have failed then. "_

_" Really? I thought that you would have understand our will to stay together? " _Said Peeta, quite surprised.

_" Why? Because of Annie? " _

_" Maybe… I don't know. You're the one to tell. "_

_" That's right. If I had been with her in that arena, I would have never let her go away from me. I would've kept her by my side. "_

Finnick sighed slowly. Then he opened his blue eyes and turned them towards Peeta, waiting for more explanations.

_" If I took your side, agreed with your idea, Snow could've had understand and we'd all be dead now. " _Finnick admitted.

_" … But Katniss is in the Capitol, or dead. It's haunting me all the time. It keeps on running in my head. It's the only thing I think about. Her being tortured, hungry as hell, beaten… Or deceased, her corpse decomposing in one of Snow's prison's cell. " _Said Peeta, his voice shaking.

_" I don't know if Annie is okay either. "_ Finnick answered, his voice cold as ice.

_" I think they won't do anything to her. "_

_" What do you know about that?! " _

Finnick yelled, his arms gripping the bench. His torso moving at the speed of his erratic breathing rhythm. He seemed totally insane.

_" I'm… Excuse me… I thought that regarding her state… They would, leave her alone. "_ Peeta stuttered, embarrassed.

_" Oh yeah? Because she kinda lost her mind after her Games? "_

_" We were all different when we came back. "_

Finnick relaxed instantly, his shoulders falling, his fingers losing their grip on the bench. He let himself fall on the back of it completely.

_" Sorry… I didn't want to scream at you." _Finnick whispered.

_" It's okay. "_

_" You might be right. They consider her as a fool, crazy girl. There's a chance they'll do nothing to her. "_

_" I hope so. "_

The tall blond smiled at the smaller one and they remained silent again, never disturbed by any habitant or guard. Maybe this floor was only accessible to the " High Ranking" people.

_" I'm truly sorry for Katniss… You really seemed in love. "_

_" I am. It has always been one-sided but it was enough to me. "_ Said the smaller blonde, smiling.

_" Don't say that. I think she loves you too. "_

_" If you say that to cheer me up, you can stop. I never believed it. She did all she could to win sponsors, save her family and win the Games and not because she fell something for me. "_

_" I thought this too… " _Finnick admitted frankly.

Peeta smiled sadly at Finnick. He always knew he felt something for the other tribute from his district and that she would never love him back. It was hurting him, but he was okay with it. He even accepted the fact that Katniss was in love with her best friend, Gale.

_" But, when you hit that force field, I could see how wrong I was. She loves you, I give you that. Even thought I don't know how, and I'm pretty sure she doesn't know either, there is something, no one can deny that. "_

_" Still there's Gale. "_ Peeta sighed.

_" This boy from 12? "_

_" Yes, Katniss' best friend. I'm pretty sure he hates me as much as he hates Snow… " _

_" Oh yeah, Primrose told me a lot about him. She said he was really jealous of your relationship with Katniss. "_

_" Basically what he saw on television. " _

Finnick rolled his eyes and turned to face completely the other boy.

_" Why do you think he's jealous of you, Peeta? " _Finnick asked, quite tensed up.

_" Because he believes what Snow's television wants to show. Because Katniss accepted to do all of that. "_

_" No, no. Because he knows there is something. I bet he's not stupid, and he knows that Katniss had to do it, to save her family, you and himself. I think he has doubts because Katniss is having a lot of reflections about you. And I can tell you that there is this thing. "_

_" If you say so… " _Whispered Peeta.

_" You had some times together, didn't you? Out of the interviews? "_

_" Hum… Yes. On the train. In the Capitol before the Games. "_

_" And? "_

Peeta felt his throat aching, and had to clench his fists not to think about Katniss, tortured over and over, once again. He inhaled deeply and tried to calm down.

_" And I don't know what to think. It's true that we always slept together. But I really don't know if it meant something personal to her. "_

_" It's still something Peeta. "_

_" But when Gale got whipped on the place, she… You should've seen her. You'd be convinced, you'd have no doubt that she loves him. " _Explained Peeta, his voice unsteady.

_" And during the Games, nothing? "_

_" Well, this moment on the beach. I told her that she had to live. Because she had her loved ones, that they needed you in 12. And I said that if she died, I'd have nobody left. She asked about me. I answered that nobody needed me. "_

_" What did she say? "_

_" That she needed me. "_ Peeta said with a small laugh.

_" You see? I told you so! And then? "_

_" She kissed me. Then Johanna called us to head to the lightning tree. "_

Finnick smiled and ran a hand on his tired face. Peeta really appreciated him, he felt this bond starting to grow between them.

_" She's always so confused… I'd like to believe you, but it's so complicated. "_

_" This kiss isn't nothing Peeta. " _Finnick sighed.

_" No way to know what she was thinking. Maybe she did it because of Snow, because we had to convince him we were in love. I'll probably never know. But I don't really care at the moment. I just want her to be safe. The rest doesn't matter. It's the only thing that means something to me. "_

_" I know. I just wanted to know how you felt about that. "_

_" It's nice from you, Finnick. It's really appealing to talk about it to somebody. "_

_" Well, I guess you can't talk about that to Prim or Gale, so now, if you need to, you know I'm here. "_

_" Don't hesitate either. I talked a lot about me today, but I can be a good friend to talk to. "_

_" Oh, I don't doubt it Peeta. " _Said Finnick, smiling to the other boy.

The tall blond got up, stretched and turned towards Peeta, smiling brightly. He offered him his right hand which Peeta hurried to squeeze. Then he left, his hands in his pockets. Peeta took a look at his schedule where "Training" just appeared. He had to get to one of the deeper floor of the District. He sighed, tired and headed to the closest elevator. When the metallic doors opened in a bright wind, the machine was empty. The journey stopped at the 8th floor, where Gale and Haymitch got in. Peeta nodded to him, not saying anything. It took three minutes to get to the level where the training center was located.

**NDA : Another chapter! God, it's hard to write new ones and translate the others at the same time.**

**Sorry if there's any grammatical or orthographic error in it! I'm still a french girl by the way :)**

**Bisous, see you in the next chapter!**


	5. Chapter 5 : I hate to fight anyway

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 5 : I hate to fight anyway**

The elevator's doors opened and Peeta could see a long corridor, with guards all the way. He felt uncomfortable and felt being watched, but he kept his head up, his metallic leg hitting the ground in a deep noise. Gale didn't say a single word to him, nor did he looked at him since they walked in the elevator with Haymitch, that tried to start a conversation, even if it was really superficial. At the end of the corridor, a guard, with a sign on his right shoulder. told them to stop their walk.

_" Bracelets and schedules please. You'll pass the text exam once at a time. " _Said a guard.

Both three men nodded and Haymitch went first. So Peeta and Gale had to wait together, in an awkward silence. The blond was impatient, wanting to leave this young boy that didn't show him any attention or sympathy.

_" Next, please. "_

Gale did a head move for Peeta to understand that he wanted to go last, and the blond one nodded. He headed to the small room, grey like the whole District was, where a wounded, muscled man was waiting behind a desk.

_" Bracelet. "_

Peeta held his arm, and the man took notes on a block. Then he turned Peeta's wrist to take a peek at his schedule, lurking at the blue writing.

_" Peeta… Mellark. Age? "_

_" 17 years old. "_

_" Your condition here in 13. "_

_" High Ranking. "_

_" Which District do you come from? "_

_" 12. " _Answered Peeta, his voice shaking.

_" Something particular to say in order to become a soldier? "_

_" Victor of the 74th Hunger Games. "_

_" Good. "_

The man told him to get up and go to the next room where another soldier waited for him, standing behind a desk.

_" Peeta Mellark, right? "_

_" Exact. "_

_" I see that President Coin advised you to be in our garrison… Speciality if there's any? "_

_" Camouflage and sword. "_

_" Good. 1m68 and 65kg? "_

_" Yes. " _Peeta sighed, exhausted of those same monotone voices.

The man explained to the boy that before he could start any training, he had to see a psychologist. He will have to answer some questions, related to the revolution, and his mental state. He was guided to the last room, where an old man, close to his sixties, waited for him, cross armed. He showed him a couch where he sit immediately. The psychologist adjusted his glasses on his nose.

_" I'm gonna ask you a few questions. But before that, you'll have to put this thing on your finger. "_

Peeta did. He knew this was meant to check his heart beat. He took a deep breath and fell back on the couch.

_" First question. Why do you want to get enrolled in the army of the District 13? "_

_" I never approved Snow's government. This small group of privileged that need nothing and all the others citizens that can never make it to the end of the month, forcing them to add their child's name in the participants of the Hunger Games. "_

_" Good. Are you against the Hunger Games? "_

_" Obviously. I always hated the simple concept. I had to be part of it, and I think no child should have to kill another, or die of hunger, thirst, injuries, cold or sickness in an arena. And no parents should have to cry his son or daughter, or congratulate them for surviving this abomination. I was forced to participate, and I killed personally only one person. I regret it, a lot. I hate to fight anyway. "_

_" Well, if you hate to fight, why care to join our army? " _Asked the doctor, suspicious.

He wasn't going to talk about Katniss now. He should keep this new and its impact for later. Maybe to show his personal motivations.

_" For all those kids that died for nothing. For all of those family that had to, well, were forced to mourn their own child not able to do anything. For my family, that died in the attack on District 12. "_

_" Okay. "_

The man was writing on a notebook, nodding slightly behind his big round glasses.

_" Then, will you die for the revolution? "_

_" Yes. If it means that I helped. If I did all I could to take Katniss back, away from Snow and his people. "_

_" Will you die for another soldier? "_

_" Yes. "_

_" For District 13? "_

_" Yes. "_

_" Personal motivation, if there's any? "_

_" Katniss Everdeen. She's a Capitol's prisoner but she should be here, ready to join your army, on her family and friend's side. I'll do all I can, even die. "_

_" And yours? "_

_" I'm sorry? " _Asked Peeta, revolted.

_" You don't want to make the Capitol fall, personally? For you? "_

_" Of course I do. But Katniss is my motivation. She's all I have left, she's everything I've got. "_

The psychologist smiled and nodded again. Peeta was satisfied. This should do it. He had to join this army. The man looked at his page again, and stared into Peeta's eyes for a while.

_" Very good. Results are good. You can leave and see the chief, Paylor in the training place. "_

_" Thank you. "_

He exited this next room and walked in what seemed to be a big hangar. A woman very cut and thin, walked towards him, with a careful hand on her service's weapon, hanging on her right hip. She studied Peeta from head to toes and hanged her hand to him. The boy shook it firmly.

_" Chief Paylor. And you are? "_

Peeta looked at her. She was very beautiful woman. In her twenties, brown hair and light brown eyes with a firm and thin face.

_" Soldier Mellark Madam. "_

_" So, did you specify any speciality? "_

_" Camouflage and sword. "_

_" Interesting. But we'll have to initiate you to shooting guns. "_

_" I'm not sure that it will… "_

_" This wasn't a question soldier Mellark. " _Groaned Paylor.

_' Hum… well, okay. '_

_' We're about to begin. Join the others. '_

The boy looked at the people that were here with him. A hundred, maybe less. Gale just walked in, and was now talking with Paylor, that seemed totally happy with her new recruit. Peeta couldn't help but be angry about that.

_' Good morning soldiers. We're about to start a new training cycle. I'll be really clear with you about this. No late soldier will be allowed in the training. When you're late three times, you'll be invited to a special meeting with Coin and myself. The training goes this way. Half an hour of training all together, half an hour while you'll train in your speciality and one hour of shooting, with a gun and then with bow and arrows or a crossbow. Any questions? '_

Only silence answered Paylor.

_' Good. Let's start. Run. '_

A huge noise reverberated in the hangar, grey shoes from 13 hitting the ground, again and again.

_' Rhythm, get some puff! If i caught someone who's walking, you'll regret it. '_

After 10 minutes of running faster and faster, Paylor left the recruits walking, stopping and breathing for a few moments.

_' Train your wrists, your ankles and the nape of your necks. After that, do fifty push-ups. Girls can proceed on their knees. When you're finished, form two groups. '_

Some soldiers halved theirselves and waited for the others to finish. Paylor was walking around the hangar, ready to give them new orders.

_' The person in front of you will be your partner. It will be an hand-to-hand fight. The goal is to immobilize your team-mate on the ground for 10 seconds, no more and no less. No strangling will be allowed. '_

Peeta was associated with a taller boy, but he was clearly less muscular. His brown curly hair fell on his big black eyes. They saluted each other and started to fight. Peeta tried to make in fall, hitting his feet and legs, but nothing came out. The other boy took advantage of one step back, but the blond boy kept his balance. Then Peeta took hold of him around his waist, lifted him on top of his shoulder and brought him down on the ground below him. The other boy was lost and gesturing under him. The ten seconds passed and Peeta helped his partner to get up. The boy thanked him and smiled to him.

_" You're okay? "_

_" Oh, yeah, don't worry about it. " _Laughed the other boy, accepting his hand.

_" What's your name? "_

_" Jazz Lokart and you are? "_

_" Peeta Mellark. Glad to meet you. "_

_" Same. We'll see each other again I guess. "_

_" SILENCE! Now that every pair finished their fight, you'll do fifty more push-ups. "_

The training kept going, and when it ended, Peeta was exhausted. He didn't do so great in gun shooting but he had kind of a talent with a crossbow in hands. When he exited the hangar, a towel on his wet shoulder, he saw Finnick, almost shining with happiness.

_" Peeta! This training session was really a benefit to me. Sport is a big part of me. I feel better while doing it. "_

_" I don't know how you are still in good shape after that… I dream of a good shower and a long sleep in bed. "_

_" I'm not sure you'll be able to take a nap, handsome. " _Said Finnick cockily.

_" Oh really? " _Peeta asked, quite surprised.

_" Meeting at Coin's after lunch. "_

Peeta stopped walking and sighed, seeing on his forearm that Finnick was right. He had fifteen tiny minutes to take a shower and run to the cafeteria. And twenty minutes later, " Commandment Center". Wonderful

**NDA: Another chapter guys!**

**So disappointed with this one, I just don't like it.**

**Well, i'll see you next week with a whole new chapter :)**

**Bisous, and see you!**


	6. Chapter 6 : Never be able to be friends

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 6 : We'll never be able to be friends**

Peeta was in his room, taking a new clean uniform from 13 and a towel in his cupboard. He got out and locked the door. He ran to the bathrooms. Then, he entered the first available cabin and closed the grey door behind him. He undressed rapidly and placed himself under the stray of water. Water wasn't as cold as he imagined, but quite tepid. He sighed of relief but quickly remembered he didn't have any second to enjoy this relaxing moment. He soaped and rinsed himself before drying off. He got dressed as fast as he could, almost falling on the cold floor. Then, he exited the cabin and tossed his dirty uniform in the common laundry basket and could finally head towards the cafeteria, where he joined the Everdeen's and Hawthorne's table. He could see everyone feasting over a flat of broccolis and soya. A smile settled on his lips when he saw Gale giving pieces of broccolis to his family members, not awakening the slightest suspicion from the guards.

_" So, how did you training session go? " _A girl's voice asked from Peeta's left.

Peeta smiled to Prim. Her hair style was similar to the one Katniss wore during the reaping of the 74th Hunger Games. A vice seemed to form in his chest, and a pain he knew by heart resurfaced. Even thought they were doing great on their side, Katniss was still in the Capitol. And the boy couldn't think about something else.

_" Good. Let's just say I'm not a man for guns. "_

_" I saw you did pretty well with a crossbow. "_

_" Oh, you think so? "_

_" I do. That wasn't bad for a first try. " _Mocked Gale.

The taller boy smiled to the other, and gave an additional branch of broccoli to his younger sister. They kept talking about training, Paylor and some soldiers. Peeta felt more comfortable than this morning. The cafeteria could become a cool place to be in, unlike his room.

_" So Coin wants to see us again? "_

_" Seems like new informations came in. "_

_" Well, about that, we have to hurry. Only 8 minutes left. "_

Gale nodded and finished his plate. Peeta did the same and walked out of the cafeteria, following Gale's trajectory.

_" What kind of informations? "_

_" Katniss. I heard the infiltrated in the Capitol got news about her. "_

_" You know if they're good? " _Asked Peeta, scared of the answer.

_" I have no clue. Coin will enlighten us. "_

Peeta didn't say a word and they walked in this silence until they reached the Commandment Center. All that mattered to him, all he wanted… He will have his answers now. Stress and anxiousness were growing inside of him. Katniss had to be alive, there was no other way. Another option was just unthinkable.

_" Hurry up, we're about to start. "_

They all settled down, waiting impatiently for Coin to announce all she learned recently.

_" Infiltrated people in the Capitol gave us news about the girl's situation. "_

An heavy silence was hanging in the air, and Peeta felt his heart beating in his left temple. Pounding again and again, driving him nuts. All the present people were shooting glares all around them, except Coin and Boggs. The man was wearing a tired and desperate expression on his old face.

_" We're sorry to announce the mockingjay's death. " _Declared the District's President in a tired voice.

Peeta felt his legs trembling below him, and if he hadn't be seating, he would have fell miserably. His mouth opened, but there was no sound. He hid his face in his hands. The world was crashing around him. A loud, deep noise revolved in the room. Gale just hit the table, crazy with hopelessness.

_" All my condolences. "_

Haymitch didn't move, his eyes locked on an imaginary point. Peeta tried not to break in tears, but he didn't have time to decide that, and he felt this salted liquid roll and fall in his hands. His shoulders were jumping, and he didn't feel strong enough to keep fighting. Why would he do that if all the people that meant something to him were dead? Why?

_" With this new, I expect a certain professionalism from all of you. We'll film the first television sequences tomorrow at the earliest hour. They will be simple interviews, and Beetee will edit all of that and try to spare it to all Panem. "_

Peeta was still hiding his face in his hands. He didn't have the strength to answer back to the President. Gale suddenly stood up and left the room, the heavy metallic door sliding against its hinges. Haymitch stood up too but sat down next to the blond boy. He settled a comforting and warm hand on one of his shoulder, but Peeta was still crying. He had never been in such a huge pain. And he blamed himself for not being strong enough to bear it.

_" You can go back to your schedule. " _

But Peeta didn't move, and Haymitch stayed by his side, squeezing gently his shoulder. The boy was really thankful for what the man was doing right now. He really needed a shoulder to cry on. All the other people left the room and in one fresh draft, the door closed behind them.

_" Peeta? " _ Asked his ex-mentor gently.

The young boy didn't answer. He wasn't crying anymore, and he slowly raised his head. His face was covered in tears. But the worse of it, was that he didn't feel anything. Not a single one. Nothing but loneliness and emptiness in his chest. Katniss was dead.

_" Peeta… "_

_" I can't… I can't do it… "_

_" I know. " _Admitted Haymitch.

_" I should've stay with her. "_

_" You couldn't do that. "_

Peeta sniffed and crossed a tired hand across his face. He looked at his ex-mentor. The man started a backward movement when he saw his eyes. Hollow and dark. They didn't seem blue anymore. A terrible sorrow was readable in them, and the man suddenly felt guilty. He should've tried anything so Coin would've accepted to save both Katniss and Peeta. Now the girl was dead.

_" It wasn't supposed to end up like that… " _

_" I know. "_

_" I should be the dead one. Not her. " _Barked Peeta.

_" You deserve to live Peeta. After all you've been through. "_

_" No, I don't. I have no reason left to be alive. Not even one. Not now that Katniss is dead. "_

_" Peeta. " _Begged Haymitch.

_" No, Haymitch. I won't change my mind about that. "_

The man sighed and they remained silent for several minutes. Peeta knew that nothing would ever be the same again. Never. He stood up, his legs shaking under his weight, and exited the room alone. His bracelet guided him to a lesson about military strategy, but he ignored it and walked like a ghost in the corridors. He realized his feet leaded him to the higher level of the District. He was surprised to see that someone was seating on the bench were he was with Finnick later in the day. It was Gale.

_" Peeta… "_

The smaller boy seated next to Katniss' best friend. He was staring blankly in front of him, his hands resting on his knees.

_" You're not at the lesson either… "_

_" How could I be able to? "_

_" You're right. "_

_" I don't know how to handle it… I don't know what to do anymore. "_

Gale looked up at him, he seemed angry.

_" I do. We'll find a way to make this fucked up government fall with the help of Coin. Eliminating every single person that stands in our way. I don't even give a shit about it, I won't feel guilty about that. Katniss has to be avenged. And Coin will know how to do that. "_

_" I don't think I'll be as devoted as you will in this task. I don't want other innocent people to die. There's no way I want that to happen. "_

_" You can stay here, with crossed arms, thinking about her all night and all day if you want to, but I'll do something. " _Growled Gale, anger running through his whole being.

_" It's not my fault Gale! I can't get that out of my head since this incident in the arena! I will never be able to think about anything else! " _Screamed Peeta_._

_" Keep on living in the past Peeta. Stay with the dead. I'll run towards the future. "_

Peeta didn't answer. Gale stood up, his hands in his pockets and walked into the elevator. Gale turned around and looked at Peeta just before the door closed.

_" Peeta… We'll never be able to be friends. "_

The door closed and Peeta was stunned. At least, this was a really clear message. He closed his eyes and Katniss' image, lying down, dead in a cell, locked down with handcuffs flashed. He opened his eyes, and tried to calm down. All he could do was cry, he was helpless about that. How did Gale moved forward so fast? He didn't know because he will never be able to do the same. Katniss will haunt him every night and during the day, her face and voice will harass him over and over again. He'll think about her. He couldn't understand Gale.

**NDA: Yay! Another chapter is OUT! :)**

**I know, this isn't an happy one, but things happen.**

**Hope you enjoyed it, and I'll see you in the next one!**

**Bisous, and bye.**


	7. Chapter 7 : Hard to keep going

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 7 : Hard to hold on**

Peeta stayed still, siting on the bench. His head was standing on his knees, that he held close to his chest. For how long, he didn't know. When he looked up, he took a look at his schedule and saw " Grand Hall of District 13 ". He sighed and thought that he had to go there, because if every single inhabitant of 13 was invited to this place, this had to be important. But he completely ignored where was this hall. He got up, and walked to the elevator, he tapped on the level where his room was located and there, Primrose and Katniss' mom walked in. Then, everything became clear in his mind. The announcement… Katniss… His throat thickened painfully and he didn't want to be there anymore, he wanted to disappear deep under the ground. Oh, the irony of the situation…

_" Peeta? You don't seem so good. " _Asked a gentle voice.

_" I'm exhausted. "_

_" Oh, hum… Can I do something, maybe? "_

_" Don't worry about it Prim, I'll be just fine. "_

They remained silent and the elevator, now crowded, stopped at the 20th level, where a bigger crowd was trying to make room in a huge hangar. Peeta tried to sneak through all those people, which was a difficult thing to do. A hand tapped on one of his shoulders and he saw Finnick when he turned around. The boy was smiling sadly.

_" I'm really sorry Peeta… "_

_" That's kind of you Finnick. "_

They waited, standing side by side, for Coin to walk on stage in the back of the hall. When she walked in, everyone got quiet. Inhabitants of 13 didn't seem use to this sort of public announcement. Peeta's heart was beating so fast, he could feel it in his ears. Minutes passed, and there was still no sign from the President. The boy looked around him and noticed Prim and Katniss' mother talking with Jazz, the boy he trained with before. Prim seemed to handle the whole situation pretty good. Better than him at least. Well, she didn't know yet. Finally, the silver hair woman walked and tapped the microphone to check if it was working. She cleared her throat and looked at the crowd in front of her. Peeta saw Boggs, that didn't seem capable to keep his fake smile on.

_" Hello everyone. If I invited you to come here, all together, it's to share with you some news that just came from the infiltrated people in the Capitol. "_

Peeta closed his eyes, trying not to think about Primrose and her mom, anxious about what the President was about to say. Finnick's hand closed on his forearm, they shared a look. Peeta took a deep breath and stared back at the stage, where Coin was immobile.

_" We're truly sorry to announce the mockingjay's death. "_

Shocked noises were revolving in the hall from everywhere. Some people were shouting, angry to learn that their President couldn't save the girl on fire. Peeta heard " liar " and " traitor " many times and thought that Coin may not have the power and control that she wished she had.

_" This doesn't stop the fact that the revolution is still going. We have to do all we can to make President Snow's government fall. We have to make sure that this symbol of rebellion didn't die for nothing. We need to stay strong, and united. "_

The noises were louder now, and Coin was smiling, looking at all those angry people. Maybe she thought that they would fight harder hearing about all of that. Peeta could clearly say that he hated this woman now. With all his heart.

_" ENOUGH! " _Yelled the silver-haired woman.

Everyone focused on Coin, that seemed less impassible than usual, almost revolted.

_" I expect from every single person here some rigor and a cold-blooded attitude. We can lead this revolution to its success and give back its past splendor to the country of Panem. Hope isn't dead, and it will never be. "_

Then, the President of 13 left the stage as quietly as she walked on it. Peeta and Finnick headed back to the elevators, the smaller one shaking as hell. His fake leg sliding on the stone ground.

_" Are you going to be alright? " _Said Finnick, his voice down and deep.

_" I don't… Want to keep going like that. "_

Finnick helped him to walk until they reached the elevator. There, was Haymitch, more down than he had ever been. He was shaking too, but the reasons were totally different. Peeta knew it. His mentor simply wanted to drown his pain in a bottle or two of liquor. He got down to the level where his bedroom was, but Peeta and Finnick stayed in the machine, wanting to get to the highest floor. They sat on the same bench, the one where they try to find peace and refuge. They didn't say a word, waiting for dinner's time to appear on their bracelets.

Peeta didn't feel brave enough to confront Katniss' family looks, but he had to go to the cafeteria. The tension was so dense that Peeta swore he could feel it around him. Only rattling flatwares and coughing sounds were hearable in the room. He was chewing on his potato, not tasting anything. He was still feeling as if he was made of nothing. He was feeling hopeless, and the guilt from Katniss' death was a hard and heavy thing to bear, even more in front of her mourning family.

It was now 9 PM and in an hour, the boy will take a shower. Then he'll try to get some sleep in his room. Prim had to force her mom to eat a little bit of the carrots they had for diner, and Peeta felt guilty. He was the one that couldn't bring her daughter back. He threw his plate, still full of the food he got, and walked to his level where he deambulated like a ghost.

_" Peeta… " _Mumbled a hoarse voice.

_" Haymitch? Are you okay? You look sick! "_

The man was staggering, almost falling at every step he took. Peeta smelled his breath. Alcohol. So he found some, somewhere. Maybe the man paid someone that worked in the kitchens or a guard…

_" I saw it! … I mean, I saw her! Do you believe it? "_

_" Haymitch? What are you talking about? "_

_" I might have drank too much… You get it? She was there before my eyes! Alive! This makes no sense… no sense! "_ Chanted Haymitch.

Haymitch started to laugh uncontrollably, and settled his hands on Peeta's shoulders. Well, he tried. They hit the wall instead. Peeta took a step closer to him and took hold of one of his ex-mentor's arm.

_" Haymitch, I'll help you out, come here. "_

_" You shouldn't…! I don't feel so good… Really not good. " _Warned the older man.

Peeta jumped back fast enough so he wasn't covered in his mentor's vomit. He helped him walking to the showers. He got him undressed, leaving him in his underwear, washed him, dried him and guided him to his room. The man didn't stop murmuring things, repeating " alive ", " no sense " and " impossible " over and over. Peeta sighed and sat him on his bed and thought that the man forced it too much this time.

_" Peeta…? " _Asked Haymitch in a weak voice.

_" Yeah? "_

_" You have to be sure… "_

_" About what Haymitch? "_

_" I saw her! Alive… She was alive! Impossible, isn't it? But there she was… Alive! "_

_" Haymitch, get some rest. You will explain all of this tomorrow morning. "_

_" Peeta… Thank you. "_

_" … You're welcome. Good night. "_

The boy sighed and closed the door behind him when he left his mentor. He got to his room to take a towel, and a pajama in his drawer. He realized a new uniform was delivered for the next day. He headed to the showers and saw the blue ink disappear from his forearm and could take as much time as he wanted in under the stray of water. Well, this had been a long day. His heart ached when he thought about Katniss again. Then, what Haymitch said came back to his mind. Could he be right? Could Katniss still be alive? But then, why did Coin tell everyone that she was deceased. He waited until the water felt cold and his fingers became crumpled to exit the cabin. He got in his pajama, threw his dirty uniform in the laundry basket and walked out of the bathrooms, rubbing his hair with a towel.

**NDA : Wow, this was a laborious one! But it's out!**

**A lot of you told me that it was impossible for Katniss to be dead.**

**Now, do you see what's happening?**

**Well, hope you liked this one. I'll post one before friday if everything's okay.**

**Bisous, see you in the next chapter. :)**


	8. Chapter 8 : A hint of hope

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 8 : A hint of hope**

After a night during which he couldn't close an eye, Peeta decided to leave his bed and stop staring at this oh so green ceiling. He spent his night of sleep thinking about what Haymitch said. Why would Coin lie about Katniss being dead? This made no sense, as his mentor kept saying the day before. But what if what he said was actually the truth? What should he do then? Even if this information was true, how would he prove it? Nobody would ever believe him. He sighed and got his schedule. Breakfast in 10 minutes, quickly followed by " Training ". At least, he will be able to think about something else for a while.

The breakfast was composed with a yogurt, a banana and a glass of apple juice. Peeta wasn't hungry at all, but he forced himself to eat a part of his fruit and drink half of his glass. And Gale was back, after his noticeable absence at diner the day before.

_" I'm very sorry for your loss… I would have done anything to get her back. " _Declared Gale, his head down.

He shot a dark glare at Peeta, that didn't have the will to fight back. Plus, he understood Gale's anger and disgust. He didn't have the strength to do something about the rebellion now that Katniss was dead. On the opposite, Gale seemed more determinated than ever, and Peeta was jealous about that side of his personality. The one that made him able to keep living even when he faced this kind of difficulties.

_" Gale, you shouldn't blame Peeta that much. I'm pretty sure he did all he could to find her in the arena. "_

_" I don't give a damn shit about what he tried to do. He should have succeeded. "_

Katniss' mom fell in tears and Prim had to comfort her as well as she could. Gale kept shooting death glares at Peeta, that was staring at his yogurt without envy. He didn't have the courage to respond to the other boy, anyway, it would have lead them nowhere.

_" I have never been this angry and deceived in my whole life. She has to be avenged, at any cost. "_

_" I apologize for not being good enough. Even thought my excuses won't bring Katniss back. " _Peeta managed to say.

And then, Peeta left the cafeteria. He still had time left before his training, but he had nothing to do and he didn't want to get lost in his thoughts. Paylor was already here when he got to the training hangar, cross armed, facing a little group of early soliders that were starting to stretch out. The boy took a place in the ranks and did as they were, Paylor watching carefully their every move. After a few minutes, all the soldiers were present and Finnick joined Peeta. They were all waiting for the chief's orders.

_" Hey Peeta! "_

_" Jazz! Hello. "_

_" I'm sorry for Katniss. "_

_" So am I… " _Whispered the blond boy.

The three boys spent the common part of their training together, in a perfect silence ordered by Paylor. The dark haired woman shouted that every soldier had to go train their special skill and the boys had to split. Peeta couldn't stand splitting since that night in the arena, but he did what he was told to. He chose camouflage for the day, exhausted by his night. He did his best by painting rocks and sand on his arms. The section's chief congratulated him on his work, and while he was focusing on his left wrist, Paylor screamed that they had to move on and shoot. So Peeta joined Jazz and Finnick.

_" Wow Peeta, your painting skills are unbelievable! "_

_" Thanks Jazz. Glad you like it. "_

_" You're welcome! Oh… I don't really want to shoot with a gun again. I don't like it. "_

Peeta smiled because it was kinda obvious that Jazz didn't like those things. He seemed to gentle to appreciate that.

_" Me neither. I'm at my best with my trident. "_

_" I like the crossbow though… "_

_" Finnick, do you have any information regarding Annie? "_

Finnick straightened up when he heard the girl's name. He looked at Jazz, a terrified expression on his face. Peeta tapped his shoulder and nodded gently to him, making the other blond relax a little bit. Jazz was waiting for an answer, patiently.

_" I know nothing. Oh how I wish I did… And now that we learned about Katniss' situation… I'm worrying. I keep thinking about her. "_

_" I hope she's alright. "_

Finnick smiled to the curled hair boy and headed to the bow and arrows stand. Peeta followed Jazz to the crossbow place. The blond boy was doing a really good job with this weapon, and appreciated it, even thought it took much more time to reload than you did with a bow. Paylor congratulated him and he got in line to shot with a gun.

_" Peeta. "_

The boy turned around and saw Gale, judging him from all his height. He swallowed hardly and nodded.

_" Gale. "_

_" I'm sorry for what happened earlier in the cafeteria, but I'm full of rancor. That's all I have left. "_

_" You have to blame someone for what happened. And I'm the perfect target for it. "_

_" Hum. You should move. " _Suggested Gale.

Peeta almost jumped and took the gun the assistant was handing him.

The rest of the training had been normal, and Peeta felt great when he exited the hangar. He took the elevator with Jazz and Finnick, and they took their shower simultaneously. His thoughts were turned towards Katniss, always her, but also towards what Haymitch said. He had to find him, and understand what he exactly knew. He spent a lot of time erasing the paint on his arms, rubbing them as hard as he could. He stopped the water, and started to dry himself. Jazz was still showering, whistling happily. When he exited the shower, in a brand new uniform, he asked Finnick if he saw Haymitch this morning. He explained all that happened the previous night, and the other boy was listening carefully.

_" I did. He was hanging around the kitchens, probably to get a bottle of something. "_

_" Thank you very much. I have to go there now. "_

_" Shall I come with you? " _Offered the other blond.

_" Well, if you want to. But I don't think we'll learn anything. He was totally wasted. "_

When they got to the cafeteria level, the boys walked, looking for Peeta's mentor everywhere. He was nowhere to be seen. They called his name, nobody answered. Peeta felt stupid looking under the tables, and behind the counters, but Haymitch had to be somewhere in here. After a few rounds, they finally saw him, hiding between two boxes of soya.

_" Haymitch! We've been looking for you everywhere! Why didn't you answer us? "_

The man jumped, apparently waking up. He crossed a hand across his bold hair and looked up at the two boys, standing in front of him, blinking because of the lightening in the room.

_" I, hum. Sorry boys. What do you want from me? " _Haymitch asked, in a snore.

_" You told me things yesterday, and I'd like to know what you saw. "_

_" Oh, I did? Really? " _

Peeta sighed and felt the hint of hope he had shatter to ashes and disappear. Haymitch adjusted his jacket on his back and snored loudly. Peeta felt like he was back at the beginning. He felt a wave of despair grow inside of him and closed his eyes, trying to fight back his anger. Why couldn't he get a single thing done? He was incapable of doing anything, and he was deceiving himself constantly.

_" You told me something about someone that was alive, someone you saw with your eyes. "_

_" That… Yeah, I see. "_

_" Can you tell me more about that? "_

_" Well first, thank you for last night… Without you, I'd still be in this corridor covered in my own vomit. Not very glorious, isn't it? So. I was walking in the level where the Commandment Center is located. A room was open, a room full of computers and electronic boards. And on a screen, I saw her. Katniss was here, alive like all of us. From what my drunk eyes could see, she was having an interview with that Ceasar Flicker-something… Do you believe it? 'Cause I'm not sure I do! "_

Peeta was imagining what his mentor saw, and it sure had to be disturbing. Could it be possible? That would be so great if it was. But before cheering up, he had to think about all the possibilities, even the ones that ended up confirming Katniss' death.

_" Maybe this interview had been recorded before they killed her. This could explain everything. " _Mumbled Haymitch.

_" That's exactly the problem. Impossible to remember a date or some " live " sign thing on the screen. I could barely stand on my legs, so how could I remember such a thing? "_

_" Does something come back to your mind? A detail maybe? "_

_" Well, yes. There was another girl. A cute and pretty ginger one. I think that she won the Games one year. "_

_" Annie?! Oh god! How was she? " _Yelled Finnick.

_" Oh, oh, stay calm boy! I have no idea. But she was alive for sure. "_

Both boys shared a look and thanked Haymitch for those informations. Hundreds of questions were gravitating in Peeta's head. And the hope he thought was dead seemed to come back from its ashes. Finnick saluted Peeta's mentor and they exited the cafeteria, heading to their level of predilection. They were back on this same old bench and took a moment to calm down.

_" You think they can be alive? Both of them? "_

_" I hope so Peeta. This would be unbelievable and absolutely amazing. "_

_" Well, now we have to make sure of it. But how? "_

_" We have to look for that room, and see that with our eyes. "_

Peeta looked at Finnick and nodded. There was no other way to know.

**NDA : Yay, another chapter is out!**

**Are you starting to understand what is happening? :p**

**I'll see you in the next one**

**Bisous.**


	9. Chapter 9 : A plan to work out

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 9 : A plan to work out**

Finnick and Peeta were heading towards the Commandment Center's level, planning on going to that room Haymitch talked about. They were exiting the elevator when Finnick noticed something on his schedule.

_" Coin wants to see us at the Commandment Center. We have to do it later. "_

_" I think it might concern the interviews she talked about yesterday. We had no news even thought we were supposed to have them this morning. "_

_" Yes, you must be right. "_

They walked to the room and sit next to each other. After a few minutes, Gale was the only one missing. Coin seemed annoyed and tired, and when she was about to start talking, he ran in, apologizing because he was having a strategy lesson. The gray haired woman nodded and he sit down.

_" I'm sure you're aware of the absence of any calling for an interview this morning. Boggs and me thought that we had to collect the family and close people too, so we had to delay those videos' realization. I am asking you to check your schedule very often to make sure you won't miss my call. My name will be appearing with a class room number. This doesn't mean we'll film the video in that room, but please try to look presentable. " _

Haymitch growled and sighed. He knew he was the target of this last remark.

Peeta didn't want to have this interview, and he wished no one had to go through it. He could imagine Katniss' mom crying in front of a camera with someone asking things about her dead daughter. Just thinking about it made him want to puke.

_" Regarding you, soldier Mellark, I don't want to hear about any absence at any lesson ever again. This goes for you too, soldier Hawthorne. " _Threatened Coin.

The two boys nodded and the grey haired woman invited all the Conceal's member to leave. Peeta was wishing really hard not to be called for this interview during the day. Because first of all, he had to know if Katniss was still alive. Finnick and him waited in the corridor for everyone to exit the place. But Boggs and Coin were still in the Commandment Center. There was no way for them to enter the next room without them noticing. When Peeta heard the loud and constant electronic noise coming from it, he knew it was the one Haymitch talk about earlier. The one room where he saw both Katniss and Annie alive.

_" We have to make sure Peeta… I'll be worthless if I don't find out. "_

_" I know, I will be too. "_

Peeta thought that he was already useless and hopeless, but he didn't want to make Finnick worry about him, the boy didn't need that. They exited the principal corridor of the floor and found an empty classroom. Finnick was walking endlessly and aimlessly while Peeta was sitting on the teacher's desk.

_" They won't stay here forever, and we'll go and see if what Haymitch said was true. "_

_" We don't have a lot of options anyway. "_

They waited, taking rounds in watching the corridor and the arrival of the President of 13 and her secondhand. Atfer more than half an hour, that made they miss the lunch time, they heard Coin and Boggs voices coming closer to where they were. They got very silent, and waited for the shoes' sound to disappear. When they were both sure it was safe, they exited the classroom and walked towards the room. No guard, better. The room they wanted to get in was closed, so Peeta put his hand on the button to open it.

_" So? "_

_" It's not locked! " _Whispered Peeta, full of hope.

Finnick checked if nobody could see them and they sneaked inside, the door sliding closed behind them. Peeta knew they had to be fast. He stared at a PC, making much more noise than the other machines. He walked towards it and clicked on the mouse. A passcode, obvious. Finnick was looking all around him, staring desperately at the non-working laptops and screens, looking for some kind of button to turn them on.

_" The big red button, good or bad idea? " _

_" What can we lose if they catch us? "_

_" Probably our Conceal's ticket. " _Sighed Peeta.

_" Hum. There's no inscription? " _Finnick asked.

_" No, nothing. Let's keep searching, we'll try that if there's nothing left. "_

Finnick nodded and looked at every single button on the command's board. He called Peeta really quickly. The boy walked and looked at something that looked quite amazing. Technology could be amazing when not related to the Games.

_" Do you think it's some kind of a bracelet's reader? "_

_" Same shape. I'll try. "_

He put his bracelet on the machine and a huge screen lit up. Both guys were stunned, before them, the computer was collecting every information concerning Peeta. His case seemed to exist since the reaping of the 74th Hunger Games. A vocal recognition was required, in case the used bracelet had been stolen obviously.

_" Peeta Mellark. "_

_" Access authorized. "_

The computer was back on a sort of desk. Peeta had to find files concerning Katniss. But there was no only a few chances to be able to look at it.

_" Katniss Everdeen. " _Said Peeta, his voice unsteady.

_" Top Secret. Passcode? "_

Finnick clenched his jaw when he heard the question, Peeta just hit his forehead with his free head. It was obvious they would be a code for that! Finally, he sighed. There was a ton of possibilities. Numbers, letters, symbols and combinations of them. No way to guess such a code. Even less when it was a top secret file.

_" Cancel. "_

_" Cancel the search. " _Answered the computer.

Finnick got closer to Peeta, so the machine wouldn't hear him. The smaller boy nodded and cleared his throat before going on.

_" Ceasar Flickerman's interviews. "_

_" Access authorized. "_

Peeta whispered something in Finnick's hear. He told him it was way too easy, way too stupid from Coin to give permission for those videos.

_" Chronological order. "_

_" Ordering in process. "_

The computer was making a huge noise, ordering the thousands of videos. Peeta was afraid someone would walk in. Finnick said that he locked the door behind them. The smaller boy thought that guards and people working in there would still come in and catch them. Both boys waited for the process to end.

_" Watch Interview 1. "_

_" Interview 1. Ceasar Flickerman. Waiting for confirmation. "_

The ex tributes waited, their blood boiling in their veins, while the computer analyzed both the video and Peeta's profile.

_" Access authorized. " _ The computer announced.

Before their eyes, was Ceasar Flickerman, in a bright yellow suit. His hair were close to a fluorescent pink, as were his eyebrows. He seemed tensed and the crowd seemed really different than usual, calm and almost anxious.

_" Volume up. "_

The machine didn't answer, but now Finnick and Peeta could understand what was happening on stage.

" We witnessed something incredible and unusual during this Quarter Quell. A big, huge, massive explosion. Yeah, I know, I know folks! Ha, ha! But, on a more serious note, we have no idea of what happened to three of our tributes… Beetee Latier, Finnick Odair and Peeta Mellark. I hope they're doing good, anywhere they are! But, we are glad to have other tributes with us tonight!

Annie Cresta, Johanna Mason and Katniss Everdeen! "

_" Oh my god Peeta… Here they are! Even Johanna! " _Laughed Finnick.

_" Interview informations. "_

_" Acces authorized. "_

A note appeared and the video kept going in the background. People in the crowd were cheering up. But Finnick and Peeta didn't want to celebrate. There was no date.

_" Interview's date. "_

_" Information unknown. "_

Peeta suddenly felt down and tired. He believed that they would never find out is the two girls were still living at the moment. Coin thought about everything. Maybe she guessed that they would come here to learn more, or make sure about Katniss' death.

_" I guess… We'll never know. "_

Finnick wanted to shout what he thought to Peeta, but the machine was still on, so he whispered as loud as he could.

_" Don't say that Peeta, we can not give up! We have to ask people what they know! Look, maybe Paylor knows something! "_

_" She won't help us. "_

_" You're right. " _Admitted Finnick, suddenly powerless.

Peeta sighed, and stared at the screen where Katniss just appeared. A dying sound escaped his mouth when he saw her face. It was as if she was still alive, in the Capitol. But she was supposed to be dead. She spoke and her voice hit Peeta like a punch in the face. He tried to wrap his whole being around it. Then he realized something. She seemed alright, she looked good. So they didn't torture her?

_" I know Peeta, I know! There's Beetee! There's a chance he could agree to help us! "_

_" Well, we have to try. "_

Peeta was staring at Katniss, at her dress. A black one, with shades of grey. It reminded him of a consumed fire, dead. And he swallowed hard, trying to hold back his tears.

_" Close the file. "_

_" File closed. "_

_Peeta couldn't stand to look at the image of Katniss any longer. He felt this pain again. It was strange cause he only felt emptiness since he heard about the girl on fire's death. He didn't know what was worst. The boy was about to remove his bracelet from its place when a "beep" sound started._

_" New file concerning Interview Ceasar Flickerman. " _Announced the mechanical voice.

_" Access the file. "_

_" Access Authorized. "_

_" Interview Ceasar Flickerman, recording live. "_

A stupidly big smile lit up on both Peeta and Finnick's faces. Maybe they'll have guests again… Special guests that weren't supposed to be alive.

" Hello ladies and gentlemen! It's almost 1 PM here in the Capitol and I hope you're all doing good! Are you? I can't hear! … That's better, ha ha! Well, today, a special show… I know, they're all special, right?! But today… it's going to be different. Isn't that exciting? Yes it is, of course! I am sure that you can't wait! Can you?"

Every second was bringing both Peeta and Finnick closer to the truth, and every second seemed to last its own eternity.

**NDA : A tough chapter… That I don't appreciate haha.**

**I'm re-transcripting my chapters so there would be no more ' - ' in it.**

**Hope you liked it, see you in chapter 10.**

**Bisous**


	10. Chapter 10 : It's just inhuman

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 10 : It's just inhuman**

" You loved them, you shivered and bit your nails for them, you cried with their stories. Yes, that's Katniss Everdeen and Annie Cresta! Here to tell us more about their lovers. Husband or boyfriend, Peeta and Finnick Odair, from whom we have no news! Isn't that completely exciting?! Ha, ha! Sure it is ! "

Peeta felt like his heart just stopped. The surprise was so huge! Haymitch told the truth, she was still alive. So, why did Coin lied to them? What for? What could it bring her? Then a light brightened his mind. The President of District 13 thought that hearing about her death could give him a new strength, a new determination. Maybe she thought that it will make Gale and him more implied in this revolution thing. For Gale, it worked very well, but not with him. Coin had no idea how devastated and lifeless the new left him. She was going to pay for that lie. He will tell what he knew to Gale and to Katniss' family. Then both of them would go and see the President to earn some explanations. Or maybe, they'd all go to the interviews and fuck them up, so it could ruin Coin's perfect plan.

_" Finnick, you have to find Gale and bring him in here. He has to see! Then, go for Katniss' family. There's no time to waste. "_

_" Okay, don't move from here and be quiet. " _Whispered Finnick, sliding out of the room.

Peeta stayed in front of the screen, where Katniss just appeared with Annie. She was wearing a simple outfit. Way more simpler than on the other interview. She was wearing a pair of bright jeans, black heels and a similar colored shirt. Her hair were simply going a back, with a single drill falling on her forehead. She looked absolutely stunning. Peeta thought that she even gained some weight, because she looked less skinny than during the Quarter Quell. He looked at his right arm, wearing a scar from Johanna's cut in the arena. Katniss should be the one here, with her close family and friends, he should be the one in the Capitol. And all of this, was because of Coin's choices. He had nothing now. Only the new of Katniss being alive, that he was clinging to.

" Katniss, Katniss… The girl who was on fire. How are you living the absence of your husband, Peeta Mellark? "

" Of course, I don't like that Ceasar… I have no idea where he is, I don't know if he's still alive. How could I be okay with that? I spend my whole days and my whole nights thinking about him… "

" Anyway, we're all behind you, aren't we?! "

The crowd cheered and clapped loudly, supporting Katniss. Peeta wasn't feeling okay. He would give anything to bring her next to the ones she loved. Her mom, Prim and Gale, that were still convinced that she was dead. He wanted to shelter her from where he was, to tell her that he was doing more than okay, and that he was going to get her back someday. But he couldn't do that.

" I don't even deserve him. Peeta is too good for me. He's generous, he cares about others, really. He deserves much more better than me. Anywhere he is… I pray he is alright. "

Finnick walked in the room, quickly followed by an impatient Gale. The boy was looking completely lost. When his eyes settled on the screen, he ran towards it and put a hand on Katniss' silhouette.

_" Is it recording live? Really?! " _Chanted Gale.

Peeta nodded. But Gale wasn't looking, apparently searching for any wound on Katniss.

_" Volume down. "_

_" Volume off. "_

Peeta turned towards Gale, that was still focused on the screen, his eyes shining with emotion and relief.

_" Yes it is. President Coin lied to us. "_

_" This is not possible… This can't be happening… "_

" Come on Katniss, I know a lot of young men that would give everything to be at your husband's place right now! Don't underestimate yourself! And I'm pretty sure he's doing well where he is. Let's hope your paths will cross each other very soon! "

" How could you be so sure? Do you know things that I don't? "

" Well, hum… "

" So don't say he's alright. You don't know that. I keep thinking about that moment. That moment when he will take me in his arms again… "

Peeta was petrified, he couldn't move or say anything. Was she still playing a role to save her life? This is when he started to think about it. She might be acting right now. But she was good at it, very good and convincing. Finnick left again, and ran around the District, looking from Prim and Katniss' mom. He came back 10 minutes later, out of breath. He locked the door behind the women. They had very different reactions when they saw Katniss on screen. Katniss' mom started to cry and Prim was laughing. Probably because both the angst and the sadness of Katniss' lost were now gone.

_" My daughter! My daughter is alive! " _Cried Katniss' mother.

_" We have to have a good talk with Coin. "_

_" I think I have another solution. If you agree with it, of course. "_

Everyone turned towards Peeta, wanting to know about his plan. Katniss' mom seemed to have come back from the dead and Prim seemed really determined.

_" Here it goes. Coin will invite all of us for her interviews about Katniss' death. We just have to figure out which one of us is going to break her plan. Definitely, it won't be me, they would say I lost my mind and treat me as a liar. "_

A silence settled in the room. In the background, Katniss was still answering Ceasar's questions, but no one was focusing on it at the moment. Finnick was the first one to talk.

_" I think that Gale is perfect for that. He's closer to President Coin than any of us is. "_

Both Katniss' mom and Prim nodded, Peeta too. They were going to make Coin pay for what she did, for her dirty lie.

_" She simply wanted to make us move on, and focus on the rebellion. But lying about somebody's deaths, it's just inhuman. "_

_" I don't know if I can do that for you all. I must keep my closeness to Coin, and keep my place in the Conceal. "_ Explained Gale.

Peeta understood immediately what Gale meant by that. With his place and his relationship of trust, he could push Coin to save Katniss. Even if she obviously didn't care about her at all.

_" I think it would be better to send some of us to get some explanations. Less risky. And that will make us avoid those senseless and stupid interviews. "_

Peeta was thinking about what Finnick just said. And the boy wasn't wrong at all.

_" Informations from Coin? I don't think that will work. And I think we all know why she did that. " _Stated Prim.

_" We know that Katniss is alive. But the District doesn't. They must know that their President is lying to them. "_

Prim smiled to Peeta, and the boy was sure they were going to be great friends. Now that he felt better, just learning that the girl he was in love with was still alive, he wanted to do all he could to save her. Maybe she wasn't next to him, but at least, she was still breathing.

_" Gale, are you still okay to be the one to talk with Coin about it? " _Peeta asked.

_" Of course I am. I'll find a way to make her admit what she did. When I'll come back, I will have answers. I promise you. "_

Then, Gale left, his schedule inviting him to a negotiations lesson. Peeta had nothing to do, and he felt strange about it. He wasn't needed in a lot of lessons. Maybe was he about to lose his soldier's grade. Katniss' mom thanked Finnick and Peeta for a whole minute, never stoping to show them her gratitude.

_" It's nothing, really! It's normal to tell you this, even more when it's about Katniss. "_

_" Thank you, thank you so much! I'll never thank you enough for what you did! "_

_" This is more than enough. We're glad that she's fine. Don't worry about it. This is enough for us too. "_ Peeta said, smiling.

Prim hugged the two boys and left with her mom, a big smile on her face. Peeta had to stay. Finnick had been here for him, and so was he going to be there for him. Katniss' interview wasn't over and asked the computer to bring back the sound.

" There we see a moment during which all of us cried and feared for Peeta. He just hit the forcefield, and his heart wasn't beating anymore. How did you feel Katniss? "

" I think it's showing. I was totally lost, I didn't know what to do at all, and Peeta was lying there, not breathing anymore. Finnick earns all the awards. All I ever did was screaming his name and ask him not to die. "

" We can all understand this sudden lack of reaction, the emotion was palpable! Didn't we feel that?! Yes we did folks! "

The crowd screamed and Peeta smiled, happy to hear those words from Katniss. Even thought he didn't know if she liked him as much as she showed. Snow sure had put a lot of pressure on her shoulders since he disappeared. Peeta's smile faded when he thought about that. She was alive, yeah. But death was hanging over her head constantly. She couldn't take a wrong step or it would be over.

_" How do you feel Peeta? " _ Asked Finnick, worried.

_" I don't really know… I'm happy, of course, she's alive… But I am aware that she's in grand danger over there in the Capitol. I want to go and find her, to take her away from Snow and protect her. "_

_" Yeah, I understand that. We're kinda alike about that. "_

Peeta simply nodded. Finnick and him shared a few common points, even thought they were still very different. And he was already considering the boy as a friend of his. He wanted to be there for him when it was needed.

" Now, this moment on the beach, where he proposed to sacrifice himself to let you survive the Quell… A moment that we will never ever forget. " Said Ceasar, his eyes shining with fake tears.

" I'm the one that could never forget about that. I couldn't let him do that, I didn't in the first Games, and I wasn't going to let him. I do need him too much to let him die. I couldn't stand a life without him. "

Peeta felt is heart tightened and had to fight the urge he had to take his bracelet off the place it was resting in. He had to keep going. For Finnick.

_" Peeta?! "_

_" I'm okay, don't worry about me. "_

_" You're sure? You don't look like someone that is okay. "_

The blond nodded and focused on the screen again. It shouldn't be hurting him this much, but it did. Hearing Katniss say those words, was more painful than he thought it would be.

" Sorry Katniss, but don't you have doubts regarding his feelings for you? "

Ceasar Flickerman… This son of a bitch… He appreciated him when he did all he could to make the conversation go in the way they needed it to go. But at this moment, he was doing the opposite thing. Snow was obviously behind all of that, and behind his screen, with a big smile on his lips.

" Of course no, Ceasar! Since the beginning… From the very beginning, he was the one proving his feelings towards me. I was just too blind to see it. "

" Aren't you afraid he could forget about you where he is? "

" No. I'm not. There were things he told me. And it's all that I need. I believe in him. "

Katniss turned her head so she could look at the crowd, ignoring Ceasar from then. She smiled and Peeta was sure he saw tears in her big grey eyes. But there was no visible sign of torture… Not a single sign of torture… No physical sign! Peeta put a hand on his painful temple.

_" I'm so stupid…! " _Peeta groaned, his teeth clenching.

Finnick got closer to him so they could talk without the computer hearing them.

_" What is going on? Why are you saying that you are stupid?! "_

_" Finnick! They didn't torture her! I mean, not physically! "_

_" What do you mean Peeta?! "_

_" I don't think they tortured her in a physical way, because she looks fine. But they should have tortured her physically. Asking her where we are, even thought she has no idea about it! There's no way in heaven they would have let her alone all this time! Why didn't I think about that earlier?! "_

_" Peeta, she seems just fine. I am looking at the same Katniss I met during the games. " _Replied Finnick, his voice calm and appealing.

_" I hope you're right Finnick… Really hard. "_

Peeta scratched the back of his head, trying not to think about what they could have done to Katniss. He tried focusing on the words Finnick just said. The other boy was way more optimistic than he was.

" So Katniss… Now is the moment when Beetee told you that you couldn't take the coil with Peeta. What are you feelings about it? "

" I still blame him for that. I don't understand why he did that. Well, Johanna and Finnick were against that idea too… "

" Did you think it would be the last time you saw him? "

" Of course no, Ceasar. If I did, there would have been no way from me to let go of him. "

" Why do you think he left the arena after you broke it? "

" I have no idea about that… "

Peeta clenched his teeth and felt bad, almost sick. Of course she didn't know, because he didn't knew himself why they did save him.

" A lot of us think that he's a traitor for leaving. Do you feel the same? "

" I don't know. I'm just sad and disappointed that he didn't tell me anything about his plan. "

" But you were the one to break the arena. He couldn't know. "

" Yes, it was me. I wasn't thinking about what I was doing. And I sure didn't know he was about to disappear. I keep thinking about a way… A way things should have happen so he could be here with me. "

" Thinking about that won't bring him here. "

" I know, thanks Ceasar. " Bit back Katniss.

" And maybe, if you didn't break the arena, you could both be here, but to celebrate your victory. "

" Maybe. But that happened."

There was no way both of them could have won. Peeta knew it, and Katniss too. They talked about it before. But what made Peeta afraid, was that Katniss' tone was different. She almost seemed angry and accusatory. Peeta swallowed with difficulty as Finnick settled a hand on his shoulder. Katniss seemed to have doubts about him. He really, really, didn't like that.

**NDA : Guys, I'm so sorry about that release date!**

**I was really busy this time!**

**But guess what, I saw Mockingjay's filming in Paris on thursday! :D**

**I have some pictures, but I really was far away.**

**I saw Josh up close, and he was waving at us, fans.**

**Well anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**It was an hard one to write!**

**See you in the 11th,**

**bisous. :)**


	11. Chapter 11 : In too deep

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 11 : In too deep**

" Well, well. Thank you Katniss for all these answers, that went right through our hearts. Didn't it folks? Of course it did! Ha,ha ! Now, please welcome Annie Cresta! "

Peeta sighed in relief, and Finnick flashed him a white, bright smile before turning towards the screen. Katniss was walking off stage, and the young ginger just walked in, in a white dress. She seemed okay, and was even smiling.

" So, Annie. You won the games a few years ago. How does it feel to be back here? "

" It's really strange, I didn't think it would happen this soon… Not since… Since Maggs volunteered for me. I was sure I wouldn't have to come back. "

" Obviously you didn't… Hum… What were you thinking, and feeling, when she volunteered? "

" I was completely moved, of course! I didn't know how to react to that. I'll never be thankful enough for what she did… Even more now… Now that she's… That she's… " Annie stuttered.

" We got it Annie, don't worry about that. "

Peeta thought that Ceasar was sparing Annie the worst questions. Regarding Katniss, it didn't seem fair. He almost felt jealous before pushing the thought away. How could he be jealous of this girl? After all she's been through? She suffered like hell and she had a very complicated existence. He hit himself mentally and put a comforting hand on Finnick's shoulder, trying to give him the more understanding look he could.

" Finnick… His absence must be a really hard thing to live with, I get that. "

" I… I miss him. Finnick was always so nice to me, he understood me. He never judged me, he never told me that I was a freak, a weirdo or a fool. What I liked the most about him, was that he didn't treat me in a different way. Sincerely, he was always there to support him, and it means a lot to me. "

" Your story is one of the most emotional ones in the whole Hunger Games, Annie. I hope he's fine where he is. " Said Ceasar, an empathetic look on his face.

The ginger girl started to shake, and put a hand on her mouth, covering it. Tears were rolling down her red cheeks, as she was sobbing. Instinctively, Peeta turned towards Finnick, and the boy was as white as a sheet. He seemed like he was about to break in tears. His contact on his shoulder hardened and he shook it slightly. The taller boy smiled and mouthed a shy "thank you".

" Oh Annie, don't. Please don't cry. You have no reason to cry. Finnick is a strong boy, I'm sure he's doing okay. He's really a tough one. Remember he's our youngest victor, you can't take him down that easily. "

" Excuse me Ceasar… But talking about him messes me up. I can't stop worrying about him. I try to stay strong, but not hearing about how he's doing, I can't, I just fail. If he's far away from me, but okay, I am okay too…

" How touching… Ha! " Ceasar sighed.

Ceasar washed away an invincible tear in his eye and the crows cheered, some of them hiding their face in their expensive handkerchiefs. Finnick was smiling again, and it put Peeta at ease. Now, they both knew that the girls were doing alright. And it certainly made their hearts and minds lighter.

" We will obviously keep you in touch about their situations, if any news comes in. Do you have a message Annie? "

" I want to tell Finnick that I'm very proud of him, and that I hope he's doing well. But more important, I want him to stay strong. "

" Thank you very much Annie! " Yelled Ceasar, getting up.

Annie stood up, and shook hands with the colorful presentator. The crows was applauding. Katniss walked back on stage, and the hymn played as the screen faded slowly to black. The Capitol's seal appeared and then, it was over. Peeta and Finnick sighed simultaneously and laughed.

_'" Close session. "_

_" Peeta Mellark's session is now closing. "_

FInally, the screen turned off and Peeta was able to take back his bracelet. He massaged his sore forearm and they took a minute before leaving the room. After all, they had been in here for a long time, and nobody walked in to disturb them.

_" You think they record an historic or something like that? "_

_" Oh god, we didn't even think about that. But now that you talk about it, they certainly do. "_

_" What is done is done. And now, we're both able to move on, and fight. "_

_" More than ever. " _Grinned Finnick.

They exchanged a smile and Finnick exited the room first. Peeta stayed a little bit longer, staring at the screen that wasn't working anymore, a slight smile at the corner of his mouth. He started to laugh on his own, too happy to know that Katniss was still alive. In the Capitol, of course, but alive.

Now, it was going to be about looking for her, bringing her back and let her find her loved ones. Peeta peeked at the corridor, holding the door open. He saw Coin and Boggs heading to the Commandment Center. He had to be fast. He knew that they will know about his sneaking when they'd got in the Center. He had to get away from that corridor as fast as he could.

He slipped out of the room, letting the door close behind him, then walked towards the closest elevator. That wasn't without the hand that took hold of one of his arms. He stopped and turned around, pushing the stranger's hand away with a fast move.

_" Soldier Mellark. "_

_" President Coin. "_

_" Come with me. I think we have a little conversation to have with Boggs. "_

Peeta nodded and followed her in the Commandment Center where Boggs was waiting, cross-armed. He swallowed hardly when he saw his serious expression and fell in the first chair. He pivoted on it and faced the two more important people of District 13.

_" Soldier Mellark, you deceived and disappointed me. "_

_" Oh yeah, really? I did? " _Peeta blurted out.

_" Don't start. Two can play at this game. "_

_" Sorry. Keep going. "_

_" When we arrived, one of our screens warned us of the fact that you spent a lot of time in the machines' room. "_

_" I see. "_

Coin rolled her eyes and sighed, exasperated and irritated. She cracked one of her wrists and adjusted her uniform.

_" What have you been doing in this room during all this time? "_

_" Nothing much. I checked my case. Wanted to see what you have about me. "_

_" Don't lie. " _Coin said, her voice threatening and predatory.

_" But I'm being really honest with you right now. "_

_" No you're not. Right now, Mr Latier is on his way and when he'll get there, he'll know all the history of your bracelet. You better be telling the truth. "_

_" Take back my soldier's rank if you want to. " _Peeta laughed.

_" I will do that. Mr Latier will do it as soon as he finds what you did in this room. "_

Peeta swallows harshly, but kept looking at Coin, straight in her eyes. This woman lied about Katniss' death, and he'll never forgive her about that. You just don't lie about someone's death. Even less with so much indifference and so few compassion. They waited silently for Beetee to arrive. He did, two minutes later, in his wheelchair. He was followed by a few people, that Peeta though to be engineers of 13.

_" So, why did you need me so urgently? "_

_" Analyze his bracelet's informations. "_

_" Okay. "_

Peeta was now surrounded by 3 men, Beetee taking a machine from a bag hanging at his wheelchair. He posed it on his bracelet, the screen lighting up, making a non-stop "beep" sound. Peeta felt his heartbeat raise and sweat forming on his forehead. He was in too deep.

_" So? " _The president asked, impatient.

_" He went in the machines' room, that's for sure. He did some researches, but I can't access these informations. "_

_" But you will. " _Coin added.

_" Just give me ten minutes. "_

_" Do as fast as you can. "_

President Coin was staring at Peeta, from head to toes or looking at what Beetee's engineers were doing on their machines. Le blond boy settled in a more comfortable way in his chair while Beetee often glared at him upon his glasses. He made his wheelchair roll closer to him.

_" What were you thinking about?! " _Beetee whispered.

Peeta jumped on his chair, surprised to hear Beetee's voice in his ear. He scanned the room and cleared his throat before answering the man.

_" Katniss isn't dead. "_

_" It's impossible, Peeta. " _Beetee sighed.

_" That's what I did in that room. I wanted to make sure. "_

_" Alright. "_

Beetee rolled back, letting his men analyzing the electronic bracelet. Peeta didn't know what to expect at all. After a few minutes of silence when the only sound was some "beeps", Beetee turned towards Coin.

_" We found a little historic. He did researches. "_

_" What are they? "_

_" Katniss Everdeen. But he couldn't access it. "_

_" And? "_

_" And some of Ceasar Flickerman's interviews. From a week to a month ago. "_

_" Fine. Thank you Mr Latier. But, before you leave, I want you to erase its soldier's grade to Mr Mellark. Doing things behind our backs is unacceptable and unforgivable. "_

_" Shall I let him his High Rating grade madam? "_

_" Yes. _**For now**_. " _Coin answered.

Coin purposely insisted on her last two words, while keeping her eyes in Peeta's. Beetee nodded and shot a quick glare at Peeta, that nodded slightly, thanking him for lying to the President. Then, he looked at his bracelet, and after a few minutes, Peeta saw the "soldier" mention wasn't here anymore. He almost didn't care. The most important was that he was still in the Conceal.

_" Thank you very much, Mr Latier, you can leave now. "_

Beetee saluted them and left the room, followed by his engineers. Peeta exhaled loudly, and massaged the back of his neck, glad that Beetee lied for him. He will have to thank him properly later.

_" Feeling better now, Mr Mellark? "_

_" I told you I wasn't hiding anything from you. Nothing that important. " _Peeta said, a slight smile on his lips.

_" You should ask if you want to browse your profile. Think about that next time. "_

_" I sure will, Mrs President. "_

_" Then, I think you should leave. " _

The silver-haired woman looked up to him and turned her back to go and talk with Boggs, that didn't say a single word during this whole event. Peeta nodded and left the Commandment Center, feeling less worried than when he walked in.

During this time, Gale was at his training session. A guy behind him told him that he was really sorry for Katniss' death. Gale just answered with a quiet "thanks" and tried to stretch out in peace. Then, it was when he was about to train his special skill, that was bow and arrows. A man, in his thirties talked to him about losing his wife in a -supposed to be- accident, and how he understood how he was feeling. Again when he shot with a crossbow, a boy told him he was really sad that Katniss was dead, and that he thought that Gale was strong to keep looking forward. Then again, when he was about to shoot with a gun for the first time of the day, two girls, about his age, said the exact same thing.

He got suddenly angry, and felt this rage growing in his chest, expanding to his arms, making his fingers shake. A burning fire was making his way through his veins and he felt like he was about to explode. He shot the girls a death glare. They walked backwards, away from him, stunned and lost.

He was going to make the President pay for what she did. Hearing about your best friend's and almost lover's death wasn't a nice thing. Pretending to be strong when you thought she was dead wasn't a nice thing. But learning that this girl is still alive makes you want to kill the person that spared the lie like a running venom.

Sure, Coin was going to pay for that. He just didn't know how. **Yet**.

**NDA: Late once again. I've got no excuse this time ^^'**

**I'm really sorry for the delay but I can't promise I'll be faster soon.**

**A tough one to write. Even thought I got help from a friend.**

**Hope you liked it.**

**See you in the next chapter,**

**bisous.**


	12. Chapter 12 : You just have to fake it

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 12 : You have to fake it**

Peeta's bracelet leaded him to an economic lesson, so he hurried up to get to the classroom. Even thought he lost his soldier's grade, he still had casual lesson to follow. He got there just in time and got involved, asking questions, and even going to the blackboard to solve a problem. So when he exited, he felt great.

This is when he saw Prim, exiting a room, next to his. She had a lot of notebooks under her arms, and was trying to make her way through all the people standing in the corridor. She smiled when she saw him.

_" Peeta ! "_

_" Hi again Prim. "_

_" My lesson was amazing! We learnt how to stop an hemorrhage! " _Said Primrose, excited.

_" This sounds really interesting! " _

_" Oh, I assure you it is. I couldn't stop asking questions. "_

_" That's good, means you're really willing to learn. "_

Prim's bracelet lighted up, and she stared down at it. When she looked at Peeta again, she seemed totally disoriented and lost. Peeta settled a reassuring hand on one of her arms and smiled gently.

_" Peeta, it's Coin! The interview, I mean! What should I do? "_

_" Breathe. It's okay. You just have to act as if you still thought she was dead. I know you'll be amazing. "_

_" But I don't know how to do that! I'm not an actor or anything! "_

_" You just have to fake it. I'm sure you'll be alright. "_

_" I'm not sure, Peeta. What if they understand? " _Asked the small girl, worried.

_" How could they imagine that you know Katniss is still alive? They won't. "_

_" Well, I guess I'll do that. Wish me luck! "_

_" Good luck, Prim. "_

She nodded, holding her notebooks to her chest. Then she ran, peeking at her bracelet every once in a while. Peeta sighed and prayed that she will make it. And he was almost sure she could be really good. The blond boy closed his eyes and wished that the odds will be in their favor. They really needed it.

He kept walking in the corridor to get to the elevators.

_" Oh, Haymitch! "_

_" Peeta… How are you? "_

_" I must admit I'm feeling great. "_

_" Oh, why so? "_

_" What you said… It was true. "_

_" You mean that… Really? Holy shit… " _Laughed Haymitch.

Peeta laughed and Haymitch joined him. It had been a long time since they didn't. And it felt absolutely great. They calmed down and Haymitch asked a few questions about what the boy saw.

_" It was recording live. So we were sure you said the truth. "_

_" Oh, I'm glad… Is Finnick okay? " _

_" Yeah, we saw Annie too. "_

_" Good… Very good. "_

_" But Katniss seemed strange. " _Peeta admitted.

_" What do you mean? "_

_" She seemed… different. "_

Haymitch was just about to talk when the elevator stopped. A few guards walked in, so they talked about something else. Peeta was thankful for all those coaching hours he spent with both Effie and Haymitch. They got down at the eighth level, where they both had their rooms. The old man invited Peeta in his so they could talk freely.

_" What did you mean by 'she looked different'? " _ Haymitch asked.

_" I don't really know. It was like, she had doubts about me. "_

_" Was she sad? I mean, you can't blame her for that! " _

_" No, she seemed angry. "_

_" That's bad news Peeta. " _Haymitch admitted.

_" I know that… "_

After an hour in his ex-mentor's room, Peeta left. His stomach made a lot of noise, reminding him that he didn't eat lunch. He looked at his bracelet and sighed when he saw dinner was in less than two hours. He just had to do something during this time. He walked in the level he was in. There, in a corner, was a plan. Peeta looked at it, nodding when he saw the training center. He was surprised to see there was a TV room at the twelfth level. He decided to go and check it.

Of course, the room was this same shade of gray as the rest of the District was. Peeta found this depressing. A few people were standing in there, talking or watching what was on the screen.

" People of Panem, I want to apologize once again about what happened during this Quarter Quell. This kind of thing shouldn't happen in those days. And I'm even more sorry when I say that there won't be any 76th Hunger Games coming soon. As long as we don't find the tributes that disappeared, no Games will be programmed. Trust me, I'm the more disappointed here. "

Peeta couldn't believe these words were coming from Snow himself. No Hunger Games? Really? This was completely unbelievable. He smiled and was grateful for all those families that wouldn't have to worry for their child to be picked and go fight in an arena this year. What Katniss did sure was crazy, but it sure had an impact on things.

Then, a question came to the blond's mind. How did Coin hide Katniss' interview from earlier? Maybe Beetee, but the man really seemed surprised when he told him she was alive. So, maybe she found another engineer. One that didn't know Katniss at all. This had to be the right explanation. Why would someone do that? Katniss deserved better than that. Coin should be thankful for what she did for the revolution without even knowing about it. But she just didn't. Coin didn't care about Katniss. About what could happen to her in the Capitol.

And there he was, worrying about her again. Wondering what they were doing to her in the Capitol. How she acted earlier, how she was before that. This wasn't the same Katniss. Maybe Finnick couldn't see the difference, but he sure could. He wanted to tell himself to move on, because he might never see her again, but he just couldn't. This was how human were when they had feelings towards another one. It sure was stupid, but they couldn't help it in any way.

The Capitol's seal appeared and Snow's face was no longer on screen. Peeta left the room, remembering its location. He headed back to the highest level to sit on the same old bench. Gale was already sitting on it.

_" Peeta! Where the hell were you?! You missed our training session! Paylor's going to kill you next time. "_

_" Well, you could say I lost my soldier's grade a few hours ago. "_

Gale stared at Peeta in disbelief, and broke in a laugh. Peeta smiled and scratched at the back of his head.

_" How come? "_

_" Well, Coin found out about us being in the machine's room. "_

_" Oh, I'm sure she didn't appreciate it! "_

_" She sure didn't. Beetee saved me over there, though. "_

_" Really? What did he do? "_

_" He lied to her. He didn't tell her I saw the live interview. "_

_" We have to thank him for that properly. " _Stated Gale.

_" We sure do. " _Agreed Peeta.

Peeta sat down next to Gale. He stretched his arms and lied back on the bench. He didn't know how to explain his relationship with Gale. Sometimes they fought against each other, sometimes they laughed together and teamed up, and sometimes they avoided each other. It was like a roller coaster.

_" People kept telling me they were sorry for Katniss. I can't stand it. "_

_" Well, it's hard to fake the fact we know she's still breathing. "_

_" I don't want to do it anymore, Peeta. Actually, I was thinking about a plan before you got here. "_

_" Did you come to anything? "_

_" Not really. But I have to make her pay for what she did. "_

_" We have to. Coin doesn't seem to be able to realize that Katniss helped the uprising. And even if she does, she doesn't care. I can't forgive that. "_

_" I think I'll do that interview thing. She will have to admit she lied. "_

_" Are you sure? Maybe she just won't use your interview and keep on going with that lie? "_

_" She needs my interview. " _Gale sighed.

_" She could still cut it. "_

_" You're right, I guess. "_

They kept thinking about a plan, but after half an hour, nothing came.

_" Maybe we could ask Beetee to give us some sort of an hidden camera. I'll go and see Coin with it. Then, we'll find a way to make every habitant of 13 see it. "_

_" This could work. " _Gale admitted.

Peeta smiled to Gale, and the boy smiled back. When it came to Katniss, when she wasn't supposed to be dead, they could really get along. They both had great abilities, and they will use it to make Coin pay for what she did.

**NDA: New chapter, and thank God, I'm not late this time! :)**

**I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I'll see you in the next one,**

**where things are about to get serious for Coin.**

**Bisous.**


	13. Chapter 13 : We need your help

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 13 : We need your help**

Gale and Peeta stayed on the bench and talked about how Gale should tell the President about her lie and how they know she's alive. Then, dinner time came, and Peeta couldn't be happier. They walked together to the canteen and sat at the same table, next to each other. When Peeta saw Prim coming, he couldn't help but jump on his chair.

_" So, how did it go?! "_

_" Pretty much, it was okay. " _Prim answered.

_" What did they ask? "_

Katniss' mom was gently rubbing Prim's head while eating her corn. Peeta was really happy to see her smiling. The last time he saw her do that, was when him and Katniss came back from their first Games. Seeing that smile again was really appealing.

_" How I lived now, that my sister was dead. What I thought about her shooting an arrow in the arena's forcefield, and how my mom was doing. "_

_" I see. "_

_" I'm pretty glad that it didn't last very long. They did multiple takes of the same questions. Maybe so they could get more angles for the montage. "_

_" That's all they asked, really? "_

_" No, of course. They asked me how things were in 13. What I thought of Coin. "_

_" What did you answer to that? "_

_" It was really hard for me to do that. I suddenly got angry. I just wanted to leave them here. But I calmed down and said that she was handling things quite well. "_

They kept talking about Prim's interview while eating. The ambiance at the table was better than it ever was, and Peeta was glad he got to this room with Finnick. His soldier's rank was totally worth it. Now, him and/or Gale needed to find Beetee to thank him, and to ask him about their request. Making this camera was going to take a lot of time, but the result would be worth the wait.

They were done eating so Peeta left to take a shower. He stopped by his room to take his pajama and headed towards the bathroom. There, he saw Jazz, leaving.

_" Peeta, how are you doing? "_

_" I'm doing okay. And you? "_

_" Pretty good I guess. I wanted to fight against you at the training, where were you?_

_" I'm not a soldier anymore. "_

_" What happened? "_

_" Oh, I did something that was forbidden, so I guess I deserve it. "_

_" Can you tell? " _The brunette asked, curious.

_" Not really. But you'll know soon, I promise. "_

_" Alright! Then, I'm going to sleep, I'm exhausted. "_

_" Good night. " _

The boy smiled and left, water falling on his shoulders from his curly hair. Peeta took his time in the shower, enjoying how his muscles relaxed under the warm water. He exited and thought he should head to bed too. But he really wanted to find Beetee. Where was is room located? He didn't know.

He roamed in all the levels, taking the stairs instead of the elevator. Fortunately, he saw Beetee, in the fifth level, rolling away from him. He started to jog and put a hand on his shoulder. The man stopped and turned to face him.

_" Hi Beetee. "_

_" Peeta, what are you up to? "_

_" Well, there's a thing I want to ask. "_

_" Go ahead then. "_

Peeta looked around them, but guards were everywhere in this level.

_" Shall I accompany you to your room? " _Peeta asked, still looking around him.

Beetee browed him and nodded. Peeta pushed his wheelchair, even though it was useless since it was an electric one. When the door closed behind them, Peeta backed up to it.

_" I'd understand if you refuse. It's risky. "_

_" What is it? "_

_" Well, I told you earlier that Coin lied to us about Katniss. "_

_" You did. " _

_" We want to record her while Gale tells her he knows about her being alive. "_

_" In which way can I help you? "_

_" This is where it gets hard. We need some kind of a hidden camera. Gale would have it on him and then we'll show the video to the District. "_

_" I can do that. " _Beetee answered, nodding.

_" Thank you very much! I mean, thank you for lying to the President, first! And thank you again for that! This means a lot to us, really. "_

_" I'm glad to help. But the problem is I won't be able to make it in less than a week or two. Coin wants me to do a lot of things, so I'll have to find time to work on that. And of course, I will have to be discreet. Because, if she finds out, I'm almost dead. "_

_" Take your time. As long as we have it, it's perfect. No need to rush and fuck this up. "_

Beetee adjusted his glasses on his nose and smiled. Peeta thanked him again and left, a big grin on his face. Now, he could sleep. And he really needed that. Then, he thought that they could need some of those interviews where Katniss appears. So the people of 13 would believe them even more. They could even share it before they get Coin on film. No, they couldn't. Coin would find out about what they're planning, and find a way for people of 13 to believe her and not the team they were growing.

He went to bed, and thought about their plan again. They had to have some meetings, like "The order of the mockingly". He laughed because of the Harry Potter reference and fell asleep, his heart lighter than any night he spent in the District 13.

He woke up at 8, going to have breakfast. He changed in his uniform, stared at the green walls, nostalgia making room in his mind and left before he got the need to cry. He sat at the table he shared with the Hawthorne and the Everdeen. Everyoen was here, eating eggs, soya and drinking apple juice. Prim seemed more relaxed than the day before, and Peeta appreciated that. He knew he had to take care of her, because she was the most important person for Katniss. And when they'll get her back, she'll be glad to see her sister doing well.

_" Beetee accepted. "_

_" Really? That's amazing! "_

Gale laughed and kept eating his eggs, giving small pieces of it to his younger sister. Katniss' mom didn't seem to quite understand that sentence, and Peeta knew he had to explain all the people present about the current situation.

_" We have a plan for Coin. But we can't talk about it here. Too many guards. "_

_" So where should we talk about it? "_

_" We'll need an empty classroom. Finnick and Haymitch have to be there too. "_

_" Well, let's meet right after breakfast. " _Gale added, looking forward to it.

_" Yeah, we could do that. " _

The question was where they were about to do that. And Peeta had an idea, his room would be perfect. They'll just have to find Haymitch and Finnick after they left the canteen. So he hurried up and ate his whole plate. He rushed towards the exit, waiting for the two men to exit the place.

_" Finnick, right here! "_

_" Oh, Peeta, how's it going? "_

_" Pretty good. Can I ask you to wait with me? "_

_" Hum… Sure. " _Finnick answered, kinda lost.

_" Thank you. "_

_The taller boy seemed lost, wondering why the other one was asking such a strange thing._

_" But… Wait for what? "_

_" For Haymitch to come. "_

_" Oh. What for? "_

_" You'll understand soon enough. " _Peeta explained, Finnick nodding.

The man exited the cafeteria, walking slowly and the boys didn't have trouble to catch him. The other members of the group joined them and they walked to the elevator.

_" Where could we find an empty classroom? "_

_" Well, obviously where they all are located. " _

_" Thanks for that, Haymitch. " _Finnick sighed.

They started to laugh and stopped at the level where the classroom were actually located, thanks to Haymitch and his accuracy. It didn't take long for them to find an empty one, since the lessons didn't start. Peeta let everyone enter and checked the corridor before locking themselves inside.

_" So, I have to keep you informed of what happened lately. First, we know that Coin lied to us about Katniss being dead. And none of us is going to forgive her that. So, with Gale, we came up with a plan. We will collect the interviews where we can see Katniss, and then Gale will go and see the President. He will tell her that we know about her lie. "_

_" But, will she just admit it like that? " _Wondered Peeta's ex mentor.

Everyone turned towards Haymitch, sitting on a chair in the most decadent way. Gale cleared his throat before answering the man.

_" I'll make her admit what she did. "_

_" And then? What will you do with that confession? How could you be sure she won't deny it in front of the District? "_

_" This is where Beetee comes in. " _Stated Peeta.

Haymitch looked at Peeta, not quite understanding what he meant by that. What did Beetee have to do with that?

_" Yesterday I asked him if he could help us with that. He is currently creating a hidden camera, that Gale will borrow when he'll talk with Coin. "_

_" Don't you think Coin will be suspicious and tip toe around the truth? "_

Peeta took some time to contemplate what his ex-mentor said. He could be right. Coin wasn't stupid, but this was all they had at the moment. And they didn't have a lot of time. They had to strike a blow fast.

_" You might be right, Haymitch. But this is all we can do. We have to try. Time is running out. "_

_" I guess we'll try, then. "_

Everyone agreed and Peeta felt more confident than before about his and Gale's plan. Beetee could lure the President, well at least, Peeta hoped so. All their hopes where standing on the man's shoulders.

_" I say we should meet every two or three days in order to keep all of you in touch about what's going on with Coin. And I have to say to everyone in here that we need your help. You're all important in this fight. "_

They all nodded, and Peeta knew it was important to tell them they had a role to play in this plan. He trusted all of them, and he knew he had been right to tell them about that.

He thanked them for coming and they left the room, going back to their duty. Peeta checked his bracelet. He had a mathematics lesson in 10. Well, he was already in

the right place. In the exact right place. He exited the room and waited in front of the door.

Things were about to go down, and hopefully, they will bring Coin down too.

**NDA: Here's the 13th chapter!**

**I don't like this one too much, but this had to be done.**

**I'm not even sorry about that Harry Potter reference (sorry, not sorry)**

**The next one will be better, I hope.**

**Bisous,**

**See you in the next chapter :)**


	14. Chapter 14 : Success is our only option

**Summary:**

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

_" But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! "_

_" Oh yeah, I know him. I do. He totally would. "_

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 14 : Succeeding is our only option**

Peeta was quite fine with what they learned in mathematics. He just wished they could teach some arts too. But it seemed like the District 13 only wanted performance, at any price.

The days went by, and the "Order of the mocking jay" met twice a week. After what seemed to be a whole year, Peeta walked into Beetee's room, following the man.

_" So, what are the news? "_

_" I'm finally finished with the camera. Just a few things to check and I'll give it to you. " _Beetee answered, his voice calm and steady.

_" Oh my god, thank you so much for everything Beetee, you've been amazing! "_

_" That's totally normal. No need to thank me. I just do what I think is right. "_

_" Well, let me know when it's done then? "_

_" Sure. I'll find you. " _

_" Good. Bye, then. "_

_" Yeah, see you later Peeta. "_

Peeta left Beetee's room, smiling and feeling full of energy.

He noticed a few weeks ago that there was a training center in the District, so he headed towards the place. He just stopped by his own room to take a towel. He stayed at the gym for an hour and a half. Then, he took a shower and decided to go sit on his favorite bench.

When he got there, Finnick and Gale were chatting, so he waved and sat next to them.

_" Peeta, what's new? "_

_" The camera is almost done. We might have it before sunset. "_

_" That's awesome dude! " _Finnick yelled, his voice echoing in the corridor.

The boys chatted until Gale and Finnick were called to their training. Peeta looked at them go towards the elevator and fell down on the bench. He closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. He relaxed, repeating himself that everything was going well. He actually fell asleep.

He had a dream about Katniss, when they were in the arena, on the beach. But when he said that nobody needed him, the girl disappeared, as if now, nobody needed him anymore. Then, he found himself in the hovercraft, screaming like a fool.

He woke up, shivering and sweating on the bench. He checked around him, and it took him several minutes to calm down. One look at his bracelet made him understand that he was going to be late at lunch. He got up and ran to the elevator. He tried to shake the memories of his nightmare away, but images of Katniss disappearing kept flashing in his mind.

_" Hi everyone. "_

Peeta focused on the people seating with him, pushing the ashes of his nightmare away.

_" Hey. We learned for Beetee. "_

Prim seemed totally fine, she gained weight and was looking pretty happy. As was her mother. Peeta really cared about their state. They became part of his family.

_" Good, isn't it? "_

_" Yeah. But with still need those videos, remember? "_

The girl browed to Peeta, and the boy understood what she meant. Thanks Prim for her reminder. They had to get those tapes. It was totally necessary for their plan to work. Would they really have to ask Beetee for something else? This wasn't fair for the man. He had nothing to do with Katniss, but yet, he was the one taking all the risks. Maybe they could find another way to get these recordings.

_" I guess I need to go back to that room. "_

_" But Peeta, she will totally take your High Ranking state away if you do that! " _Gale added, really fast.

Peeta was quite surprised when he heard the worried tone in Gale's voice. He didn't think the guy would ever fear for him. How strange.

_" What if Beetee deletes the informations of me passing by? "_

_" Do you think he could do that? "_

_" Of course he can. Making him do that instead of stealing the tapes is cleverer. Don't you think? Less suspicious for him, more safe. "_

Gale nodded. Peeta would have to be really fast and discreet this time. There was no way he could lose his place in the Conceal, but they had to get those tapes. So every single person in 13 will find out what kind of woman Coin was. The kind that researches power and justice in the wrong places with the wrong methods.

_" But how could I get these videos? I mean, just watching them won't make me leave with them on tape. "_

_" You could use the camera too. "_

Peeta contemplated the possibility, and it was the only one.

_" I guess so. "_

_" Just be careful. " _Murmured Katniss' sister.

The boy smiled to Prim, reassuring her. He was going to do all he could, he just had to. Succeeding was their only option. Or else, the consequences would be really awful.

_" I will be, I promise. " _

At five in the afternoon, Peeta was reading a book he found about the Games, in the District's library, and was totally into it. He learned more about the first idea they had of it, and it still didn't make sense to him. Making children pay was no use.

_" Peeta… I thought I'd never find you. Come with me. "_

The boy recognized Beetee's voice. So he pulled his book and left behind him. While the man was heading towards the room where he worked, Peeta was anxious, looking around him every three second. Beetee told him to calm down, but he couldn't help the fear he had to make him totally paranoid.

_" Here we are! "_

Beetee put his bracelet on a big metallic door, and tapped a long code. Then, he rolled in a corridor, followed by Peeta. At the end of the corridor, was a retinal scanner, so Peeta stepped back.

_" Beetee Latier. Access confirmed. "_

A double-door opened and they entered a huge room, full of machines, instruments, and screens. There, on a big table, was a tiny grey box.

_" So, this is the camera you asked for. "_

_" Wow, it really is small. " _Peeta said, in awe.

_" Yes, took me a lot of time to finish it because of that. "_

_" Beetee, thank you really much. "_

_" You're welcome. "_

The man smiled and explained to the boy how it worked. It was actually really simple. You just needed to click on the same button to start and stop the recording, so you had to be careful while borrowing it.

_" I'm really sorry, but there is another thing I need you to do. "_

_" Well, again? "_

Suddenly, Peeta was scared Beetee would refuse his request. He had all the rights to, but without his help, he was completely out of the Conceal. Tension was building, and an heavy silence was hanging around the two men. It's when the engineer started to laugh that Peeta relaxed again.

_" What can I do to help you? "_

_" I'm not sure you can do that but… I need to go back to the Computer's room. To film the interviews of Katniss, after she was declared dead. "_

_" Yeah, that makes sense. "_

_" So, if you can, and if you want to, could you erase my stopping-off time there? "_

_" I can do that. Just come back here when you're done. In front of the first door. "_

_" I truly don't know how to thank you know! We owe you so much! "_

_" I'm glad to help, I told you. A President shouldn't lie to his citizens. "_

_" Thank you so much Beetee. Well, I'll go and record it now, okay? "_

_" Sure. Be careful on your way. "_

_" I will be. " _Peeta said, bowing his head.

The man smiled and Peeta walked towards the exit, Beetee helping him in the process, since this room was really secured. Peeta crossed the last door and thanked the man once again. The door closed and Peeta looked at the camera in the palm of his hand.

This could be the answer to all their questions.

Peeta hid the camera in the pocket on his torso and took the elevator. He got down at the Commandment Center's level and suddenly got scared. What if Coin and Boggs were currently in the Conceal's room? He checked the Commandment Center's room. Empty. It was now or never. He entered the machine's room and locked the door, hearing this "click" sound revolve in the place.

He put his bracelet at the right place and the screen lit up.

_" Peeta Mellark. Analysis in process. "_

Once again, he saw his infos flash all over the huge screen, and waited for the process to end.

_" Access granted. "_

_" Search. "_

_" Please formulate your search. "_

_" Ceasar Flickerman's interviews. "_

The computer did a huge noise and Peeta wished Coin didn't lock any case for him. After his lie, everything could have happened.

_" Access authorized. " _Announced the mechanic voice.

_" Chronologic order. " _

_" Ordering in process. "_

Peeta had to wait again, and he saw the amount of interviews the man did. The work ended and he was surprise to see an interview they didn't see with Finnick the last time they came. He pulled out the camera of his pocket and took it between his fingers.

_" See interview one. "_

_" Analysis in process "_

Peeta stared at the "waiting" logo on screen. The thing kept turning and he thought it was over.

_" Access authorized. " _The computer finally said.

Peeta swallowed harshly while hitting the little button on top of the camera. Ceasar appeared, cheering up the crowd, that playfully and vivaciously answered him. Then, he announced the arrival of Katniss Everdeen, the girl who was on fire. This mention alone, broke Peeta's heart. He hated the past use in this nickname.

" There she is! Welcome Katniss, welcome! Sit down, please! "

She was wearing a black dress, simple but pretty. Almost no make-up on her face, except over her blue eyes, and a simple, straight ponytail in her hair. Peeta scanned her face as he did last time, and she seemed to be alright. Still, the look in her eyes was different.

" So, so… Katniss… What is happening? "

" Well… I heard about Peeta's death this morning… "

**NDA: Ha, ha! Here is the fourteenth chapter guys!**

**I enjoyed writing this one, to be true.**

**I know I leave you with a cliffhanger, but I promise that the wait won't be too long. I promise!**

**Hope you liked it, see you in the next chapter :)**

**bisous!**


	15. Chapter 15: Let's just be honest, okay?

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 15 : Let's just be honest, okay?**

Peeta instantly forgot he was holding the camera and fell on his knees. The hand with the camera was on the floor, and the boy was chocking on his breath. What did she just say?

" I really don't know how to process that information… I can't believe he's dead… It's not happening… It can't be happening! "

Katniss started to cry, and the crowd was silent, sobbing sound hearable here and there. Peeta looked up and saw Ceasar putting a comforting hand on Katniss' back, as she was breaking in tears. An strangled cry escaped his throat as he watched her fall to pieces.

" Come on, it's okay… It's okay… "

" How could you say that?! It's not…! He… He's dead, Ceasar!"

Peeta put his courage together and took his hand from the ground, filming the screen again. How could it be!? They thought he was dead? What was happening? He wanted to tell Katniss that no, he wasn't fucking dead, that he was still alive and fighting to get her back! He bit his lower lip so hard that it started to bleed, and tried to choke back the tears.

" President Snow said that he died yesterday night. We don't know how yet. "

" I don't… I don't wanna know! Just shut up! " Katniss screamed, her voice hoarse and begging.

An horrified sound came from the crowd as Ceasar pulled back his hand, seating back on his couch. He pulled out a joke to the crowd, but Katniss was still crying, her head hidden in her hands. Of course they didn't put a lot of make up on… These ass-holes sons of a bitch! This was not happening… It couldn't be… After Coin, Snow now?! What a fucked up world they were living in. Peeta tried to catch his breath but his hands were trembling, his bracelet knocking on the machine's electronic branches.

" If you wanted me to come here to say that I was not accepting the news, there you go! You have it! Are you happy now Ceasar?! "

" Let's take a deep breath and calm down over here, okay?! "

" Don't tell me to calm down! " Bit back Katniss, her hands closing around one of the armrest of the couch she was seating on.

" Hum, okay, okay, fine! Just, lower your voice, then… "

Katniss stopped screaming for a moment, and she looked as if she was wondering about something. The rage in her voice and eyes when she yelled again chocked Peeta.

" I'm sure it's the rebels! They killed him! "

" Katniss, please, calm down! We don't know that! "

" Oh, fuck you Ceasar! " The brunette screamed.

Katniss left the scene like a fury, running backstage. Peeta was still petrified. He clicked on the camera again, pausing the recording, chocking on his own breath. What were they going to do now? What the hell were they going to do? After a minute of silence and attempts to win his calm again, he thought that it wasn't that important. They could still save Katniss, even if she thought he was dead. But imagining what she was going through was unbearable for him.

Still, he had to film the rest, the other videos. He clicked on the camera's button again.

_" Video's informations. "_

_" Access authorized. "_

He filmed the date, that was three days ago. A wave of pain hit him again and he suddenly felt powerless. How was she feeling right now?

_" See interview two. "_

_" Analysis in process. "_

Peeta didn't stop the filming, and was still trying to catch up his breath. He looked up at the ceiling and clenched his teeth, trying to get a grip of himself. But the news was so huge… He wanted to run away, to escape this hell they were living in.

_" Access authorized. "_

" We're happy to have Katniss Everdeen once again on stage with us tonight! Make some noise for the girl who was on fire! " Chanted Ceasar Flickerman in a bright orange suit.

There was Katniss, again, in white pants and dark blue shirt. Peeta focused on the hand that was holding the camera. Tears of despair ran on his cheeks as he tried to stop the shaking of his fingers.

" Hello again Katniss. How are you? "

" Pretty much, I'm doing okay. "

" You have some things you want to talk about? "

" You're the one inviting me, Ceasar! "

" Yeah, right. Ha, ha! This girl has a lot of spunk! So, how do you feel? I mean, we didn't hear about Peeta for more than two weeks. "

" I'm very worried. As much as I was the first day. "

" You still have faith that he's okay? "

" Of course I do. I know he can handle himself properly. "

" Let's hope so too, folks! " Said Ceasar, cheering up the crowd.

The crowd screamed. Peeta was staring at Katniss, taking all her features in. He needed to remember that Katniss, and not the one that thought he was dead because of the rebels. He filmed the whole interview, the informations and did the same with the one he watched with Finnick. He hid the camera again, and put his bracelet off the machine.

He exited the room, checking the corridor way too fast, and headed to Beetee's working place. He knocked twice and after a moment, Beetee opened the first door for him. Retinal scanner once again, and Peeta followed him in the room. He sat in the first chair he found and hid his face in his hands.

_" Are you okay? What's going on? "_

_" Katniss thinks I'm dead… "_

_" Katniss thinks what!? " _Beetee asked, his eyes wide open.

_" I saw it… She… She thinks I'm dead… "_

He felt the tears stream down his face and Beetee came to put a hand on his shoulder, shaking it gently. They stayed like this for a moment.

_" I have to delete your passage in the machines' room. "_

_" Here, have my bracelet. "_

_" Yeah, but first, I need to enter the Commandment Center's system. "_

He heard a fast tapping noise, and after five minutes, Beetee was all over his bracelet with machines, working to delete his history.

_" If you want to talk about it… Go on. "_

_" I don't even know what to say… I have to let her know I'm okay! "_

_" You will, I'm sure of that. " _Beetee stated, calm again.

When Beetee was done, Peeta was sitting up, not hiding his face anymore, but he seemed totally down. His heart was once again having this pain he hated the most. He was so useless.

_" Okay… Now, it's up to you to make good use of these videos, okay? "_

_" Yeah. I will. Thank you. "_

_" When you're done collecting all you needed, come back here with the camera. I'll make a montage out of it and give it to you when it's done. Alright? "_

_" Sure. What you do for us is completely mind-blowing, I don't know how to thank you. "_

_" Oh, just succeed, it will be more than sufficient. And, if I can give you an advise, you should record yourself, a short video, with a date or something, and I'll try to spread it to the Capitol. "_

_" You really are the best, Beetee. Thanks. " _Peeta said, his hand on the man's shoulder.

_" You're welcome. Take care. Come back when you want. Just give it two knocks. "_

The man smiled to Peeta, and the boy answered with a weak one. His idea wasn't bad at all. He had to try it later. He sure would. Peeta walked until he reached the elevator, and headed to the last level. He sat on the bench, and didn't move at all for an hour. A hand on his knee woke him up from his daydreaming. Finnick was crouching in front of him, a slight smile in the corner of his mouth.

_" Hey there buddy. "_

_" Finnick… Hi. "_

_" Peeta. You look tired, man. "_

_" I just got the videos on camera, it's done. " _Peeta said, suddenly tired.

_" That's great, man! We just need to send Gale with it now! "_

_" Yeah. "_

_" Something doesn't seem right… Are you doing okay? "_

_" I'm not. " _Peeta answered, too fast.

Finnick had a worried face. He stared at Peeta for a moment and sat down next to him, putting a hand over his shoulders.

_" Did something happen? "_

_" Katniss thinks I'm dead. "_

_" What?! Seriously?! This goddamn Capitol! " _Peeta's friend groaned.

_" I know… And there's nothing I can do to change her mind about that. "_

_" Come on Peeta, we'll find a solution! " _Finnick said.

_" She was so sad… I didn't believe my death could affect her this much. "_

_" We talked about that before, remember? "_

_" Yeah, you're right Finnick. I'm sorry to be like that. But she was crying for real there. "_

_" It's because she cares about you. Now come on, if you stay here longer, you'll end up stuck on this bench. "_

Peeta cracked a laugh and followed Finnick out of the corridor. They roamed in the classroom's level to find an empty one. Then, Finnick stayed behind the desk, looking at the blackboard with a hand under his chin. He turned to stare at Peeta, sitting behind a table with hollow eyes.

_" So, let's reflect on that. Gale goes and record Coin admitting what she did… Now, we need a video of you saying you're okay. And then, what? "_

_" Beetee will make a montage out of it. When I recorded, you can actually see my session is open, so no need for a video of me talking shit. "_

_" Okay. And then, how do we call the people of 13 in the Grand Hall? We can't. Only Coin can do that. "_

_" We'll see that with the others I guess. "_

Finnick nodded and the boys stayed in the classroom for an hour to talk. Peeta felt a little bit better when they left to go to the canteen. There, he waited for Gale and Prim to come.

_" Did you get it? "_

_" I did. "_

_" How is she doing? "_

_" Well, she thinks I'm deceased. "_

_" What? Another of these stupid lies! "_

Gale sighed and ran a hand through his hair, tired of this mess. Prim just arrived and smiled to both boys. Her mom seemed pretty good, and Peeta didn't want to tell her that her daughter was sad because she thought he was dead.

_" Now, you need to see Coin, as soon as possible. "_

_" I don't think I'll be able to do it tonight. But I sure will do it tomorrow at the first hour. "_

_" We really need that confession. "_

_" I'll do my best. " _Promised Gale.

They talked about Gale's training, Peeta's time in the machine's room, but the boy avoided telling what he knew about Katniss. He finished his plate of carrots and mashed potatoes and left, heading to the showers. This night, he decided to go sleeping straight away.

Next morning, Peeta was still feeling uncomfortable. He couldn't help thinking about Katniss. She really seemed devastated and none of them could do anything to comfort her. He got up, download his schedule for the morning and saw he only had an english lesson at 10. He hoped Gale had time to see Coin.

When he didn't see him at breakfast, he guessed he was actually with her, trying hard to make her admit what she did.

Gale was stressed, his muscles tensed up in all his body as he walked towards the Commandment Center. He put the camera in the pocket on his torso, where he cut a tiny hole, clicked on the button and took a deep breath. He gave the door two knocks and Coin was behind it when it opened, she remained expressionless.

_" So, why did you want to see me this early in the morning? "_

_" Well, there's something I've got to talk about with you. "_

_" With me? Specifically? How strange. " _Coin asked, doubtful.

She took a step back, never losing eye contact with Gale and let him in. She followed him as he made his way in the reunion room.

_" Have a sit. "_

Gale nodded and sat. He relaxed when he saw the President do the same. There, he was sure the camera would be able to film her. She was cross-legged, her hands resting on her knee.

_" Then, I'm all yours, soldier Hawthorne. "_

_" Let's just be honest, the two of us, okay? "_

_" Sure. Go on, please. I have no time to waste. "_

_" I'm really sorry, but I got into your system, and searched for information about Katniss. "_

_" Well… This is not a good start at all. " _The president stated, rolling her eyes.

_" I know, I apologize. but I wanted to know what happened. "_

_" So? "_

_" She is still alive. "_

_" I'm sorry, what did you say? "_

Coin's head was slightly tilting on her left, and she was scanning Gale's feature, as if she was trying to know if he was telling the truth.

_" I know that Katniss is still alive. "_

_" I didn't know, I assure you. "_

_" You agreed on being honest, Mrs President. "_

_" I am being honest with you. "_

_" Why did you lie to us? What was the purpose? "_

_" This conversation leads nowhere, soldier. Now, if that was all you had to say, I'll ask you to leave. "_

_" I'm not going anywhere. " _Gale answered back, his jaw as contracted as it could be.

Coin's stare got deeper, and Gale clenched his teeth, afraid that he might have to leave her alone without any confession.

_" Just tell the truth. "_

_" I'm sorry, but I can't give you what you're looking for. "_

_" You knew that she was alive. Did you do that because you thought we'd fight harder? To avenge her? Clever move, I have to admit. "_

_" Soldier Hawthorne, this is over. " _Coin stated, looking upset.

Gale saw an expression on her face, and that was a really rare thing. She looked defenseless, and surprised. He was sure she was not wondering that he, between all the others, would go and tell her that he knew what she did. He had to keep going, to make her come undone.

_" No, this is not over. Just admit it, and I'll leave. "_

_" This is a thing I can not do. "_

_" I understand you want to push the uprising to its success, but lying about someone's death sure is horrible and heartless. "_

_" Are you saying that I'm heartless, soldier Hawthorne? " _Coin asked, her eyes burning with anger.

Her tone was totally frightening, and Gale was afraid he got too far. But he didn't back up, the others and Katniss were relying on him at the moment. This could change a lot of things.

_" I'm talking about the methods in here. "_

_" I just said what the infiltrated told me. Nothing more. "_

_" Couldn't you just check Ceasar's interviews? Or ask your engineers to do so? "_

_" This is not the point. Excuse me, but this is really getting nowhere. "_

_" Why are you not spreading the interviews where Katniss appears then? Why would you need to filter the things going on Panem's television? Why would you hide this from your people? Don't you think they deserve to know the truth? "_

_" Stop right here, soldier Hawthorne! " _Coin shouted, banging on the table.

She stood up, and Gale did the same. He was way bigger than her and looked at her behind her long eyelashes. She had this angry, almost demonic look in her eyes, but the boy was not going to give up. He was close to the end.

_" Snow lied to Katniss! He told her that Peeta was dead! Are you really the same kind of person?! "_

The President's eyes widened and she took a step backward. Gale didn't recognize her at the moment. It was like her mask was finally falling.

_" I don't think you are. Prove me that I'm right. " _Gale added, done with the shouting.

_" I don't know anything. "_

_" I'm sure of that, President. Katniss thinks Peeta Mellark is dead, right now. Snow lied to her, maybe to make her weak. I just thought you wouldn't do the same thing. I thought you were better than that, President. "_

_" I wouldn't do that. " _Coin stated.

_" But you did. And you know who said that Peeta was dead? "_

Coin didn't answer anything, but took a hold of herself, straightening herself back to normal.

" Katniss herself. " Gale slowly announced, insisting on the name.

Her features suddenly got harder. Standing straight and still, she was staring into Gale's eyes, her upper lip trembling in an awful way.

_" Just tell your people the truth, President. "_

_" I want you to leave. Right now. "_

_" Why don't you just admit what you did? Imagine if the news of Katniss being alive was going to be revealed to the District, without you saying that you did it to push the revolution? "_

_" Who could believe you over me? " _Coin laughed.

Gale sighed, his hands slowly closing into fists.

_" Because, what if all you said today was a lie, and that you just couldn't admit your friend was dead? "_

_" I saw her. She said Peeta was dead. This is a proof. " _Gale answered.

The boy closed his eyes for a moment. How did they get here? When he opened them up, she was smiling devilishly.

_" A "proof" you say? Let me laugh! This interview was recorded before her death. "_

_" I know that my friend, Katniss, is alive. Just say the truth! "_

_" Well, your "friend", ha ha. There's more than that on your side, right? But there came this baker's boy, ah? " _Coin said, an evil smile on her face.

_" Your words mean nothing. I know what I saw. "_

_" No, you don't! Her loss just made you lose your mind, soldier Hawthorne… I understand how broken you might be right now, but going to talk to me and say all of this nonsense, is really ri-di-cu-lous. "_

Gale's fists were as tight as they could be, and his jaw was clenched to its maximum.

At the same moment, Peeta was worried about Gale not showing up. Why didn't he give Beetee his recordings of Katniss before? Maybe Coin won't let them do what they wanted to, now that Gale talked to her. How stupid had he been?

_" You see, Mr Hawthorne, you were the one asking me to be honest, but are you being honest with yourself? I don't think so. " _Coin added.

Coin was now walking around Gale, that was trying his best to keep calm. He was staring at the ceiling, thinking about Katniss, and the group they had. They didn't need him to hit the President in the stomach.

_" I'm completely sure of what I saw, Mrs President, and you can not tell me otherwise. "_

_" You're just fooling yourself. She's dead. Leave the dead where they are. " _Coin said back.

Gale didn't know what to say anymore. He looked at her, that just stopped in front of him and took a deep breath.

_" You should relax and maybe ask a doctor to have a check-up. We have really good ones. Now, if you excuse me, I have a breakfast to eat. " _Coin added, putting an end to this argument.

She left, a big smile on her face. The door closed behind him and Gale hit the table with his fist. He had the control like two minutes ago! How did he fail at this? He was so close! He hit the table over and over again, and when he stopped, breathless, his hands were covered in blood.

_" FUCK! FUCK, FUCK, FUUUUUCK! " _Gale yelled, disappointed by himself.

He fell on his knees, holding his head. He closed his eyes, trying to relax and took the tiny camera in his big hand. He screamed again, hitting the table one more time and clicked on the button before pulling the thing in the pocket, covered in his own blood.

Gale walked to the bathrooms and washed his hands, still angry about himself. He totally failed. He knew he could have make her say what she did, but he just couldn't. He was useless. The others were waiting for him at the moment, and they were going to be disappointed. But no more than he was himself.

Now, the boy knew they had to be fast about that video. Faster than her finding a way to make everything they'll show look fake.

They had to be very, very fast now.

Gale looked at his reflection in the bathroom's mirror and couldn't stand to look at it. He exited the room and ran towards the canteen. He hoped they would still be there, waiting for him.

_" Oh, here's Gale! "_

_" Hi guys. "_

_" What happened to your hands?! " _Primrose asked, worried.

Prim jumped from her chair and looked at his articulations, with blood dripping from the wounds he just got. The girl looked up at Gale and saw that he was on the edge of crying.

_" What happened?! "_

_" I couldn't do it… I just couldn't! She reversed the situation and I found myself trapped! " _Gale answered, his voice unsteady and shaking.

Everyone's attention was focused on Gale, that got his hands back from Prim's hold. He just stared at them, trembling.

_" Peeta, here's the camera. Go find Beetee, and make this montage as fast as you can! There's not a moment to waste, okay? "_

_" Sure. I let you gather the people in the Grand Hall, okay? "_

_" We will, now go! " _

Gale handed him the tiny grey box and Peeta flew out of the cafeteria, running towards the elevator. He tapped on the level's button and wanted the machine to be faster. He stared at the blue numbers, changing too slowly in his opinion. Once he heard the "ting" that meant he arrived, he slipped behind the opening doors and ran, limping in the corridor. He gave Beetee's office two knocks, and couldn't help his fake leg tapping the floor repeatedly.

After several minutes, there was still no answer. He already gave a lot of knocking to the poor door, but Beetee didn't seem to be inside. Sure! He might be having his breakfast too! Peeta hit his forehead and rested it on the cold door. Hopefully, he will come to his office fast enough.

_" Peeta, were you expecting me? "_

_" Yes, I really was. " _The blond boy said, nodding.

Beetee looked at him over his glasses and tapped his code. There was this freaking scanner again. Too slow. They were in deep shit, and this montage had to be done now. He gave Beetee the camera as soon as the second pair of doors closed.

_" We're in big trouble. Gale didn't get any confession from the President. We need the montage right now. No time can be wasted. "_

Beetee didn't panic and simply nodded. He connected the camera to a computer with a transmission cable. Peeta saw the files appear on screen, and saw Beetee open a program. He couldn't help but look at what the man did.

_" You can sit if you want. I'll do it well, I promise. I'll make it short but full of proofs. "_

Peeta thanked the man and pulled a chair to sit next to him. The man was actually doing things so fast that his hand never stopped moving on the mouse.

_" You should film yourself with the camera that's in this drawer. "_

_" I don't need that. The District 13 knows I'm alive. And if you want to send it to the Capitol, you see my session is open when I film her interviews. And you can hear me too. So I guess that's enough. "_

_" Right. " _Beetee simply answered.

After a long wait, Peeta was bitting his nails, completely stressed out. Gale didn't give him details about how his meeting with Coin went. He hoped the boy didn't lost his High Ranking state. Beetee was still editing the montage, and Peeta didn't see the end of it. Pretty much, it seemed very good. Still, it wasn't done yet?

_" How many time do you need? " _Peeta asked, completely stressed out.

_" Three minutes, and it will be done. Relax, I'm on it. "_

Peeta sat back on his chair, looking at the screen where Beetee was cutting videos and ordering them, sometimes adding text. After a few minutes, Beetee sighed in relief.

_" Now I just need to put in on a memory card. There's a projector in the Grand Hall. You just have to take a right when you walk in, there will be stairs, take them, and there, you'll find the projector. Just put the card inside the slot. "_

_" Thank you so much. " _Peeta said, bowing his head.

Peeta was looking at the downloading on screen, and thankfully, it was pretty fast. Beetee took the memory card off and gave it to the boy.

_" Stop thanking me, it's okay. Now, go. "_

Peeta nodded, he sat up, and followed Beetee that unlocked the doors for him. He thanked him once again and started running again. As he was waiting for the elevator, he just wished they had enough time to gather the inhabitants of 13 in the Grand Hall.

**NDA: Wow, tough one! I don't really like the beginning,**

**but it had to be done ^^**

**What are your thoughts about what's coming next?**


	16. Chapter 16 : Here's the truth

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 16: Here's the truth**

The elevator just arrived and Peeta almost jumped in, tapping on the button corresponding to the level where the Grand Hall was. Coin was sure going to wonder why nobody was in the corridors, and she would find out what was happening. Hopefully, she would get there too late. Peeta exited the cabin and ran towards the Hall, that seemed almost full. He sighed in relief, but had no time to contemplate their job actually getting done. He looked on his right and saw the stairs Beetee was talking about, he ran towards it and climbed it. Out of breath, he entered a small room and saw the projector the man was talking about. It took him a certain time to find the right slot, but he finally put his hand on it.

_" There it is. " _Peeta sighed, releaved.

He put the memory card in, and a big blue rectangle appeared behind the stage, where Finnick and Gale were standing.

_" Thank you for coming! We have an important announcement to make! So please, listen and watch carefully! "  
__" What is this all about?! "_

Peeta froze when he heard Plutarch Heavensbee's voice. The man joined the boys on stage and Peeta could see they were having an argument.

_" What is this nonsense?! I will tell Coin about your behavior! "  
__" Please, don't! Just watch with the others! " _Begged Gale.

Plutarch looked at the crowd, impatiently waiting for something to come. He looked at the two boys again and nodded, warning them about what they could deal with if they were discovered doing a secret, not so discreet, meeting.

Peeta took a deep breath and clicked on the video file. It opened. First, it was totally black, then some text appeared.

" Dear people of District 13, you have been called here for a good reason. President Coin told you that Katniss Everdeen was dead, right? Then, watch this. "

Peeta recognized the interviews he filmed earlier, and a knot formed in his stomach. An horrified, yet surprised sound came from the whole crowd and Plutarch seemed totally speechless. Seeing Katniss on stage, normally chatting with Ceasar Flickerman, sure was surprising.

A montage of the two interviews with her being normal kept going until it stopped. People were talking very loud, discussing the reliability of the files. Peeta knew that wasn't all.

" I know some of you still think it's not revenant. But look at the videos' date. "

Then, appeared the video informations, with Peeta's crying in the back. The camera was shaking, but the date was still clearly readable.

" Yes, it was two weeks ago. Surprising, isn't it? "

_Then, came the last video, and strangely, Peeta felt anxious again, not wanting to hear what Katniss was about to say one more time. But all the District heard that sentence very clearly._

" I… I heard about Peeta's death this morning… "

Screams were coming from everywhere, and Peeta was sure they believed them now. They also were very angry about Snow and the Capitol. This was a better kick in the ass than announcing Katniss' dead, by far. This had the effect Coin wished her news would give. But hearing that sentence again was hard for the boy. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to relax.

Then, a surprising noise came from the back of the Hall, so Peeta glanced through the window of the projector's room. There, was Coin, with a bunch of guards all around her. She was peacefully making her way through the room, looking at the video still going.

" I'm sure it's the rebels! They killed him! "

Then, the date of the interview appeared, and it was over. Peeta took the memory card and put it in one of the pockets of his pants.

_" Well, well… Now you saw what our team did while The Conceal was looking for solutions… I have to be pretty clear right now. "_

The woman took a deep breath, eying the huge, angry crowd in front of her.

_" Here's the truth. As your President, I wouldn't lie to you about such a thing. I just said what the infiltrated told me. " _Coin stated.

Coin made a pause, looking everywhere in the Hall, as if she was looking for someone in particular. Then, Peeta thought about something really interesting. She couldn't hurt him right now if he helped her. He had to do that, so they would all be safe. Finnick, Gale, Prim and the others. So Peeta took a deep breath and walked down the stairs, going to the stage.

_" There was a transmission problem with them, recently. So this is why we didn't hear about her still being alive. " _Coin continued.

The boy got just in front of the stage, stopped by guards. Coin shot him a wondering glare and he smiled and browed her, asking her to go on stage. She ordered her guards to let him come, so he stepped on it, adjusting his uniform. He whispered something in her ear and she nodded before saluting the crowd and taking a step aside.

_" Hi everyone, I'm Peeta Mellark. Some of you must be wondering why the interviews never made it to the TV room, right? Well, there was a signal problem, and our engineers tried their best to solve it. Gale, right here, saw them and recorded it the day after it all started to work again. Our engineers finally worked it out yesterday night, so we can say that Gale was totally lucky. He was in the right place at the right time. As you realized, not a single Ceasar Flickerman's interview was possible to watch in here. But now, I assure you that every single one will be available. And about that infiltrated that told us Katniss was dead, I guess he wasn't really on our side. "_

The crowd calmed down a little and Coin sighed silently. Peeta smiled, he got a point. Saving her ass could give him back his soldier rank. Now they had a power over her, and that was completely fantastic.

_" Now, I will let your President talk again. " _Peeta finished, proud.

He saluted the crowd, and took a few steps back. Coin took the microphone in her hand and smiled to the boy in the back before looking at the people in front of her once again. Peeta felt really good, almost proud. The feeling was absolutely delightful.

_" Thank you for this explanation, Mr Mellark. I have to add that we can't warn the team that was working with this traitor. If I did so, the guy would just run away safely. I just won't take any of their information seriously from now on. "_

The crowd was now totally back to normal, believing their President again. Well, now they sure were going to be more suspicious.

_" Now, I think we should totally give a start to this revolution. Every soldier will have a double training, in order to go and find the mockingjay to get her back, or to prepare for the future fights we'll have to go through. And this, as soon as possible. Unfortunately, I can't send the whole army to the Capitol, this wouldn't be discreet. Boggs and I will find a solution. Now, please go back to your schedules. Thanks for your attention. "_

People started to leave the room, conversations getting totally wild about what happened. Peeta was still on stage, and he felt more confident than ever. Coin will have to accept every single thing he would ask for. In the end, only Gale, Finnick, Plutarch, Boggs, Peeta and Coin were remaining in the Hall, with a few guards.

_" I already hate what I'm about to say. But thank you. "  
__" They need a President to lead them. We didn't mean to do that to break you or bring you down, only to let everyone know that Katniss was alive. "_

Coin gave a forced smile to Peeta and pulled some of her straight hair away from her grey hollow eyes. The boy was relieved that he found the correct words. Of course they wanted to bring her down, she fucking lied about Katniss being dead. Someone doesn't just do that without some payback.

_" I think we have to go to the Commandment Center and talk about what we are going to do next. Boggs, please call Beetee and Haymitch in there. "_

The black man nodded and pulled out some sort of a tablet from the bag hanging at his right shoulder. So this was how the President called them overtime they were needed, with an electronic thing.

They started to walk in the hangar, sound of the shoes revolving in the empty place. Peeta let Coin go ahead and joined Finnick and Gale in the back of the rank.

_" Man, where did that come from?! That was amazing! "  
__" I don't know, I felt like this was the right thing to do. "_

Gale answered with a bright smile, his white teeth showing. Peeta smiled back, nodding. It felt great to have Coin under their power from now on. They had a huge advantage, and they were going to use it for good.

_" What do you think will happen next, Peeta? "  
__" I have no idea. But sounded like they were going to send a few soldiers to the Capitol. "  
__" Hey, maybe she'll give you your soldier rank back! " _Finnick pointed out, happy.

Finnick had his eyes wide open as he settled a hand on Peeta's shoulder, shaking it in all directions. Coin stopped and turned to look at the three boys. The smaller blond swallowed and smiled awkwardly. The President made a strange face and started walking again.

_" Don't be that loud, you idiot! " _Peeta laughed.

Peeta couldn't help but laugh while telling Finnick to shy down a little, and the two boys walking beside him joined him, laughing silently. Their group arrived in front of the elevator, and a guard tapped on the button, calling the machine. Coin turned to face the people behind her. She was cross-armed, and she didn't seem really comfortable, now that she was owing them a lot.

_" Having fun, soldiers? " _Asked Coin, annoyed.

The three boys looked up and stopped laughing immediately. Finnick cleared his throat as Peeta and Gale scratched the back of their necks. Coin rolled her eyes and turned again to enter the elevator. The journey to the level of the Commandment Center was totally silent and when they got there, Beetee and Haymitch were waiting in front of the door, not looking at each other.

_" Thank you for coming. Now please, enter and sit down. "_

They did so, Coin staying at the entrance. They settled down and Coin entered, leaving two guards outside while three others followed her inside. She didn't sit down, and walked in big circles in front of them.

_" We need to find a solution to get the girl back. And as I explained before, there's no way we can send all our men to battle Snow and his peacemakers. "  
__" Katniss. You can say Katniss. Won't cost you anything. " _Katniss' best friend said.

The President shot a dark glare at Gale, sitting at the far left, but didn't answer his attack. She sighed, closed her eyes and stopped walking. She turned towards the Conceal and smiled in an absolute hypocrite way. Peeta really didn't like that woman.

_" So, any ideas? "_

Everyone was contemplating the questions, and the huge amount of possibilities. But Plutarch was the first one to talk his heart out.

_" I find brilliant not to send a lot of our soldiers out there, in the wild. I think, the first thing to do would be to pull the Capitol down at our level. I'm not offending your presidency or your District at all, but they have hovercrafts waiting for us to come out. " _Plutarch stated.

Coin seemed angrier than she ever was, but she sighed, massaging her left temple as she looked at the ex game-maker. Gale was the next one to say something.

_" I know about the Nuts, and you must too. This is where most of their hovercrafts are located. If we take that down, it will be easier to get to the Capitol. "  
__" We have some allies working in there actually. But how do we take it down? It's highly secured, and it's a huge place. " _Coin stated, frowning.  
_" Bombing the cliffs surrounding it. Then, a whole side of the building will be out of work. We'll need to block other exits and keep one, to intercept our allies and arrest the others. " _Gale proposed.  
_" Sounds right. "_

Coin moved her head towards Boggs. The man nodded and started typing on the same machine as before. Did this man ever talk? Peeta wasn't really okay with that plan. What about the allies that wouldn't be able to make it out there? This was not fair to them.

_" Couldn't we send a message to all our allies in there before the bombing so they could leave before it? " _Peeta asked.  
_" Don't you think it might seem strange to the other people working there, to see a hundred men and women leaving at the same time? "  
__" They don't have to leave at the exact same time. "  
__" I'll think about it, Mr Mellark, thank you. " _Coin said, looking away from Peeta.

The boy sighed and ran a hand through his blond hair, not believing she would do that, warn them. Risks stopped her from saving Katniss when she saved him. And Katniss was the mockingjay, so the woman wouldn't care about some random allies in the Nuts, obviously. That was pitiful and sad, but he couldn't do much about that.

_" When this is done, we'll send 10 soldiers. I promise them allies along the way. "  
__" How will you chose them? Randomly? " _Asked Plutarch, in a rush.

Coin sighed and looked at Plutarch, the man that was always wondering about their young ,talented, healthy, soldiers. She didn't care much about them, they agreed to be soldiers, they passed the test and they went to their training. They were formed to get to fight the Capitol, so where was the problem after all?

_" I guess I'll have a few minutes with the ones volunteering, and go ask Paylor about their situation. And then, I'll pick those that I think would match them the best, helped by Paylor and the other trainers. "  
__" Fair enough. " _Plutarch stated.

The President of 13 shot a smile to the man, and started walking again. She took a long time before talking again, sometimes lurking at the people in the room with her.

_" Any volunteers in here? " _The president asked.

Three hands flee. Of course, Gale, Peeta and Finnick wanted to go to the Capitol. Gale and Peeta because of Katniss, and Finnick because of Annie, that was in there too. Coin simply nodded, and Boggs typed on his tablet-thing. Then, Haymitch slowly raised his hand. Peeta was chocked, but happy. He knew the President wouldn't agree to let him leave District 13, but the move was great.

_" Okay. You'll be called this afternoon, we'll talk there. If you know which soldier could be interested, don't hesitate. I'll inform Paylor too, she'll make an announcement at the beginning of your next training. "_

The grey haired woman made a pause in her explanation and turned towards Peeta, sitting at the extreme left of the group and room.

_" Mr Latier, you and your engineers will put back the Capitol channel on TV as fast as you can. "  
__" Sure, madam. "_

Coin nodded and took a time to think about any other thing they should talk about.

_" We'll start filming some quick spots in less than two days. Short scenes, pushing the rebellion to its real start. You'll get excused for every single lesson you'll miss. It's capital and obviously necessary. Our engineers will spread it to the Capitol then, to make them understand that we're not just hiding like fools. We'll show them we're better than that. Any question? "_

Boggs was still on his tablet, typing as fast as he could, and everyone was exchanging looks, wondering if they forgot about any important point.

_" Oh, I almost forgot. Mr Hawthorne, you're our best student in negotiations, military's strategy and physics. Would you mind working on a project with Mr Latier from now on? "  
__" What is it about? " _Gale asked, suddenly curious.  
_" Well, I wanted to keep it secret, but I guess now is the time. Mr Latier has been working on it since he got here. He's doing weapons for all of you, and not some random kind of weapon. It's the most perfect arm you could ever get. "_

The man in the wheelchair nodded and told the boys about their weapons.

_" Finnick will have a new trident, Gale bow and arrows, and Peeta, a special crossbow. Plus he's making bow and arrows for the girl too. For when we'll get her back. You'll see, it really is amazing. "  
__" I'm sorry but, why do you need me? I don't get it. "_

Coin looked at the boy that seemed puzzled. Peeta was smiling, because if he was still having a weapon getting prepared for him, it meant he was about to be a soldier again.

_" Mr Latier is inventing new bombs. They're not finished yet, and your advises will sure be welcomed. He's trying to find a way our enemy won't considerate it as a threat. But it'll have to be deadly at the same time. You'll need to find a way to use them while you'll be progressing in Panem. To create a strategy. You'll be seconded by Paylor in there, and you two will lead your team, plus the infiltrated that you cross roads with. "_

_" That's a lot of responsibilities. "  
__" It is. But I believe in you, " _Coin added.

A calm silence settled in the room while Gale was thinking about if he should or shouldn't start to work with Beetee on those bombs.

_" I accept. Seems interesting. "  
__" Great, fantastic. " _Coin stated, joining her hands together.

Coin smiled, and told everyone that they were free, not forgetting to remind them to check their bracelet as often as they could. Peeta, Finnick and Gale stayed together after the meeting, discussing how they could get the girls back without any problem. They had to be in a really secured place, and a few soldiers wouldn't be enough to get them out of their cells. It couldn't be that easy. Beetee rolled past them, heading towards the machine room, where he would put Ceasar Flickerman's interviews back in the District 13.

_" It's not going to be easy, but we'll find a way, " _Finnick said, bitting his lower lip.  
_" Yeah, since we won't be a lot of soldiers, it'll be hard getting Snow's peacemakers down. Coin talked about a dozen of soldiers, maximum. "_

Peeta nodded, a worried look on his face. They were totally right. How could ten soldiers, as trained as they could be, take three prisoners from the Capitol?

_" I think being so few could be helping. In the way that it will be harder for them to notice us. " _Peeta explained.  
_" Sure, but still, the two of us have been on TV a lot, people know us. It won't take long before they recognize us. "_

The smaller blond nodded. Finnick was right. Everyone in Panem with a TV post could spot them. He scratched his temple, trying to think of a way to get in the Capitol and not being stopped on their journey. Then, he got an idea. So random, but so obvious.

_" We'll have to get a diversion, somewhere to get everyone's attention away from us. It will be required when we get in the Capitol itself. "  
__" That's a brilliant idea. I think Coin will be okay with that, " _Gale said, smiling.  
_" And Plutarch will reject it. "_

All three boys laughed after Finnick's remark. He wasn't wrong, Plutarch Heavensbee cared about soldiers way too much to let a lot of them go to the Capitol to be a diversion. They separated when Peeta saw on his wrist that he had an economics lesson. He saluted the boys and hurried in his room to take his notebook.

After that, he got to the canteen, and had spinaches and fish. He was glad the District put some meat in their plates, every once in a while, and enjoyed every bit of it. It almost didn't have a taste, but still, it was good to have some. The whole cafeteria was arguing about what happened in the morning, with Coin and the interviews. It had never been that noisy, everyone still talking about this incident, and the President's weird behavior. Katniss' mom congratulated Peeta's intervention, and the boy smiled, moved by the compliment. When he finished his meal, he left with Prim, the girl holding a heavy notebook in her arms.

_" What is that? " _he asked, smiling.  
_" Oh, some kind of a diary. I started it before the 74th Reaping, and I update it a lot. "  
__" That's totally amazing! " _Peeta said, surprised and impressed.

The girl smiled, bringing the big notebook closer to her chest, caressing the leather cover with her slender fingers.

_" You know, I like to go back to this moment Katniss and you won your Games, "_ she said, looking up at Peeta. "_ I tried to portray the way she smiled when she saw us, with mom and Gale, it was an unforgettable moment. "  
__" I remember that day. That was really good being in 12 again. "_

The blond boy zoned out for a moment, remembering what Katniss told him the day before. How Haymitch told her she had to keep her act going. He remembered clearly the way his chest got heavier and his mind totally blank. She said that not everything was fake, but Peeta knew she did it to survive, not because she had feelings for him. And he could understand that. Still, it left an eerie taste in his mouth.

_" This page seems old now. I read it so many times… "  
__" I understand that. " _Peeta said, nodding.

Peeta smiled to her, and Prim smiled back, before she excused herself, explaining she had a medicine lesson. Peeta followed her braid, that was flying around her back, as she walked away. He knew this girl was about to do great things when she'll get older, and he was proud of that. Helping her was one of his priorities since he heard that Katniss wasn't dead. Before that, he was so depressed that he couldn't even take care of himself. He really wanted Katniss to come back and see that her sister was doing good in life.

The blond had nothing to do for the day, so he got to the library to continue the book about the Games that he started before. He got his book and headed to where the tables and couches were located. There, on a comfy grey couch, was Katniss' mom, apparently reading a novel. He smiled and walked towards her.

_" Oh, Peeta, please sit down! "  
__" Thanks. "_

Peeta did so, and opened his book, looking for his page. He found it and started reading, a hand under his chin. After a few minutes, he felt Katniss' mom look on him and turned his head towards her. She was smiling at him, gently, almost in a dreamy way.

_" Is there something I can do? "  
__" Oh well, it's not something you can do. But I wanted to thank you. "  
__" Oh, hum, about what? " _Peeta asked, suddenly lost.  
_" What you're doing for Katniss… And for my little Primrose too. She really likes you a lot, you know? "  
__" That's a really nice thing to hear. "  
__" She really does… " _Katniss' mom added, a faint smile on her face.

Peeta nodded and cleared his throat, not really sure of how he should answer to this kind of thing. He was not used to it at all.

_" She_ _lets me read her diary every once in a while, and she always believed in you. From the beginning, she said that you were someone with pure ambition and purpose. "  
__" Wow, I don't know what to say now… " _Peeta managed to answer.

The boy ran a sweaty hand in his blond hair, pulling them back as he smiled, embarrassed. Katniss' mom smiled again, and laughed slightly.

_" There is nothing to say. It's alright. She must really trust you a lot. "  
__" Even with all that happened recently? "  
__" Ha, ha. I know my daughter. In her words, I recognize myself, when I was younger and thinking about her dad. Not in a romantic way, but I could feel that she really appreciated you. "  
__" That's a lot for me… I… I really don't know what to answer. "_

The blonde woman laughed again, finally closing her book and setting it on her knees.

_" You don't have to say anything, I told you. But from the bottom of my heart, I really do thank you for what you do for my family. It's like you're taking care of your own. "  
__" To me, it's like you're all part of it, since mine… is dead. "  
__" I'm sorry about that, Peeta. Your dad really was a good man. "  
__" Yeah, he was my role model. He liked you a lot too. "  
__" I know that… I know. " _The woman said, smiling sadly.

Silence hanged in the air as Peeta had to swallow, thinking about his siblings again. He would never see them again, and would not even get to bury them in the right, conventional way. This was tearing down a part of his being. A warm hand settled on his forearm, and he looked up at Katniss' mom.

_" Don't worry, Peeta. We're here for you now. " _Katniss' mom said.  
_" Thanks… Thanks a lot. "_

The woman smiled, rubbing her thumb on the boy's arm, and Peeta felt a little bit better. Hearing those words felt comforting, in a way. He knew he couldn't really be part of their family, but he didn't need that to help them, and guide them along their way. Seeing them happy was far enough, he wouldn't ask for more.

_" Well, I'll leave the library now, see you at diner. "  
__" Yes, see you later, " _Peeta answered, nodding slightly.

The woman got up, and walked towards a bookshelf, putting her small one back in its place, and left, her golden hair shining with the lightning of the room. Peeta sighed and fell back in the couch, adjusting himself. He had to read the same sentence twice to focus on his book again.

**NDA: Oh my josh (new expression) here is the 16th chapter!**

**I thought I would never ever end it. So I'm truly sorry 'cause it's sunday...**

**This was a tough one, pfew.**

**Hope you liked it, see you in the next one :)**

**bisous.**


	17. Chapter 17 : Be afraid of what I can do

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 17 : Be afraid of what I can do**

Peeta read for a big part of the afternoon, sometimes lurking over his book at the people around him. Thinking about what Katniss' mom told him was giving him a feeling of comfort and it was like he finally found a place to come home when this war would finish. If he ever survived it.

Then, while he was at the half of one page, his bracelet shone and he saw that Coin needed him for those short videos the District was about to spread to Panem. This was kind of a relief for the boy, that worried about Katniss thinking he was dead, because of the rebels. Making a small appearance in one of those slogan video would make the girl realize that Snow lied to her to get her down with her will to make the Capitol fall.

He closed his book, remembering the page he was at, and pulled it back to the place it belonged. Then, he exited the library, saluting the woman at the entrance of the room. He walked towards the elevator and clicked on the level where the Commandment Center was located. In the machine, he ran across Haymitch, that was looking drunker than his usual self.

_\- Hey there baker's boy! You made a mess of Coin earlier! What a scene! Ha, ha_

The boy wrinkled his nose at the smell his ex-mentor released. He took a careful step back and put his hands up in front of him to enable him to come closer.

_\- Haymitch, you should take a shower and maybe… take a nap too._

_\- Don't you worry about me Peeta, I'm alright, just fine! Completely fine!_

Peeta smiled, then, he reached the level he was going to. He briefly saluted the man and left the elevator. He sighed, suddenly feeling tired as if he didn't catch a single hour to sleep for a whole week. He yawned and stretched out his arms above his head, shoving his fists in the air.

_\- Not sleeping well, Mr Mellark?_

_\- Not really, Mrs President. A lot of things are troubling me._

_\- You should relax a little bit… If you can._

Coin got a hollow expression on her face, but it was familiar to the blond. Seeing the President of 13 with a real face of disbelief or anger was totally unforgettable. Then, she turned her back on him and he followed her, and he was back in the same elevator. He rolled his eyes, thinking he spent too much time in the depressing, enclosing machine.

_\- Where are we going to film those sequences?_

_\- So much impatience, Mr Mellark… Just wait and you'll see the answer with your own eyes._

He didn't have to wait a lot to understand where they were heading, because Coin tapped on the "0" level, which meant he was about to see the sky and earth again. A genuine, childish smile rose on his face and he couldn't stop it from growing.

After a few awkward minutes in the machine, the doors opened on a long corridor, the same he came through when he arrived in 13, more than a month ago. Some of Coin's guards opened a huge door, and the boy was instantly blinded. He put a protective arm over his eyes and tried to keep on walking. He felt sand and rocks under his feet and felt as if he was forced to look at it. He laughed to himself as he rocked his boots over the texture.

_\- Can someone explain how and why there is no hovercraft waiting for us?_

_\- Madam, please excuse our delay. They are getting here._

_\- Be more careful next time._

_\- We sure will be Mrs President!_

The flight assistant saluted, bowing beside Coin as Peeta was staring at the sky, where the sun was slowly getting closer to the horizon. He wore a bright smile, feeling the wind blowing in his hair, the heat of the sun, the dreamy look of the clouds. He was so happy that he thought he could cry in an instant. Then, he had to protect his eyes from the little sand storm that the hovercraft now over his head was creating. The plane stopped and Coin told him to hush inside.

Peeta had no idea where they were going, and he was intrigued. He entered the hovercraft and sat on one of those seats he had been sitting on when he was heading to the arena. It felt strange to be there again, even though it was for a whole new purpose.

_\- Are we going to 12?_

_\- Good guess, Mr Mellark. We'll get there very soon._

After half an hour, the plane slowed down and Peeta knew there were getting to his District. That was a strange feeling, when he knew it had been destroyed by Snow's firebombs. He felt his stomach starting to ache and closed his eyes, inhaling deeply before he undid his seatbelt. The hovercraft stopped and Coin invited him to step out of it. His valid leg was shaking and he made his way out of it. His eyes were wide opened when he realized what he was looking at.

_\- Oh my god… _

He was standing on the Grand Place, where Gale got beaten and whipped about 6 months ago. But there was nothing around. The ground was covered in ashes, and the need to puke grew strong inside of him. Those were the rests of the poor habitants that couldn't escape the Capitol's attack. He could be stepping on his family right now. He had to stop walking and crouched down, his head in his hands, chocking on his breath.

_\- Mr Mellark, we have to hurry._

He nodded, and got up as fast as he could. A sort of black soot was hanging everywhere around him, and he wanted to push it away with his hands, but he knew that it was completely useless. He felt as if he was walking in a cemetery. A cemetery made of people he knew, of people he loved. Of his friends, his brothers, his parents. How did they get there again?

He followed Coin and two camera-men, and he knew where they were going. To his parents' bakery. He was limping behind them, looking around him, not recognizing all the houses that used to be there anywhere. Only ruins were standing, clues of a past District. After a few minutes, they got to the bakery, on the back of it. Well, there was almost nothing left, just a piece of their broken oven and some walls, barely standing.

_\- Okay, start filming now._

Peeta heard Coin giving orders to the camera-men but he didn't really care about it. He just stopped and looked at the tree in the back of his garden. He swallowed hardly and just stared at it, his mouth open in a silent cry.

_\- This is where… _

He rubbed his cold hands together and frowned, trying to push away the vision of Katniss being tortured by Snow's puppets. He looked up for a moment, looking at the clouds above his head and focused on the tree again. His vision was kind of blurred, but he tried to ignore that detail.

_\- Katniss… What am I supposed to do? I should have saved you this day… And maybe it was a good idea to escape, I should have accepted. So we could be safe, together, somewhere in the woods._

Coin was in the back, smiling. She was proud of how the blond was doing. She knew they didn't need to give him any advice before they started filming. He was totally perfect at what he was doing. Peeta's eyes were watering, and he felt his throat dangerously getting thinner and sharper, as he was on the edge of crying.

_\- This is where I threw bread at Katniss… I remember it. She was so thin, covered in tears. My mother… She screamed at me and hit me because I burnt some bread. And I decided to give some to Katniss. After that… I couldn't stop thinking about her. I remember we were at school, and she was glaring at me sometimes. And soon after I gave her that bread, she picked up a dandelion… I will never forget that._

He started walking and got on what was left of the stairs of his bakery. He sat down and brushed some tears away from his eyes. He exhaled loudly and put his arms on his knees, one hand hitting the iron that replaced his lost leg. The metallic sound travelled to his ear, making him surge a little bit.

_\- We can't give up now. We can't just… Admit that innocent died and keep on doing nothing. We will make the Capitol and Snow himself pay for what they did. _

He looked up and stared at the camera standing a few meters away from him. Feeling as if something was trying to push him higher, to make him accomplish something right at the moment.

_\- President Snow, this is who you claim to be. What kind of president kills his citizens? There is no way you are my president. Look at what you've done… _

He opened his arms and looked around him, desolation running through his veins as he saw nothing he could see during his childhood. Then he slowly stood up, steady and full of new found motivation.

_\- This is exactly how you start a revolution, Snow. Killing some of your people, is giving the others the strength, and the will to make you fall. I thought you were cleverer than that. But this gives us a point. We're better than you can ever wish you'll be. Remember that._

Peeta walked where he could in front of his bakery, sometimes brushing his fingertips on the stones that were covered in ashes. He looked at the floor, dirty and black, covered by these dense ashes.

_\- People of Panem, look at what your president does. Just open your eyes, we're not a country anymore, not after what we've been through! Forcing our children to go in an arena to kill each other? What a dumb idea. President Snow, _**you**_ are the one that started this rebellion. Now, watch what you launched by yourself. Because you can be sure of one thing. If we burn, you burn with us!_

Silence was hanging around the blond, and he was out of breath, a slight smile at the corner of his lips. He couldn't move his eyes from the objective of the camera. It was like a magnet.

_\- And pretending that I am dead, is stupid. I am very alive, and you should be afraid of what I can do._

Silence settled again and Peeta ran a tired hand in his hair as he sat down again. He wished that Coin would leave him alone and not ask him for over videos. As she was talking with her filming crew, Peeta thought he was about to have to do shoot some other scenes.

_\- Great! Cut!_

Coin was smiling, completely happy with what she recorded. Peeta sighed and sadness quickly came back, making his fingers tremble. The President clapped her hands for an instant and told the camera-men to wrap and go back to the hovercraft. They did as they were told and the silver-haired woman walked toward Peeta, stopping in front of him, cross-armed.

_\- That was impressive, Mr Mellark._

_\- No need to thank me… Can I just have a moment before we leave?_

_\- Sure. But if you're not here in 10, we'll go without you._

Peeta nodded and Coin walked towards the plane with her filming crew. The boy sat on the stairs and covered his face with his trembling hands. His heart was beating like crazy, and he felt numb as adrenaline seemed to ran out of him, calming him down. He looked back at the tree, that was covered in brownish dying leaves. It made him think about Katniss' situation, in the Capitol, and his throat tightened. He couldn't wait for this video to come out so the girl could acknowledge the fact that he was still alive, and fighting for her and justice.

He stayed there several minutes, tears calmly going down his cheeks. He couldn't wait for Coin to send them to the Capitol and get Katniss back. He needed that. And of course, Katniss needed it, urgently.

He remembered Coin telling him the hovercraft would leave without him so he forced himself to get up and walked back to the Grand Place. Coin was standing in front of the plane, one of her foot tapping the ground stressfully.

_\- You sure did take your time, Mr Mellark._

_\- Sorry._

He didn't look at her and stepped in the hovercraft. He sat and fastened his seatbelt. He spent the whole journey to 13 with his eyes closed, trying to convince himself that Katniss will be alright when they'll get her.

They landed in District 13 and Peeta could finally have a little time on his own. He got down at the first level and sat on "his" bench. He lied back on it, and inhaled deeply. He hoped they would have news of Katniss soon. Being that worried wouldn't help anybody. What he needed to do was to collect himself and focus on their plan.

He didn't have a lot of time alone because diner time just arrived. He stretched out, and took the elevator once again. He yawned as he washed his hands in the bathrooms. He then walked to the canteen and took his plate, full of fish and green beans. Prim seemed in a really good mood and Gale was not present. Maybe the boy was with Beetee?

_\- Where were you this afternoon Peeta? I didn't see you around at all._

_\- I was having those intervews Coin wanted to record._

_\- Oh, did it go well?_

_\- Kind of. I guess it was alright._

Primrose smiled and took a fork of beans before she talked to the boy once again. The words she said calmed Peeta a little bit.

_\- Actually, I was absolutely sure you did good. But I did mine for nothing._

_\- Don't say that, you've been great._

_\- And it's all thanks to you. _

_\- You totally could have done it alone, you're clever._

The blond girl laughed and ran a hand in her hair, styled in a ponytail.

_\- I wonder when my new one will be scheduled._

_\- I think you won't have to wait too much. And if you need any advice, don't hesitate. You know where my room is._

The blond girl nodded and ate again. Peeta smiled, happy to see the girl doing so well. She was healthier than ever, and that warmed up something inside of him. Katniss' mom didn't say anything, but she patted her daughter's head quite often.

When he was done, Peeta saluted everyone and left, heading towards his room, needing a shower. He took his pajamas and a towel before going in the first available cabin, whistling peacefully.

A sigh of relief left his throat as warm water crashed on his shoulders. He looked down, and realized the water covering the palm of his feet was pitch black. He looked up and tried not to take care of it. He used the common soap bottle to clean himself and dried himself up. Then, he walked out of his cabin, threw his dirty uniform and got out in the corridor.

_\- Hey, Peeta! How are you doing?_

_\- Finnick. I'm doing good and you?_

_\- Pretty much, I'm okay. What's up?_

_\- I had the interview today._

_\- How did it go? I mean… The questions could have been kinda… you know._

_\- They didn't ask anything. They just dropped me in 12 and let me talk._

Finnick's eyes were wide open at the mention of District 12, and he took a step closer to Peeta, shaking his shoulder with his hand.

_\- Oh my. Sounds like a rough time._

_\- There is nothing left. Just ruins and ashes… _

_\- I am truly sorry._

_\- There's nothing we can do about it now anyway._

Peeta's head fell down and Finnick took him in his arms, holding him tightly. Peeta smiled at the attention and hugged the boy back. He was really happy that he survived the Quarter Quell with him, he knew they could count and rely on each other. And in times like these, Peeta was aware that it was priceless.

_\- Thanks… _

_\- Nothing to thank me about. If you want to talk about it, let's meet on our bench after my shower._

_\- Maybe tomorrow. I guess I just need to get some rest._

_\- Are you sure? I won't take long._

_\- Yes, but thank you for the invitation. I guess I'll see you tomorrow, have a good night._

_\- That's fine by me. See you then!_

Peeta smiled back at the blond and headed towards his room. He fell on his bed instantly, stretched like a starfish. He stared at his green ceiling and fell asleep almost instantly.

When he woke up, he changed into his sad and gray uniform and exited his room, less tired than ever since he got in 13. It was time for breakfast so he got to the cafeteria, his hands in his pockets. He sat down and Gale was here again.

_\- Hey Peeta, what's up?_

_\- I've been in 12. There really is nothing left._

_\- I don't even want to imagine what you saw…_

_\- So I won't tell you._

Gale didn't say anything to that and gave one of his eggs to his smaller sister, that giggled when she saw it in her plate.

_\- And hum… You saw Beetee yesterday, right?_

_\- Yeah, exactly. We are making progress in all that touches strategies._

_\- That's good news. What are you working on, if you can tell?_

Gale shacked his head and Peeta withdrew himself, not really welcoming this refusal from the guy. He opened his watter bottle and drank half of it in one go, staring at Katniss' best friend in the eyes. Gale sighed and looked at his family before looking back at the blond in front of him. Oh right.

_\- So, do you still go to casual lessons? Or is it cancelled?_

_\- Depends. I still have to be learning negotiations, mathematics, physics and military strategy. For the other subjects, I go if Beetee doesn't need me._

Peeta nodded, chewing on his last egg. Then, they chatted for a while, waiting for Gale's family to leave the canteen to talk about Coin's project for Gale and Beetee.

_\- The only thing I can say is a thing you know. We're working on new bombs, totally innovative and destructive. The Capitol stands no chance against it to be honest._

_\- Isn't it too risky?_

The blond checked if nobody was too close to hear, as this work was supposed to be Top secret.

_\- By risky, I mean isn't there a big probability for us to kill allies by using those bombs?_

_\- Of course we can kill innocents or allies. But there is no bomb that can choose its target, especially if it's in a fight. How can you not kill people on your side if you send a bomb during a battle? There's no way you can._

_\- So maybe we could use those bombs when we're in a bad posture._

_\- You think this could be a good idea? I was wondering about it. Think about it. It would mean we're an inferior number of soldiers or that they have an advantage. Sending it at this moment could totally ruin our intervention. Using it earlier could spare some lives, even if it takes some of our people._

Peeta knew it made sense, but he couldn't accept that. Sending bombs during a fight and killing our allies? Maybe our friends? No way he would do that. But he didn't want to start an argument, not in the cafeteria, and not with Gale, so he nodded and frowned, as if he was contemplating Gale's explanation.

_\- And I'm absolutely sure that Coin will love what we are planning. She sure will._

The blond swallowed as Gale saluted him and threw his tray away. Peeta stayed at the table alone, thinking of a way he could make Gale's mind change without opposing his first idea. That was going to be tough, he knew it.

_\- Peeta, you're daydreaming!_

_\- Oh, hey Finnick._

_\- Please tell me you were thinking about our date!_

_\- Our what?!_

Finnick's face fell and Peeta thought that he was about to cry. But after a few seconds, the taller blond was laughing, tapping on Peeta's shoulder as he crouched and put his free hand on his belly.

_\- I was joking handsome._

_\- Yeah, sure. Ha, ha._

_\- So, still going on that bench, aren't we?_

_\- Sure. Let's go._

Finnick crossed his hands in the back of his neck and smiled. He nodded to the blond and exited the cafeteria like that, saluting the cook on his way. Peeta just followed, smiling to himself because of Finnick's joke. A little laugh couldn't kill anyone after all.

They sat next to each other on the same old bench and remained silent for a few instants, enjoying the silence in the level of District 13.

_\- It was quiet like this too in 12. Of course, there was nothing left. Just a bunch of ruins and too much ashes flying around us._

_\- Not a good thing to see… This is not fair._

_\- Those ashes… I knew they were just parts of people I knew. I felt so disgusting, walking there. It was covering everything, and only a few bricks were standing in town. District 12 is a ghost town now. But it's still home to me._

_\- I know how you feel. You want Katniss to feel home again when she'll be back. I get it, Peeta._

Peeta's words were stuck in his throat after what Finnick just said. It was exactly that. He found the perfect terms to explain what he couldn't explain. So he nodded silently and put his elbows on his knees.

_\- Yeah. I hope she will feel home. That's all I want._

_\- She was different in the last interview. What do you think is happening in the Capitol?_

_\- She didn't seem hurt… But this wasn't the Katniss I met years ago at all. I didn't recognize her in some parts._

_\- We have to get them back Peeta. The sooner, the better._

_\- We must do it._

They didn't speak for several minutes, just enjoying their understanding of each other. Peeta felt as if he had kind of a new brother, and sincerely hoped Finnick felt the same about him. He trusted the boy whole heartedly.

_\- What if Coin refuses to let me go?_

_\- Why would she do that?_

_\- To protect me, because I have this ability to talk to people, to make them believe in every word I say if I want to._

_\- Sure... But you still can pressure her, she will let you go then._

Peeta didn't answer. Maybe it could work, but he didn't know if forcing the President of 13 could really help him after all. He didn't want her to despise him. He wanted her to trust him, to give him responsibilities so he could save and protect Katniss.

* * *

**NDA: I'm so, so, so sorry for the awful delay!**

**I was busy with my university business that I couldn't focus on IIWIYS.**

**But I'm back for good guys!**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter,**

**and see you on friday for chapter 18!**

**Bisous.**


	18. Chapter 18 : Pathetic

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 18 : Pathetic**

Peeta sighed and looked up at the blond sitting next to him. What he suggested could work for sure, but there were a lot of other things to count in the plan. After a minute or two of dead silence, the smaller boy spoke.

_" I don't really know, Finnick. Imagine Coin totally hating me, wanting me dead. This is not what I want. I guess, if she doesn't accept after my begging, I'll give up. "_

_" But you want to go there and take Katniss away from Snow yourself, don't you? "_

_" Of course I do. I want to be there for her. I want to help. But if the President doesn't allow me to go to the Capitol, I'll have to deal with that decision. "_

_" Guess you don't have another choice anyway… " _Sighed the taller blond.

Finnick pulled his lips together and sat back on the bench, his head on the top of the green furniture, eyes closed. Peeta looked at him and smiled. He really appreciated the boy being here for him. He just wanted to be able to give back too. Since the beginning, he had always been the one needing help, and he didn't have the opportunity to do the same for Finnick.

_" And what about you? "_

_" Me? Oh, I guess she will let me go. "_

Peeta didn't add anything as Finnick looked back at him, smiling. His blue eyes were full of what Peeta would describe as little sparkles. Slowly, Finnick's smile faded away, leaving a worried expression on his young face.

_" But I was recently thinking about Johanna. We didn't see her at all in any interview. Don't you think it's weird too? "_

_" You're right… Maybe they are torturing her. I hope not, but we can't be more unsure about that. "_

Finnick nodded silently as he settled in the same position as Peeta, with his elbows on his knees. They stood there, and Peeta felt the tension building. They both wanted to go to the Capitol as soon as possible. There was literally no time to waste in 13 anymore. All they did was going to lessons and training. But wasn't all of this made to fight Snow?

_" I'll go and try to convince Coin to let us go like, on thursday. " _Peeta said, nodding to himself.

_" Yeah, you should do that. Five days is already too much to me. "_

_" But for the President, it means we have to prepare the soldiers harder and faster. "_

_" I'm sure it does. " _

Finnick laughed in a half-hearted fashion and Peeta knew the guy wasn't doing okay at all. He was just hiding it behind great walls. He wanted to make them crash down. He wanted to know what was really happening in the blonde's mind.

_" How do you feel, Finnick? "_

_" How I feel… Completely helpless and desperate. Seeing Coin doing nothing as the girls' situation get worse each day is really upsetting me. And I'm not even talking about Gale's strange behavior! "_

_" What do you mean 'strange behavior' ? " _Peeta asked, intrigued.

_" Don't you see it Peeta? He keeps licking Coin's feet, everyday, all the time! I just can't stand it! Can't he just realize how wrecked and fake this woman is?! I mean, come on, he needs to open his eyes! She is just using us to get to her goal! "_

_" I know how she is, because I had to fake a lot of things during the Games. I tried to warn Gale as smoothly as possible. You can see how it went. "_

The taller blonde rolled his eyes in disappointment and sighed noisily. Peeta cracked a laugh and ran a tired hand through his hair. Gale did not trust him at all, so it was logical that he didn't notice any of his warnings. Whatever, he had to keep trying.

Peeta's bracelet shone and the boy sighed when he saw he had to go to a mathematics lesson. He excused himself to Finnick before he got up.

_" Well, if you want to come to my room, you can. " _Peeta said, smiling.

Finnick smiled in response and got up too. Peeta didn't expect what came next. He found himself in a warm hug. He smiled and hugged the boy back. They stayed like this for a while then Peeta had to let go, his lesson starting in a few minutes.

He got to his classroom and tried to focus on what the teacher had to teach him.

One hour and a half later, he exited the room, stretching and yawning.

_" Peeta, how are you? "_

_" Doing okay, and you little Prim? "_

_" I'm not little! " _Prim said, hitting Peeta on the shoulder.

They both laughed, Peeta feeling a bit more awaken than before.

_" Well, I'm kind of exhausted. I never stop, but it's good like it. "_

_" Are your medicines lesson still interesting? "_

_" It keeps getting better. We're learning all the bone structure, there's a lot to learn. "_

Peeta smiled to the girl, and noticed the leather covered book in her hands. It was really important to her if she took it to her classes.

_" Is your notebook getting filled up? "_

_" Yes. I really want to put every detail in it, so I decided to always bear it on me, everywhere I go. "_

_" That's really cool. " _Peeta stated, impressed.

_'"Thanks. Can we go to lunch together? "_

_" Sure. When do you finish? "_

_" In an hour. So come pick me up, okay? " _Prim asked, smiling.

_" That works for me. See you later. " _

Prim smiled and nodded as she started running. She hit a man in the chest and Peeta jumped to get to her.

_" Can't you watch your steps kiddo?! I've got ink everywhere on my shirt now! "_

_" Please calm down. She didn't do it on purpose. "_

_The blonde closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down._

_" Now, give me your hand Prim. "_

_" She's just stupid! Look at my shirt! It's never going to get off! " _Yelled the angry man.

_" Just go to the laundry room and you'll find a way to wash it now. You'll have more chances to get it back to normal if you go now. "_

The girl got up, her face bright red. She clinged into Peeta's arms and locked her tiny arms around his waist, trembling.

_" I don't care! I'm going to have troubles with President Coin now! Are you glad?! "_

_" President Coin won't really care about a dirty shirt. And please, stop screaming, you're just making it worse and it won't make the ink go away. "_

The man clenched his fists and took a step closer to Peeta. The boy stared into his brown eyes, not even moving a single bit. People were now around the three of them, staring at the scene, murmuring things between each other.

_" Please get a hold of yourself. She has a lesson starting right now. "_

_" What, an english lesson? I don't give a damn shit about what she has to do! She will come with me and explain herself in front of the President! "_

Peeta sighed and brought Prim closer to him, gently rubbing her head. The guy in front of him was a wall, you just couldn't have a collected, responsive conversation with this type of people. His mother was the exact same.

_" Please accept her deepest apologies. Now, excuse us, she has to go to her anatomy lesson. " _Peeta said, his voice calm.

And not expecting any answer, Peeta started to walk, Prim still stuck in his arms.

_" Where is your classroom? "_

_" Just a level up… "_

Peeta nodded and headed to the elevator, not taking care of the man screaming in his back. Prim was sobbing, and once they stepped in the elevator, he let go of her and bowed so he could stare at her right in the eyes.

_" Hey, look at me… Come on. " _Peeta said, in a sweet tone.

_" I'm… I'm sorry! I didn't want to do that, I swear! "_

_" You don't have to apologize to anyone. And surely not to me. You did nothing wrong, okay? "_

_" But he was really angry at me! He wanted to take me to the President! "_

_" Trust me, she doesn't care about this kind of thing. "_

He smiled to Prim and caressed her tail, hanging over her left shoulder, like Katniss used to wear it. The girl looked up, her eyes red, tears starting to dry on her cheeks. She nodded shyly and Peeta shacked her shoulder as they exited the elevator and he walked by her side until they got to her classroom.

_" I'll come and pick you up, remember? " _Peeta said, smiling.

_" Sure, I do… "_

Prim made a small smile to Peeta and headed towards the room where a teacher was waiting by the door. She stopped just before she entered to join the other students.

_" Peeta…? "_

_" Yes? " _The boy asked back.

_" Thank you. "_

She disappeared from his sight as he smiled. Prim sure was a sensitive girl, but he knew she would be strong one day, just as her sister. Thinking about Katniss again made him whimper. He walked away from the classroom, sighing.

_" Oh, good morning Beetee, how are you? "_

_" Well, perfectly fine. We were able to send a very quick flash of you to the Capitol about one hour ago. "_

_" Wow, that was really, really fast! " _Peeta almost shouted, impressed.

_" Who do you think I am? "_

Peeta swallowed hardly but Beetee started laughing, patting his forearm.

_" I'm glad you're happy about that. "_

_" It means that Katniss knows I'm not dead… If she saw it by the way. "_

_" I'm sure she did. Snow must have been ordering for her to stare at Capitol TV so she would start to believe everything they say in there… "_

_" I'm not so confident about that. " _Peeta sighed.

_" I'll be for you then Peeta. Well, now if you could please excuse me. "_

_" Yeah, sure. Thanks again. A lot. "_

_" You're welcome, but there's no need to say that. I did it for all of those people that suffer everyday because of that man. "_

_" Fine. " _

Beetee bowed his head and made his wheelchair turn away from Peeta. The blond finally left the corridor to go to the library and read his book. He settled in a comfy sofa and kept learning about the history of the Games. It was quite interesting even thought it was still a disturbing thing to pull off from a President. How hungry for power and desperate did you have to be to have this kind of idea and think it would be okay?

" This is insane… " Peeta murmured to himself.

He flipped a page and wondered why nobody stood up against it sooner. Why did they have to wait for almost a century to try to make a change? He knew it wasn't possible in the beginning, by the end of the war. Obviously, everything was damaged, and the population that was still alive was postally injured and facing the fact that the, oh so great, Capitol won.

But why so long after its beginning? If he was a parent, Peeta would have done anything to stop the Games, not willing to take the risk to hear his child's name at the Reaping.

Other than that, Snow brushed away the most important part of Panem's population. Making them live in horrible conditions; hungry, dirty, ashamed, sick and poor. He knew most of the inhabitants were totally shocked about that fact, but nobody tried to stood up for a real change. Why did they need to see to be really upset?

Apparently something that looked like what Katniss started without really wanting it. By trying to save Rue, by making her some kind of funeral in the arena. Also with her pulling out those berries, that meant a different thing for everyone. But also with what Peeta did himself, trying to save Katniss with a made up love story.

The fact they needed a hopeless love story was not making sense in Peeta's mind. Seeing kids killing each other wasn't enough, but having those two tributes from 12 "falling in love" was? How wrong was the society they lived in?

He didn't read any other line because every TV in 13 started to work and stopped the District's lifeline. Peeta pulled down his book and stared at the screen over one bookshelf, where Ceasar Flickerman appeared, as bright as always.

" Hello everyone… a very important show is about to begin! You should definitely stay tuned on Capitol TV, because in less than 5 minutes, Katniss Everdeen will be here by my side to answer all of my questions! Isn't that absolutely won-der-ful?! Yes, I know, it is! "

Peeta's mouth was hanging wide open, and he felt his available leg shaking, even thought he was still sitting on the sofa. A struggling noise ghosted its way out of his throat as he stared at some Capitol commercial about a new shampoo. He couldn't decide if he was happy or sad to see her on screen once again.

The last time she showed up on TV, she was totally out of her normal self, blaming him for his actions. He then spent sleepless nights trying to figure out what he did wrong, or what things she could have interpreted in a bad way.

He tried to calm down, closing his eyes and focusing of what Finnick told him, that maybe she was just in a bad mood, or forced to say these kind of things. Snow would absolutely be the kind of man that could do that just to get some sort of agreement and support from its citizens.

After what seemed to be ten minutes of stupid commercials, the Capitol seal appeared once again, and a lot of people were now grouped around Peeta, staring at the huge screen in front of them.

" Thank you for waiting folks! I'm honored to welcome the wonderful Katniss Everdeen, the girl who was on fire! Let's make some noise for her please! "

The crowd cheered up and screamed, making Peeta shiver. He was already looking for the girl and finally, she walked on stage. She was wearing an elegant white dress, totally neutral and plain. There were no straps and it stopped just over her knees. She had almost no make up on, just a slight touch of black over her eyes and deep red lipstick. Her hair were tied in a bun, two locks flying over her face as she walked towards a smiling Ceasar Flickerman.

" I'm happy to welcome you on this stage once again miss Everdeen, please have a seat! "

" Thank you Ceasar. " Katniss said, her face neutral.

Silence settled in the crowd as the library was almost frozen in time, not a single noise coming to Peeta's ears. Katniss settled down softly and stared at one the camera, smiling in an horribly fake way. It made Peeta pull back from the screen and scratch the sweet material of the sofa under his nails. Was she also looking like this when they had those interviews just after they escaped their first arena?

" So Katniss… I am pretty much sure that you heard about the big new, here in Panem? "

" What are you talking about exactly? " Katniss asked, staring at Ceasar.

" Oh come on, let's be straight forward about that interview, shall we? "

" Then, why don't you ask the question properly? "

Ceasar laughed and pulled out a cheeky line, making the Capitol live watchers laugh and clap their hands loudly. Peeta sighed, recognizing the Katniss he knew.

" -Katniss, Katniss… I am talking about the boy… The boy with the bread. "

The boy stood still on the sofa, his breath stuck in his heavy, tortured throat as people around him started to look at him. So she knew… That sounded quite comforting for now.

" Oh yeah, I know. He's not dead. How ridiculous! " Katniss said, laughing.

" What do you mean Katniss? "

" Ceasar, he was clearly claiming that the rebel's cause was the good choice! Coming from him, I find it completely ironic. Don't you? "

Okay, maybe it wasn't that comforting at all. Peeta wanted to disappear from the library, to move and go to the highest level of the District, and never exit it. But his body refused to move, his mind wanting to watch the full interview. Something was wrong with him, that was for sure.

" I mean, I didn't think he was uncomfortable in here while we were preparing for the Hunger Games, or during the Victory tour. It was like… his home, you know? "

" Uh-oh! Folks, don't you want more details?! I sure do! " Ceasar yelled in his microphone.

The crowd was totally crazy, and as the screaming and clapping of hands grew louder, Peeta felt sicker and sicker. He couldn't believe what was happening before his eyes, live on TV. This was not Katniss. He ignored what they exactly did to her, but there sure did something. And it was making him want to puke. Humans can be monsters, devils.

" Tell us more Katniss, everyone in the country wants to hear your point of view! "

" You saw him. He was all smiles and jokes. He was like a fish in a water in here. I am sure I wasn't the only one to notice that. " She made a pause, taking the time to look at the audience. " Peeta totally knew how to play with words, he sure did. You can never be sure when he's actually telling the truth. He's an excellent actor, that's it. "

" What does it mean for you, personally? " Ceasar asked, a frown on his forehead.

" Well, I just don't know what to think to be honest. I don't know what was true and what was not, considering our relationship. "

" But you two seemed really close during the Games. We need explanations Katniss! "

" I trusted him for sure. He was absolutely lovely, you could tell. His will to protect me really made him root inside of me. " Katniss smiled to herself. " But now that he's away, I don't know anymore. "

" Is that it? The end for the star-crossed lovers?! " Ceasar screamed.

A general horrified sound rose in the huge crowd that was staring at Katniss and Ceasar. Peeta was speechless, petrified as words made their way to his brain. He was trying to denying it hard, not wanting to break down in front of so many inhabitants of District 13. But what Katniss was suggesting was just the worst thing to hear.

" I can't say it for now. But seeing him taking a stand for the rebel's cause is totally… Pathetic. "

**Oh my god I'm so sorry!**

**I'm awfully late, once again.**

**I had to complete things for my university, and to settle things for my future apartment, so I was kinda really busy!**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter, and see you in the 19th. :)**

**Bisous.**


	19. Chapter 19 : You can give up

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 19: You can give up**

Peeta was standing still on the sofa, staring with shocked eyes at Katniss, that was making a disgusted face on TV. Ceasar nodded for a while and cleared his throat.

" When you learned that Peeta was dead, you told us that you thought it was the rebels' fault. What do you think now Katniss? "

" I think he got into trouble wherever he is with the rebels. I didn't think he was one to do that, but it seems like he started. "

" Started what exactly? " Ceasar asked.

" Being a liar. Being so good at acting that people will start to loose their trust in him. "

The blond boy was now on the edge of crying, his lips trembling constantly as his arm's muscles were clenching regularly. He didn't know if he was angry or sad. All he knew is that not a single person would like him anymore, and nobody would ever believe in what he says again. And that was a huge problem.

" You know, I was in love with that boy. He was so gentle, so shy and full of respect. You can't blame me about that, right? "

Women started to scream in the hall where the interview was set, and Peeta didn't care about it. His brain was stuck on what Katniss just said. In love, with him. How could it be? He thought it was all acting, as she did in the first arena. Could she be lying again? Peeta didn't know anything anymore. He was completely lost.

" He was really… touching and caring. I never met someone like that before. Someone that was willing to protect me at any cost. " Katniss swallowed with difficulty, getting more comfortable on the couch. " I felt really safe with him. "

" It's sad to learn that now you doubt about that. "

" He saved me, there's no need to deny that. But was it really because of love? Wasn't it all just a strategy to stay alive? "

" There's no way to know it, Katniss. But from our point of view, he seemed madly in love with you. "

People started blowing and screaming, and it sounded like hell to Peeta's ears. What was he supposed to do? When they'll get her back, how was he supposed to act? Because if he did what his heart told him to, he'd just be himself, and show her how he felt. But now, he didn't know if it was a good idea, since Katniss didn't believe in him anymore, and thought he was a completely different person.

" Yeah I know that. I fell for it by the way. "

" Well, you fell for him actually. " Ceasar said, laughing.

" I can't really say that anymore Ceasar. I felt for the trick, for his trick. Being gentle and all. It was part of his act I guess. "

" Don't look into it too much. "

" I can't help it. I am so lost right now. I just wish I could talk to him. "

Oh how badly Peeta wanted to talk to her too. He'd give anything for a phone call.

_" But then again, there would be no way to know if he's sincere. "_

_" Well, let's move on, okay? "_

_" Yeah, sure. "_

The Capitol seal appeared again, for a few seconds, and Peeta was abnormally aware of all the people looking at him. He hated them all, he hated the Capitol for what they did to Katniss, he hated himself. He tried to imagine a world where he would be dead, and Katniss could be happy in 12, with her family and Gale. Maybe he shouldn't have survived his first Games. Maybe he was meant to die in that arena after all.

" So, Katniss… Do you have anything to tell us? "

" Well yeah. Peeta was in a spot from the rebels, right? Well, there is a little thing I'd like to say to these people. "

" What is it? We'd love to hear about that! Don't we?! Sure we do! " Ceasar yelled, cheering up the audience.

" I just want to tell them that they should give up now. There's no need for Panem to start a war. Too much blood has already been wasted. You can give up. There's no shame to do it. You'd be saving a lot of lives, and people would be thankful for that. "

That was definitely not Katniss. Peeta wanted to fly to the Capitol and kill Snow with his bare hands. To make him pay for all he did. He didn't know what happened to the girl he was looking at, but he was going to find out for sure. And all the guilty people would be paying with their useless lives.

" Well, that's a great message. A message of peace. And I hope people will hear you out Katniss, I really do. "

" Thank you. " Katniss said, in the same monotone Coin was using.

" Well, now is time to end up this show! Yeah, it's pretty sad because there's a lot of things we'd love to know. You can send your questions to Katniss to the address that appears down below. Some of them will be selected and answered live in our next show! Until then, take care and see you soon folks! "

Capitol seal, Capitol music, and black screen. Peeta was trying to make a move, to live this library full of angry and judging eyes. It took him several minutes to do so, as the sea of people was getting closer to him, talking to him, asking him questions he didn't want to hear. Combined with the commercials that started running on television, Peeta was going numb, his ears whistling hard.

He got up, his legs shaking under his weight, and he started to walk, pushing people on his way. That earned him some disagreement sounds, but he couldn't care less. He hurried up to get into the elevator and tapped on the highest level button, letting an heavy sigh escape his mouth as the heavy doors closed.

He sat on the bench and started to cry, feeling completely hopeless. He knew he had to pick up Prim in less than thirty minutes, but he didn't know if it was a wise choice for the girl. With was Katniss said about him, he knew everyone would despite him, and spit on his back all the time. Involving Prim in all of that wasn't fair. He'll excuse himself when he'll get to diner, explaining the situation to the little girl.

Yeah, for sure, he should've died in that arena, instead of slowing Katniss down and making her weaker because of his wound. He was just being a burden for everyone. His existence made no sense anymore. He had no family left, and the only person he cared about hated him. Things escalated really quickly, and he had no power over it.

_" I knew I would find you there buddy… " _Said a calm voice.

Peeta looked up and saw Finnick standing in front of him, an apologizing look on his face. He tried to manage a smile, but just couldn't do it. He washed his tears away and made room for the blond to sit next to him.

_" I am aware you had a hard time. I saw it too, you know. "_

Peeta didn't answer and stared blankly in front of him, his mind lost in the abyss of desperation. He was useless. Completely useless. He couldn't get a single thing done. He failed at saving Katniss.

_" I am not going to walk away from you. I know better than that. And Katniss doesn't think all that she said. "_

The smaller blond looked at the taller one, with hollow eyes. They were red because of him crying, and the blue was so dark that Finnick pulled back a little. He then settled a hand on Peeta's tight, clutching it in his palm.

_" You were right Peeta… They did something to her. It might no show outside, but she is different. The Katniss I met would never agree with the Capitol. " _Finnick continued.

Silence hanged around the two boys, and Peeta sighed slowly as he closed his eyes and lied back on the bench.

_" You might not believe when I say that Katniss doesn't think what she said, I get it. But this isn't Katniss. The real Katniss knows better. "_

_" We don't know a lot of things about each other. And she was right saying that I made up a love story. But I didn't do it for me. I wanted her to go back to 12, and live. I didn't think it would end up like that. "_

_" We'll get her back, and then, we'll do something. "_

_" I don't know Finnick… I thought a lot during this interview. " "_

Finnick nodded slightly, totally understanding how Peeta was feeling. When you didn't know anymore who you were because of what people say about you. It was a tough situation to handle, and it wasn't surprising for the boy to see Peeta struggle at the moment.

_" I came to one thing. Nobody needs me. "_

_" You told her that, remember? "_

_" How do you know? " _Peeta asked, tired.

Finnick laughed a bit and smiled to Peeta, removing his hand from the boy's tight and turned completely towards him as he answered his question.

_" Peeta, I spent a lot of time in the TV room, and they kept showing those recordings of the Games. I saw what happened on the beach, like most of the country. "_

_" I almost forgot they were filming at the moment to be honest. "_

_" I understand that. We're much more interested by staying alive than by the million of people looking at us. "_

_" I remember I said that. Of course, I do. " _Peeta sighed.

_" Well, she answered that she needed you. And if you died, she would go out of her mind. I'm sure about that. "_

_" Not anymore. " _Peeta bit back.

Finnick rolled his eyes, upset that his friend didn't want to accept the truth. if they got Katniss back and healed her, she would be devastated if she learned that Peeta was dead. It was so obvious, but yet Peeta didn't want to admit it.

_" It would be so much better if I was dead. "_

_" Don't say that. There are people here that care about you. "_

_" Maybe. But these people will get over it someday. "_

_" I won't. " _Finnick answered instantly.

Peeta seemed lost for a moment before Finnick hugged him, crashing him between his arms. He smiled a bit as tears rolled down his cheeks. Even his own parents didn't tell him this kind of thing before the Games, and when he got back, they didn't really seem to care. His dad did a little bit, but he was also caring about Katniss' come back. The feeling was totally staggering to him, but such a relief at the same time.

_" It's nice hearing that, Finnick. "_

_" I'm just speaking my heart out. "_

_" It doesn't change the fact that I make things worse. Just imagine me being dead, and Katniss getting rescued from the arena with you. "_

_" Peeta, I don't think we can really picture what would have happened. " _Finnick said, shaking his head.

_" Just listen. I'm dead, you're saved with Katniss. What is the total? Everyone is happy, yeah, totally. I'm just a burden for everyone. "_

Peeta laughed, and it was a laugh of an insane man. Finnick was scared, thinking that his friend was starting to have a depression. There was so little he could do to help him. But he was going to try anything he could to give support to the boy sitting next to him.

_" Since you got here, Primrose and her mother smile Peeta. I don't think you realize how wonderful that is! Before that, Gale told me he couldn't manage to get them eat half of their plate. You gave them hope! Now, they believe that we can get Katniss back. And that's a lot, honestly. "_

_" All the credits don't come from me. You helped me and without you, I would be a mess for sure. "_

_" That doesn't make you less important Peeta. Don't say you're useless, cause you are not. " _Finnick said.

_" You have always been the one helping, I did nothing for you. I'm ashamed. "_

_" Come on, don't be. I know I can count on you. "_

Peeta smiled, a part of what Finnick said was true. But still, it didn't add to the fact that it would better with him being dead.

_" Lunch time is coming, let's go, okay? "_

Peeta simply nodded and followed Finnick into the elevator. He told him he had to pick Prim, so the blond guy accompanied him. The girl's eyebrows flew when she saw then, and ran into Peeta's arms, holding him in her slender arms.

_" Hey little Prim, how was your lesson? "_

_" Pretty good. But we had to stop to watch TV. "_

_" Oh, I see. "_

_" You shouldn't notice what Katniss said about you. i didn't recognize my own sister. "_

_" That's kind of you. "_

_" It's not nice, or kind, or anything like that, it's the truth. I believe in you. I always did. "_

Peeta slid his hand on her head, and caressed the blond locks, making Prim smile brighter in her arms. Finnick was wearing a big smile too, happy to prove Peeta right about what he said. A lot of people needed him, and he shouldn't think otherwise.

_" How about we go to diner? I'm kind of hungry! "_

_" Sure Finnick, let's go. "_

They had to part since Finnick sat at a different table. Peeta noticed all the inhabitants of 13 staring at him in a lot of different ways, but he didn't take care of it. Instead, he started talking with Gale and Prim.

_" Training had been really tough today. My muscles are all tensed up, I'm a mountain of nerves right now. "_

_" Oh really, what did Paylor want you to do this time? "_

_" We started doing simulations, and I didn't think it'd be that hard. "_

_" Wasn't Finnick there? " _Peeta asked, curious.

_" No, he was excused for the day. " _

Peeta moved his mashed carrots with his fork, lost in his thoughts as he nodded to Gale. Katniss' supposed-to-be cousin gave spoonfuls of the mixture to his sister, that giggled every time her plate wasn't empty anymore. The hushes around the cafeteria made Peeta paranoid. He thought that every conversation was turned towards the show he saw. His head was hurting, the ache getting worse at every second.

_" I don't feel so well… Guess I'll go to shower and sleep right away. "_

_" Maybe I can help you? "_

_" It's okay Prim. I think a little sleep won't kill me. "_

_" If it gets unbearable, don't hesitate and come to my room, I'll get you some medicine. "_

_" Thank you. See you at breakfast then. " _Peeta said, smiling and patting the girl's shoulder.

Prim nodded and kept eating her soya steak. Peeta threw his plate and exited the cafeteria. Each step he took further from the room made his headache lower. He sighed of relief and stopped by his room to take a towel and his pajamas.

He was surprised to see Jazz in the bathroom, brushing his teeth as water dropped from his curls.

_" Peeta. " _

_" Jazz. " _

There was an awkward tension between them, and as Peeta settled his towel on top of the shower's door, he heard footsteps behind him. He turned around, and Jazz's face was no good news. The brunette was frowning, staring at him right in the eyes.

_" Was the girl on fire right? "_

_" What do you mean by that? "_

_" Are you really like she said? Manipulative and acting all the time? " _Jazz asked, his head tilting to his left.

The blond rolled his eyes. That really was a stupid question. As if he was going to answer " Yes, she was totally right! I'm an asshole that loves using people for his own good by lying and acting 24/24."

_" I don't care about what everyone thinks, you know. I stopped bothering about that. It doesn't mean a thing after all I've been through. "_

_" That doesn't answer my question Peeta. "_

_" I'm not. But I guess that I could lie to you by saying that. Let's be honest. Even if I told you I wasn't like that at all, you'd still have that suspicion that I'm trying to be someone else. " _Peeta stopped and laughed. "_That I'm trying to persuade you that I was being my normal self and not acting. So what can I do? "_

The brunette simply nodded, making cold water drop on Peeta's bare foot.

_" I don't know you after all. "_

_" That's the point. Now, I'm going to shower. Do you want to keep discussing that while I'm under the water? "_

_" No, that makes it for me pretty much. " _Jazz said, shaking his head.

Peeta smiled in a half-hearted fashion and entered his cabin, closing the grey door behind him. He turned the faucet and waited until the water was warm. He relaxed as much as he could under the hot stray of water, but couldn't stop thinking about Katniss' words. About the smiles she faked and the ones she didn't. What was happening in the Capitol to make the girl change that much? He remembered the first interviews, and that was a whole other world. What happened? What kind of threat did Snow find to enjoy himself?

When he finished, he turned off the water and dried himself up. He was surprised to see that Jazz was still here, discussing with Finnick.

_" Oh, Peeta. "_

_" Were you having a discussion about me? "_

_" No, no! That's not it. "_

_" You don't have to lie, Finnick. There's no point. " _Peeta sighed, rolling his eyes.

Finnick gave an apologizing nod and turned towards the mirror to brush his blond hair. Peeta stepped and stopped next to him, getting his toothbrush out of his small grey bag.

_" Peeta, I'm sorry. I shouldn't judge you. I even told you before that I did not know you. So how could I know if was Katniss said was right? "_

_" I understand. If I was in your shoes, I would act the same. "_

Peeta knew that all the people that were now giving him side looks didn't know anything about him and were just buying anything the Capitol, Coin or anyone important would say. That was normal in that kind of society. He thought it was stupid to fall for these informations, but anyway, now he knew he shouldn't bother about people talking shit about him.

_" Can we start by being friends, then? "_

_" Sure Jazz. I'd really appreciate that. " _Peeta said, nodding.

_" I'm so relieved… " _Jazz blurted out, smiling.

The three boys laughed. Peeta knew it was useless blaming Jazz for acting this way, so it was okay. And he could really use friends at this moment of his life.

_" It is kinda sad that you're not allowed to train anymore. I have no more crossbow buddy. "_

_" I think Coin will soon give me my soldier rank back, don't worry about that. I'll ask her tomorrow. "_

They stayed in the bathroom another ten minutes and Peeta excused himself. He was exhausted as a lot of things happened in just one day. He just wanted to lie down on his bed and relax a bit. Think about a way to get Katniss to believe in him again when they'll get her back. There had to be a way to do so.

Wasn't there?

**NDA: Hey guys, here's chapter 19!**

**Once again, a tough one, but I had the inspiration for once!**

**I hope I will be able to give you the other one next friday.**

**I have a lot to do, including a writing contest. But I'll do my best!**

**I'm moving out of Paris next month and starting college, so I hope I will still have time to write for you.**

**Thank you for reading me and see you in chapter 20.**

**Bisous. :)**


	20. Chapter 20 : I'm no help in here

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 20 : I'm no help in here**

After twenty minutes under his uncomfortable grey sheets, Peeta thought it was time to stop pretending that he could fall asleep. A lot happened during the day, and every time he closed his eyes, it was like he could see Katniss on stage again, saying the same things over and over.

He slowly opened his blue eyes and stared at the green ceiling, so appealing and terrifying at the same time. Nothing in the District or in the life he was currently leading was helping him to forget about Katniss' situation, even for a minute.

The boy rolled on his small bed and forced his eyes closed once again. The way she was behaving on TV hours ago was so unsettling that Peeta had doubts about her state. And after a lot of thinking, he finally tried to see the bright side. Maybe Katniss was acting, forced by Snow and his government. This wouldn't be surprising. It was totally possible that she had to say those things in order to stay alive, it made sense. After all, it was not really a bright side, but a grayish one.

When Peeta opened his eyes again, it was morning, as the tiny clock on his cupboard said. He had to hurry up, get dressed and head to the canteen, then he would have to find Coin and send her some of his requests. He didn't know by now if he should talk about the Capitol intervention or if he should wait a little bit longer.

Both Finnick and Gale surely wanted him to ask as soon as possible, but the boy didn't know if it was a good idea nor a good time. First, he had to get his soldier rank back.

He didn't shower, not having any time for that at the moment, and ran to the cafeteria, where Prim was seating with Gale only. He saluted them as he pulled down his tray.

_" You have awful bags under your eyes Peeta. Did you sleep? "_

_" I did catch a little sleep, but it's hard. " _The boy sighed.

_" I understand. I barely take a nap every night. "_

Even thought Gale looked healthy, it wasn't surprising that he couldn't fall asleep at night, too preoccupied by Katniss' situation. Prim didn't say a word, munching her buttered toast lazily.

_" What about you little Prim? "_

_" I'm okay… I just had to read all my notes for a test I have this morning. So I stayed awake for hours. "_

_" You're really dedicated to your medicine lessons, that's a good thing. " _Peeta said, smiling gently.

The girl nodded and focused on her plate again, enjoying the yellow color of her egg. Peeta smiled and ate too. The rest of the breakfast was really calm, the cafeteria being empty at such an early hour. But the boy had to make sure Coin would be in the Commandment Center, and not eating in her quarters. So right after he finished, he excused himself and threw his tray away. He walked away from the cafeteria and took the elevator, yawning every two seconds.

He walked out of the machine and stretched as he made his way to the Commandment Center. There was light in the room, so someone was in there. He gave the massive door two strong knocks and waited. They opened on Coin, cross-armed in front of him.

_" Peeta Mellark… Something I can help you with? "_

_" President, I had to talk with you. "_

_" I expected you sooner. Come in. " _ Admitted the President, in her usual monotone tone.

The blond boy nodded and made his way in the room. A lot of papers and notebooks were settled on the main table, but Coin was alone in there. What was she working on? He tried to read the headline of a sheet of paper, but the President was fast enough to push it away. She put it in a file and closed it noisily. Then, she turned and crossed her slender arms on her torso.

_" So, I guess you want your soldier grade back? I will give it to you soon. "_

_" Hum, yes, that was what I wanted. "_

_" Was there something else, Mr Mellark? " _Coin asked, tired.

Should he be asking her to be part of the squad that will intervene? He wasn't so sure about that. Maybe that wasn't the moment. But the occasion was good after all. His brain was a mess, and he didn't know what to answer.

_" So? I don't think my question was that difficult. "_

_" It… It wasn't, President. " _Stuttered Peeta.

_" You obviously have other things to ask for. So go on. "_

_" I want to be part of the team that will be sent to the Capitol to rescue Katniss, Johanna and Annie. "_

_" I don't know if I can let you do that, Mr Mellark. "_

_" Why not? "_

_" You're really important in this revolution. And send you over there, is taking a big risk. I'm already sending Mr Hawthorne and Mr Odair. I think that's generous enough from me. Don't you think? "_

_" Sure it is, Mrs President. But I want to be there. I really do. "_

_" I know that. I know. " _Coin said, nodding to herself.

Silence hanged around them, and Peeta had this feeling he shouldn't be pushing too hard for that decision. He told Finnick himself that he would give in the President's decision, even if it was a bad one for him. But he really wanted to go. He was useless in 13.

_" I'm no help in here. "_

_" You are. " _Coin answered fast.

_" I guess that means I won't go. "_

_" I'll think about it. Now, if you have nothing else to ask, you can leave. "_

_" Thank you, President. "_

Coin nodded, Peeta bowed and left the Commandment Center. The heavy door rolled and closed, leaving Coin alone with her papers. So, he was going to be a soldier again, but won't be sent to the Capitol to save the girls. He didn't know how to react to the news. What was he trained for then? This was stupid.

And what was the President working on, alone, on top of that? That was really strange. And did anybody get an interview like him and Prim did? He didn't hear about that at all. Neither Gale or Finnick talked about being interviewed.

Weird things were being prepared, and the boy wanted to know what it was all about. Only he couldn't.

Peeta didn't have any lesson before 10 AM, so he decided to go shower and crash in the library, not willing to watch any Capitol show in the television room. He chose not to read his book about the Games, and took the third Harry Potter. He settled on a chair and got totally into his reading.

His bracelet reminded him that he had classes right before his physic lesson. He didn't really want to go, but did so anyway. The President just admitted that she would give him his soldier rank again, and he wasn't going to ruin that by something as stupid as skipping class.

After one hour and a half of exercises about gravitation and forces, Peeta was totally exhausted, his hand tired from writing, his eyes red with the lack of sleep, his head hurting because of all the questions he had.

He needed a walk outside, fresh air, but that was impossible in District 13. Oh how he wished they could be all in 12, free from fear. He thought about Katniss again, and his will to go and get her from Snow, as far as he could. Now, he was hoping that Coin would allow him to do as he wished, but nothing was more unsure than that.

He made his way to the canteen, hungry after his morning. A potato and courgettes soup was waiting for him with a big slice of bread. He enjoyed every bit of it, but unfortunately, the banana he ate after it had no taste at all, and got stuck to his palate. He drank his glass of water in one go in a poor attempt to erase the tasteless feel of the fruit in his mouth.

_" Really hungry are we? " _Gale said, cracking a laugh.

_" Yes, totally. But you shouldn't touch that fruit. It's horrible. "_

_" Sad. I swear that banana was begging me to devour her… "_

The whole table started laughing uncontrollably after Gale's sentence. Guards motioned to them to lower the volume, but it was so rare to have a good laugh that the blond boy decided not to notice it. His arms closed around his ribs, his muscles contracting in such a comfortable way. After a few moments, the laughters lowered and Peeta was brushing tears from his eyes as Prim was hiding her face in his shoulder. She was still shaking, and the boy adored that sensation running through his whole being.

_" I talked to Coin this morning. "_

_" What did you want to know? "_

_" I wanted to make sure I'll have my soldier rank back. And I asked her to go rescue Katniss with you. "_

_" Did she agree with that last point? "_

_" Sadly, no. She said she will think about it. "_

_" I don't think she will let you, then. " _Gale sighed, shaking his head slightly.

_" I know. But it's hard to accept that. "_

Gale nodded as he pushed his banana away with a sight. Prim laughed again and Peeta joined her. But the boy was thinking about staying in 13 while the others will be in Panem, making their way to the Capitol. He would be so upset and worried. That wasn't fair. Just because he could talk, he had to stay, that was senseless.

_\- After what Katniss said yesterday, I don't get Coin's point in keeping me here. How could I help? A lot of people don't believe me anymore._

_\- People don't, but she does. I guess that's enough for her._

And Peeta knew the other boy was right about that. What things will she make him do if he stayed? He didn't really want to know. The only thing he was sure about was that he would spend most of his time in Beetee's office, keeping track of the squad.

_\- Peeta, you do remember the talk we had about the Nuts, right?_

_\- Yes. What about it?_

_\- Well, if you think about it, Coin will have to do it before she sends us to the Capitol. _

_\- That's correct._

_\- Only, I didn't hear about it._

Peeta frowned, Gale was totally right. When was the President of 13 going to launch this mission? The more she waited, the longer Katniss stayed in Snow's hands. The blond boy sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. He had to talk to Coin again.

_\- I'll go and talk to her about that tonight._

_\- You already asked her something this morning. I'll do it. And I'll push her about sending you._

_\- Thank you. That's nice._

_\- I'm sure you'll be a good ally in there. That's why I do that._

Gale smiled to Peeta, and the boy mirrored him. Prim seemed to be lost in the conversation, as she stopped eating, soup dropping from her spoon. Her mom laughed and shacked her forearm gently. He was glad not to be the one going to have a talk with the President. Even if she didn't blame all of their group for what they did, he still despised her. He couldn't get himself to trust in her. Peeta knew what her intentions were, and why she was keeping people like him or Gale close to her. Maybe she succeeded in gaining Gale's trust, but she would never have his.

_\- So it means that we'll stay here longer than expected. I just want to go get Katniss._

Peeta simply nodded, feeling the exact same way as Gale. But they really couldn't send people to the Capitol with all their hovercrafts still ready to fly and shoot them on their way. Gale had to talk with the President Coin as soon as he could, it was a matter of time, a matter of life. Katniss, Johanna and Annie could die anytime, and wasting days training in 13 couldn't help anyone, Peeta knew it.

_\- Do you think you can ask her this afternoon?_

_\- Well, with you begging to be sent, I'm not sure it would be a wise decision. What do you think?_

_\- I don't know. But the girls' lives are in danger. There is no time to waste._

_\- You're right. But I know how Coin's working, and asking her now would be pretty much useless. I was thinking of going tomorrow morning._

_\- Do as you like. Just keep in touch._

_\- Of course. Well, it will be easier when you'll have your soldier rank back. We'll see each other more often._

_\- Sure it will be. If I don't go with you, I guess I'll have it. _

Gale nodded, as he was eyeing his banana. Peeta laughed in a muted way and the other boy smiled, deciding to eat his fruit anyway. Prim made a disgusted face as she tasted hers, and carefully settled it down on her plate.

_\- Peeta's right, Gale. This is just awful. You shouldn't eat it._

_\- I know he's right… It's just that I'm still hungry._

Prim smiled as Gale put his banana in his mouth and took a bit of it. He chewed it slowly before Peeta and Prim's eyes and had to spit it in his empty bowl.

_\- God! I didn't know a banana could taste like that! They shouldn't give it, people could get diseases! _

Everyone at their table laughed and Gale took his sister's banana and left the table, throwing his tray away. He waved as he exited the canteen. Peeta sighed heavily and followed Gale's steps, Prim walking behind him.

_\- Peeta, I wanted to ask you something._

_\- Yeah sure, what is it?_

_\- Well, you see, I have blank pages in my notebook, for almost everyday I wrote._

_\- What about it, Prim?_

_\- I wanted to know if you could maybe draw, or paint on each of them. A thing related to it, you know… _

Peeta was surprised by the offer, but couldn't refuse. Only, the things written in that notebook were quite personal, and he didn't feel really comfortable with reading it in its totality.

_\- Maybe you should mark every part that I can read. You can do that?_

_\- Yeah, sure. That's nice from you to think about that._

_\- Well, privacy is important. So I understand if there are some parts that you don't want to share. I mean, it's your notebook, it's kind of a diary. _

_\- Then, I'll give it to you tomorrow. Is it okay?_

_\- Sure. _

The boy smiled when he saw Prim's cheeks burn and turn bright pink.

_\- Thank you. It'll be even beautifuler with your art in it._

_\- That's a big deal. I'll do my best._

_\- I'm sure you will. Well, I have to hurry now, my test starts in ten minutes and I want to settle down before it does._

_\- Okay. Then, good luck._

_\- Thanks. See you at diner!_

Katniss' sister bowed lightly and headed towards the stairs as Peeta watched her go away. He smiled as he decided to head to the library and find some kind of an art book. The boy wanted to make sure that there will be plenty of styles in Prim's book.

He spent two hours reading books about painting and drawing, completely into it. He learnt quite a lot of new technics and was happy about it. Then, in the middle of a book, the blond froze, staring at a picture of a mockingbird. It was painted in really dark shades, and the bird was surrounded by flames. Katniss' words echoed in his head and he had to close the book, feeling as if he was drowning. He pulled back the book in its place and left the library as quietly as he entered it.

As Peeta made his way to the elevator, he felt dizzy, his breath stuck in his throat. He tapped on the highest level number and the machine started moving, making him sick. The boy wanted to puke his lunch, but held into the iron walls as he waited for the elevator to stop. He almost jumped out of it and made his way to the bench.

He fell in it and tried to stop the voices in his head. They were telling him that he lost Katniss, and that even if he got her back from the Capitol, she'll never appreciate him again. He clinched his jaw, closed his eyes and shacked his head, surrounded by words. Katniss' face on the last interview was haunting him. The way she could fake a smile, and show zero emotion when it came to talk about him. Did she felt indifferent about him? Did she ever care about him, for real? He didn't know, but those questions were pointless at the moment. He wasn't going to find the answers, seating on a bench in District 13.

After hours of anxiety and panic attacks, his bracelet told him it was already time for dinner. He pulled his best fake smile on and headed slowly to the cafeteria. There, he joined all the others, already feasting over a plate full of carrots and soya.

_\- Look Peeta. The banana's back._

Peeta got out of his world when he heard Prim's voice. Gale was laughing as he waved his yellow fruit in front of him. Peeta laughed in a half-hearted fashion. He tried to enjoy those rare moments of happiness, but he knew that their situation was tough, almost desperate.

_\- They want to get rid of it, it's obvious._

This time, Peeta laughed as Gale ended his sentence. He realized Katniss' mom was laughing too, and it was a relief. Seeing this woman close to being happy was such a wonderful thing, and Finnick's words came back to his mind. _" Since you got here, Primrose and her mother smile Peeta. I don't think you realize how wonderful that is! "_. He smiled and patted Prim's back as she came back from her laughter.

The boy tried to cling into that feeling of comfort he was feeling. Because it was sure not going to last.

**NDA: I'm so sorry for the wait guys!**

**I couldn't get any inspiration. These situations are hard, tbh.**

**But here is the 20th chapter, yay!**

**I hope you enjoyed it.**

**See you in chapter 21st.**

**Bisous.**


	21. Chapter 21 : I have to be over there

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 21 : I have to be other there**

As he made his way out of the cafeteria, Peeta felt sleepy, and his head was hurting. He growled and put a hand on his temple, trying to avoid the pain he was experiencing at the moment. His feet leaded him to his room, where he took his pajama, a towel and his tiny grey bathing essentials bag. He walked towards the closest bathroom and settled his grey towel over a door. Turning on his heels, he faced himself in a mirror, but couldn't quite recognize himself. He was skinnier than ever, had big bags under his eyes, and his jaw didn't seem to be able to relax. Sighing, he opened his shower door but a hand on his shoulder made him jump and turn around.

_" Hey there Peeta, I didn't mean to scare you! "_

_" Oh, Haymitch, that's just you… "_

_" Well… I don't know how to react to that to be honest, ha ha. " _Laughed Haymitch.

_" Sorry, sorry. I'm just exhausted. "_

_" Well boy, just try to catch some sleep tonight, alright? I know it might be annoying to hear people telling you that, but that's all we can do to help you. "_

_" Thanks. Did you want to talk about something, maybe? "_

Peeta looked in his ex-mentor's eyes, and could see this man's soul was older than it should be. The Games destroyed him. The blond boy remembered when Katniss and him learned about their mentor's Quarter Quell, where the were not 24 but 48 tributes. The survivor of this massacre was standing right in front of him, trying to act as if he was still living. Something broke in Peeta's heart as he realized he was going to be the same. Not that he didn't respect Haymitch, but his train of living wasn't normal. And the man's mind was a mess, reducing him to drink until drunk every day for the rest of his existence. Peeta shivered, waiting for Haymitch's answer, patiently.

_" Well, since the Order of the Mockingjay doesn't meet anymore, I wanted to keep track of how you guys were doing. I could know this yeah, but I stay in the kitchens most of the days, drinking what the cooks can give me. "_

_" I see, it's okay, don't worry. I talked with Coin today, and I'm getting my soldier rank's back, I'm glad. "_

_" That's good news! " _Nodded Haymitch, patting Peeta's shoulder. "_You deserve to be part of this army, boy. "_

_" But when I came up with the topic of rescuing Katniss, Annie and Johanna, the President didn't seem quite happy with it. I don't think she will let me go. "_

_" Then you'll stay with me. I'll be there! "_

_" But I have to be over there. You know that, Haymitch. I swore to protect Katniss, and she's in Snow's arms, like a pantomime. I have to do something. "_

_" I swore this too. And I failed her. Did you ask for some help, to be recommended? "_

_" Sure, Gale will converse with the President tomorrow. I'm not sure it will be well seen by her, but it's nice of him. "_

_" He's a good boy y'a know… A really good guy. True to himself, willing to help the weak and the poor. " _

_" Gale sure has good goals and ambitions. He's much more better than me. "_

_" Don't say that boy. Don't say that. " _Haymitch said, shaking his head.

Peeta gave his ex-mentor a weak smile and nodded, knowing he wasn't believable. He knew he would never be able to accept himself again if something bad happened to Katniss, the only person he had left.

_" I think a lot about that time, on the beach in the arena. "_

_" Oh, this one time with Katniss, and the medallion? "_

_" Exactly. This day, she told me I had to live. She told me she needed me. I don't think she does anymore. Maybe she didn't even need me once. Well, only for surviving matter. "_

_" You shouldn't think about that Peeta. " _Haymitch said, brushing some invisible dust away from his eyes. _" It's no use. "_

_" I know. But I keep dreaming about this scene. And maybe she was telling the truth, maybe she did. But I need her more than she needs me. "_

_" There's no way to know that. "_

_" Yeah, unfortunately. "_

_" Don't lose faith Peeta, don't ever give up. Even in your darkest hours. Know that there are people that actually care about you. "_

The blond boy didn't say anything, staring at his feet covered in those ugly grey shoes. Haymitch laughed and made Peeta look up at him.

_" Yeah, I know! You think I'm talking nonsense because I'm drunk, but boy… Drunk people tell the truth, they really do. You have to be strong, for all of those people looking up to you. And I'm talking about Katniss' mother, Prim, Finnick, me… We believe in you, boy. "_

_" Thank you Haymitch. "_

_" Never forget this conversation we just had, and focus on the tiny bright side that you can see, that you want to reach. "_

_" I will, I promise. " _Peeta said, nodding slightly.

_" I'm sure you will boy. Well, I'll let you shower, there's a bottle of alcohol waiting for me somewhere behind some dirty boxes! Take care Peeta! "_

_" Sure, take care of you too. "_

_" I can't say I will, but I'll give it a try. "_

Haymitch winked at Peeta and turned around, walking his wavy way out of the bathrooms. The blond boy sighed and looked at himself in the mirror once again. He shouldn't be punishing himself for what happened, he had to make a change, just as Gale said. Blaming himself would lead him nowhere, and he would just end up thinner and weaker.

Peeta enjoyed his shower more than he ever did in 13. The warm water making his blond hair stick to his forehead and temples. He took the bottle of shampoo and took a small amount of it in his hands, rubbing them together. A nice white foam formed and he applied it on his wet hair, whistling as he continued to shower. He ran his hands on his torso, over his disappearing abdominals, and over his thick leg. He had to take a moment to wash the shower gel that was staying over his fake, substitute one. He rinsed himself properly and dried as fast as possible. He got in his pajama and exited the cabin with his toothbrush between his teeth, and his wet towel over his shoulders. He brushed his teeth and left, throwing his dirty uniform in the basket on his way. Life in 13 was now quite normal to the blond boy, that rubbed his towel over his wet hair.

He made his way to his room and fell on his tiny bed that creaked under his weight. The boy stared blankly at the ceiling of his room and tried to remember how his life was in 12 before the Hunger Games. He spent most of his time in school, with a couple friends, that he didn't really care about. And every time he cached a glimpse of Katniss, he could only stare as he remembered the day when he threw her some burnt bread. Remorse and sadness ran through him every time he saw the girl's face. He was kinda fascinated by her. Not only by her looks, that were impressive for a girl that young, but also by her courage, and her will to take care of her family. Peeta didn't know what it meant to take care of a family, as his parents did it for him and his brothers. From this rainy day, the boy had seem to be unable to forget about Katniss. He didn't think he could call it love, but he knew there was something about her that would never leave him. He fell asleep without even realizing it, completely exhausted.

He woke up screaming and shivering, covered in sweat. Pulling on the grey sheets, the muscles in his arms didn't seem like they could ever relax, and his heart was completely crazy. The boy closed his eyes, focusing on his breathing, slowly letting go of the handful of sheets he was holding. He put a shaking hand on his forehead, he was burning. Images of his nightmare were printed in his mind, and he couldn't throw them away. He was with Katniss, probably in the Capitol, they were talking but he couldn't remember what was the topic. Then a group of tracker jackers started bitting him on his neck, face, hands and feet. He screamed Katniss' name, telling her to go away, but when he looked up, Katniss had turned into President Snow and was smirking at him.

He tried not to understand the meaning of that nightmare and took a fresh towel with a new pair of pajamas. A look at his wrist told him it was 3 AM, so he was sure that he could walk without running into someone. He left his room, the sliding door closing behind him. Covered in sweat, panting, he made his way to the bathrooms. He turned the light on, a clicking sound revolving in the empty room. Peeta put his towel over the grey door of the first cabin and entered it. He turned the cold water faucet and stood under the water, with his eyes wide open. There was no time to be wasted, they had to get the girls. He thought about Finnick, and knew that his friend wasn't doing any better than him. There was both his lover and friend in Snow's hands, so the boy was for sure not having a fun time in 13.

He exited the shower in a new pajama and sighed, staring at his sick reflection in the mirror. A surprised scream escaped his mouth as he saw someone standing behind him.

_" F-F-Finnick! What are you doing here? " _Peeta stuttered.

_" I could ask you the same question, here. " _

_" You scared me… "_

_" Sorry about that. I couldn't sleep, and it's too hot in my room. What about you? "_

_" A nightmare. Nothing to worry about. "_

_" You should take a look at your face. You look sick, Peeta. "_

_" I know. " _The blond sighed back.

_" You'd better go back and try to sleep until morning. Okay? "_

_" Sure, good night Finnick. "_

_" Thanks, you too. " _

Finnick bowed his head and left the bathrooms, his steps not making a single noise on the grey floor of the district. Peeta sighed and avoided his reflection as he left too. His room wasn't far away, but it seemed like an eternity as his fake leg made a single, metallic noise every time it hit the ground. He slid the door of his room close and settled under his grey covers. His small bed was feeling too big as he stood alone in it. Katniss and him took a habit of sleeping together every night since that night on the train. That night, when he promised her he would always stay with her.

Peeta was struggling, trying to hold back his tears. Too tired to fight against them, he let the salted drops roll over his cheeks and end on his sheets. He didn't make any noise, didn't move as the drops kept flowing. The boy stood like this for hours, blinking only when the tears blinded the pattern on the ceiling of his room.

The clock on his tiny nightstand said 7 AM. He had to get up and head to the cafeteria, he had to move, to do something, anything. He growled, his throat hurting after another nightless sleep. He sat up on his bed, his available leg shaking as he put on his shoes. He got up, his back hurting because of cramps but he headed towards the cafeteria anyway.

Prim was already there, her hair tied up in a ponytail. She smiled and waved when she saw him entering the room, almost empty at such an early hour. Peeta answered with a heartwarming smile and took his ashtray to the table, seating in front of her.

_" Already awake little Prim? " _Peeta said, smiling.

_" Yes, I have another set of exams today, and I wanted to read my notes once again. "_

_" You're such a good student. Your mother must be really proud of you. "_

_" She really is, and she's very supportive. She asks me questions before I go to bed, concerning my lessons. This way, I remember things quicker than by reading it on my own. "_

_" That's nice, and it looks like it's helping you. "_

_" It is, it is… But Peeta, you seem down these days. And you lost weight. Are you okay? "_

_" Don't worry about me. I'm going to be a soldier again. " _Peeta simply answered.

_" Oh, and you're happy about it? "_

_" Of course I am. "_

Peeta smiled to the blonde girl and took a piece of dried peach from his plate. He chewed on it, and was ravished by its taste, totally opposite from the banana's. The boy cracked a laugh when he thought about the fruit once again.

_" What are you laughing about? " _Prim asked, surprised.

_" I was thinking about the banana disaster the other day. "_

_" It sure was disgusting. I never knew bananas could taste that bad, and be that sticky! "_

Peeta stayed with Prim for an hour in the cafeteria, helping her with her lessons. Katniss' mother didn't stay thought, having to head back to the hospital of District 13. When 8 AM came, Prim had to go to class, and left Peeta alone on their table. Gale didn't show up at all, and the blond boy wondered if he was actually with Coin, discussing his departure with the squad. He swallowed hardly and put his empty ashtray away. He looked at his schedule, and saw that he had a mathematics lesson followed by an economics one. He sighed, stretched and stopped by his room to collect a notebook and pen.

He sat on a table in the back of the room, and looked to his left, where windows should be showing the outside. How depressing living underground could be. He shacked his head and followed the lesson, participating so the teacher would leave him alone for the hour and a half left. He kept focusing on what the teacher could teach him and left completely tired and not willing to go to his next appointment. He yawned and wondered if Gale had already finished debating with President Coin about him being a part of the squad going to the Capitol to save the girls. Peeta knew that he wasn't really fair to Coin as she was already sending two important figures of the revolution there, Gale and Finnick. It was a big risk for her to send him too, but selfishly, he wanted to go.

He entered the classroom where the economics lesson will be given, and noticed Prim. He sat next to her and tapped her shoulder gently. The girl jumped and laughed when she realized it was just Peeta.

_" What are you doing here? This is the first time I see you here. "_

_" Well, my teacher told me we could take optional lessons, so here I am. "_

_" You love studying, don't you? "_

_" I do. I love learning things. " _Prim nodded, blushing.

Peeta smiled and was about to talk to Prim when the teacher came in the room, followed by Gale. Peeta and Gale's eyes met and Gale just nodded silently as he made his way to a free table. The smaller boy smiled, hoping that he interpreted Gale's gesture in the right way.

After an hour oh studying, Boggs came through the door.

_" Excuse me for disturbing your lesson, but can I borrow you Mr Mellark? "_

_" Sure. Mr Mellark, go on. "_

_" Oh, take your things with you. "_

Peeta nodded and followed Coin's secondhand in the corridors. He was sure she was going to be upset because he used Gale's help in order to go to the Capitol. Maybe she won't let him go, or won't give him his soldier rank because of that. This was a thing Peeta didn't want to happen. He was anxious as the elevator's doors opened and Boggs motioned to him to go ahead. The boy nodded and stopped in front of the Commandment Center. He gave it two strong knocks and the doors opened instantly, with Coin behind it.

She looked tired, yet she still had this look in her eyes that made her intimidating. She stepped to the side, allowing Peeta to enter the empty Commandment Center. He sat on a chair and waited for the impact.

_" You wanted to see me, President? "_

_" Yes. Your little friend, soldier Hawthorne and me talked about you for two straight hours. I must say that it was exhausting, this boy has a lot of persistence. "_

Peeta couldn't find anything to answer so he kept staring at Coin. She looked as if she was waiting for something to happen. Did she want him to apologize and take back his request? That was not going to happen. After a minute of tensed silence, the doors opened behind them, and Beetee rolled in on his wheel chair.

_" Oh, Mr Latier, thank you for coming so fast. "_

_" No problem, President. Should I start now? "_

_" Sure, go on. " _Coin said, in her usual mechanic tone.

Coin motioned to Peeta as Beetee nodded and rolled towards the blond boy that had no clue on what was happening before his eyes. He swallowed as Beetee took a toolbox from under his wheel chair.

_" May I ask what you're going to do? "_

_" Giving you your soldier rank back, Peeta. "_

Peeta, that was all tensed up, relaxed in his chair as Beetee connected his bracelet to a tiny box. He was so relieved, that Coin didn't change her mind about that. The silver haired woman was standing still on their sides, watching carefully what Beetee was doing. The black man didn't seem to care about this pair of frozen eyes looking down on him, as he kept doing things with a lot of tools Peeta never saw before.

_" President, I need your card. "_

_" Sure. "_

The woman opened her jacket, and looked inside a secret pocket. She took out a golden card, weird for a district so grey, and handed it to Beetee. The man thanked her and took out a big machine, where he scanned the card. Coin was already waiting to have it back, her palm open in front of the mechanician. Beetee put the card there, and Coin quickly put it back to where it was before. Peeta couldn't help but wonder what such a card could do in the district.

_" While Mr Latier keeps on working on your grade, I want to keep you in touch with what's happening backstage. "_

_" Sure. "_

_" The nuts' expedition will be launched two days from now. So, be ready because I'm sending you there, with Mr Hawthorne. A bunch of soldiers will go with you too. Promise me you won't do anything stupid. "_

_" Like what? " _Peeta asked, cocky.

_" Mr Mellark, just promise. "_

_" I promise you I won't do anything stupid. "_

_" Good. " _Coin said, nodding.

Beetee kept working on his bracelet, and after a few minutes, he sighed and crossed a hand on his sweaty forehead. He disconnected Peeta's bracelet to the machine and rolled back. He closed his toolbox on his knees and put it back under his wheel chair.

_" There, it's done President. "_

_" Thank you. You can leave now. "_

The doors opened and closed as Peeta looked at his bracelet, where he could see his soldier rank was finally back. He had to work hard now, in order to not lose it again. He was now wondering what next was about to come, as Coin stared at him intensely.

_" So, thanks to Mr Hawthorne, you'll be going to the Capitol. "_

_" Thank you so much. "_

_" You should thank him, not me. "_

_" I will do that, obviously. " _Peeta said, bowing his head.

_" I accepted, but if you mess with the district just a tiny little other time, you'll stay. Did you understand Mr Mellark? "_

_" I did. "_

_" Now, you may leave. "_

_" Thank you. "_

Coin rolled her eyes as she followed Peeta to the door. He thanked her again and she closed the door just in front of his nose. The boy sighed and stretched. There was only fifteen minutes left in his economics lesson, so he wasn't going to go back there. Instead, he headed to the cafeteria, where the first inhabitants started to gather. He sat on the table he shared with the Everdeens and the Hawthornes, and smiled as he looked at his plate full of mashed potatoes and soya.

The odds were finally starting to be in their favor.

**NDA: I'm really, really sorry.**

**I moved out of my home, started college and had a lot to do these last weeks.**

**So I want to apologize about the lack of chapter, and can't promise it will be better in the coming month.**

**I'll try to give you the 22nd chapter before September ends, but I'm not saying I will.**

**Thanks you for reading me,**

**See you in the next chapter!**

**Bisous.**


	22. Chapter 22 : Nothing can be overlooked

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 22 : Nothing can be overlooked**

Peeta ate joyfully, quickly joined by both Gale, Prim and her mom. They sat and the young girl seemed to notice instantly how happy the blond boy was. She giggled on her chair as she cut her soya in thin pieces. Peeta couldn't stop smiling as he slowly emptied his plate, taking forks of his mashed potatoes happily.

_" Something good happened after you left? " _Prim asked, putting down her fork.

_" Well, I was excused, which was a good start, and then Coin gave me back my soldier rank. And hopefully, I will be part of the squad that will go and rescue your sister. "_

Prim's mom tightened on her chair, and rotated her head slowly, staring at the ex baker's boy. A smile slowly grew on her tired face and she cracked a weak laugh. Peeta nodded as he kept eating, feeling resourced once again. He checked his schedule and had nothing to do for the next three hours. Then, he'll have his first training session in a long time.

_" I heard that the President was about to make a TV apparition this afternoon. I wonder if she's going to say something about the Capitol's mission. " _Gale announced, glaring at his plate.

Gale stared at Peeta that gave him a quizzical look. He was with the president a couple minutes ago, and she didn't tell her about that. The other boy was sure closer from Coin than he would ever be. He didn't know how he could trust someone like that, but he was aware of the advantage it gave them. Prim seemed to listen carefully, even thought she wasn't looking at them while her mother stared at the two boys.

_" Or about the Nuts' operation. Maybe both. " _Peeta added.

Gale nodded as he patted his younger sister's head, looking totally fond of the tiny blonde girl. Peeta missed his family. Even if he never had this kind of relation with them, they still were family to him. He sighed remembering Johanna saying the same thing about the other tribute of her District during the Quarter Quell. He finished his plate and ate his pear before leaving the cafeteria with Gale, discussing over the Nuts operation.

_" I still think that bombing around it is the best solution we have. Going inside will be too dangerous, and even if we outnumber them, the tunnels won't allow us to use this advantage. And they could sacrifice themselves and take us down with them. This won"t stop the revolution, I know, but I don't want to die like that if there's another option. "_

_" But I keep thinking of those innocent people working in there, the ones that are on our side, on the rebellion side. It's not fair to take them down too. "_

_" It's them, or the rest of the rebels. Choose. Plus, some of them will make it out of the Nuts, I'm sure. " _Gale blurt out, confident.

Peeta swallowed hardly, knowing that Gale was right about that, but he couldn't give in a solution that meant killing some of their allies. He had never been one for massacres, wars or killing, and having the possibility to save some of those lives was hard to bear. He couldn't oppose Gale's plan as he didn't have another one that could work. He inhaled deeply and followed Katniss' best friend. They kept discussing their plan and had to part as Gale had to join Beetee in his lab. He saluted the smaller boy and left.

The blond boy sighed and decided to crash on his bench for a while, just to try to work things out. He wasn't surprised to see Finnick sitting there, but was when he noticed the rope in his hands.

_" Finnick, what are you doing? "_

_" I'm tying knots, it helps me when I'm getting anxious about things. " _

_" You could talk to me about what makes you so worried, you know? Your hands are all injured, look at them, they're bleeding. "_

_" I know Peeta, I noticed, but it's the only way. Otherwise, I can't sleep, I can't think, I can't live. As long as I tie these knots, my mind focuses on something else than what stresses me out. I'll get it if you don't understand, but I need it. I need to do it. "_

_" Set this down for a while, and talk to me Finnick. I told you, I'm here if you need to talk to someone. "_

_" I remember yes, but i'll keep tying knots, is it okay? " _Finnick asked, even though he considered only one answer.

_" Sure. "_

Peeta was quite intrigued by the way Finnick's mind and muscles remembered how to do these knots. The blond in front of him didn't need to look at what he was doing to do and undo them, over and over. But at the same time, Peeta was worried and scared. Finnick did a good job hiding his insecurities for the time being, when in reality, he suffered that much. Peeta wanted to punch himself for bewailing his fate when other where getting through the same thing. He wanted to punch himself for not noticing how bad his friend was doing in 13.

_" I know that… We'll be going to the Capitol soon, like in less than a week, to take back the girls. But what if it was already too late? What if Snow knew what we were planning? "_

_" There's no way he could know that. Only a few people in here know about Coin's plans. How could he know, when he has a whole nation to channel and convince? "_

_" And what if… What if we get to the Capitol? Do you think Snow will hand them to us, just like that? There's no way we can take them back, Peeta. " _Finnick said seriously.

Peeta didn't answer anything, feeling that the other boy had other things to say. Plus, he couldn't think of a response that would make sense after what Finnick just said. Most of what he told was painfully right, and there was nothing he could do about it.

_" We'll die, and then, maybe Coin will do something. But she doesn't care about the girls. She doesn't give a shit about Annie or Johanna. And I can say that because she said that Katniss, the mockingjay, was dead when she wasn't. How could she care about a crazy axe girl and a dumb ginger girl? "_

Finnick made a dramatic pause, and looked at Peeta, scanning his face for any reaction to what he was telling him. But the boy in front of him was stoic, wearing a worried frown.

_" We'll die and they'll die too! "_

_" We will go there, and we'll find out what to do. There are a lot of people with us, and a lot that believe in us and trust us. "_

_" I don't want to keep people's faith up when I can't believe in what we're about to do myself, Peeta! I can't lie to these people and say " Yes, we're getting the girls back, and then we'll make Snow fall ". I just can't, and I'm a terrible liar. This man has so much power, what can a bunch of rebels like us do against that? "_

_" We can try, we can push Panem to an entire rebellion. We'll find a way. "_

_" You don't know what this man can do… You have no idea. You have no clue, not a single one, Peeta… " _Finnick sighed, pulling on the rope.

Finnick did a pause in his sentence, and the other boy could only search for answers on his face. He could clearly sense that something wasn't right. Finnick seemed harmed, defenseless now that he talked about the means that the President could use.

_" And maybe it's better for you. "_

_" What did he do to you, Finnick? " _Peeta asked, worried.

After minutes of exchanges, there was no sound in the last level of District 13, not a single one. The smaller blond was feeling uncomfortable, but he waited for the other to say something. Finnick had stopped tying knots, the rope settled on his thighs, and Peeta was thankful for that. The two boys stared at each other.

_" What he did to me? I'm not sure you want to hear about that, Peeta. "_

_" I do. " _Peeta answered quickly.

Finnick's eyes were full of a sadness so deep, that Peeta felt like he was drowning in it. He felt sucked by this feeling, but kept staring at the older boy anyway.

_" He killed everyone that I love. "_

The use of present made Peeta shiver, sweat forming in his neck, on his forehead. It didn't surprise him much from Snow to kill the winner's family to pressure them, but as Finnick was one of his closest friends, if not his best friend, he felt hurt. Pain expanded in his chest as he tried to stay composed.

_" I had no one left. And when I thought I touched the ground, he sold me to whoever wanted to have a good time with me. I can't even tell you how many people dirtied my body, and… I don't want to remember. "_

Finnick smiled when he saw the distress in the other boy's widened eyes and shacked his head slightly. Then he sighed and looked up at the grey ceiling of District 13.

_" Yeah I know. I was kind of a whore, you see. But now it's over. " _Finnick brushed out with a laugh.

_" I had no idea… I'm sorry. "_

_" Oh please, I don't want to hear an apology from you Peeta. It's not your fault. And I don't want to hear pity in your voice when it comes to me. I assure you, this is the last of my problems right now. "_

_" Are you really okay about it? "_

_" Of course I'm not. My body is… Well, it was an awful part of my existence, but now I'm here, with all of you, so I guess I'm better. "_

Peeta sadly smiled and hugged the boy in front of him. Finnick gave him a hug back and they stayed in that warm embrace for a while, breaths calm and collected. The smaller blond was feeling totally wrecked after this new. How was he supposed to react to this kind of thing? And what could he do to help the man in front of him? He had no idea, but he sure was going to try his best.

_" Thank you for telling me, Finnick. " _Peeta said in a shaky voice.

_" You shouldn't thank me for that. It's a burden I didn't want to share with someone like you, you don't need it. It's hard enough for you now. "_

_" Stop thinking about me, we're talking about you. "_

_" I know. " _Finnick said, smiling.

Silence settled once again in the corridor, but it wasn't unpleasant like before. The bond behind the two boys was getting stronger, and Peeta felt really attached to the boy in front of him.

_" Let's say that we succeed, and get the girl back. How do we make our way back? "_

The sudden change of subject made Peeta tighten up on the bench, his hands closing around the wooden planks. He never thought of the way back before, only worrying about going there. How selfish has he been?

_" I mean, Snow will be aware that the girls are missing, and will send a big part of his army after us, obviously. How are we going to do? "_

_" We will surely be less than when we leave 13… So it's a good question. "_

_" Yeah, I was wondering about it in military strategy this morning. We'll have to see that with the Conceal. "_

_" Sure, I'll mention it. Unless you want to. "_

_" Oh no, go ahead. " _Finnick said, smiling.

Suddenly, the single TV screen in the level turned on, and some sizzling sound started to echo in the corridor. Both boys turned towards it, waiting for something to show. Coin appeared, her hair as straight as always, her features as cold as ever. Peeta knew this was the apparition Gale talked about, so he focused intensely.

" Ladies and gentlemen, inhabitants of District 13, this is an official announcement . I, your District President, along with the Conceal, agreed on a mission two days from now. A group of soldiers and important figures will go to the Nuts, where the hovercrafts are located, and take down its system. This is an essential operation, and nothing can be overlooked. "

Finnick smiled and kicked friendly Peeta's ribs with his elbow. The other boy smiled and nodded, as he focused on the screen again.

" I hope every single of you will stay quiet about this, even if we're not connected to the rest of the country. Even a tiny information sent to the rest of Panem could overturn this mission, that is a key to the success of our revolution. Next thing, is the list of the people that will go to the Capitol to rescue Katniss Everdeen, Johanna Mason and Annie Cresta, a couple days after this operation. "

Peeta swallowed, hoping that both the President and Paylor agreed on his place in the squad.

" My secondhand Boggs. Pollux. Homes. Mitchell. Castor. Cressida. Jackson. Lieutenant Paylor. Gale Hawthorne. Leeg 1. Leeg 2. Finnick Odair and Peeta Mellark. I hope you will all be able to work together in union and strength. It might change in the next two days. "

Peeta sighed, relieved that she didn't change her mind. Finnick tapped him on his shoulder and squeezed his arm between his hand. They both laughed, in an awkward way but were satisfied. Even if they were about to die, they would be where they had to be. Peeta thought that he didn't know about most of the squad, but was sure he will be able to trust them, if both Paylor and Coin agreed on them going. Maybe he was the one that everyone was having doubts about, but he couldn't careless. He was really going to go and rescue the girls.

" - All the people mentioned in this list will have to come to the Commandment Center tomorrow at 9 in the morning. The list of people going to the Nuts operation will be found in the Grand Hall tonight at 8. This is all for now. Thank you for your attention. "

Of course there will have to be details to be given, recommendations and special trainings. Peeta was convinced that other groups will be send, in order to second them or create a needed diversion. Now that he was thinking about diversion, he realized that he didn't see Plutarch Heavensbee for quite a long time. What was the man doing? The television shut off and Peeta instantly turned towards Finnick.

_" Mind coming with me to see this list tonight? "_

_" Is it another date, Peeta? " _Finnick asked, cocky.

Both man laughed, trying to get rid of the tension that built during their previous conversation. Finnick looked at his wrist and sighed painfully before getting up.

_" Well, thank you for that talk Peeta. I have to go now, negotiation lesson with Paylor. Let's meet at 7:45 here tonight, okay? "_

_" Sure. Work hard! "_

_" I will definitely. "_

Finnick smiled, bowed his head and put his hands in his pocket. Then he turned and made his way towards the elevator. He waved at Peeta just before the doors closed in front of him. He had forgotten his rope, and Peeta took it in his hands. They were covered by dry blood in some places, and the boy couldn't help but feel totally depressed again. He squeezed it and tried to tie a knot, without any success. He gave up and sat back on the bench, closing his eyes.

What he learned about Finnick sure was a shock, but he didn't feel disgusted or anything. It made him want to know more about the guy, and help him. Now, the tables had kinda turned, and he was going to give the boy the same treatment he gave him before. He wanted to be there for him, even more than weeks earlier.

After almost half an hour of reflection on the bench, Peeta moved out of the highest level, entering the elevator. He tried to tap on the level zero, but nothing happened. He sighed and clicked the level where the library was located, as he still had more than two hours before his training session. He didn't want to read anything too violent or psychological, so he picked up the fourth Harry Potter book and settled on a couch. He escaped for a while from all the monstrosity happening around him, and was totally into his reading. His bracelet shone, reminding him that his training session was about to start. He growled, pulled back the book and headed to the elevator. A few soldiers were there as well, like Jazz.

_" Hey Peeta! I'm happy for you. I mean, about going to the Capitol and all! "_

_" Thanks. It's nice to know that Coin agreed on that. "_

_" She knew you were worth it obviously! " _Jazz said, a big smile on his baby face.

That was right. Jazz didn't know anything about Coin lying to the district, so he was probably thinking that the President liked him, or something like that. When in fact, they despised each other and had to deal with each other's presence.

_" Did the sessions changed since I've been coming? "_

_" Yeah, quite a bit. You'll see, Paylor decided to separate us in two groups. "_

_" Oh, how is it working? "_

_" It's totally random. Some of us will start shooting while the others work on their special skills. "_

_" I see. " _Peeta said.

Peeta nodded, this wasn't really changing anything. It was just making things easier for the shooting stands, and avoiding the queue. The boy was still looking forward to train again, as it emptied his mind for the time being.

_" But I think you'll be in another group than mine. " _Jazz sighed, a hand in his curly hair.

_" You might be right. Now that we know who's going to the Capitol, me might start working as a team. "_

_" I thought so too. I'm sure it will be interesting for all of you. "_

_" Interesting, sure. But it's really important for us to find a balance, and a spot for each of us. It could save some of our lives. "_

The two boys were now in the hangar where the soldiers were standing in ranks in front of Paylor. She was walking in circles, checking her bracelet every two seconds.

_" Alright! So today, I won't be the one giving you instructions for your preparation and stretching. You'll have to do it on your own. I guess it won't be a problem as you all do it almost every day. Let's start! "_

She started walking, and stretching her neck, her wrists and shoulders. Meanwhile, Peeta and Jazz found Finnick and mimicked Paylor. They were quickly joined by Gale. The smaller blond wanted to tell Gale about the conversation he had with Finnick, but silence was required during training.

After twenty minutes of warming up, all the soldiers stopped, catching them breath and stretching again.

_" All the people behind this point will go to the shooting stands. The others will go to their special skill stand. But I want all the members of the future squads to join me. So I'm not talking only about the one mentioned by the president earlier! "_

About thirty people were gathered in front of Paylor, waiting for instructions. Peeta took a look, and most of them were men, in their twenties. But there was women too.

_" The members of the principal squad, the one I'm in, will train with the other soldiers for the day, but I want you to acknowledge the members of your team. For the others unites, you'll be with me this afternoon. "_

They divided in two groups, and Peeta took a look at his future teammates. They all introduced themselves and shook hands. Boggs asked them to share their special skills, and typed it all on his machine. Why would he do that when they all answered this question during their recruitment session?

_" Now that the presentations are done, I hope we'll be able to work together. "_

Everyone in the group nodded to what Boggs just said. Then, the tall man motioned to them to go train with the others. Peeta felt strange as the second most important person in the district was going to get his hands dirty during such a mission. It was quite a good news, but somehow, the blond felt something suspicious behind it. Maybe it was a way for Coin to keep an eye on what they were doing. The black man put his tablet thing on a counter by the entrance of the hangar and headed back to the wrestling area.

_" Peeta come on! Let's shoot guns! "_

Peeta shacked his head and ran to catch up with Finnick and Gale, both heading towards the shooting stands. He sighed as he didn't like guns, but did his part anyway. The weeks of non-shooting didn't really help him, and he did quite a bad job at it. It was when he had a crossbow in his hands, that he was finally able to forget about the reason they were training for.

**NDA : Hey, I'm here earlier than I thought!**

**I wanted to give you another chapter as I'm going to have a lot of work at college. And also because I left you during weeks with no update.**

**I hope you liked it,**

**( I personally don't like the end… )**

**See you in the next chapter,**

**bisous. **


	23. Chapter 23 : Now this is a revolution

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 23 : Now, this is a revolution**

As he kept shooting with his crossbow, Peeta's mind was totally blank, only focusing on the aims in front of him. They were 50 meters away from him, but he hit it every single time, making his way to his right, until he reached the last one, 70 meters away. He inhaled deeply and readjusted the crossbow in his hands. He closed his left eye and held his breath. He pressed the trigger and the arrow did a perfect hit. The assistant in charge of the stand congratulated him and the blond had to give his crossbow back. Peeta giggled childishly and stretched his back.

_" Nice shot man. I can't do that! " _Finnick said, behind Peeta.

_" I'm sure you can Finnick, just try again, I'm sure they'll let you. Most of us did our part. "_

The taller blond nodded and Peeta followed him, giving him small tips as his friend tried to hit the targets. Finnick wasn't using a crossbow, but bow and arrows, so it wasn't exactly working in the same way as bows don't have any trigger, but he tried to remember Katniss' technic. The way the end of her arrow brushed her lips, and how she quickly, but gently, removed her finger, letting the arrow fly. Finnick finally hit the last target and thanked Peeta.

_" No need to thank me! It's normal. And I wouldn't be able to shoot with that, to be honest. That's why I choose the crossbow. I'm kinda clumsy you see. "_

_" You're not clumsy. " _Finnick said, laughing. "_Weren't you decorating the cakes back home? "_

Peeta nodded, following the other boy to where they gave back their weapons. He loved frosting the cakes, and adding things on them. This had always been a way for him to express his feelings, and he could spend almost two hours on a single cake.

_" Well, now we have to part. What will you do today? "_

_" I don't want to go with the swords. I guess I'll stick to camouflage. "_

_" Okay, good work there! "_

_" You too! " _Peeta said, waving.

Peeta headed towards the smallest stand in the hangar, where the assistant was waiting, seating behind a counter that was covered by cups, and brushes of all kind and sizes. The man stood up when he saw the ex-tribute arrive, and bowed.

_" It's been a long time. What were you up to? " _The assistant asked.

_" I got suspended. A shame, if you ask me. "_

_" Oh, I see. Was it because of what happened in the Grand Hall? "_

_" You could say so. " _Peeta sighed, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

_" Ah, okay. Well, today you'll paint on my face, alright? "_

Peeta was quite surprised that the man in front of him didn't ask for more details about that suspension. But it was convenient and less bothersome.

_" Sure, it will be a pleasure. Any specific subject? "_

_" As you'll go to the capitol, I gathered this book. You see that kind of marble? Try to reproduce it on me. " _The assistant started. " _It's okay if you don't finish my whole face in an hour. If you can find the good colors, the lightning source and create a good texture it's good. Just do a part of my forehead if you don't have the time to finish those tasks first. "_

_" Okay. Let's do this then. " _Peeta said, nodding.

Peeta liked hanging around in this stand. This was the only place where he could paint, because there was no material in the classrooms. Now, he knew he would have to find Prim and ask her if she was okay with black and white illustrations in her book.

The assistant was a nice guy, and they had a talk every time he chose camouflage over sword, which happened a lot. He stared at the picture, and collected the colors and brushes he needed. The assistant handed him some water in a cup and a few pieces of paper towel.

After half an hour, Peeta got almost all the colors he needed. Ten minutes later, he started painting the assistant's forehead, a frown of concentration on his own. The man below him kept talking as the boy applied small amounts of paint over his skin. He sometimes used his finger to get the pattern he wanted, and by the end of the session, his hands were covered in paint.

Paylor screamed that the session was over, and Peeta had the time to do the assistant's forehead and his nose. He sighed, and thanked the man as he cleaned the brushes. The man checked himself in a mirror and nodded, getting as close as he could to see the details.

_" Yes, as I thought you used green, that's good. " _Said the assistant, nodding slightly._ "A lot of the few students I have forget about it. Marble is not only made of shades of grey as in some places, a greyish-greenish color appears. Well, on this type of marble, but sometimes, it's blueish, or even orangish. Good job soldier Mellark. "_

_" Thank you. And maybe they don't take enough time to look at the model properly. "_

_" I tell them that it's one of the most important part, but whatever, most of them aren't that into arts. "_

_" That's a shame. "_ Peeta added.

The assistant nodded as he used a wet handkerchief to erase the paint from his face. Then, he handed another one to Peeta, so he could clean his hands. The blond would have liked to stay here and paint for a couple more hours, but there was no way he could. Things were really strict in 13, and no time could be wasted in such thing as painting or drawing. He sighed as he put his hands in a small basin full of water, to get rid of the rest of the paint.

He dried his hands on his uniform and saluted the assistant. Then, he walked towards the exit and the elevator, joined by Finnick on the way.

_" Happy you chose the paint over the fight? " _Finnick asked, giggling.

_" Yeah. That's part of the little things I'm sure about. " _Peeta sighed.

_" We sure have been through a lot, uh? " _

_" For sure we have. But we've got each other, right? " _Peeta said, smiling.

Finnick simply nodded and the ride through the depths of District 13 seemed more peaceful than ever. The two boys agreed to meet in front of the bathroom to take their shower and hang "out" together, as they both had nothing planned for the rest of the afternoon. So Peeta stopped by his room, taking what was requested for a shower and headed to the bathroom. Finnick was already there, apparently talking with Gale.

_" Hey there guys. "_

_" Oh, Peeta. How are you after this new start in the army? " _Gale asked, drying his hair off.

_" I'm pretty sure that I'm okay, thank you for asking. " _Peeta answered. _" Finnick and I actually talked about some things regarding the Capitol operation. "_

_" Oh yeah, you're right. We wanted to talk to you about that. "_

_" What is it? " _Gale asked, an eyebrow rising on his forehead.

Nor Finnick or Peeta had the opportunity to answer that question as Gale's bracelet shone. The boy looked at it and sighed, settling down his towel on his shoulder.

_" Guess we'll have to talk about it later. Beetee apparently needs me. " _

_" No problem. We'll have other occasions. " _Peeta said, disappointed.

_" Okay, then, I'll leave first. See you at diner. " _

Gale waved and walked away from the two other boys. Peeta looked at Finnick's face, but his eyes dropped to his hands, covered in wounds and dried blood. He swallowed with difficulty and quickly looked away, not wanting to embarrass his friend.

_" Then, shall we take our showers? " _Finnick asked, smiling.

_" Oh, sure. "_

They showered slowly, taking their time under the tepid water. Peeta got lost in thoughts again, and tried to shake them away. But he kept remembering things about his nightmare, and it wasn't helping. What did it mean? Maybe was he afraid that Snow could change Katniss. He sighed. There was no way Katniss would give up to that man, she was stronger than that. He cleaned himself and exited the cabin, feeling dizzy from the heat. Finnick was already in front of the mirrors, tying his hair up on his head, and it put a smile on Peeta's face.

_" Finally falling for me there Peeta? " _Finnick laughed. _" You'll start drooling soon if you keep staring at me like that you know. " _

_" W-what?! " _Peeta stuttered, shaking his head vividly.

_" Ha, ha, your reactions are the best! " _Finnick said, holding his sides.

Peeta smiled and settled his tiny grey bag on the counter next to Finnick. He wasn't looking any better than he was in the morning. Huge bags under his eyes, eyes that seemed smaller than usual. Skin that seemed to be yellow, dry and cut lips. He sighed and brushed his hair as well. Finnick started whistling and somehow Peeta felt like they could find a way to get the girls back. There had to be a way.

_" We'll succeed… You know that Finnick? "_ Peeta said, his head down.

_" Uh? " _Finnick muttered, surprised.

_" The girls… They are going to be with us in here. "_

_" Sure they will. " _Finnick smiled.

Not a single world was exchanged in the bathrooms after that. The two boys left together and walked around the District in a perfect silence. None of them felt uncomfortable with that. So much had happened during the day that they didn't want to bring a new subject up.

_" Hey, Peeta! Peeta! " _A girly voice shouted.

The blond boy turned around and saw Primrose running in their direction. She didn't stop running and bumped into him. She then pulled him in a tight hug. Peeta didn't know what that was for, but he couldn't careless. These signs of affection were a things he always had a lack with. He didn't really know how to behave in those kind of situations, but it was alright, with them at least.

_" Hey there you, what is going on? "_

_" You have to come to my room. I finished marking the pages just as you said! "_

_" Oh, but we can just wait in front of your door you know. " _Peeta smiled, caressing the top of the girl's head.

" But… It's really okay you know. "

Peeta smiled and nodded, letting Primrose show them the way to her room. Actually, it was a double chamber as her mother slept there too. It was a level down from where both Finnick and Peeta stayed, but the corridors were just as identical. Grey, unwelcoming, sad and depressing. The girl's blonde hair flew behind her as she walked fast towards the last door of one corridor.

_" I'm not sure I should come in too… " _Finnick muttered.

Prim stared at the taller blond in the eyes for a while. Finnick ran a nervous hand through his hair and the girl's eyes widened. She squealed as she pulled both boys in her room. She closed the door behind her and sighed.

_" Of course you can come in. I have to take care of that. " _Prim said, pointing at Finnick's hands.

_" Oh that! Don't worry about it, it's nothing much. " _Finnick said, laughing awkwardly.

_" How can it be nothing? What if it gets infected? " _Prim groaned, guiding the boy towards a chair.

Peeta mouthed a "thank you" in Finnick's back and the girl nodded, opening the top drawer of her nightstand. From there, she pulled out some bandages, some kind of a cloth and a tiny bottle full of a red liquid. Finnick side-eyed the little thing that Prim just settled next to her.

_" What is that? " _Peeta asked, out of curiosity.

_" A hand-made anesthetic. " _Prim said, sitting across Finnick._ "My mom and I used to prepare our medicines ourselves back in 12. "_

_" I see. "_

_" Now give me your palms. I have to clean the wounds first. "_

Finnick did as he was told obediently. He watched Katniss' sister little fingers stretching his skin to look for anything that shouldn't be there. The girl nodded and took out a tweezer, and used it to pull out some residues that got stuck in the bigger cut. The boy whined a little but it didn't last long enough for him to complain. Prim opened the bottle of drug and poured some on the cloth, imbibing it.

_" I can't promise you that it won't hurt. Just bear with it a little bit okay? " _Prim said, in a soft voice.

_" That's not a problem, really. " _Finnick said.

She put the cloth over her index and started to wipe it over every single cut and wound that covered Finnick's hands. The boy bit his lower lip. After a few minutes, the entirety of his hands was bright red, and Prim put the cloth in the dirty laundry basket. Then, she took the bandage and applied it very carefully on each hand. She put some rubber on it and checked if it was fixed.

_" Then, it's done. " _Prim said, putting back everything in the drawer and closing it.

_" Thank you very much Primrose… " _

_" Don't call me that. Just Prim is enough. " _Prim said, smiling.

Finnick smiled back and nodded. Katniss' little sister then opened another drawer and put out the notebook Peeta saw before. The girl caressed the leather cover and looked at Peeta, cheeks pink.

_" There you go. Please take your time. "_

_" Thank you very much. " _Peeta said. _" But will it be okay? Where will you write for the time being? "_

_" Oh don't worry about it. I've got some sheets of paper from school. I'll just copy it when you give it back. " _Prim assured, smiling.

_" Okay. And I'm sorry, but all I can do is black and white… " _Peeta sighed.

Prim laughed and Finnick joined her. Peeta had no idea what it was about. But seeing these two happy and getting along was really a thing he could enjoy at the moment.

_" Peeta, you're always putting others before you, that's incredible! " _Finnick laughed.

_" What are you talking about? " _Peeta asked, kinda lost.

_" You're so generous, Peeta. It's actually cute. " _Finnick added, laughing harder.

In the end, the three of them ended up laughing for a while, forgetting about anything else for the time being. Peeta wished Katniss could be here to enjoy that kind of moment too. This simple thought stopped his laughter and he readjusted his uniform, uneasy and depressed again.

_" I guess we'll leave now Prim. See you later. " _Finnick said, patting the girl's head gently.

_" Okay. Please come back if the bandages go off, if it hurts or if the bleeding starts again. " _Prim said in a hassle as the boys were already out of her room.

_" I sure will. " _Finnick assured, waving.

_" See you at dinner Prim. "_ Peeta added.

The two boys walked away from Prim's room and headed back to the elevator. Finnick checked his bracelet and smiled. He had nothing planned for the rest of the day, well at least, for the time being.

_" You have something to do? " _Peeta asked.

_" No, not a single thing before dinner. How cool is that? " _Finnick answered, smiling.

_" Somewhere you want to go? "_

_" I was thinking about our bench, but let's just watch TV for a while if you want to. "_

_" Sure. It has been a while since I've done it. To be honest, I'm afraid of what I could see. " _Peeta confessed, his head low.

Finnick patted his back, and smiled gently. He nodded and they took place in the elevator, the taller blond typing on the level's button. They remained silent, just like before Prim came in and took them to her room. Just like that time, it was calm and both boys enjoyed this lack of noise.

_" That means we won't have to meet on our bench before we go to the Grand Hall tonight too. " _Finnick said, smiling.

_" Days like that are kinda enjoyable. " _Peeta added, nodding.

_" You're the person I'm the most comfortable with in here. It's sort of strange when you remember that we were supposed to kill each other in the arena about two months ago. "_

_" You're right. " _Peeta admitted, smiling.

But two months already? Peeta's heart was suddenly so heavy that it was hurting him. Katniss had been in Snow's hands for that long… He couldn't wait to finally launch the Capitol operation and get her back. It was his only objective, and he was not going to fail her again, no matter what she could say about him on television. The boys finally arrived in the TV room, and there was a show, as usual hosted by Ceasar Flickerman, running. Even thought the President of Panem decided himself to cancel the 76th Hunger Games, he obviously wanted to remind everyone that it was the only exception.

_" What Katniss did, without even wanting it, was sure a crazy thing… " _Finnick said, sitting on a chair next to the smaller blond.

Peeta couldn't help his reaction. He tightened up, his hist automatically turning into fists. He didn't know what he was angry about. Him not being able to die to let Katniss live, Finnick's straight-forwardness, or Ceasar Flickerman screaming annoying things on television.

_" But for the first time in forever, both parents and children won't have to worry about a reaping. " _Finnick added. _" Now, that is a revolution. "_

On the TV screen, the boys could see Ceasar Flickerman alone, saying that none of the "lost" tributes from the Quarter Quell had been found at the moment. Finnick laughed at that comment, but Peeta didn't, he knew they were trying to find a way to get to them.

" Since Katniss' intervention on this own stage, it seems that the rebels quiet down and brought forward the meaning of what is happening in Panem. The girl who was on fire sure **was** on fire. Now, she is the one initiating this peace movement in the whole country, she wants the fire to turn to ashes. "

Peeta swallowed with difficulty, Finnick turning towards him and setting a hand on his shoulder, then squeezing it.

_" Don't give a damn about that. We're about to get them back, then we'll see what Ceasar Flickerman will have to say. "_ Finnick said, smiling.

_" We still hadn't talk to Gale about the issues we found in our plan. Nor did we tell Coin about it. " _Peeta sighed.

_" You're right, but we will. " _Finnick answered. _" I'm sure the squad will have to go to the Commandment Center before the Nust operation. "_

Peeta nodded. They stayed in the TV room until the hour for the Nuts' list to be released came. They made their way to the Grand Hall together, joining a lot of soldiers, probably hoping they will be part of it. The queue in front of the main doors was huge, and almost reached the elevator. It seemed like there was a small screen with the names of the soldiers that were picked for the operation. After fifteen minutes, the boys were finally in front of it.

_" Please find below the list of the members of the squad that will be part of the Nuts operation two days from now. _

_\- Paylor_

_\- Cressida_

_\- Gale Hawthorne_

_\- Finnick Odair_

_\- Jackson_

_\- Peeta Mellark_

_\- Castor_

_\- Pollux_

_\- Boggs "_

The boys sighed in sync, both releaved to be part of it. The list was the same than the one for the Capitol one. Except they were going to be nine. Peeta remembered hearing some other names a few hours earlier. Anyway, it was going to be a good preparation for the Capitol intervention. The two soldiers walked back to the elevator.

_" I'm still not okay with Gale's way of thinking… About the bombing. "_

_" I'm with you on that… " _Finnick sighed.

Peeta was going to try all he could to change Gale's mind about his strategy, but he was sure it would lead nowhere. Or maybe it would make Katniss' best friend dislike him once again. But he just couldn't not try to do something.

**NDA: Okay so I'm late, once again.**

**I'm really sorry, but I've been re-writing the old chapters.**

**As you will see, I changed the writing style, and sticked to the regular one as one of my reviewer criticized the "-" thing.**

**I have to repost every single chapter, so it will take some time. Plus, I'm busy in college.**

**Well, see you in the next chapter guys, thanks again for reading me.**

**Bisous.**


	24. Chapter 24 : You can do it, just relax

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 24: You can do it, just relax**

Peeta and Finnick made their way to their room, and agreed on taking their showers simultaneously. They met in front of the bathrooms and headed towards available cabins. This smaller blond sighed as he rubbed the blue ink on his wrist, erasing his schedule for the day. As he soaped himself up, his eyelids were so heavy that he had to fight not to fall asleep under the tepid water. Once he was done, he dried himself, got in his pajamas and left his cabin, his toothbrush between his teeth.

_" I'm totally exhausted. I'm heading to bed right when we're done. " _He sighed.

_" I was going to suggest the exact same thing anyway Peeta. This was a long day. " _Finnick said, nodding.

They left the showers soon after that, waving at each other, and Peeta didn't have to wait to fall asleep. And it had been a long time since that kind of thing happened to him. He could bear with it in the future, as it allowed him to forget about the situation they were drowning in.

After a good sleep without nightmares, which was exceptional, Peeta woke up. His alarm clock was ringing, so he stopped it and yawned. He ran a hand through his messy hair and got up, stretching his back. He changed into his uniform and put his hand against the wall, waiting for his schedule to appear. A look at his wrist and he knew that right after breakfast, there was a meeting at the Commandment Center. He smiled. They were finally going to have a real, good talk about the operations.

He stopped by the bathroom to arrange his blond hair and headed towards the canteen. Prim was already there, as she always was, and Peeta sat next to her, setting down his tray. The girl was eating a plastic looking egg, apparently reading her notes.

_" Good morning Prim. How are you? " _

_" Peeta. I'm fine. And you? " _She asked before she looked at the boy. _" Well, you look a little bit better than before. Did you finally catch some sleep? " _she asked.

_" I did, thanks for the training. " _The blond said, smiling. _" And I'm glad to see that you're still serious about your studies. " _

_" Of course I am. " _Prim said, nodding.

Peeta took his own egg and chewed on it, disgusted by its texture. It felt as if it was gum, unbreakable. Along with that, the discreet taste it had disappeared as he masticated.

_" Hum. This is disgusting if you ask me… "_ He said, groaning.

_" It sure is. But I'm hungry. " _Prim added, laughing. _" Oh I almost forgot, I wanted to ask you if you had all you needed to illustrate my notebook? "_

The blond smiled. _" I am just fine, don't worry. "_

_" Do you need me to find some things, like paint or brushes? "_

_" Oh no, it's okay. " _he answered. _" But I thought that it would be better if I gave you the book back before I go to the Nuts. "_

_" Right. It's tomorrow, isn't it? " Prim asked, not looking at the boy._

_" Yes. I will give it to you at dinner. "_

The boy had this feeling that Katniss' little sister could be afraid of them not coming back after it. He pushed that thought away. Prim nodded and they finished their breakfast tranquilly, chatting and laughing. Peeta thought it was a really good way to start a day, talking with her. Gale joined them, and Peeta thought it was the opportunity to tell him about what Finnick said the day before.

_" Hi Gale. "_

_" Peeta. How are you? " _The boy asked, apparently tired.

_" I'm fine thanks. " _The blond answered, setting down his glass of soya milk. _" Finnick and I wanted to talk about things to you, remember? "_

Katniss' best friend looked up at him. _" Sure. What is it about? "_

_" The Capitol operation. How are we going to get the girls? I mean, Snow won't just handle them. "_

_" I guess that we'll see that with President Coin during meetings Peeta. " _Gale answered, sighing. _" Was there something else? "_

_" Hum… Actually yes. If we get them, how do we get back here, in 13? "_

Gale closed his eyes and then turned completely towards Peeta, that was waiting for an answer. When the blond saw Katniss' best friend's face, he didn't find the expression he thought he would. Gale seemed upset.

_" Look Peeta. I don't know. And I'm not the one that takes decisions, so wait until we're in the Commandment Center to ask this kind of thing. " _

Peeta nodded and got up, taking his tray with him. He patted Prim's head and excused himself. As he walked away, throwing his plate away, he sighed. Gale and him were worlds apart.

He made his way towards the Commandment Center and entered it. Finnick, Boggs and Coin already there, waiting for the rest of the squads to come. He saluted everyone and took a seat available next to Finnick. After a few minutes, people he met the day before, during the training, started to arrive and settle down. A blond girl just appeared at the door, and Peeta couldn't help but look at her. She obviously came from the Capitol, as a side of her head was shaved to let green tattoos appear. Then, Plutarch Heavensbee arrived as well, and the blond boy had to stop himself from asking the man where he had been, and what he had been up to.

_" I see that everyone is here, just in time. " _Coin started, taking a look at her bracelet. _" All of the people present today are part of the Capitol, the Nuts operation, or are really important to their success. " _She continued, walking slowly. _" Today, we will give you informations regarding the Capitol operation, and right after it, the members of the Nuts' operation will be advised as well. "_

The silver haired woman nodded to Boggs while seating down cross-armed. The black man got up, his tablet thing in his hands as a board slid down the ceiling before Peeta's surprised eyes. A projector, identical as the one Peeta used in the Grand hall, was then turned on by Coin's secondhand.

_" So, this is a map of the Capitol. In blue, are the cells where the girl are supposed to be locked up. " _Boggs said, pointing to the screen. _" In red here, is President Snow's residence. As you see, they are quite far away from each other, which will give us more time. " _He continued, a building now colored in red. _" In green, are where our allies are located, and some of them are going to second you in the last steps of the expedition. There is from 10 to 20 allies in each. " _

The map grew bigger, and was now extended to District 3. Peeta was astonished when he saw the number of nests where their allies were living. After all, they were not going to be only 13, but way more. He sighed and grit his teeth knowing that some of these men and women would die helping them.

_" Not all of them will help you to get to the Capitol, but will give you food supplies, a shelter, weapons or even munitions. Others will provide help on your way back here. " _Boggs continued. _" The ones that are out of your way will serve as distractions, diversions in order to help you get closer to the prisoners or give you time to leave. If the Nuts operation is a success, and it has to be, an hovercraft will be following you, mostly helping you to apprehend enemies. " _Boggs stopped, looking at Gale. _" And soldier Hawthorne will be in it most of the time. He will, just like Paylor and myself, be equipped with a headset to keep in touch with President Coin. "_

Peeta couldn't help but think that Gale was really important to both 13 and the president. It seemed like he really got her trust. Coin nodded, and thanked Boggs. The woman was now standing in front of the map of the Capitol. She smiled and clapped her hands together, walking in front of the squads' members.

_" Along with all of that, Mr Latier and soldier Hawthorne are almost finished with the bombs they were working on. Same goes for soldier Mellark's, soldier Odair's and Hawthorne's special weapons. " _Coin explained. _" A meeting will be settled every day in here, and it will last from an hour to four hours. Members of the squad, if they still take lessons, will be excused, and forced to come in here. " _She continued. _" The classroom number 10 is now at your entire disposition, and you should use it as you wish, wether it's to talk about strategy, to get to know each other or deepen the plan. "_

Peeta was quite surprised that Coin came to think about this sort of thing. He thought that she wouldn't matter about them really getting to know the other members of the squad. It had to be the first time President Coin surprised him in a good way.

_" You will be able to access the Hangar anytime from today on, in addition to your actual training. And you should use it as much as you can. Same goes for the Center of militaries' strategy or the classroom I just mentioned. " _Coin continued. _" After every meeting in here, that I won't be able to attend sometimes, you'll have to give me a small report, in order to keep me in touch. " _she finished. _" Is there any question? "_

Silence in the room answered the President's question and she nodded, not walking anymore. Then, she invited every non-member of the Nuts operation to leave, telling them that they'll have to come in the Commandment Center the next day. About ten people left and Coin sat in a chair in front of the remaining people.

_" The operation is tomorrow. We will leave at 8:30 in the morning, and if you're late, you'll stay here. Did I make it clear? " _she said, in a menacing tone. _" We'll meet right here at 8:15 and head towards the garage, where we'll take an hovercraft. The Capitol's seal is on it, and inside, you'll find peacemakers' uniforms. You will have to wear them. No exception. "_

Peeta never thought of this option, but it was really smart. Nobody around the Nuts, even peacemaker themselves, could question their arrival like that.

_" I will send a message to a part of our allies in the Nuts, telling them to slowly get closer to the escape Mr Hawthorne, Paylor and I decided will be the only escape left. " _The grey haired woman explained, looking at Peeta. _" Soldier Hawthorne will take the commands of the hovercraft, and bomb the mountains around the Nuts. The others will part in two groups. The smaller one will stay close to the plane after the bombing, protecting it, to assure your come back. The other one, along with a few soldiers I chose to add to the team, will cover the Nuts' entrance. " _She stopped.

Peeta didn't want to be forced to shoot people. But he was the one that volunteered to be part of both squads. He couldn't back off, he didn't have a choice. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and waited for any other information to come.

_" You'll shoot on every single person getting out of the Nuts. Our allies will make the three fingers sign right on their heart. If they don't, you will shoot them. "_

_" I'm with you on that. " _Plutarch said, nodding. _" If there is any hesitation, you could be the ones with a bullet in your head. " _

_" What if our allies are wounded and can't do the sign properly? " _Peeta asked. _" Shouldn't we give them the benefit of doubt? "_

_" No. It's them or you. Or your teammates. " _Coin answered right away, not even looking at him.

Peeta clenched his jaw and stared at his feet, upset that he couldn't make a change. He couldn't spare innocent lives. He was powerless, and even thought Coin's words made sense, he couldn't bring himself to agree with her decision.

_" Once the building is cleared, you'll have to block the entry, in a definitive way. " _Coin stated, putting her hands down on the table, taking a look at every person present. _" Soldier Hawthorne can do it from the hovercraft, but then you'll have to be in it and leave right after it's done, " _she paused, looking at the ceiling. _" Which means that right after the place is cleared, you will have to run to the hovercraft. And if you don't make it in time, you'll have to stay over there. "_

The blond boy wanted to deny it. Was he the only one thinking about all the possibilities of events? He bit his lower lip and adjusted himself on his chair, his available leg moving on its own accord, due to sudden anger. A shaking hand pushed on the leg, trying to stop any movement coming from the jolt of his muscles, but it wasn't efficient at all.

_" And what if… " _He started, his voice low and restrained. _" What if one of us needs help to get back to the hovercraft? '"_

Coin had her head tilted to her left, a sly smile at the corner of her snaky, lies-telling mouth. Plutarch seemed upset and looked like he was arguing with someone, mumbling things to himself.

_" Do we just let him die just to be sure to get in the hovercraft? Or do we stay by his side and watch our team go away without us? " _He asked, his voice now shaking.

_" You will simply have to choose the option that will not wake you up every night from guilt. " _The president chanted, smirking. _" I can not answer this question for you. " _She added, seating down. _" And if you're the wounded one… I guess it will depend on the rest of your squad's decisions. "_

Peeta's eyebrows were twitching, and now he was dead sure about a thing concerning the woman right in front of him. She didn't care about any of them, not even a single bit. He knew that she saw them as some kind of tools that could help her to finally reach that power she desperately wanted to own. The only thing that mattered to her, was herself. She tried to hide it behind some formal speeches and casual decisions, but Peeta couldn't miss it. It made his stomach turn in an awful way, forcing him to bend on his chair. Thinking about that brought all his other insecurities around, and he felt totally sick. It was a mix of all he hated, all he tried to get away from, that forced its way in his head. He closed his eyes, trying to calm down, to still allow his lungs to let some air in.

_" Hey there buddy, are you alright?! " _A voice to his left said. _" Can you hear me? "_

He held his belly, bitting his lower lip, trying to focus on the operation, and not on the person that was organizing it, not on the people that would die during it, because of it. He looked up, but black dots were blocking his view.

He had to be strong for Katniss, and that was the only thing he was able to do anyway. He had to do that for her. So why couldn't he just calm down and act up, bearing with this shit for a bit longer? He groaned, chocking on his breath as nausea built up inside of his system.

_" I think he's not feeling well, " _Coin stated, pouting. _" Take him to the bathrooms. "_

The blond's vision was almost blurred, and sounds were more distant with every passing second. He felt someone wrap his own arm around his shoulder and drag him out of the room. He thought about Katniss again, but it didn't help him. The door closed behind him and the person helping him, and he finally managed to pronounce something.

_" I have to throw up… " _He warned the person. _" Should hurry. " _

_" Okay, alright. Just bear with it a little longer okay? " _The person calmly said.

He couldn't remember how they got in a toilet cabin, but when he regained consciousness, he was puking his breakfast. A warm hand was rubbing his back, as a voice told him that he was doing good, and that everything had to go out.

_" Finnick…? " _Peeta asked, his head in the dish. _" Thanks… "_

Peeta had no idea how long they stayed in the cabin, but he felt sore and dirty when he finished vomiting. He managed to get up, his available leg shaking under his weight, and Finnick guided him to the washbasin. There, he cleaned his mouth and tried to clear his head.

_" Are you feeling better? " _Finnick asked, frowning.

Peeta nodded. _" Yeah… Thank you very much. "_

_" You should go rest in your room, so you'll be ready for tomorrow, okay? " _Finnick said, smiling._ " If you need anything, my bedroom is not far, you know it. Don't hesitate. "_

The smaller blond nodded again, feeling completely exhausted and sick. He hugged the other boy and made his way towards his bedroom. His pajamas were on top of his bed, but he just threw them on the chair of his desk and curled up on his bed, in his uniform, without removing his shoes. The green of the room was getting on his nerves and he just wanted to rend the wallpaper. Turning to lie on his belly, he realized that his whole body was trembling and that he was sweating a lot. Closing his eyes, he focused on his breathing, wanting to avoid getting lost in the depressed world that grew in his head.

But he couldn't help his brain, his mind, to harass him with Katniss, the operations, the coming war, the rebellion, District 13, Coin. He had trouble breathing, his hands tightly closed around his grey sheets, pulling on them as if they wanted to shed holes into it. He whimpered, tears falling on his cheeks, and managed to let go of the handful of fabric he was holding in his right hand, then forced himself to sit up.

_" Come on Peeta… " _He told himself. _" You can do it, just relax. " _

His body started wobbling and swinging on its own. He bit the inside of his cheeks and tried to think of a moment he could hold onto to stop his panic attack. He moaned as his fingers closed around the edge of his bed, clutching the cheap material in his palms. Everything he thought about seemed to somehow lead to another memory, and ended up depressing him. After a few minutes of standing still, eyes shut closed, the muscles in his arms relaxed. He could hear Katniss' voice in his head asking_ ' Will you stay with me?'. _He opened his eyes, his breath getting slower and more regular.

_" Always… " _he sighed. _" Always. "_

Peeta had stopped shaking and could now breathe normally. Still, he was covered in sweat and his throat was aching. He knew that Primrose might have some medicine that could help it, but didn't want to worry her. He took another few minutes to completely let go of the tension that built in his entire body, and laid back on his bed. The physical pain was almost gone, but the worst wasn't visible on the outside, but slowly, inch by inch, rooting inside of his head. Even thought he was smiling and laughing in 13, he couldn't avoid the fact that he got more depressed with every new day. And it all started when he woke up in the hovercraft. From that moment on, he had never really been able to accept the fact that he was still alive. He felt tears roll down his face, and didn't try to stop them, just totally giving in. Peeta hated to feel so weak, so sensitive. He was exhausted, he wanted to rest, but at the same time he wanted to do things, to fight. How useless, how lost, how pitiful could he be?

After he calmed down, he took a towel and a clean uniform, willing to take a good shower to really cool his head. The amount of time he spent under the water could have been a full hour, he didn't even know, but he needed it. Just thinking that Primrose could have seen him in that state drove him crazy, he couldn't break like that. He didn't have the right to. He dried up, changed, and left the bathrooms, throwing his sweaty uniform away. He was still nauseous, but he wanted to show Coin that he was totally capable of going to the Nuts the next day. He stopped by his room to put down his bathing bag and left, the door locking behind him.

_" Oh Peeta, are you okay? " _A voice asked in the boy's back.

Peeta turned, _" Hey Finnick. Yes, I'm better. Thanks again for looking after me. " _he said, nodding.

_" Where are you going like that?" Finnick asked._

_" I thought that I should have a talk with President Coin, just to make sure I'm still going tomorrow. " _Peeta answered.

Finnick nodded, and told the other boy that he wanted to find him, he would be in the library. They took the elevator together. They didn't talk, then Peeta exited the machine, turned around and waved at Finnick. He walked towards the Commandment Center and gave it three knocks, then waited for someone to open the door.

_" Soldier Mellark. What brings you here? " _Coin asked, a hand on the door.

_" I just wanted to ask you if I was still part of the Nuts' operation. " _The boy explained. _" Am I? "_

The grey haired smiled. _" What made you think that I would retire you? "_

_" What happened earlier. " _He answered, clenching his jaw.

The president invited him to come inside the room, and guided him towards a chair, where the blond boy sat. She sat across him, cross-legged.

_" What was it about? " _she asked him. _" Were you sick when you woke up? "_

Peeta hesitated. _" Not really. " _

_" What is that supposed to mean? " _

The boy swallowed. _" It's just that suddenly, I felt sick. "_

" Yes. Of course. " Coin answered, rolling her eyes. _" If you can not even think about killing people, how are you going to do when you'll have to? " _She asked.

Peeta tried to stay composed, but Coin saw right through him. The fact that he got his place back in her army because of a trick, and that she allowed him to go even when she thought he was more useful in 13, made him worry. After what happened, she could totally count him out of the Nuts' operation, and maybe even of the Capitol's one.

_" It wasn't about that. I really don't know where that came from. " _He answered.

_" Sure. You don't know… " _Coin said, staring at the boy.

_" I assure you that I don't know what happened. I just didn't feel right. " _The boy added.

The grey haired woman smiled. _" You are still part of both interventions. " _She stated. _" Just try not to be a burden to the other members. "_

The blond boy nodded. He felt as if she was trying to discourage him, to bring him down. Maybe was she really willing to get rid of him. Peeta pushed that thought away and thanked Coin. He got up and left. A part of him really wanted to join Finnick, but the other one wanted to avoid crowded places. His feet lead him towards the last level, where he laid on the bench.

* * *

**NDA:**

**Hey guys, for once I'm not late, but early he he!**

**This chapter was a pleasure to write, and I wanted to really show that Peeta was struggling and covering it since he got in 13.**

**Hope you liked it, and see you in chapter 25!**

**bisous. :)**


	25. Chapter 25 : Make it back

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 25: Make it back**

Peeta fell asleep on the bench, and realized that he got up in time for lunch. He got up, stretched and made his way towards the cafeteria. As he walked away from the elevator, a hand settled on his shoulder, making him stop and turn.

_" Hey Peeta. Were you with Coin all this time? " _Finnick asked. _" I thought you'd come see me in the library. "_

_" No, I didn't, I guess I needed a little time alone. " _Peeta said, kinda embarrassed. _" It's nothing personal. "_

_" Don't worry it's okay. I was just worried. "_

They entered the canteen and parted, Peeta joining his table where Gale, Prim and her mother were already eating. He put down his tray and stared down at the things in his plate. Carrots and wheat. His stomach still felt sore from his morning, but he pushed himself and ate his carrots, chewing on them without envy. Gale's mother and sister sat down and Peeta threw his wheat in the small girl's plate, without the guards noticing. Gale nodded at him and smiled.

_" So… You two leave tomorrow right? " _Prim asked. _" Are you prepared? "_

_" Yes, we are. " _Gale answered, helping his sister to eat. _" I think everything will go as planned. "_

_" Alright. " _Prim said smiling. _" Just be careful okay? "_

_" We will, I promise. " _Peeta said, nodding.

Once he was finished with his plate, Peeta exited the cafeteria, and looked down at his wrist, they had a 3 hours long training in the afternoon. He growled, really not feeling like exercising before the Nuts operation. He stopped by his bedroom, took Prim's notebook, the two pen he had, an eraser the stand assistant gave him, and headed towards the classroom number 10. He was glad to see that it was empty, and he settled on a desk, opening the first page of the book. He decided to draw a mockingjay, just like the one on Katniss' pin, and make him hold an arrow in his claws, not in his beak. He spent a lot of time on it, trying to put as many details as he could, and when he looked at his bracelet to check the time, he was late for training.

_" Fuck! "_

He closed the notebook, took the pen, the eraser and ran towards his room. He put Prim's book on his desk and left as fast as he arrived. He took the elevator and came in the hangar running, out of breath, apologizing to Paylor. A look in the massive room made him understand that only the members of the squad were present for the day.

_" I hope you won't be late tomorrow morning too, soldier Mellark. " _She threatened him. _" Now get in the rank. "_

He nodded and joined Finnick. They started an individual training for half an hour, and Peeta already felt exhausted by the end of it. He was crouching, his palms on the floor as he tried to catch up his breath. The taller blond patted him when Paylor yelled that they had to form pairs and cross an installation she made up herself. Naturally, Peeta and Finnick teamed up, and they were the first group to do the exercise, carefully watched by Paylor. They had to walk back to back, then able to oversee more than if they were side by side. The black haired woman congratulated them, and they kept training as the other pairs did the same exercise.

_" They shouldn't make us work out too much… " _Peeta said, breathless. _" Our mission is tomorrow morning. "_

_" Yeah… " _Finnick sighed. _" Aches can't be good. But we don't have our word to say in that. " _He added. _" We're just soldiers. "_

Paylor made them work by more important groups, and after forty five minutes, Peeta was worn out, completely exhausted. That was when Paylor directed them towards the shooting stands. And in bonus, they would have to throw knives and do some first aid training too. Peeta was still excelling in crossbow, and got better at shooting gun, not even knowing how. He wasn't really good at knife throwing, but was doing great at first aid, as Prim taught him about the basics.

After two hours of training, Peeta couldn't see how he could make it through the last one. His available leg was shaking, his muscles were all contracted and he felt as if he couldn't catch up his breath. Paylor told them they had to train their special skill, making the blond sigh of relief.

_" Soldier Mellark, no camouflage today. Go to the sword stand. " _Paylor said, noticing the boy heading towards the smallest stand.

He nodded and changed his direction, growling. He trained alone, and with the assistant, then Paylor ordered some fights, making the blond roll his eyes. He could barely stand, and she wanted them to have one on one fights, perfect.

After losing one fight and winning another, Peeta was on the edge of passing out. His vision was blurry, and he felt dizzy. His swords slipped out of his hand, and he fell down on his knees.

_" Good job! Thanks everyone, see you tomorrow! " _Paylor shouted, clapping her hands.

Finnick joined Peeta, helping him to stand up.

_" Thanks buddy. " _Peeta moaned, all tensed up. _" I'm glad it's over. "_

_" Let's shower, okay? " _Finnick suggested, smiling.

They left the hangar and took their showers simultaneously. Peeta then stayed in his room, trying to draw more things in Prim's notebook. He was at the page where Katniss told Prim about the time she met Peeta. His throat ached, and his eyes hurt as he drew a loaf of bread, half burned on the next page. He added a portrait of Katniss, and had to make a pause.

He stared down at those grey eyes in front of him, shook his head and finished her face. When he was about to start his own portrait, he took a look at his bracelet. It was already diner time, so he left, taking the heavy book in his arms. When he sat down next to Gale, he gave the notebook to Katniss' sister and she giggled. She opened it, and her mouth was wide open when she saw the first page.

_" Wow… Thank you. " _She said, her voice trembling. _" This is… amazing. " _She added, caressing the page, looking at the details.

_" Oh, it's nothing. " _Peeta said, smiling.

_" What is that? " _Gale asked, trying to take a peak at the notebook.

_" Look at what Peeta drew for me! " _Prim said, giggling. _" Isn't it amazing?! "_

_" You sure know how to draw… " _The boy answered in awe. _" Are you doing this for the whole book or something? "_

_" Yes, Prim asked me to. " _Peeta said, nodding.

Katniss' sister kept staring at the drawing, and Peeta started eating his noodles, that were completely tasteless. He groaned but knew he had to go with a full stomach for the operation the next day. Prim flipped a page, the noise making Peeta look at her. Her slender fingers were touching the page where the boy drew the bread, and Katniss' face.

_" It's unbelievable… " _She whispered. _" I'm glad I asked you to do it. " _

_" Really, it's nothing ." _Peeta answered, putting down his fork, embarrassed.

Prim's mother was looking over her daughter's shoulder, and suddenly put her hands over her mouth, a whimper escaping her throat.

_" Peeta… This is… ! " _She put her hand on the page. _" Thank you for doing it… Thank you so much! "_

Peeta was sure he was blushing and embarrassed to death, but he managed to blurt a 'it's nothing, really' and take his fork again, finishing his noodles. Katniss' mom kept saying some thank you and Peeta felt uncomfortable. He didn't deserve any thanks when Katniss was still locked in the Capitol, probably enduring horrible torture and treatments. Peeta was done with his slimy noodles, and wasn't willing to eat anything else, so he slid his pear to Prim, whom rewarded him with a questioning look.

_" Are you leaving? " _She asked, closing her notebook.

Peeta nodded, gritting his teeth. _" Yeah. We have to be gone early… " _He stated, looking down at his tray. _" Better head to my room and try to get some sleep. "_

Prim smiled, nodding. _" Sure. That's the best thing to do I guess. " _She said. _" I'll see you tomorrow, okay? " _

The blond boy looked up at her, she was definitely scared of losing other people that were close to her, Gale, Finnick or himself. He cracked a sad smile and got up. He threw his tray and came back to the table. He hugged Prim from behind, arms closed around her little waist.

_" Of course I'll see you tomorrow. " _He sighed. _" You'll just have to wait for us. "_

Gale nodded. _" Don't worry about us Prim. We'll be alright. " _He stated.

Peeta let go of the little girl, but she turned around and hugged him again. The blond slid a hand in her hair, patting gently as he hugged her back. He heard sobbing, and knelt down so he would be able to see the girl's face. She wasn't looking at him, but he could see tears rolling down her pink cheeks.

_" Hey-hey! … Prim, it's okay. " _he said, his thumbs pushing tears away from her face_" Everything will be okay… "_

She wailed, looking at at Peeta. _" Be careful, all of you. Make it back. "_

_" We will. I promise. " _Peeta said, smiling. _" Now, just try to calm down. "_

She nodded, inhaling deeply. _" Okay… sorry. "_

_" No need to apologize. " _Peeta said, smiling. _" There… " _He took her notebook from the table and handed it to her. _" Just hold on to this… I'm sure we'll be just fine. "_

Prim nodded again, wiped tears away from her face . She smiled at him and told him to be careful again. He promised he would be. The girl turned around and started eating again while Peeta exited the cafeteria. He sighed and ran a hand over his tired face. Halfway to the elevator he crouched down. Seeing Prim like this was unbearable, and he didn't want to make her worry that much. But he wanted to be part of the interventions, he didn't want to back up and willed to succeed, making it back in one piece. He was having an internal fight when someone crouched next to him.

_" Peeta. You alright? " _

The blond looked up, and was surprised to see Haymitch. _" Yeah, yeah… "_

_" Really? You don't look like you are. " _His ex mentor got up, a bottle in his right hand. _" What's bothering you? "_

_" My conscience I guess. " _Peeta sighed, getting up too.

The man in front of him browed him _" Oh yeah? What is it about? "_

Peeta started walking and got in the elevator, Haymitch following him. He didn't give the man an answer, and he didn't insist, which was enjoyable. They got out at the level where both of their rooms were, Haymitch walking in Peeta's steps.

_" I don't mean to annoy you, but can you tell? " _he asked, smiling.

Peeta stopped walking and turned around to face him, _" It's Prim. " _He admitted, walking again.

_" Oh. What did you do? " _The older man said, still at his tail.

Peeta sighed, he didn't even know. _" I don't like to make her worry. "_

_" That doesn't answer my question boy. " _Haymitch stated.

_" I'm just part of the squads. That's what I did. " _He said, opening his room.

Haymitch's eyes opened up, and he stopped on the doorway. Peeta looked at him, smiling. It was awkward, he couldn't really imagine his ex-mentor comforting him about that kind of insecurities at all.

_" If you didn't choose to be part of those interventions, you'd have issues about your conscience too. " _Haymitch said, his head tilting to his right. _" You told us that you had to go. " _He added before taking a few sips from his bottle.

Peeta stared down at his feet. _" I know. But it's still bothering me. " _He sighed, taking a step back in his room. _" Are you coming in or are we having a conversation out in the open? "_

Haymitch laughed and entered Peeta's room. The blond boy sat on his bed while the older one tottered towards his desk, where he fell on the chair. He turned the chair around and offered Peeta some of his beverage.

_" No thanks. Still have a mission tomorrow. " _He said, shaking his head. _" I can't exactly afford a hangover. " _

Haymitch laughed again. _" Right… You're a good kid uh? Really serious and all. " _He said, almost giggling. _" I'd like to be like that… I just can't, you know. " _

Peeta directed his eyes towards the man in front of him. He remembered how Katniss and him blamed Haymitch for drinking instead of giving them advises, but with some retreat, they couldn't put it on him. The man had to mentor a bunch of kids, and none of them made it out of the arena. He had to do this every year, sending those children to die without being able to change anything about it.

_" I know you can't… And I understand that. " _Peeta sighed. _" I just don't want to cause trouble to people around me. "_

_" Sure you don't. " _Haymitch stated, smiling. _" You're so… " he stopped, apparently searching for a word, " Honest. And I don't mean it in a bad way. That means we can actually trust you. "_

The boy had no idea how to answer to that, but he nodded and thanked Haymitch. He pulled up his pants and took a look at his fake leg. It wasn't as heavy as it seemed, but it was still not very practical to walk with it. The man in front of him smiled sadly.

_" I'm really sorry about that Peeta. " _He said, levering his bottle.

The boy looked up at him, clueless, _" It's not your fault. You even got to send us medicine, " _he said, smiling. _" We just had to use Katniss' tourniquet to kill Cato. "_

He swallowed and put down his grey pants, covering his leg. Haymitch then drank silently, mumbling things to himself. Peeta was tired, his muscles were sore from his training. A look at his alarm clock told him it was past 9 PM, so he didn't kick out Haymitch.

_" You sure you don't wanna drink? " _He asked, shaking the half empty bottle in front of Peeta's eyes. _" Just a sip won't kill ya! "_

_" No, really. " _He laughed. _" But thanks. " _

Peeta knew it was his ex-mentor's way of being gentle and kind, so he didn't chase him out of his room. Instead, he talked with the man until his bottle was totally empty, making him growl. Haymitch staggered on the chair, Peeta wondering how he managed to do that, and made his bottle fall.

_" Erm I-I'm sorry Peeta. I'm leaving now, " _Haymitch stuttered, getting up on unsteady feet. _" Try to get some rest here. "_

_" Sure. " _Peeta said, helping the man out of his room. _" Take care and see you tomorrow Haymitch. "_

The man giggled and waved before turning away, closing Peeta's door and headed to God knew where. He settled his alarm clock on 7:15, scared to be late. The blond boy sighed, and laid down on his bed, stretching his back in the process. Before he got a chance to fall asleep, he changed into his night clothes and got under his covers. He closed his heavy eyelids, but couldn't help but noticing how fast his heart was beating in his chest. He inhaled deeply and tried to find a comfortable position. All he could think about was the operation coming the next morning, and how things could go wrong. After minutes of worrying, his tiredness got over his doubts.

His alarm clock rang, making him whimper and hit it with a close fist. Peeta yawned and sat up, pushed his covers and got up. His muscles were hurting him with almost every move, and he blamed Coin for pushing a training on them the day before. He took a towel, his washing grey bag and exited his bedroom, heading for the bathrooms. He took a warm shower, massaging his shoulders and arms in an attempt to lessen his pain. Once he was done, he dried himself and got in a new uniform, knowing that he would have to get rid of it soon, as they were all going to be dressed as peacemakers. He closed his belt, noticing how much weight he lost since he got in 13, and stopped by his room to get rid of his bag. It was only 7:40, but he headed towards the canteen anyway.

_" Prim? " _He asked, with a cracking noise in his voice. _" You're up already? "_

The girl turned to face him, _" Peeta! " _She got up and ran towards him. _" Peeta… "_

_" Do you have an early lesson today? " _He asked, hugging her.

_" Yes. But I also wanted to try to see you. " _She admitted, clutching him in her arms. _" And Gale too… But he didn't show up. "_

Peeta smiled and excused himself. He took his tray and joined her at their table, where they were the only ones present. Basically, it was almost just the two of them in the whole cafeteria. Today was toasts, a yogurt and a glass of apple juice. Peeta's stomach growled and Prim laughed as she licked her spoon clean.

_" Can you stay here until you leave? " _She asked.

Peeta nodded. _" I can do that. " _He said, noticing the notebook on Prim's tray. _" Were you able to catch up? "_

_" Yes. " _She said, smiling. _" Your drawings are really fantastic. "_

_" But there's only two of them. " _Peeta stated. _" But if you give it to me tonight, I promise I'll fill it up faster. "_

_" You know… I don't think you'll have the time to really finish it. " _She said, her voice low and quiet as she caressed the leather cover of her book.

The boy froze. He didn't understand what she meant by that. Did she think he was going to be killed? Just the thought of it made a shiver run down his spine, of pure terror. He shook his head slightly and bit one of his toasts.

_" Why do you say that? " _he asked, his voice shakier that he wanted it to be.

Prim looked up at him, _" The Capitol operation will be launched soon after the one today. " _she said, taking a sip of her apple juice. _" It's only logic. You won't have the time to draw a lot with your trainings and all. "_

Peeta couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief at the girl's words. His whole body relaxed instantly while he opened his yogurt. He took a spoonful of it and smiled, patting Prim's head with his other hand. The girl jotted at the gesture, but calmed down and leaned in the boy's touch.

_" But I'll be pretty happy with what you'll be able to do since then. " _She said. _" And when Katniss will be back, I'll show it to her, " _she smiled, opening her book on its first page. _" Then maybe she will remember who you really are. "_

Tears were on the edge of falling out as emotion came in waves in Peeta. She was right, Katniss had doubts about him and might never trust him again. He almost forgot that detail, focusing on rescuing her and pulling up a plan that could work. He shook his head vividly, this was not the point. It was the last of his problem, and obviously the last of his teammates' too. He couldn't break down for this reason, because there was no way he could change it anyway.

_" You're right. That's a good idea. " _He told her, pulling a toast to his mouth. _" I didn't even think about it, you're clever. " _

_" This was the reason I wanted you to draw illustrations in my journal. " _She added, smiling. _" But it was also because I heard from Katniss that you had a real talent. " _

Words were stuck in Peeta's throat, and he had no idea how to answer it. He remembered when he was in the Capitol, getting ready for the Games, painting some tree motif on his arms and hands. Katniss looked kinda amazed by what he could do with a few brushes and some paint. It was one of those few times where he felt precious under her stare, and he knew he couldn't forget about it. Nobody could shake those memories away.

They stayed in the cafeteria until Peeta needed to leave and get to the Commandment Center to leave for the Nuts. Coin had obviously already been there for a while, running in circles and waiting for the members to arrive bit by bit.

He gave two strong knocks on the door, and she was there, along with Gale, Paylor, Boggs, Finnick and the blond girl named Cressida. So Gale didn't have any breakfast? Oy maybe did he eat very early?

_" Good morning soldier Mellark. " _She said, bowing her head. _" You can take a seat while we wait for the others to arrive. "_

And that was exactly what he did, he sat between Finnick and Cressida and waited. Coin wanted silence, so he couldn't really discuss his plans about this operation with his friend.

* * *

**NDA :**

**Here I am with the 25th chapter.**

**Things are going to escalate quickly from then, I can assure you.**

**Since I'm on a break from college, I'll try to give you two or three chapters next week. Not saying I will succeed tho.**

**Hope you enjoyed it,**

**See you in the next chapter,**

**Bisous. :)**


	26. Chapter 26 : It's them or us, remember?

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 26 : It's them or us, remember?**

They had to wait until 8:13 to leave to the garage, and to get to the hovercraft that would lead them to the Nuts. As they entered it and took place on the seats, Coin cleared her throat, getting everyone's attention on her.

_" I hope I'll see all of you come back down from this same plane. Good luck soldiers, " _she said solemnly before getting off the hovercraft, followed by guards.

Boggs clapped his hands,_ " Alright, before fastening any seat belt, we have to change into those peacemaker's outfits, "_ he announced. _" Quick. "_

Peeta did as he was told, side eyeing the seats of the hovercraft. He had been sitting in those too much for his own sake, and it only reminded him of the Games. It gave him conviction to finish this, so no more kids would have to sit in those to get to an arena.

_" Can we stay out of our helmets for now? " _Cressida asked, looking at the thing in question on her lap. _" Maybe it can wait? "_

Paylor sighed, _" Sure, sure. " _She said, nodding vaguely and heading towards the cabin where Gale was preparing the plane, _" Are we ready to go soldier Hawthorne? "_

_" We are. Make sure they are back there too, " _he said, motioning to the rest of the squad in his back.

_" Fasten your seat belts soldiers, we're leaving 13. " _Paylor shouted.

The blond boy nodded and did it, wondering what a seat belt could do for your life in a plane crash. Nothing, obviously. The journey to the Nuts was quiet and boring, as no talking was allowed except for questions regarding the operation itself. After a long time, the hovercraft slowed down its course, and Gale warned that they were about to land.

_" Put on your helmets, and be efficient, " _Boggs shouted. _" Soldiers Mellark, Odair, Cressida, Pollux, you will go close to the Nuts. You'll be in charge of killing any person related to the Capitol and save as many rebels as you can. " _He yelled, in a rushed voice. _" Paylor and I will stay here to supervise. Soldiers Hawthorne, Castor and Jackson will stay here to make sure the hovercraft stays ours._

Peeta nodded, gritting his teeth. Of course he had to be part of that group. He put the helmet on, and thought about those guys who had to wear those heavy things every day, in addition to obey Snow's orders. He got up, and took a gun that looked pretty similar to the peacemaker's one. The President of 13 thought about everything.

They got out in line, Peeta second, right behind Finnick. They walked straight until they got close enough to the Nuts to look for any real peacemakers, but far enough so Gale's hit won't hurt them. They waited patiently for something to happen.

_" Watch out! " _Someone yelled.

The four of them got down, crouching so they wouldn't be affected by the detonation of the bombs. Suddenly, Peeta's ears were ringing as dust flew all around him. He was lost, having a hard time catching his breath as voices started to get closer. A second, then a third and a fourth bomb were dropped, and the ground shook beneath his feet, making his eyes widened as he whimpered, trying to cover his ears without any result due to the helmet. Something close to an earthquake happened, and he realized it was the mountains crashing down around he Nuts. As more dust surrounded him and his teammates, he got up, Finnick forcing him on his feet.

_" It's our turn now Peeta! We have to go! " _he shouted, motioning to what was supposed to be the Nuts' entrance. _" Come on, follow me! "_

Cressida settled a hand on Finnick's shoulder, _" We can't, we don't see a thing! "_

_" We have to go, it's this direction, I swear! " _Finnick insisted, starting to walk.

Another bomb fell, sending the teammates to fly. Finnick got up first, forcing himself on his shaking legs. He asked the rest of the group if they were alright, and they all nodded. Soon, he was walking towards the Nuts. Peeta did his best to follow his friend, his gun ready to shoot at anyone who would act against them. His heart beat was fast, pumping in his ears, as adrenaline ran through his veins, giving him the strength to keep going forward. They made their way slowly and carefully, Pollux watching their backs as Finnick checked if the place was clear every five or six step.

_" Okay, let's keep moving. " _he said, walking faster.

Suddenly, he shot to his right, and Peeta turned automatically, trying to catch a glimpse of somebody, but he didn't, dust surrounding them.

_" I'll cover you, keep going! " _Finnick ordered, firing his gun. _" Just go! "_

Peeta didn't want to leave him alone, but he nodded and started to run as the dust started to be less obstructive as it was before. He heard footsteps behind him, and knew both Cressida and Pollux agreed on Finnick's plan. Screaming voices were getting closer at every step the blond took, so he slowed down, his finger on the gun's trigger, ready to pull it. He saw a man, walking with a hand over his eyes, and aimed at him.

_" Please help us! The Nuts has been attacked! " _The man begged, blood everywhere on his body. _" Please, please! "_

Peeta froze, his index shaking on the trigger as he waited for the man to make the three fingers sign. Cressida pushed him aside, and he fell on his back, letting go of his gun and whining in pain.

_" What are you doing?! " _he yelled, trying to get up again.

_" Our job. He's not on our side, we have to kill him. " _she answered in a calm voice.

The boy's eyes widened behind his darkened helmet as a bullet hit the man in his torso. He screamed as Pollux helped him up and caught him in his arms, waiting for him to calm down. The man in front of them fell in a thud; now dead meat. Peeta tried to get out of Pollux's hold, but the man was too strong. Cressida was standing still, waiting for other people to escape the Nuts.

_" Why did you shoot him?! It was too fast! " _he screamed.

Cressida didn't even glance at him, _" It's them or us, remember? "_

_" He was unarmed! " _Peeta shouted through gritted teeth.

Pollux finally let go of Peeta, and they took their guns back. Peeta walked so he was next to Cressida. The blond was hoping Finnick was alright back there, but focused on his mission, as awful as it was for him. A woman got out, her right leg badly wounded, and Peeta noticed Cressida ready to shoot. He pushed her gun in a smooth move and motioned to the black haired woman. She was doing the three fingers sign.

_" Come over here, hurry! " _Peeta screamed to her. _" Don't be scared, just come! "_

The woman whined but made her way towards them anyway, pulling her wounded leg behind her. She was a few feets away from them when Cressida shot a man right behind her, missing her by a few inches. Peeta's breath was crazy as he walked towards the lady and helped her walking.

_" Just walk straight in this direction, okay? You'll find an hovercraft, just do the three fingers sign once again. " _he said, showing her where to go.

_" Thank you, thank you so much… I-I'll do it. " _she said, nodding.

Peeta turned around and shot a man running in their direction with a knife. Cressida thanked him with a move of her head and kept shooting at more people as Pollux helped allies to get to the hovercraft.

_" Peeta, we have to hurry! " _a man voice said in his back. _" Real peacemakers are getting closer, we don't have much time! "_

The blond nodded to Finnick, that seemed to be alright, minus the blood on his uniform, _" Okay. "_

The boy got to Cressida and explained what was happening. She shrugged and kept shooting, telling him that she understood. Peeta helped two men as they made their way towards the hovercraft. When he got there, Boggs was trying to help the wounded legged woman on the plane as Paylor shot to cover them. The boy noticed the blood trail following the woman, and knew she would die or have to get her leg removed, just like he had to. He shook his head and headed towards Boggs.

_" We have to leave soon. Peacemakers coming, " _he informed him.

Boggs didn't answer, but nodded quickly, _" Go help your teammates, we'll tell you when to come back. " _he ordered.

Peeta nodded and rushed to the rest of the squad, that was having a hard time, peacemakers now getting out of the Nuts, armed just as they were. The uniform trick didn't work very long, as he expected. He took shelter behind a few rocks and shot at them, killing two in the process. He reloaded his gun, and noticed that a young boy was crying, next to the entrance, a hand over his left ear, blood running from it. Peeta swallowed as he couldn't bring himself to shoot. The boy seemed to be around his age, and was covered in dust. When his other hand formed the three fingers sign, Peeta got up, not wanting to leave him there, with a bomb coming anytime soon.

_" Cressida, the boy, I have to get him, he's our ally! " _he said, pointing at him.

The blond woman nodded as she started shooting again, _" Fine, I'll try to cover you. "_

Peeta took a deep breath and ran towards the entrance, shooting all around him on his way. He killed a man that tried to get his hands on the boy, and ran faster. He got to him, and saw that the boy was crying, holding the dead body in his slender arms. What was happening?!

_" Why did you kill him?! " _the boy yelled. _" He was my father, why did you do it?! "_

Peeta froze, staring down at the lifeless corpse, _" I-I'm sorry, I didn't know! You have to come with me now! "_

_" Fuck that! I'll stay right here! " _he shouted back, his face covered in tears. _" You-You killed my father! "_

The blond took hold of one of the boy's arms. The boy screamed, making Peeta turn around and face a peacemaker, a few feet away from him. He swallowed and pulled out his gun, aiming for him. The peacemaker was faster than him, and shot the crying boy in the shoulder, then Peeta in his belly. Peeta cried out, holding his belly, as he stared at the peacemakers. He fell on his knees, trying to cover the boy behind him, his arm still in his hand. The peacemaker aimed for his head, and Peeta closed his eyes. He waited for a bullet, heard a shooting noise, and realized he was still breathing. When he opened his blue eyes, he saw the man lying face down. His whole body shaking, Peeta turned towards the boy again.

_" We have to go now! It's going to explode! " _he yelled to the boy, shaking his arm. _" Come on, let's go! "_

The boy slapped Peeta's hand but he got up and ran towards Cressida and Pollux, a hand on his injured shoulder. He left Peeta next to the entrance, a blinding pain in his belly. The blond grit his teeth and stood up, willing to get back to his teammates. He killed a peacemaker and helped a woman out of the Nuts, as he fought against the pain expanding in his torso. Bullets were flying around him, and he was glad that he didn't get shot another time as he made his way back.

_" Come back now! " _Gale's voice shouted. _" I repeat, come back! "_

Peeta looked back, checking for any other ally that might make it, and spotted a young girl, with black hair and blue eyes making the three fingers sign. _" Go ahead, I'll catch up! "_

_" You have three minutes! " _Gale's voice announced.

The closer he got, the more the girl reminded him of Katniss. It was stupid and crazy, time was precious, but he had to save that girl. He shot a peacemaker on his left, and pulled the girl in his arms. She was shaking, her hands covered in blood, and Peeta noticed this blood wasn't hers, but his.

_" We're leaving, " _he assured her, pushing her towards the hovercraft. _" Come on. "_

The girl nodded, and they got to the plane as fast as they could, the girl helping him to walk. He kept hearing guns shooting in his back, and knew people from the Capitol were getting closer. He turned around and shot blindly.

_" I… I see an hovercraft. " _she said, panting. _" Is that it? "_

_" Yes, keep going! " _he answered, focused on people running towards them.

_" Peeta, are you okay?! " _Finnick yelled, coming next to him, shooting too.

The blond nodded, _" Yeah I'm alright! Let's leave now! "_

The two boys kept shooting until they got in the plane and the door closed. The blue eyed girl crashed down on the floor, a bullet in the head, but Peeta didn't see it. Gale didn't warn anyone when the hovercraft moved up and started shooting all around the Nuts, shutting the entrance forever. They took all their helmets off, and Peeta fell on the floor, Finnick rushing to his side, taking off his helmet.

_" Peeta?! " _Finnick said, turning him so he would lie on his back. _" And you call that being alright?! " _he shouted, noticing Peeta's wound. _" You're not alright! "_

Paylor walked in, kneeling next to Peeta, _" What's wrong? "_

Peeta smiled, _" I tell you, I'm fine. " _

_" We have to take that uniform off. " _Cressida said, looking at Peeta more carefully. _" It's not going to be painless though. "_

The blond winced, and nodded, _" Just do it, please. "_

Paylor rolled her eyes and left, checking the survivors of the attack. Peeta could hear detonations as he tried to keep his eyes open. He guessed that Gale was doing a really good job at ruining the Nuts, and he couldn't help but laugh, making pain rush through his torso. Finnick kept talking to him as he felt hands removing the peacemaker uniform carefully. He moaned as Finnick and Pollux held him up so Cressida could finally take the whole thing off.

_" So, is it bad? " _he asked, whining.

Cressida shook her head, _" I have no idea. "_

_" Okay. Thank you for killing that peacemaker by the way… " _he whispered.

Finnick shook Peeta's left arm, _" Don't close your eyes buddy, stay with us. "_

_" I'm with you… I am. " _the boy answered in a sigh.

The hovercraft was shaking, Gale still bombing the Nuts. Cressida cut Peeta's uniform around the wound. She groaned when she saw all the dripping blood. Peeta's eyelids felt really heavy as he fought against sleepiness, focusing on Finnick's voice, reminding him why he had to stay alive.

_" You'll need to be operated Peeta, " Cressida announced. " All I can do is lessen the blood loss. "_

The blond nodded weakly. _" That's fine by me, "_ he whispered. _" Can I sleep now? "_

_" No, no, no! Peeta, come on! At least wait until we get to 13! " _Finnick said, slapping his face.

Peeta whimpered as Cressida got up and cut a part of her uniform. The blond watched as she got back next to him and pressed the tissue on his wound. He screamed, his back leaving the floor, forcing Finnick and Pollux to push him down. His friend kept apologizing, saying that it was necessary, but Peeta wasn't listening.

_" Bear with it please. " _Cressida said. _" I assure you, I don't like it either. "_

Peeta bit the inside of his cheeks, _" Sure… "_

_" Talk to me Peeta, about anything, " _Finnick begged.

_" I… I want to be alive… When we get the girls back. That's all I want, you know? " _he started, in a weak voice, _" I just want to be here, to see them, " _he continued. _" I can't fail, for that reason. "_

Finnick nodded, tears in his eyes. After a few seconds, he forced him to keep talking. There was no shaking anymore, and no shooting sound either. Peeta smiled as the hovercraft moved away from the Nuts. The mission was a success, and they got to save a dozen of allies.

_" Tell me… How many? " _he asked. _" How many of them are safe now? "_

Cressida looked around her, realizing most of them were injured, _" About fourteen, " she answered, pressing stronger on the wound._

_" That's great… " _Peeta sighed, his eyes closing. _" That's great… "_

A hand slapped his face hard, his eyes opening wide as he tried to localize the source of the hit. Finnick was shaking his face, laughing.

_" I told you. No sleeping until we get to the district Peeta, " _he said. _" Can't let you pass out. "_

Peeta pouted, out of strength, _" I won't pass out… I just want to sleep. "_

_" Close enough, " _Cressida said. _" The answer's no. You should listen to your teammate, soldier Mellark, " she added._

The blond had to fight not to lose himself in a sleep that he thought would be delightful at the moment. His whole body was covered in sweat, his face almost white.

_" He's loosing to much blood, " _Cressida admitted. _" Bring me something else, this is drained in blood, " _she groaned, throwing the tissue away.

Finnick got up and took off his shirt, reaping a part of it and then threw it to Cressida, that pressed it instantly to Peeta's wound, making the boy moan in pain. Finnick kneeled back next to him, and asked him to keep talking.

_" Please Peeta, just do it, " _he said in a calm voice.

_" Fine, fine… Can you please just… Tell the boy with the injured shoulder that I'm sorry? " _he asked. _" Because I truly am. "_

Finnick nodded, _" Sure, I'll do it. Just don't stop talking. "_

_" I killed an innocent today… I'm not worthy or anything, " _Peeta said, his voice weak. _" I don't know why so many people… like me, or just… bear my presence, " _he continued. _" I'm not a good person… Not more than any of you, " _he stated. _" I'm just a boy. "_

Finnick bit his lower lip, shaking his head. Peeta didn't expect him to answer anything or to defend him, he was still sane enough to know he said the truth, once again. And the truth did hurt, but it was better than a beautiful lie. He whimpered as Cressida needed to ask for another piece of clothing to stop the hemorrhage.

_" If I don't make it… Please tell Prim that I am proud of her, " _he sighed. _" And when you'll see Katniss, tell her… tell her I will always love her, and that I'm rooting for her, " _he continued, his voice trembling. _" And that… she has to be happy. That she deserves happiness. " _

Cressida looked up at Peeta's face, and stared at him for a while. Then she blinked repeatedly, and focused on his wound again. Finnick nodded, taking Peeta's hand in his for a second, squeezing it.

_" You're not going to die Peeta, " _he said. _" We haven't seen the last of you, I swear. " _

Peeta smiled, _" I hope you're right about that, " _he answered.

Peeta and Finnick kept talking, and after a long journey back, the hovercraft finally landed in District 13's garage, the numerous ceilings closing above it successively. They decided to put a lot of them to avoid any damage if 13 was to face an attack. Boggs had warned Coin that there were a lot of injured people, so a lot of people from the District's hospital were waiting with wheelchairs and stretchers. Peeta was helped out of the plane, Finnick, Pollux and Cressida holding him as Prim's mom rushed to his side, helping him on a stretcher.

_" What was it? " _she asked Finnick. _" A bullet? " _she asked, checking Peeta's wound.

Finnick nodded, _" It was. Cressida did all she could to stop the blood from spilling too much. " _he explained.

_" Thank you. I'll take care of it from now, " _she said, running and pushing the bed inside the district. _" What is your blood type? " _she asked Peeta.

But he didn't answer, his body finally unable to keep him awake. Prim's mom shouted that they had to find his blood type, that it had to be in his informations as she pushed his bed into an operation room. She was just a nurse, so a doctor came in, his eyes the only thing visible behind his uniform.

Peeta was being operated. Finnick was waiting for any news concerning him, sitting with his head in his hands. One of his legs was shaking constantly, as he feared for his friend's life.

_" Finnick! How is he doing? Is Peeta okay?! " _a girl voice asked. _" Finnick! "_

He looked to his right, facing a breathless Prim, _" Oh Prim! Come and sit next to me. "_ he said, patting a chair next to his.

The girl sat down, her breath still erratic, _" Is he going to be okay? "_

_" I hope so, " _the boy answered. _" He's only been here for half an hour. "_

The girl sighed, _" What happened? "_ she asked.

_" He was helping a boy out. A peacemaker showed up, and shot him. "_

Prim covered her mouth with her hands and started crying. Finnick swallowed and pulled her to his side, patting her head gently, trying to be reassuring. He couldn't blame her for crying, he did it all the time when he was alone.

_" I think he'll be okay, " _he added after a long time. _" He's strong. "_

Prim looked up, eyes full of tears, _" You're right… " _she moaned. _" You have to be right, he'll make it. "_

They waited, side by side for hours, until double doors opened and a doctor walked towards them. Finnick got up instantly, his body all tensed up, hoping for good news.

_" You're here for soldier Mellark I guess? " _he asked, taking his mask off. _" His situation is good. We took the bullet off successfully. But he will need to rest for a day or two. "_

Finnick sighed, relieved, _" Thank you doctor, " _he said, smiling. _" Thank you very much. "_

_" You're welcome. He's a tough boy, he fought for his life even thought he lost so much blood, " _the doctor said. _" He's lucky too. No limb or internal organ was badly touched. That's why he'll be out soon. "_

Prim broke in a laugh, and Finnick joined her. The girl hugged him as the doctor told them they could come visit him later, in the afternoon. The man excused himself and walked away, leaving the two of them enjoying the announcement.

_" Does it mean that the Capitol operation will start later than expected? " _Prim asked.

Finnick knew it wouldn't be good for anyone, but he couldn't imagine going to the Capitol without Peeta.

_" I guess so Prim, " _he answered, smiling. _" Coin promised him he would be part of it. "_

* * *

**NDA: **

**Hi guys, here is the 26th chapter!**

**It was both a hard and exciting one to write, and I hope you enjoyed it.**

**I'm not really good when it comes to describe fight scenes, but I did it, yay!**

**See you in the next chapter,**

**bisous. :)**


	27. Chapter 27 : I won't allow it

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**chapter 27: I won't allow it**

Peeta was still unconscious when Finnick left his room in the beginning of the afternoon. The blond boy sighed, and tried to find the boy with the injured shoulder in the hospital's corridors. After a short time, he found him, sitting on a bench, a bandage covering his shoulder and a part of his right arm. Finnick took a deep breath and sat next to him.

_" Hi. How is your shoulder? " _he asked, trying to look as confident as possible. _" I hope there's no broken bone. "_

The boy looked at him, judgement in his yes, _" Who are you? "_

_" Finnick Odair. Bet you heard about me before, "_ the blond answered, scratching the back of his neck. _" And what is your name? "_

The boy looked down at his feet, _" I'm Brett, " _he answered, less suspicious. _" And you're right, I do know about you. You won the Games once. "_

Finnick smiled, nodding, _" You could say I won it twice… I'm here after all. "_

The boy's eyes widened and he looked down at Finnick's hands, covered with bandages as well. Brett opened his mouth, as if he wanted to say something, but quickly closed it. He seemed nervous. Silence settled for a while, people chatting and walking around the only noise around the boys.

_" Did you get these today? " _the young boy asked in a shaky voice.

Finnick shook his head slightly, _" Oh no, they're old wounds. "_

_" Why are you talking to me right now? " _Brett asked, looking as if he couldn't trust Finnick. _" Are you waiting for someone? "_

Finnick sighed, he was indeed waiting for his friend to wake up. Brett was waiting for an answer while the blond was trying to think of a way to introduce Peeta's apology.

_" Yes. I'm waiting for Peeta Mellark actually, " _he simply said, looking away from the boy.

Brett's eyes lighted up, _" The Peeta Mellark from District 12? He's here? "_

That was the moment when Finnick realized that the boy couldn't know it was that Peeta Mellark that saved him in the morning. All because of those helmets. He sighed, that wasn't going to be easy.

_" Yes. He got shot during today's operation, " _Finnick answered in a calm voice. _" A bullet hit him right in the belly. "_

Brett looked offended, _" Is he… The one that killed my dad? "_

_" I'm not going to lie to you Brett. It was him, " _he answered in a whisper, a hand on his temple. _" It was him that unintentionally killed your father and saved your life. "_

_" Did he send you here? " _Brett asked in a cold voice. _" To make it up to me? "_

Finnick turned towards the boy, _" He did. And he wasn't sure he would make it so… " _he started. _" He just wants to tell you that he's sorry for your loss, and that he'd understand if you can't forgive him. "_

Brett shook his head, his teeth gritted. Tears rolled down his face. Finnick wasn't surprised by that reaction, so he settled a hand on the boy's available shoulder and squeezed it slightly. He knew what it was to have someone you love being killed, he exactly knew what it felt like.

_" I understand what you feel, " _he whispered. _" Every person I loved was taken away from me, out of reach. I know what it feels like Brett. "_

Brett pushed him away, frowning, _" No you don't! How could you still have the strength to fight if you know?! " _he whined. _" You shouldn't be able to stand! "_

_" The fact that they're dead, doesn't mean our lives are over. You have to get up everyday and just do it, living. " _Finnick told him. _" I'm not telling you it will be easy, because it would be a lie, but it's worth it. You'll find other people that will help you to keep going. I know it might not song like a good thing, but if you give up now, what is left? "_

The boy brushed a hand over his face, sobbing quietly. Finnick didn't know if he used the right method, because he ignored everything about that boy. He slid a hand through his curly hair and took a handkerchief out of his pocket, handing it to Brett.

_" They'll keep living as long as you keep them close to you, in your heart. It's okay to be crying over them, it's only natural. But after you've done all your grieving and mourning, you have to get up and find a purpose in life. Peeta and I have lost almost everything, but we're fighting, fighting for justice. Our most precious someones are in the hands of President Snow right now, and we'll do anything to change that. " _Finnick stated, his voice calm and steady. _" I know that you might not have a reason to fight our actual government Brett, but look at all those people in the Districts. Can we just keep doing nothing and watch them starve, being exploited and die because of one man? "_

The blond couldn't stop talking. He was trying to get the boy's mind out of his father's death, out of Peeta's guilt. For sure Peeta did kill a man, a good man, but he was still a good person, willing to save a lot more human beings. He wasn't sure he was still convincing Brett to forgive Peeta, but it was too late to back down.

_" The answer's no, Brett, " _Finnick sighed. _" We have to do something, not for our prides, but for this country. We're not looking for recognition, we're looking for justice. So there is no way we could stop because we lost so many loved ones, it's not an option. It's hard, for sure, but it's all we've got left. "_

Brett sniffed loudly, _" I-I understand… I'm just not as strong as you guys… I'm just a boy who worked in the Nuts after all. "_

_" Peeta was a baker in District 12, and I used to fish in District 4. Look where we are today, you could be better than we are, " _Finnick said, his eyes lost in front of him.

Brett smiled slightly, shaking his head, _" I can't be better. But I will still try, I promise. " _

Finnick's eyes widened and he patted the boy's head gently. He didn't know where all of his own talking came from, but it did work somehow. He was just hoping that Brett could be happy one day, and lead a normal life, in a normal world. The boy was going to have a tough time in 13, without any family or friends, but Finnick and Peeta would help him out for sure.

_" Do you think I'll be allowed to go and see Peeta Mellark too? " _Brett asked, his eyes full of hope.

Finnick laughed, nodding _" If you don't call him Peeta Mellark, you will be! "_

Brett and Finnick waited together for Peeta to wake up. They were joined by Prim, right after her lessons ended for the day. She sat next to Finnick, eyeing the brown-haired boy strangely, not knowing who he was.

_" Prim, this is Brett. Brett, I introduce you to Prim. " _Finnick said, smiling. _" Peeta saved Brett this morning, " _he explained to Prim.

Prim shook the hand Brett was offering her, _" Nice to meet you. "_

_" The pleasure is mine, " _Brett said, bowing his head. _" You're here for Peeta Mellark too? "_

The girl nodded, a little bit startled by Brett's words, _" Yes. "_

They waited, talking tranquilly, for Peeta's nurse to come and tell them when they would be able to finally see him. Almost two hours passed since that time came, and Finnick groaned when he got up, his legs stiff from all the sitting.

_" There you go, " _the nurse said, opening the room's door. _" He's still weak, so please go easy on him, " _she added. _" Also, you shouldn't stay too long, President Coin wants to visit him as soon as possible. "_

Finnick curved an eyebrow at that last information but nodded and stepped towards the bed where a sleepy Peeta was lying, his hands flat on the mattress. Prim rushed to the chair next to the bed and took one of the blond's hand in hers, shaking it slightly. The boy's chest was moving very slowly, and it looked like a painful process for him. Finnick looked down at his bandaged hands, and closed them into fists, willing to be stronger in the future.

_" Are you okay? " _Prim asked, her eyes flying over the wounded's features. _" Does it still hurt? "_

Peeta did the bed smile he could, _" No, it's okay… I'm just really tired, " _he answered. Then, he turned his head slowly, _" You're the boy from earlier, right? " _he asked Brett. _" I'm really sorry for your father. "_

_" You shouldn't worry about that, I forgive you. You were in a rush, a lot of things were happening too, so… " _the boy said, shaking his head. _" I forgive you Peeta Mellark. "_

Peeta let out a shaky laugh, making him cough and whimper, _" You don't have to be so formal with me. "_

Finnick kicked the boy in the shoulder, _" Told you Brett! "_ he laughed.

Peeta felt like a horse had stepped on his belly, and most likely danced on top of him. He had trouble breathing and moving was out of question. Yes, he lied to Prim, but he didn't want her to worry about him when he was sure to get out of the hospital very soon.

_" Excuse me, but I'd like to have a talk with the soldier Mellark, one on one, " _a woman voice said in their backs.

The injured blond recognized immediately Coin's voice, and nodded to her, while Prim tried to hug him in a way that couldn't be dangerous for his wound. Peeta couldn't move his arms, but tried to be as warm as he could to the little girl. Finnick shook his hand slightly, and Brett bowed, then the three of them left, leaving the President with the boy.

Coin cleared her throat, _" I have to admit that I didn't think I'd find you here after this mission, soldier Mellark. "_

_" I'm sorry, I just couldn't leave… this boy behind, " _he sighed, eyeing the door.

Coin rolled her eyes, she looked annoyed, _" I admire your braveness, but don't do something like that again, " _she warned him. _" Not for a random rebel like him, " _she specified. _" You're way more important than that boy. If you ever do something like that again, it might cost you your life. "_

Peeta wanted to start an argument, to discuss these points, but he was too exhausted. He simply nodded, and the president smiled, probably relieved.

_" Will the rescue operation be delayed because of me? Or are you going to send them anyway, and make me catch up later? " _he asked, worried about the answer.

Coin tilted her head to the left, _" I thought about the second option, but I promised you a place in the squad. I know you helped me in the hangar, so I can't take that away from you, " _she said. She sighed, _" As soon as you're better, we'll launch the mission, so hurry up. "_

The blond closed his eyes, solace spreading through his body at that answer, and he swore that he would heal in no time. The president of 13 left him, closing the door of his room behind her, and left the boy alone with his thoughts. He felt like his whole chest was on fire, and had serious trouble breathing, but it didn't really hurt that much. Katniss was probably living things that he couldn't even think about, and he wasn't going to complain about his situation.

He fell asleep during the afternoon, and his nurse had to wake him up to help him eat his dinner; mashed potatoes and fish. Before feeding him anything, she made him swallow down two pills with water. She gave it to him spoon by spoon, his wound not allowing him to move any of his arms. He wasn't hungry, and the nurse didn't get to convince him to finish half of his food. She left him, and said breakfast would be at 9 the next morning. It didn't take him long to fall asleep once again, the pain killers working on his system.

_" Mr Mellark, it's your breakfast, " _a woman voice told him.

He tried to stretch his back, but whimpered in pain as he lifted his arms, so he let them fall back on the mattress. The nurse shook her head and pressed a button to move the bed in a sitting position. Peeta felt like he was being cut in half, and groaned as she put a cup of cocoa to his mouth. He took two sips of it, and coughed, the drink too hot for his tongue. The nurse apologized and gave him one of his buttered toasts, that he chewed on lazily. Once they were done, he thought he could have some alone time again, but a doctor walked in his room, adjusting glasses on his nose.

_" Good morning soldier Mellark, " _he said, stepping closer. _" How are you feeling? "_

Peeta forced his eyes open, _" Terrible… "_

_" Tell me more about it, " _the doctor added, taking some sort of tablet in his hands.

The blond winced, readjusting his position, _" I feel like my brain is too big for my head, and my whole torso feels like it's burning. "_

The doctor nodded, and told him about another pill he had to take before each meal, and right before he went to sleep. Peeta nodded, knowing the nurse would be the one doing that, and thanked the man. He then forced himself to sit up, his back leaving the mattress while two nurses got his bandage off. The doctor frowned when he saw where the bullet had been removed. The skin had darkened, and a blue circle had appeared around the wound. He put white gloves on and applied some sort of cream, reminding Peeta of the one Katniss got for him during their first Games. The nurses rolled him inside brand new bandages and the three of them left Peeta alone for the rest of the morning.

Two days passed before Peeta could stand on his feet and finally take a shower. During his hospitalization, the nurse cleaned him very primarily. So he sighed of relief when he felt the tepid water rolling down his shoulders, down his flat and muscled stomach and back. His body was slimmer than he thought it would be, it was just like when he was still living in 12 with his family.

He got out of the shower, and waited for the doctor to let him leave the hospital for good.

_" I say you can leave, but no exercise before two days, " _he explained, before shaking the blond's hand.

Peeta nodded, smiling, _" Sure, thanks a lot doctor. "_

_" You're welcome. Take care. "_

Peeta walked tranquilly towards the elevator, and got in his room. The dark green on the walls seemed like they were attacking him, and he simply took his schedule before leaving. He looked at his wrist, he had some free time, followed by a reunion at the Commandment Center, obviously about the coming operation. He headed towards the last level, hoping he would find Finnick, so he smiled when he saw the boy sitting on their bench.

_" Peeta?! You're out? " _the boy yelled, getting up and rushing towards him.

The blond's grin widened, _" I am! All good! " _he answered.

_" Is your injury still bad? " _Finnick asked. _" Or is it already okay? "_

Peeta shook his head slightly, _" It's alright. The stitches are still pulling a little bit on the skin, but it doesn't hurt anymore. " _

Finnick hugged him gently, not willing to reopen his friend's wound. They sat on the bench and talked for more than an hour, the older one explaining what happened in the Commandment Center during Peeta's hospital time. Nothing really important, but Coin assured them they would leave in the early morning, no matter which day, probably around 3 or 4 AM, for more discretion.

_" I'm glad the president accepted to leave later than expected, " _Finnick admitted, smiling. _" I would've felt really down if you weren't part of the intervention. "_

_" Thanks buddy, that means a lot, " _Peeta said, patting his shoulder.

Finnick looked up, sighing, _" Well, she doesn't care about us leaving with a delay if you ask me. " _

_" Sure, it's not like she gives a fuck about the girls or anything that isn't herself, " _Peeta added, smiling sadly.

They left for the Commandment Center together, and sat next to each other, in an empty room. Not even Coin was already present, and they had to double-check their schedule to be sure they didn't misread it.

_" Are we that early? " _Finnick asked, looking down at his bracelet. _" It should start in just ten minutes, and the president isn't here. "_

Peeta lifted his shoulders, and Coin came in three minutes later, looking as collected and impassible as always. She settled down the same file he saw weeks, maybe a month, earlier on the table, and waited for the rest of the required people to arrive. The president didn't even think it was necessary to great the boys with a "Good morning", and it made the younger one upset. Plutarch walked in, his hands in his pocket and bowed before sitting down. Haymitch, Beetee, Gale, Cressida and a few other members of the Nuts squad arrived as well, and Coin cleared her throat.

_" As you can all witness, the soldier Mellark is out of hospital, " _she started. _" When will you be able to leave 13? "_

_" In two days, " _Peeta answered.

Haymitch smiled, _" This boy is tough ya know! You shouldn't doubt his abilities. "_

_" I'm sorry, but I strongly disagree, " _Coin admitted. _" He's the weakest point in this unit, because of the Games. "_

Finnick froze at this mention, because he knew he was also considered "broken" because of the Hunger Games he went through. Only, he didn't see the whole thing as a negative thing. Sure, it did change everything in their lives, but they were about to make a change in a lot of people's lives, so it wasn't for nothing. The boy shot a glare at Peeta, and saw that the muscles of his jaw were as contracted as they could be, so he settled a hand on his arm, squeezing it.

_" I do know that the soldier Mellark can't accept killing another human being, unless that individual threatens someone he's strongly attached to, " _Coin continued. _" This is his weakness, and it could cost one of his comrades' life, this is a thing I will not accept. I won't allow it to happen. "_

The president and Peeta were staring at each other, their faces straight and their eyes burning with blame and determination. Peeta knew it was a warning. The woman in front of him could order Boggs, or anybody else to kill him, abandon or tie him so he wouldn't put his teammates in danger. The blond wasn't going to give her this opportunity, he wasn't going to be a coward once they'd get to the Capitol, because he could do anything to get to Katniss.

_" You won't have to sentence me, president, " _Peeta said, never looking away from her. _" I will do everything I can to free Katniss Everdeen. Everything. "_

Coin's face broke into a smirk, and she nodded, apparently satisfied with that answer. Then, she looked at Boggs, and the man got up, turning the projector on. The same map they saw before appeared before their eyes, and Peeta noticed some changes. A lot of green points, representing their allies, had disappeared, and some of them lost some people. It made the two boys bite the inside of their cheeks, Finnick taking his cord out of his pants' pocket and starting to tie knots again. Peeta wanted to get it out of his hands and his reach, but he couldn't refuse him that little thing, so he tried not to look at his friend's hands.

_" I know. We lost many people in the last 72 hours. The Capitol sent brigades in District 2 and 3, obviously to seek out rebels, " _Coin explained. _" Which means you'll have to be even more careful, and that a lot of you won't make it to where the tributes are imprisoned. "_

Gale tightened up on his chair, _" And where is that exactly? "_

_" The last tributes' quarters, " _Coin answered.

* * *

**NDA : Here's the 27th chapter.**

**I'm really sorry about the delay, I can't be forgiven.**

**But I had a lot of things to do regarding my school.**

**Hope you enjoyed it,**

**bisous.**


	28. Chapter 28 : We have to get you out

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**chapter 28: We have to get you out of here**

Peeta's eyes widened at the mention of the training headquarters. He never thought that he'd get back there, and even less to save the girls. The boy was lost in his thoughts when Beetee rolled forward in his wheelchair, stopping in front of the president.

_" During the last two days, I was with my team trying to find a way to get the Capitol's flight security off, " _he started. _" Seems like it worked just fine, so if no new system protection comes up before you go, you should be able to fly there, and not take the train as it was basically planed, " _he announced, smiling. _" Which means that you have an advantage on Snow. Be sure to make good use of it, " _he continued. _" We also achieved a very important task, taking the power off the place, which will make everything easier. "_

The president nodded, and Beetee exited the Commandment Center, probably to go back to his office and keep inventing new things for the revolution's sake.

_" With that said, we'll be leaving in two days, at 3 AM exactly. We will meet in the garage, and the rescuing mission will be launched, " _Coin stated. _" Thanks to what Mr Latier has done, there will be no need for you to cross the Districts by foot. "  
_Plutarch Heavensbee got up, _" But you will still need distractions, in order to get all the peacekeepers away from the Tributes' center, " _he said, walking towards the president. _" So hopefully, you'll have less people in the Capitol to shoot you. "  
__" Soldier Hawthorne, if you could please enlighten us on the project you share with Mr Latier. " _Coin said.

That was right, he did spend a lot of time in the man's office, preparing special weapons, deadly bombs and other things Peeta didn't know anything about. The blond was glad to see that Finnick stopped tying knots and waited for Katniss' best friend to talk, just like him.

Gale stood next to the president, _" Mr Latier and I have been working on smoke and gas bombs, in order to blind and immobilize enemies. It's simple enough, " _he started. _" You just push the button on top of it, then launch it. Also, It will be better if you're not in the room when the gas is released. "_

Peeta had to admit it was a really helpful weapon. That way, if there were any peacekeeper guarding the girl's cells, they'd be out, and they wouldn't have to worry about getting shot in the back.

_" The mission is average, but risky, " _Coin said, thanking Gale with a nod. _" You'll get inside and Boggs will supervise everything. We don't know where the prisoners are exactly, so you'll have to be as quick as possible, " _she continued, walking in front of them. _" There is no way for us to know if they have an alarm system. Time will be your worst enemy over there, just be sure to act and think fast, " _the woman added. _" Once you have the girls, you'll retreat to the hovercraft, that will be on the roof. I know it sounds simple like that, but it sure won't be. "_

The meeting ended half an hour later, the President explaining everything with precision. Peeta suggested that they got in the peacemakers' suits again, and everyone agreed to that. The blond left the Commandment Center with Finnick, both looking forward to the expedition. The smaller boy felt bad that they had to delay it because of his wound, but he couldn't help that fact, what happened did happen.

_" Finally, we're getting them here, "_ Finnick said in a sigh. _" I know we'll make it back, all of us, plus the girls. "  
_Peeta nodded, to convince himself, _" We will, I'm sure. "_

The day of the mission came fast, Peeta and Finnick deciding to spend the day before that on their bench, Gale choosing the training center instead. They did talk about a lot of things, from the Capitol to districts 4 and 12.  
The night before the operation, Peeta was in his bed, trying to catch some sleep, but was enable to get any, too worried and impatient about the rescue. He thought about the moment he would finally be able to see Katniss again, to take her in his arms again.

He shook his head, rolling on his side, _" No… She doesn't trust me, " _he mumbled to himself.

He couldn't even care about that aspect, all he wanted was to get her out of Snow's reach, back to her loved ones' sides. His own desires meant nothing, it wasn't important, all he had to do was to get Katniss, period. No matter if she hated him, if she wished he was dead or anything. All of these things didn't mean a thing to him, he just wanted her to be safe. Weeks had gone by since she was last seen on television, and Peeta was worried about her. He couldn't understand why Snow wouldn't constantly show the rebels that he got the mockingjay wrapped around his finger. It made him scared of which Katniss they'd find in the tributes' center, the tortured, broken one or the real one, wounded but still fighting. He was afraid to acknowledge that, but it didn't change how bad he wanted to save her, because she was the most precious thing he ever had and would ever have in his life.  
His alarm clock went off at 2:15 and he jumped out of his bed, already awake. He took his uniform and left his room without taking a schedule, which was a good change. He enjoyed a short shower and got in his clean clothes, throwing his pajamas in the dirty laundry basket. He made his way to the canteen, steps fast and short, blood pumping at his temples. Their breakfast had exceptionally been made the previous day, so he sat at the table with his tray. Gale joined him, Finnick quickly followed, the president allowing everyone to eat where they wanted for one meal. They ate yogurts and buttered toasts, along with a glass of orange juice, trying to stay calm before their mission.

_" We should go, " _Finnick said, peeking at his bracelet. _" We leave in ten. "_

So they walked out of the cafeteria, heading towards the garage, in a tensed up silence. None of them wanted to break it, afraid some stupid scared words could leave their mouths. When they arrived, Cressida, Boggs, Pollux and Paylor were already there, getting in peacemakers' suits. They saluted them and put on the uniforms too. Silence broke only for the sound of boots hitting the floor repeatedly, or electronic beeps coming from the inside of the hovercraft.

_" You better be ready soldiers, " _Coin stated, walking towards them. _" Soldier Hawthorne, get on board, you're piloting again. "_

Katniss' best friend nodded, bowed and entered the plane. Peeta and Finnick waited outside for the rest of the squad to arrive. They greeted each of them, Jackson, Leeg 1 and Leeg 2, Castor, along with a few volunteers.

Five minutes later, everyone was sitting in the hovercraft, on the tributes' seats, making Peeta wish that no other kid would have to do it ever again. The blond hoped that all they were doing with District 13 and Coin made sense, and would make a change in Panem. Gale shouted to announce the departure of the plane, and the journey to the Capitol began. The first hour had been filled with a silence full of tension, every soldier trying to collect their minds and plan their arrival at the tributes' center.

_" I just can't stand this silence anymore, " _Finnick sighed. _" We have a long flight ahead. "  
_Peeta just nodded, _" Yeah… You're right, " _he answered. _" I just don't know what to say. "  
__" Anything is fine by me, I'm so anxious right now and the non-talking thing isn't helping at all, " _Finnick growled. _" So… Did you have any paintings in 12? I mean, things you did that were not comestible, " _he rapidly asked.  
Peeta laughed, _" Yeah, I did, a lot actually. When we got back from our Games, I had to express my feelings in some way you know? " _he started. _" And that was how I did it, by painting. I still think it's my greatest skill. Well, I saw what was left of my home, and I can assure you that they're all gone. "  
__" Don't underestimate yourself there buddy, you're quite good when it comes to talking too, " _Finnick said, shaking his head slightly. _" Anyway, I would have loved to see those pieces of art of yours. Prim showed me the drawings you did for her, it was amazing, and I'm sure you're just as skilled with paint and brushes. "_

Peeta had no idea how to handle this sudden praise from his friend, but he put it on fear. Fear of not coming back from this mission that seemed totally insane and somehow impossible. He could easily imagine how scared Finnick was, because he was just as impressed as the older man, just as terrified. They didn't have a choice, they had to succeed and free the girls, no other option was acceptable.

_" I'll make new ones, and you'll see them, I promise, " _Peeta said, smiling to the other blond. _" I'll do my best. "_  
_" See, you're really good with words, I told you, " _Finnick laughed.

The two boys kept talking, the rest of their squad still extremely quiet. They didn't seem bothered by their conversation, so they didn't even think about stopping. After a long time, the hovercraft finally slowed down, and Peeta straightened up on his seat, his whole body tensing up. Stress was building inside of him, and he knew he hadn't been scared that much since the Quarter Quell.

_" Okay, we're approaching the Capitol, " _Gale said, headphones on his ears. _" Is it clear? "_

Katniss' best friend was nodding, pushing buttons and pulling on levers, making the rest of the squad stare at his back, sitting in his pilot chair. The plane changed to a stationary position, meaning the news weren't exactly great.

_" We'll just need an opening, once we get in, they won't detect us, they will think we're a regular unit, " _Gale said, speaking louder. _" Just tell me when we can move forward. "_

Minutes passed and Gale didn't say another word, Finnick bitting his lower lip while Peeta stared at his feet, worried. Cressida wore a pout on her face, which seemed eerie in that situation, and Boggs just looked impatient. Gale's foot was tapping the floor repeatedly, as he stared in front of him, at the Capitol's border.

_" Yes, it's Gale, " _he suddenly shouted, jolting in his seat. _" Sure, thanks! "_

Without any warning, the hovercraft urged forward, soldiers whining at the move. Peeta couldn't help but break in a terrible laughter as the scenery of the great Capitol flashed in front of his eyes.

_" What are you laughing about Peeta? " _Finnick asked, quite shocked.  
Peeta gave a slight shake of head, _" We're getting in, we're going to get them, " _he simply replied. _" I'm just happy we got this far. "  
__" You sure are an optimistic guy, " _Finnick said, curving an eyebrow at his friend. _" Always seeing the bright side even in the worst situations. "  
__" Or maybe I'm just crazy, " _Peeta blurted out. _" I don't even know. "_

Finnick didn't feel the need to answer that particular sentence, and Peeta kept laughing, completely terrified. Silence settled slowly in the plane again, the blond's giggle calmly disappearing, as the flying device got closer to the roof of the tributes' center. Both Finnick's and Peeta's eyes widened when they recognized the slim and tall silhouette of the building.

_" Oh my god Peeta, here we are… " _Finnick whispered.  
Boggs undid his seatbelt, _" And that's exactly when things get serious, " _he stated, getting up. _" Last minute briefing. We get out of the hovercraft, we split in two groups, the place is huge. Soldier Hawthorne will lead the first one, I'll take care of the second. " _he explained.

The blond already knew that, he was in group one, with Gale and Finnick. They were supposed to start at the bottom and meet the other half at the middle of the building if they couldn't find anything. But if a group did find something, the 'leader' of it would inform the other by radio, and gather all soldiers to 'extract' the girls. Peeta froze while getting up at the term Boggs used, but didn't say a word about it. All of them put an helmet on, then took some gas and smoke bombs. They didn't speak and followed Coin's secondhand's orders, leaving the hovercraft that just landed.

_" Soldier Hawthorne, let's keep in touch, " _Boggs said as he leaded his group towards the entrance of the roof.

Gale nodded and headed towards another stairway, that fell down the side of the building from the outside, Peeta last in the formation. Clapping boots against the metal of the stairs made the blond's ears whistle in an uncomfortable way, but he kept descending, focused on their goal.

_" Once we get down there, we'll split in two groups, " _Gale huffed, his index strong over the trigger of his gun. _" Finnick, I'll let you supervise the other group. We'll meet at the foot of the stairs five minutes later, " _he continued, his voice firm beside his erratic breathing.  
_" Sure, I will, " _Finnick answered, giving a slight nod that only Peeta could see.

The staircase looked infinite and the ground didn't seem to get any closer as the soldiers kept rushing down them. The wind was howling around them, making the metallic feature tremble, along with their own weights. Gale finally slowed down, and gave a shake of head. They split in two equal teams, Peeta following Finnick with Jackson and Cressida.

_" Here's the elevator, out of service obviously, " _Peeta stated, _" I think we'd better get out our lamps, it's black out there. "_

His fellow squad members obeyed to that, and walked in a close formation towards the first entrance of the building they saw. Finnick motioned to the others to get their bombs ready and opened the door, Cressida pointing a gun at the new opening. Not a single noise, not a single source of light was noticeable, so the blond-haired soldier entered. She lightened the huge room with her torch, and she stopped.

_" What is it? Found anything? " _Jackson asked, coming next to her. _" Well, " _she breathed out. _" I wasn't expecting these kinds of things in a tributes' center. "  
_Peeta frowned and took a few steps forward, _" It wasn't like this last year, they changed everything. "_

The four of them got further inside the room, the door close behind them. Peeta didn't recognize the place, it was filled with weird machines, tubes, syringes and other medical stuffs. The smell of disinfectant was burning his nostrils even with the helmet on, and it menaced to dry out his blue eyes. His teammates and himself kept progressing inside the darkened hall, steps careful but fast, the clock still running.

_" Stop, stop, " _he said, his voice higher than he wanted it to be. _" This wasn't here before, " _he explained, pointing to a huge metallic double-paneled door.  
Finnick nodded vividly, _" He's right, that's new, " _he confirmed as they walked towards it.

Arms and hands trembling, Peeta walked towards it, noticing how solid it was with every new step. The group kept moving towards it, Jackson watching their back, then the blond stopped. He looked on his left, at the monitor next to the new door, and groaned when he saw they needed a passcode to unlock it. He turned on his heels and shook his head, angry.

_" We can't go inside, they settled up a security code, " _he sighed. _" And I don't think bombs can open those massive things. "  
_Finnick dropped his hands, his shoulders falling, _" There must be a way, let's meet the others, then we'll see. "  
_Cressida nodded, _" It has to be an important place if they thought of securing it, " _she stated. _" We have to tell the others. "_

They moved back to the exit, their movements faster and less hesitant. Once out, they ran towards the staircase, and saw that the other half of the group was already there, Gale standing on the stairs, his head turned towards the sky.

_" Found anything? " _he asked, getting down.  
Finnick nodded, _" We did. You? "  
__" Nothing much, just empty corridors with no source of life, " _Gale answered. _" Let's see what you got, " _he added, heading in the direction the four came from.

They got back into the hall, and stood in front of the closed doors, Gale eyeing the passcode monitor. He contacted Boggs to tell them about their discovery, and stopped the conversation there. Jackson stepped closer to the monitor, and sighed.

_" Where is Beetee when you need him? " _she said more than asked.  
Gale smiled behind his helmet, _" Don't worry, he gave me some electronic toys yesterday night, I think one could be useful. "_

He reached out for a pocket in the peacekeeper's uniform and got three little screwdriver-looking things. Reading the name on the side of each, he jolted while squeezing the bronze one in his right hand, then nodded.

_" This should do the trick, " _he mumbled, turning it on.

A blue light appeared at the head of the tool, and he directed it towards the digit security device. A low buzzing sound came out of the electronic feature, and before Peeta's amazed eyes, letters and numbers appeared out of nowhere. Holograms, that slowly switched place, creating a combination.

_" This is unbelievable, " _Finnick breathed out. _" I have never seen anything like that in my entire life, and I've seen a lot of things. "_

The group was gathered around Gale, waiting for the process to end, Leeg 2 and Cressida watching their backs, and in a 'beep', the tool finally gave out the passcode. Twenty five letters, eleven numbers were flashing in front of the squad members' eyes. Katniss' best friend laughed silently and started typing the combination on the device, taking his time, not willing to alert the Capitol about their presence in the tributes' center.

_" And… done, " _he announced, the monitor's keys turning green. _" Let's go inside, calmly, " _he ordered, his thumb on the unlocking button.

They got in formation, guns pointing straight for half of them, bombs in hands for the others. Gale finally pushed the button, and the doors made a huge screeching sound, opening slowly. Peeta's blood was pumping endlessly at his temple as a huge corridor appeared in front of them, lightbulbs twinkling along the way. Finnick went first, leading his group, and Gale informed Boggs about the situation, requiring them to join. Large windows were on each side of the corridors, and Peeta saw white beds, white floor, white walls and cupboards. He had no idea what that was doing here.

_" Who do you think used to be in those rooms? " _he asked, his voice unsure. _" It looks like an hospital. "_

Nobody replied to that question, because they all felt that the answer was terrifying. Another set of doors was at the end of the corridors, and when Finnick pushed the handle, it wasn't locked. Gale stopped the team on their way, explaining that Boggs and the other half of the squad was almost there. Peeta knew that Finnick just wanted to keep going as the building seemed mostly empty, but they obeyed the order. Soon, Boggs and the rest of the group appeared in the corridor, running, the double doors closing behind them.

_" We didn't find anything up there, it seemed abandoned, covered in dirt, " _Coin's secondhand said, making his way to the front. _" It's almost sure they're in here. "_

He opened the door and pointed his gun towards him, realizing they walked into what looked like a waiting room. It was all white, chairs and couches on the sides, with two doors. The black man said they needed to part again, and gave a rendezvous in that place five minutes later. Gale nodded and pushed the right door, to find another corridor, with no rooms on the sides this time. He walked slowly, his group following his steps carefully.

_" Look, there's another corridor at the end. Two directions, " _Finnick said.  
Gale growled, _" This is a maze! Finnick, we'll meet here in two minutes, " _he stated, heading to the left.

Peeta, Finnick, Cressida and Jackson rushed to the left, and after a hundred meters was a single door, with a tiny window. The blond girl got on her tiptoes to peek through it, gasping at whatever she saw.

_" K-Katniss is in here, Katniss is in here! " _she squealed. _" We have to open that door! " _she said, turning the handle without any result.  
Peeta was frozen, his arms falling at his sides, _" We'll probably need one of Gale's tools, " _he added in a low voice.

Finnick didn't say a word before running towards the other side of the corridor. Peeta dared taking a few steps forward and looked through the window. Grey eyes stared back at him, and he jumped back, yelling. He thought she knew it was him for a moment, but with the helmet, she couldn't.

Jackson put a hand on his shoulder, _" Are you okay? " _she asked, concern in her voice.

Peeta nodded vividly, and they waited for Finnick to come back with the rest of his group. Cressida kept trying to open the door, kicking it with her feet, with her shoulders, but nothing happened, the door not even budging. Katniss stood straight and calm behind it, her eyes and nose the only thing that appeared in the tiny window. The blond turned on his heels, staring at the corridor, hoping to see Finnick coming back.  
Footsteps noises grew louder as the rest of their group joined them in front of the door. Peeta couldn't see Finnick and started to panic, pushing his teammates on his way.

_" Where's Finnick?! " _he asked Gale. _" Is he okay?! "  
_Gale settled a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it gently, _" He's okay, we got Annie out. Boggs found Johanna, they're guiding them outside. "  
__" K-Katniss is in that room, " _Peeta explained, pointing at the door. _" I think I'd better stay back. "_

Gale didn't object the blond's offer and rushed towards the door, his eyes meeting Katniss'. Peeta took a few steps away from the door, and stood back to the wall, exhaling loudly. Gale laughed, probably ecstatic, and pulled out a silver tool, using it on the lock. He cut through around the handle with the ray and motioned to the girl to step back. She curved an eyebrow at that, but did it anyway. Gale kicked the door, and it fell, Katniss standing in a white hospital blouse, the inside of her right elbow connected to an IV.

_" Katniss, it's Gale, we're getting you out of here! " _he screamed, walking carefully towards her.

He took the needle out of her arm and pulled her out of the room. She was trembling from head to toes, looking all around her as her best friend wrapped an arm around her waist, helping her walking. Peeta's eyes followed her as she walked past him and the whole group made its way back. When they were about to reach the huge metallic doors, a clattering noise revolved in the hall, making the whole team freeze. Without a word, Peeta put a hand on the closing button and took a gas bomb with his other hand. He clicked both buttons and launched the bomb. They waited two minutes, the required time for the gas to disappear, and Peeta clicked to open the doors again. Two peacekeepers were lying down, unconscious.

_" We have to get out of here, " _he said.

Jackson shot a bullet in the guys' heads and they ran outside the building and towards the staircase, Gale holding Katniss in his arms. Peeta was last, watching behind them. A peacekeeper appeared, and the boy didn't hesitate a second before pulling the trigger, finding aim in the man's chest. The dead body fell on the ground and the blond started walking up the stairs. Halfway to the roof, the rhythm slowed down, some soldiers completely out of breath.

_" We can't stop now, let's go! " _Jackson yelled.  
Peeta looked down, realizing a bunch of peacekeepers were following, _" No time to take a break, they're right behind us! " _he shouted.

The formation remained going up, and Peeta shot blindly below him, trying to slow down their opponents. His fake leg wasn't helping him, and when he looked down again, he saw the peacekeepers got closer. He bit the inside of his cheeks and stopped, waiting for them to get closer. He shot two, one falling off the staircase and taking the other one in his way. The blond started running up the stairs again, trying to catch up with the rest of the group. He knew they'd leave without him if they needed to, so he rushed.  
Finally, he stepped on the roof, running as Cressida, standing in front of the hovercraft, tried to shoot the peacekeepers behind him. His throat was hurting, his lungs aching desperately for air as he ran for his life. He jumped inside as the door closed, his gun sliding on the floor as the plane left the tributes' center's roof.

_" Are you okay? " _Cressida asked, taking off her helmet.  
Peeta nodded, doing the same, _" Yeah, I'm fine, " _he answered, out of breath.

He looked up, and saw Finnick and Annie hugging. A smile formed on his mouth. Johanna was unrecognizable, completely bald, but she seemed okay. Gale was crouching in front of Katniss, her hands in his as she looked at him nodding. His smile got bigger, they made it.

**NDA : Oh god, this was a challenging one.**

**I don't like the end, but the rest is okay I guess.**

**Sorry for always being late, but inspiration is a bitch that's not mine.**

**Hope you enjoyed it,**

**bisous.**


	29. Chapter 29 : But you're always here

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 29: But you're always here**

Peeta tried to wrap his mind around what happened, how they all got back from the tributes' center, and how the three girls were with them, in the hovercraft, heading towards District 13. He slid a hand through his sweaty blond hair and his gaze focused on Katniss, Gale still talking to her. She was seating, and Cressida was applying a bandage on her elbow, where her IV used to be. The boy wondered what they gave her, what kind of medicine, or drugs.

Grey eyes met blue ones, and the two of them stared at each other for a while. Peeta felt this rush of relief run through his veins as his face broke into a smile, he didn't fail her this time, she was finally going to reunite with her family. Katniss suddenly got up, pushing Gale away, and walked towards the blond, her hands turning into fists.

_" How dare you being there?! " _she yelled, getting closer to Peeta. _" Do you even care about any of these people?! " _

The blond froze, still on the floor, as he looked at Katniss in disbelief. He knew she didn't trust him, but hearing these words coming directly from her mouth was worse than he ever expected it to be. A pain expanded through his chest as the girl kept walking in his direction, Gale coming after her and setting a hand on her shoulder.

_" What are you even doing here?! " _she groaned, throwing her best friend's hand away. _" Please don't tell me you came to save me, you've never been able to do so! "_

Gale caught Katniss in his arms, _" Calm down Catnip, it's okay, " _he told her in a calm voice. _" It's okay. "_

Finnick let go of Annie and kneeled in front of Peeta, waving a hand in front of the blond's eyes. No reaction came, as tears gathered then slid on his cheeks. Johanna laughed in the back, and Finnick shot her a death glare, to which she just rolled her eyes. Peeta sniffed, his stare dropping to the floor. The older boy shook his forearm gently, and put a hand under his chin, forcing his friend to look up. Behind Finnick's shoulder, Peeta saw Gale hugging Katniss, that apparently started crying too, which sent a pain spreading through his whole being.

_" Hey, Peeta, look at me, " _Finnick begged, his voice trembling. _" Peeta, please. "_

The blond gave a weak nod, _" I'm sorry, it's fine, " _he stated, weeping tears away from his face. _" Everything's fine, we got them. "_

His friend closed his eyes, biting his lower lip, frowning, and Peeta didn't remember seeing the boy wearing that sort of expression before. He managed a smile, and settled a hand on Finnick's shoulder, making him open his eyes again.

_" Don't worry about me, " _Peeta whispered. _" Go find Annie, and please enjoy every single moment you spend with her. "_

Finnick nodded vividly, _" I will Peeta, I will. "_

The blond left and Peeta stayed on the floor, staring blankly in front of him as he heard Katniss and Gale talk. He tried not to listen to their conversation, but his ears caught every single word they were exchanging.

_" You shouldn't blame Peeta, he did a lot for the revolution, " _Gale told Katniss, sliding his fingers through her black hair. _" He's on our side. "_

Katniss snorted, _" I don't know how you can believe in a guy like him Gale, he's no good, " _she answered, her voice full of anger. _" You shouldn't trust him, and I tell you that because I know him. "_

Gale sighed, _" Catnip, come on, at least try not to be rude to him, " _he said. _" Just let the boy live. "_

_" Why should I be the one that has to be nice to him? He doesn't deserve that! " _she growled back, shaking her head. _" I just don't want to see him ever again. "_

Peeta got up, his real leg shaking under him, and walked towards the piloting boot, then sat on the available seat, where Gale should be seconding. Boggs looked at him, and curved an eyebrow, wondering what the blond was doing there.

_" You shouldn't be here, " _he stated, his gaze focusing on the sky again.

Peeta rolled his eyes, _" I know, I shouldn't be anywhere actually. But I can't listen to her any longer, " _he said.

_" You're talking about Katniss. " _Coin's secondhand sighed. _" She might be shocked. Don't worry, our doctors will check her as soon as we arrive in 13. We'll find out what they did to her. "_

Peeta smiled sadly, _" I don't think it will change anything, " _he breathed out. _" She will still look at me that way, and there's nothing medicine could change about that. "_

Boggs didn't reply anything, and Peeta was allowed to stay next to him for the rest of the flight.

The hovercraft got down the garage, and everyone exited it. The blond waited until there was nobody left, not willing to see Katniss again. His eyes opened wide when he realized they'd have to see each other at each meal, since they shared the same table, and sighed in desperation. He finally got up, put his hands in his pockets and left the plane. Every squad member was still there, Coin standing in front of them with a slight smile at the corner of her mouth.

_" There he is, " _she sighed when she saw Peeta. _" I wanted to congratulate you soldiers. This mission is a full success, and we're taking care of the girls in that moment, " _she announced. _" The next mission will be the most dangerous and important one, but we'll talk about it tomorrow. "_

Boggs cleared his throat, _" You're now free for the day, please enjoy it, " _he said, smiling.

Peeta moved out of the garage, headed towards an elevator and tapped on the last level's button. He walked until he reached the bench, and sat on it. Katniss was in the hospital, doctors looking for any kind of medicine in her system, searching for any trace of torture or hijacking, but the blond knew they would find almost nothing. Maybe some bruises, but nothing internal. Prim came to his mind, and he smiled, at least the little girl would finally be happy, having her sister back to her side. The only one that wasn't feeling good, was him only, and he didn't want to focus on that, he wanted to see all the great aspects of the girls' come back.

He stayed on the bench for minutes, trying to collect himself before deciding to try to see Prim, and borrow her notebook again to fill it with drawings. This way, he could think about something else than Katniss' attitude towards him. Peeta couldn't even blame her for that, it wasn't her fault, it was Snow's fault, but still, it made him upset. As he reached the level where the Everdeen's room was located, he saw Haymitch, sitting in front of their door.

_" Oh, Peeta! I was waiting for you, " _he said, getting up with trouble.

Peeta curved an eyebrow at him, _" How did you know I'd come here? "_

_" Primrose wanted me to give you this, " _he said, handing the heavy book to the blond. _" She said that you would need it, " _he added, scratching his neck awkwardly. _" What did she mean by that anyway? "_

_" You haven't seen Katniss, have you? " _Peeta asked, in a low voice.

Haymitch smiled, shaking his head, _" No I didn't, why? "_

_" You'll find out soon enough. Thanks for the book, " _Peeta answered, walking back to the elevator.

He finally got into his room, and locked the door behind him. Getting his pens and erasers out, he started drawing things that matched Prim's notes. Reading them helped him a lot, and he had to pause when a sentence caught his eyes.

" Peeta Mellark just lied for Katniss, I'm sure he does it for her sake, I believe in him. "

The blond never expected Primrose to trust him so soon in the Hunger Games, to understand that all he did was just trying to keep Katniss alive. He rubbed the handwriting with his fingertips and sighed before getting back to his drawings. Hours passed, and his hand refused to stop moving on the smooth material of Prim's notebook, and he kept flipping pages, skipping those that weren't marked. His stomach growled, and he looked down at his bracelet, it was already lunchtime, and he spent more than four hours in his room, drawing. Closing the book, he left and headed towards the cafeteria, not really willing to go there.

He took his tray and looked over his table, Katniss was here, apparently out of hospital, eating her rice, one of Gale's arms around her neck. Nausea built up inside of his belly, but he made his way, seating next to Prim.

_" Oh Peeta! " _the girl screamed, pulling him in a tight hug. _" I'm so glad you're back! "_

Katniss looked at them, _" Prim, " _she warned her sister, her tone menacing and low. _" Keep on eating. "_

Prim's hold around Peeta lightened, _" I'm sorry… " _she whispered, returning to her plate.

Tension was palpable, and Peeta felt unwanted as Katniss' mother tried to catch his gaze. He looked at her, curving an eyebrow and she mouthed a "thank you" before leaving the table with her tray. The blond bowed his head lightly and started cutting his soya, his stare focused on his plate. He didn't want to look at Katniss, even thought he really wanted to. It was so difficult, so different from what he had imagined.

_" Did Haymitch give you my notebook? " _Prim whispered, not looking at Peeta.

He gave a slight nod, _" Yes, and I started filling it already, " _he answered.

_" Good, " _the girl sighed, chewing on some rice. _" I'll show it to Katniss once you're done. "_

The blond froze, _" Thank you, " _he breathed out. _" A lot. "_

Under the table, sure that Katniss couldn't see a thing, Primrose squeezed Peeta's thigh, making the boy smile. He was more than happy to have her by his side, always cheering him up, no matter what. Pulling his glass of water to his mouth, Peeta's eyes met Katniss' grey ones, judgmental and burning with something the boy didn't want to know a thing about. He shook his head, putting down his glass. All he wanted was to see Katniss happy, no matter if it was with someone else, or far away from him. He tried to hold onto this thought, and kept eating silently.

_" Gale, I missed you so much… " _Katniss sighed, her head falling in the crook of the boy's neck. _" I thought about you everyday when I was in the Capitol. "_

Her best friend smiled, _" I did just the same Catnip, just the same, " _he said, caressing her cheek with his fingers.

_" We have to catch up on all these months we've been apart, " _the girl stated, taking some soya in her mouth. _" There's a lot of things I want to do, " _she continued. _" Especially with you. "_

Peeta choke on his rice, and did his best not to spit it all out. Closing his eyes, he settled down his fork and knife. He eyed his plate then looked at the ceiling for a while. Prim looked at the boy, biting her lower lip, wanting to do something for him. She brushed his forearm with her hand and offered him a comforting smile. He gave a weak nod, and took a sip of water, trying to calm down. This wasn't Katniss' fault, he kept reminding himself, this wasn't her fault.

_" Do you think I can come in your room? " _she asked Gale, nudging the side of his neck.

Gale giggled, stopping eating, _" I don't think they'll check anyway, " _he answered.

Katniss looked at her sister, _" Don't touch him! " _she groaned. _" We already talked about that, " _she added.

_" Excuse me, " _Prim said, sliding her chair further from the blond.

This was more than Peeta could take, so he excused himself and left the table. He threw his tray away and ran towards the elevator, pushing the button of the last level repeatedly, willing for the machine to move already. The doors closed, but an arm stopped them, and the boy rolled his eyes, growling.

_" Peeta, where are you going? " _Finnick asked, sliding in the elevator. _" You left so fast! "_

The blond sighed, _" I'm heading to our bench, I need to stay away from them. "_

_" Did Katniss say something again? " _his friend asked, frowning. _" Even Gale told her she was too rough with you. "_

Peeta shook his head slightly, _" Not to me directly, " _he replied. _" But it still hurts. "_

Finnick didn't say anything more as the elevator moved up, stopping at the highest level, where both of them sat on the bench. Peeta wanted to disappear, he did what he wanted to do, save Katniss, and the future was all blurry now that it was done.

_" I'm really sorry for what's happening, " _Finnick said, patting the shorter boy's back. _" I just wish I could do something for you. "_

Peeta looked up at his friend, _" There is nothing we can do, unfortunately, " _he sighed. _" I'll just let her go, she'll be happy with Gale and her family, it's more than enough. "_

Finnick bit the inside of his cheeks and pushed Peeta, _" Come on man! Be selfish for once! " _he groaned.

Peeta's eyes widened, _" I have been selfish Finnick, but from now on, it's different! "_, he shouted.

_" Yeah, because you saved her! " _Finnick yelled back. _" Are you just going to give up?! "_

Peeta laughed sadly, _" What else can I do? If I try to talk to her, it'll make her hate me even more. It's time for me to let go Finnick, " _he replied. _" It will be better for the both of us. "_

Finnick got up the bench, his friend following him with his eyes. Suddenly, he hit the wall once, twice and again, and again, Peeta screamed, telling him to stop. He got up and held the older boy by his waist. He pulled him back, Finnick kicking in the air, and forced him to sit down once he calmed down.

_" Why are you doing this?! " _Peeta asked, worried, a hand rubbing his friend's back.

Finnick was crying, _" Because this isn't fair! " _he whined, hiding his face in his hands. _" What did Snow do to her?! I swear I'll kill him with my own hands Peeta! " _he shouted, his voice revolving in the hallway. _" I swear I will! "_

Peeta stared at his friend, eyes wide open, breath erratic. He knew how much Finnick cared about him, and was thankful for that affection. But still, he couldn't accept that much concern, the man finally found the love of his life again, but was crying because of someone else's misery.

_" You! You deserve to be happy Peeta! " _he moaned, his shoulders shaking. _" After all you did, after all you've been through, this shouldn't be happening! You should have your part of happiness too! "_

Peeta smiled and forced the man to look up at him, _" Finnick, it's okay. I know what I have to do now, " _he whispered. _" We'll go to the Capitol and execute President Snow, then we'll all lead our lives, " _he stated.

_" Don't lie to me Peeta! I know you're not okay with the situation. So stop putting these walls between you and the rest of the world, it's no use! " _Finnick groaned, weeping tears away from his face. _" I can see you Peeta, and I know how you feel, it's too late. "_

The younger boy's hand fell flat on the bench between their legs, his mouth falling open with words he couldn't form conveniently. He didn't have a choice, he had to be strong, the fight was not over, the war hadn't been won yet. A lot of bad things happened for sure, but it still wasn't a reason to give up, not because of Katniss' behavior. They had her in 13, safe and miles away from Snow, but the man was still breathing. And Peeta was willing to change that.

_" I can't be selfish, not when he's still alive, " _Peeta stated, his voice firm. _" I'm not telling you I'll be fine, not when Katniss is like that, but I am still standing. " _

Finnick groaned, looking at his bloody fingers, _" You don't have to be strong for us Peeta, " _he sighed. _" It's okay if you cry, and if you're sad too. "_

_" Thank you Finnick, I'll go back to my drawings, " _Peeta said, patting the man's shoulder. _" You should find Prim for your wounds. "_

He got up and entered the elevator, the doors closing silently. Just like he told his friend, he drowned completely into filling Prim's notebook, his pen moving angrily over the pages. After finishing about ten sketches, his fist bumped into his desk, and he started crying, which made him even more upset about himself. Closing the book to keep it dry and clean, he laid his forehead on it, and wailed loudly, gritting his teeth.

Katniss didn't need him anymore, she didn't want him alive anymore. She despised him and looked at him as if he was doomed, and nothing could hurt more than that, not even a bullet in the stomach. He settled a hand over his uniform, on top of his scar, and gripped the grey material, his cries louder than before. Physical pain could be helped with medicine, but what could you do with a broken heart?

_" Will you stay with me? "_

Hearing this exact sentence in his head, he threw what was on his desk on the floor, screaming. He didn't need to remember that, all these sweet words that sounded like promises, he didn't want them anymore. They were useless now that the Capitol changed her. His mouth was trembling, just like his fingers, and he tried to get a grip on himself, he could handle this.

After a while, he collected Prim's notebook and put it back on top of his desk, letting out a shallow breath. He also took a pen and an eraser before seeking out the page where he drew his last sketch. It was when Seneca Crane announced that two victors from the same District could be crowned. Peeta remembered how hope crept in his mind when he heard these words, lying down next to the river. He drew for hours, stoping at the moment when Katniss found him, wounded and bleeding to death.

" I'm glad Katniss found Peeta, she looks happy to see that he's alive. I think she realized that he just wanted to help her from the beginning. I'm really glad, he's a good person. "

Peeta smiled, and remained drawing, deciding to picture the moment when Katniss threw the rocks around him away, slowly discovering his body, then the cut on his leg. At that moment, he really wished she would have moved on, and go away, because it would have made everything easier for her. She wouldn't have had to take care of him and be in that cave for days.

His hand ended up hurting badly, but he refused to stop drawing, refused to acknowledge the fact that he had to go to the canteen again. Hungry, he pushed the notebook away and stretched his arms over his head, yawning. He pulled down his pen and left his room, choosing the stairs for once. He took his tray, a plate full of spinaches and eggs waiting to be eaten on it.

_" Peeta, I'm glad you came early, " _Prim said, rushing to his side. _" I haven't seen Katniss at all this afternoon, I wonder if she's okay… "_

Peeta tilted his head to the right, _" I think she talked about spending it in Gale's room, don't worry, " _he told the girl.

_" How are you feeling? " _she asked, eyeing her plate. _" I know it must be hard for you, but I want to know. "_

The blond swallowed a spoon of vegetables, _" This is difficult for me, but I'm glad she's here with us, " _he replied, using his free hand to pat the girl's head. _" Somehow, I just want her to find happiness. "_

_" You really are a good guy, " _she giggled.

Peeta shook his head no, and started eating again, realizing the banana was once again on their trays. He pointed at his and Prim started laughing, nodding. He thought that focusing on the good things would help the hurt going away, but he wasn't fooling himself, it wouldn't last like the pain.

_" Prim, I told you to stay away from him, " _Katniss said, seating in front of them. _" How many times do I have to tell you that you can't talk to him? " _she asked, frowning.

Primrose lifted her shoulders slightly, _" I don't see how that's a bad thing, " _she mumbled.

Katniss' eyes widened and she slammed her fist on the table, _" You can not trust him, " _she groaned, articulating every syllable.

Peeta's hands started trembling, _" I'm the one that started talking, so please don't blame her, " _he announced.

Katniss looked startled for a moment, her mouth opening and closing without any word coming out. The blond looked at her right in the eyes, and thought that maybe hearing his voice reminded her of some things. He knew it wasn't much, but just the fact that she didn't immediately scream at him was pleasurable.

_" You think that any word coming out of your filthy mouth makes sense to me Mellark? " _Katniss asked, an evil smile on her mouth. _" Then you're fooling yourself. Don't think you can talk to me again. "_

She didn't even use his name, it felt as if they never met, never got to know each other. Peeta swallowed with difficulty, his throat thickening as Gale sat next to Katniss, the girl instantly pulling down her angry mask and smiling at her best friend. The blond knew that now that she hated him, she was finally able to give some importance to her feelings, and somehow it made him feel better. She could build a family of her own, have children and a husband. He laughed silently, taking a piece of egg in his spoon.

_" What's so funny Mellark? " _Katniss asked, her voice cold as ice. _" Could it be me? " _she added, frowning.

Peeta shook his head, _" No, no. Please don't mind me, " _he replied.

The boy knew he shouldn't get in her game and spit nasty things to her face. It wasn't her fault, he reminded himself again, she couldn't do anything about that, he told himself. He wondered for a moment, would Katniss act the same if she was in his shoes? No answer came, and he thought it was better, because it was useless to imagine that kind of situation.

_" I wish I could, but you're always here, " _Katniss mumbled, putting some of her black hair behind her ears. _" You keep coming back, again and again, " _she added. _" Why are you here? "_

Peeta decided not to answer anything, trying not to think about the meaning behind her words. She wanted him out of her sight, out of her life, and he wished he could want the same thing. No matter how mean she could be to him, how indifferent or how hateful, he couldn't bring himself to want to get away. He wasn't ready to let her go yet.

_" Why are you here anyway? " _Katniss asked again, her voice harassing Peeta. _" Why aren't you dead?! "_

This time, Peeta's body was faster than his mouth, and he got up, throwing his tray towards her, spinaches flying in the girl's face and hair. His eyes widened and he covered his mouth with his hands, trembling from head to toes. The blond clenched his teeth, closed his eyes, breathing through his nose loudly.

He opened his eyes, _" You can spit on my back all you want, but don't ask me why I'm still alive! " _he yelled, getting people's attention. _" You have no idea how many times I wished I was dead! "_

His chest was heaving rapidly, tears gathering in his eyes. Katniss froze in front of him, a hand in her black curls, her mouth opened wide. It seemed like she didn't find anything to answer to that.

* * *

**NDA: here's the 29th chapter!**

**I had a bad week, so I drowned myself in writing.**

**It really is painful to write this kind of chapter, I promise, it hurts.**

**Hope you liked it,**

**bisous.**


	30. Chapter 30 : I've had worse

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 30: I've had worse**

Peeta felt tears rolling down his cheeks, and he looked away from Katniss, biting the inside of his cheeks. Gale shot him a dark glare and hugged the brunette, telling her it was alright, the girl instantly wrapping her arms around her best friend's torso. She started wailing, and the blond sat back down, his head low. Taking his spoon again, he looked down at the few spinaches that didn't fly towards Katniss, tears flowing silently.

_" Katniss, please look at me, " _Gale begged, frowning. _" Look at me Catnip, come on, " _he insisted, a hand under her chin.  
The girl moaned, looking up, _" I want him to disappear Gale, " _she said, her voice trembling just like her hands. _" Can't he just go away? "_

The blond looked up from his tray, and Katniss' gaze met his. Her eyes widened when she saw his face. The boy knew he was trembling all the way down his neck. There was some sort of pain in his eyes no one could deny or ignore.  
Peeta wished he could be stronger and just move on, wished it could be like when they were both living in 12 and she didn't even acknowledge his existence. He remembered liking her from afar, accepting the fact that she would never notice him. The Games changed everything, making him try to do anything to protect her, even lying. And after the announcement of the Quarter Quell, he thought that they got closer, but he wasn't sure anymore. Even if such a progress happened, it didn't mean a thing now that the Capitol changed Katniss, it just meant nothing.

_" Don't worry Katniss, I'm leaving, " _he sighed, getting up and taking his tray. _" I will see Coin and tell her about this table problem. "  
_Gale frowned and shook his head, _" You don't have to do this Peeta, " _he said, patting the brunette's head.  
_" I know I don't have to, but I'm going to do it anyway, " _the blond answered. _" It's the best decision, for all of us, and you know it. "_

Katniss' best friend didn't reply, and simply nodded, then Peeta left the table, his heart big and heavy in his chest. He got rid of his tray and walked out of the cafeteria, heading towards the Commandment Center. The president wasn't inside, and the doors were locked, so the boy sat down, willing to have this conversation as soon as possible. Coin would probably reject his request, but he had to try, for Katniss' sanity and his. They couldn't go on like this, it was already exhausting for both of them and it was only the first day.

_" What are you doing here Mr Mellark? " _a male voice asked, making Peeta jolt.  
The boy stood up, then bowed his head slightly, _" Secondhand Boggs. Well, I wanted to talk to the President, " _he answered, his voice shaking.  
_" Is it so important that you can't wait until morning? " _the black man asked, curving an eyebrow at Peeta's answer.  
The blond cleared his throat, staring down at his feet, _" I have a request for the President, and I would have liked to get a reply before breakfast, " _he said.

_" You should go take a shower and get some sleep soldier Mellark, President Coin won't come here tonight. She is already in her quarters, " _Boggs explained, walking away.

The boy sighed, there was no use staying in this cold and unwelcoming corridor, so he took the elevator and went back to his room. He drew a few more sketches, then took a towel and his pajama, locking the door behind him. Under the tepid water, he thought about his life, about what he would have to do next. An expedition to the Capitol was scheduled, and Peeta could imagine that the goal would be to execute President Snow. It seemed so huge that he couldn't wrap his mind around the idea, and at the same time, he knew a lot of people would love to push the trigger and release the bullet that would erase the man from this planet. He was definitely one of these people. This man took everything he had, in a way or another. First, his innocence and youth, by forcing him into the Hunger Games, then his family, and last -but not least- Katniss, the only person he cared about and needed. He felt anger and determination run through his veins and he knew he couldn't die just yet, not before President Snow got killed like he deserved it.

Exiting the cabin, he rubbed his head with his towel, drops of water falling on the grey floor. He stopped in front of a mirror and brushed both his hair and teeth, noticing how sick he looked. Dark circles under his blue eyes looked like they were now part of his appearance. Wrinkles started to form between his eyebrows, and the hollowness of his cheeks was alarming, making his jawline look even stronger than before. Sighing, he left the bathrooms, throwing his uniform into the laundry basket. He isolated himself inside his room again, walls still desperately green.

All he wanted to do was sleep so morning would come faster, but when he lied under his covers, he found that he wasn't feeling tired. Turning in his bed, he forced his eyes shut, but after ten minutes, he decided to take Prim's notebook and read the pages she marked. He turned on the lights, deciding to start where he stopped drawing. He let Katniss' little sister's words take him away. He appreciated how she could depict anything with a pencil. What he liked the most were the parts in which she added her own opinion about what was happening in the arena or in the Capitol. It comforted him, strangely.

" I hope Peeta won't die because of his wound. It looks really serious, and to be honest, I'm afraid.

Katniss looks really concerned about this boy, and I'm sure he's important to her because of that rainy day, years ago. She told me that he was the boy with the bread when she finally came back home, soaking wet. She said he was the boy that saved our family with some burned loafs. Maybe this is why I feel like she can trust him, and I hope I'm not wrong. It would be such a waste if I was. "

The blond smiled, these few sentences, as simple as they could be, brightened his mind. He knew Katniss would be lost after reading all of these notes, because she had a new opinion about him, the one Snow implanted in her mind. The man did probably find a way to change her memories, to make her believe that he was a manipulative asshole with no feelings. Peeta didn't know if this kind of thing was possible, but he wouldn't be surprised if it was. He was sure that President Snow would do anything to keep his power, no matter how inhuman the treatments and methods might be.

" Katniss got back from the Cornucopia, she's wounded, but she has Peeta's medicine. I think he's disappointed that she poured some sleeping syrup in his soup and risked her life for him, but I don't think he's really upset.  
I feel like having Peeta by her side helps Katniss getting through the Games, like he's an emotional tether of hers. All I can say is that they're really attached to each other and that they're not afraid to rely on one another. I think the fact that both of them can win and leave the arena is an important aspect. In my opinion, it helped Katniss believing in Peeta, accepting that he saved her against the Careers and I'm pretty sure she never really wanted to kill him personally.

They share a bond that is totally different from the one Katniss and Gale have, even thought I can't explain in which way. "

Peeta exhaled loudly, of course their relationships were different. In fact, he thought they were worlds apart. Gale and Katniss knew each other for years, they were almost family. The girl trusted him, relied on him and loved him. On the other hand, Katniss and him were still strangers after the Games, but colliding endlessly. At some point, Peeta felt as if her and him were meant to find each other in terrible situations, over and over. It could sound like fate, but this one wasn't as pleasurable as you might think it would be.

" I knew Katniss would make it, I knew it but still, I'm glad, so glad, so, so glad.

Peeta was willing to die to let her win the Games, but she refused categorically. There is this strange connection between the two of them, quiet and invisible, but it's there, I feel it. They are both refusing to see the other die, and I think it's because they can't think that living would be possible without the other. I'm still convinced that it's related to that time Peeta threw Katniss the bread. I'm sure it is.  
I talked about the relationship they shared before, and I can confirm it now. These two exchange a lot without even talking, as if the link between them was stronger than words or actions and could go even further than promises. You can feel that link between them, but you just cannot put a name on it. There's no way in this world you could label it. "

His throat thickening painfully, Peeta closed the notebook, his fingers sliding over the leather cover. That was more than enough for one day. Reading these notes made him go back in the arena, reminding him of all the questions he had been asking to himself, knowing he probably would never get an answer to them. He pushed the notebook on his tiny nightstand and turned off the lights, lying back under his grey covers. For a while, he stared at the green ceiling, thinking about Katniss, the one he fell in love with, and didn't even feel himself drifting into sleep.

_" I just want to spend every possible minute of the rest of my life with you. " _

_" Come on, then. "_

He opened his eyes, blood pumping at his temple, heart beating erratically in his chest. He remembered this perfectly. It was the first night Katniss and him slept in the same bed since the 74th Hunger Games, in the tributes' center. Right after that, she pulled him into her room, and put her head on top of his torso, right above his heart. He had wrapped his arms around her shoulders, and they fell asleep. Craving for her presence by his side, he didn't wake up to a nightmare that night, and she told him she didn't either. This all seemed so far away, yet so close in time. One look to his left and he saw on the tiny clock that it was three in the morning. A dream had woken him up, and at that point, it didn't surprise him. Most of them were related to Katniss, which made them less appreciable than before. Bitterness was left in each memory they shared, but Peeta preferred melancholic dreams to bloody nightmares. He rolled on his side and soon, he fell asleep for the second time that night.  
His alarm rang and he stopped it, yawning and stretching in his bed. The blond stayed under the covers for a while, waiting for the fog of sleepiness to go away. It was really early in the morning, and he was almost sure neither Katniss or Gale would be in the cafeteria. This made him get up, change into his uniform and leave his room. All he wanted was to avoid the pair of two friends, because every time they were in the same room, things went down. Peeta took the stairs and entered an almost empty canteen. He let out a sigh when he noticed Primrose, reading on their common table.

_" Good morning Prim, " _he breathed out, smiling. _" You're early today. "  
_The girl got on her feet and pulled him in a warm embrace, _" I was hoping I could see you, " _she explained, her head buried in the blond's chest. _" How are you doing? "  
_Peeta smiled sadly, _" I wasn't expecting Katniss to be… this aggressive towards me, and it makes things tougher than I imagined, " _he replied. _" Wait a minute, I have to get my tray. "_

He headed back to where all the plates were, and took the one with his name. Scrambled eggs, a glass of soya milk and half an orange were composing the breakfast of the day. He sat next to Prim and they ate, trying to find out what exactly happened to the girl's older sister. Each conclusion was unpleasant but denying wasn't comforting either.

_" if they did brainwash her, she wouldn't be out of hospital just yet, " _Prim stated, chewing on a piece of egg. _" I think Snow ordered his doctors to do something that couldn't be noticeable. This would totally make sense. "  
_Peeta nodded sadly, _" Which also means that it will be close to impossible to get her back, " _he sighed.

Katniss' sister patted his shoulder with a slight smile on her lips, because she knew how bad the situation was for the boy. Nobody could start to imagine how he could be feeling, and almost nobody was trying to do so. Only Finnick and herself were fighting to get the blond to smile again, and to make him cheer up. Peeta was the only one that wasn't comfortable with Katniss' return, and Prim couldn't blame him for that.

_" I'll try to ask my mom about it, okay? " _her clear voice proposed.  
Peeta closed his eyes, exhaled loudly, _" That would be amazing, but I'm not sure she will see how her daughter is wrong. Because in fact, she isn't. "_

Gale and Katniss walked in the cafeteria, heading towards the trays, and Peeta straightened up on his chair. He rubbed a hand over Prim's smaller one and gave a nod before getting up. He didn't want to look at them, but his eyes were attracted to Katniss' silhouette. His throat thickened and he lowered his head, throwing his plate and walking inside the elevator. Before the metallic doors could close, he caught a glimpse of Gale holding Katniss' hand in hers while they held their trays in their free arms. The boy bit the inside of his cheeks as the machine started moving up, taking him to the level of the Commandment Center, he had to talk with the President soon. Peeta got there and gave the doors two strong knocks. They opened and Coin was standing with files under her arms, curving an eyebrow at the blond.

_" I don't think I scheduled the meeting for this morning, soldier Mellark, " _she announced, staring down at him.  
He bowed his head, _" The reason of my presence is different from today's reunion President, " _he explained.  
_" My secondhand told me you were waiting for me quite late yesterday, " _Coin said, ignoring Peeta's answer.  
The boy nodded, _" In fact I was. And it isn't about the Capitol mission. "  
_Coin sighed,_ " Well, then come in, " _she stated, taking a step aside to let the boy in.  
The silver-haired woman closed the doors behind her and turned on her heels, facing the blond, walking along the conference table. He let his fingers slid over the cold material of it and stopped, looking up at Coin.

_" So, what is it all about? " _the president of the District asked. _" What could be wrong this time? " _she breathed out, putting a hand over her temple.  
Peeta cleared his throat, _" I wanted to know if it was possible for me to change the table I eat at, " _he replied, tensed up.  
_" And why's that? " _the woman asked, taking a few steps closer to him. _" What is exactly not right about this table? Aren't you happy to be close to Miss Everdeen again? " _she continued, her head tilting to her left. _" I thought it would be a pleasant thing for you, soldier Mellark. "  
_The boy frowned, _" It sounds like you ignore how Katniss is behaving when I'm around, President. "_

Coin pulled a chair and sat on it, inviting Peeta to do the same. They stared at each other, silence settling around them as the woman crossed her legs and put her files on her lap.

_" Please, tell me about it, " _she said, motioning for him to keep going. _" Enlighten me. "  
_The blond took a deep breath, _" It appears that she can't stand me, she wants me dead, President. "  
__" Well, I have to admit that I wasn't expecting that, "_ she replied, her eyes as hollow as ever. _" Do you have any idea why? "  
_Peeta shook his head, _" I am not sure about it, but I think President Snow altered the idea she has of me. "  
__" Soldier Mellark, our doctors did all the requested tests when she came in 13, and nothing abnormal had been found, " _Coin sighed. _" And our medical staff is as good as it could be. "  
_The blond lowered his gaze, _" I'm not questioning their abilities, I just want not to cause Katniss any trouble, " _he stated. _" This is why I would like not to share her table any longer, President. "  
__" That's fine by me. You'll both be leaving the District in less than a week anyway, " _the woman told Peeta.

The boy's eyes widened, and he looked up at Coin. She was right, the expedition to execute Snow was about to begin any day, and she couldn't careless about the canteen's repartition. He sighed in relief and bowed his head.

_" Thank you, President, " _he said, smiling.  
She nodded, _" Perhaps you'd like to sit with your friend, the soldier Odair? " _she suggested in a cold voice.  
_" Sure, that would be delightful, " _Peeta replied fast. _" I'd really appreciate that, President. "_The woman gave a crooked smile, _" Then it's done. You can leave now. "  
_Peeta got up and bowed ceremonially, Coin following him to the door. He thanked her again, and walked out of the Commandment Center.  
_" I'll see you later, for our reunion, " _the President said. _" At 4 PM. "_

The blond nodded and Coin closed the door behind him. That was a good thing, even thought they'd still have to see each other during the meetings, and probably in the training center. Peeta sighed and headed towards his room, to take Prim's notebook to the library, and fill it there. He sat at an empty table and pulled out his pencils and his eraser, opening the heavy book and turned the pages to finish his previous drawing.  
He remained adding some shadows on the sketch he did of Katniss finding him in the arena, then skipped some pages that her sister didn't mark. Tears were on the edge of dropping when he realized he had to draw one of their kisses, the one where Katniss' wound reopened. He sharpened his pencil and tried not to focus on the people appearing on the page. Drawing had always been an escape for him, a way to express himself, and he couldn't push it away because the memories it brought back made him sad. Peeta thought about how happy Prim would be when she would see her notebook, and kept that in mind to continue.  
Hours passed, and the blond's stomach growled, reminding him about lunch. He closed the notebook and stopped by his room to put it safe. When he walked in the cafeteria, he noticed the blond girl watching him walk away from their table with his tray, and felt guilty. Of course, it was better for Katniss', but he would miss talking with Prim in the morning. He settled down next to Finnick and Annie, a smile on his lips.

_" Hey mate, what are you doing here? It's not like I want you to leave or anything, but seriously, you'll get in trouble, " _the blond asked, worried. _" Why aren't you seating with the Everdeen and the Hawthorne? "  
_Peeta smiled, _" I switched tables, it's better this way, " _he simply replied, cutting his fish.  
_" Coin allowed that? That's nice, and strange, from her, " _Finnick stated, curving an eyebrow at his friend. _" Anyway, here's Annie. "  
_The smaller blond bowed his head and offered a hand, _" Nice to finally get to meet you, I'm Peeta. "_

The ginger girl smiled and shook his hand hesitantly. Peeta was glad they were finally together, and was selfishly jealous of that. But his own problems didn't really matter at that point, he was happy for his friend. Finnick had never looked this alive, and it was a sight the blond was welcoming with his arms wide open.

_" Finnick told me a lot about you, " _Annie said, her head low. _" Thank you for being there for him all this time. "  
_Peeta smiled, _" You're welcome, he's my friend. It's natural to be there for each other, " _he answered.

They chatted while they all ate, and Peeta felt less anxious than usual as he didn't need to worry about hearing some verbal attacks constantly. Still, he hoped he could be able to be friends with Katniss again one day, because he still cared about her, and wanted to be by her side. He didn't really care if she got with someone else than him, as their relationship started based on a lie. Sure, it still hurt him but he thought he could accept seeing her with another man, as long as she was happy. Peeta finished his rice calmly and left the cafeteria with Finnick and Annie, discussing over the coming expedition to the Capitol. As they put their tray down, Katniss and Gale ran into them.

_" Finnick how are you? I haven't seen you in the training center lately, " _Gale said, rubbing the blond's shoulder.  
Finnick smiled, _" Yeah I know, but I want to stay with Annie as much as I can, " _he replied.  
_" Well, feel free to join Katniss and I anytime you want, " _Gale told him.

Peeta's eyes were on the floor, and he decided to leave without the others, not willing to get into a fight with the brunette. That was without Gale taking one of his arms in his big hand and making him turn around.

_" Hey Peeta, " _he started, smiling. _" You should come too. "_

The blond shot a quick glance at Katniss, and saw her features getting harder, so he nodded absently. He chose to look at Gale and not take care of the girl in his back, holding his waist tightly. All he had to do was not to start a conversation with her, then they'd both be fine.

_" Thanks, I'll… " _Peeta breathed out. _" I-I'll think about it, " _he stuttered.  
Katniss snorted loudly, _" Then please come when I'm not here. "  
__" I-I will do that Katniss, sure, " _the blond answered, lowering his head.

The boy walked away from the group that kept talking, and took the stairs. He stopped halfway to his level, and sat down, taking his head in his hands. He wished he could be strong enough and bear with the situation, Katniss despising him. Only, he kept remembering about what they shared before Snow took her away and altered her, and it didn't make things easy. Just the way she looked at him made him want to crawl up in his room and never leave it again. He looked at his bracelet, the meeting didn't start before three hours, so he decided to head to the training center, to change his mind.  
He ran down the stairs he climbed and ended at the bottom, where he pushed a set of doors. The hall was almost empty, a few soldiers running and shooting independently. Peeta ran a hand through his hair and took a towel, then settled in a corner where he stretched silently. After twenty minutes, he got up and started running around the hangar, shooting anxious looks around him. He didn't want Katniss to come in and see him, she'd find something to say about his presence in the center. He could easily imagine the kind of insults she would spit to his face. Ten minutes later, he took a crossbow from an assistant and started shooting. Somehow, he did great, and moved on to some wrestling.

Jazz was there, fighting against someone from the center, and smiled when he noticed the blond. As he waved at Peeta, the man punched him in the face and a cracking noise echoed in the hangar. The blond rushed towards the boy and helped him on his feet, handing him a fresh towel.

_" Hey, are you alright? " _he asked, worried.  
The brunette nodded, _" I think so, I've had worse, " _Jazz replied, blood dripping from his cheek.

A huge bruise started to appear and extend over the boy's eye, and the blond frowned, looking at it closely. It wasn't too bad nor deep, but the eye was swollen, and Peeta was sure that the boy couldn't see from this side anymore. The blond checked Jazz's neck, and shook his head slightly.

_" You should go to the hospital, " _he told the taller boy. _" They'll give you something for your eye, and they'll see your neck. "  
_Jazz nodded, _" Sure, thank you Peeta. "_

Jazz left the training center with a hand over his eye and Peeta walked on the carpet where the assistant was waiting. He settled down his towel and got in position. The man jumped on him, but the blond dodged him and hit him in the torso, the man jumping back. Peeta took a step closer and tried to catch him over the waist, but the man slapped his arms away, and kicked his fake ankle. The blond fell on his butt, quickly jumping on his feet again, panting hard. The assistant pushed him back, but Peeta turned around and kicked him in the back, right between his shoulder blades. The man coughed and punched Peeta in the shoulder, the boy wailing in pain. Peeta took the arm the man was aiming towards him, pulled on it then lifted the assistant over his shoulders. He then threw him on the carpet, his face red from the effort. He turned the man on his belly and locked his arms in his back, then sat on top of him.

_" Congratulations soldier, you win that, " _the man breathed out under him. _" Could you please, get off me now? "  
_Peeta obeyed and helped the assistant up, _" That was a good fight. "  
__" A little short if you ask me, " _the man sighed. _" Now please, move on. "_

Peeta bowed his head and took his towel to wipe his face and neck. These uniforms weren't exactly comfortable for sport or combat, and the fabric rubbed painfully against the skin of his leg. He sat down for a while, massaging his shoulder as he watched at the next fight, the assistant being replaced by Paylor herself. He never saw her fight, even when they trained together because he was too focused on his own tasks. The woman was really fast, and even thought she was thin, she knew perfectly where to hit. The soldier against her was now jumping in small circles around her, trying to find an angle the chief wasn't protecting.

The blond lifted his pants to check his fake leg, and noticed a cavity. He sighed and knew he had to see Beetee before the meeting, in order to put it back in order. He looked at Paylor's fight again, and could see that the boy was out of breath, tired of running aimlessly around the woman. A smile crept on his face, and Paylor suddenly jumped, kicking the soldier in the neck with her feet before falling down on her hands and feet. She sure was skilled, he never saw anyone using that kind of technique before, but apparently, it worked. The boy was lying on his side, breathing heavily. Paylor ordered the assistants to get him out of the center, then took a bottle of water and drank from it. She noticed he was staring, so she sat next to him on the floor.

_" Shall we fight? " _she suggested, running a hand over her sweaty forehead.  
Peeta shook his head no, _" I'd like to, but my fake leg isn't ready for that, " _he declined politely.  
_" Then we'll do it some other time, " _Paylor said, sighing.

They stayed side by side, commenting on the other soldier's strengths and weaknesses. The boy learned a lot about things that you should avoid into a close fight, and knew he would never forget them. As Paylor told him about the current fight's problems, the doors opened, and Katniss walked in alone. Peeta looked at his feet, as the chief continued her detailed comment. The brunette stretched, her braid hovering closer to the ground as she bent forwards. The blond's heart skipped a beat when she started rolling her hips around, her gaze lost in front of her. While the chief kept talking, Peeta didn't listen, too lost in his observation. Katniss just started jogging slowly, soldiers stopping what they were doing to stare at her too. The blond hoped she wouldn't notice his presence.

_" Oh, Katniss is here again, " _Paylor breathed out. _" I think she spends more than six hours here everyday. Perhaps she tries to keep her mind off something, probably whatever happened to her in the Capitol. "_

Peeta didn't react, didn't answer as Katniss headed towards the bow and crossbow stand. An assistant waited by her side with a huge amount of arrows as the brunette stopped in front of the first target. From where he was, the blond could only see her profile, but he could picture the face she was making, he saw it many times. She released the arrow, and it hit the center, unsurprisingly.

_" I'm pretty sure she imagines Snow's face on those targets, " _Paylor stated. _" I think most of us do. "_

* * *

**NDA: I'm very late, and also very sorry.**

**I had to prepare my exams, and spent a lot of time with my family and friends.**

**Anyway, here's the 30th chapter beautiful readers.**

**See you in the next one,**

**bisous. :)**


	31. Chapter 31 : I guess we'll work it out

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 31 : I guess we'll work it out**

Peeta didn't need to approve Paylor's words, he knew very well that she told the truth. Most of the country wanted to see their president's head separated from its body. He breathed out and kept watching Katniss's arrows hit the center of each target, still fascinated by her skills. The boy got up and saluted the chief. He was sad to see that the camouflage stand wasn't available that day, but decided to watch the swords fights.

He never really liked practicing it, but that day it would have been great as he needed to get rid of some tension building up. Even thought he didn't participate in any activity, he heard every advise the assistant was telling to the soldiers and kept notes of it. The boy dared to peek at the brunette, and she apparently stopped shooting, sitting next to Gale close to the stand. They seemed to be discussing while they observed the hangar. Peeta sat, trying not to look at the pair, and downed half of his water. He ran his towel over his arms, his neck and his face.

_" It's strange to see you here on your own buddy, " _a voice told him in his back. _" Care if I join? "  
_Peeta turned his head, then shook it, _" No, of course, come. "  
__" So Katniss is here, " _Finnick sighed pointing at her with his chin. _" It must be hard for you. "  
_Peeta lifted his shoulders, _" I guess I'll have to deal with the situation. It's not like I have a choice, " _he answered.

The taller blond bit his bottom lip and wrapped an arm around the smaller one's shoulders. Peeta was thankful for that kind of attention, and managed a tired smile to extend on his mouth.

_" How about a shooting session? " _Finnick suggested, squeezing him. _" It's been a while. "  
_Peeta gave a nod, and they stood up, _" Sure, even though I'm scared by the result, " _he laughed weakly.

This was the only thing he could afford with his damaged prothesis. They got to the gun stand, and the assistant gave them two of those, with white bullets. They thanked him and positioned themselves in front of the human-shaped targets. Peeta took a deep breath and caught it, pressing the trigger. Just as he expected, it didn't find aim where it should have, but against the bulletproof wall. He groaned, disappointed by himself.

_" Don't be so dense Peeta, it's just training, " _Finnick told him.

The blond agreed and tried to relax before trying another time. He closed his eyes and got everything that wasn't a target out of his mind; Katniss, Snow, the mission. It wasn't an easy task to complete, so he lowered his gun, hearing the sound of bullets finding aim around him. When he opened his eyes, he instantly pulled the trigger and watched the projectile hit the center of the human-shaped target. Finnick congratulated him and they kept exercising, their shots getting better with time. After a couple minutes, they gave back the weapons. Peeta saw his friend tense up on his right, and followed his gaze. The brunette was standing still, frozen by apparent disgust as her bow trembled in her hands.

_" I thought that I clearly told you not to come here when I'm present, " _she breathed out, the muscles our her arms clenching spastically. _" What are you doing? "  
_Peeta took a deep breath, daring to take a direct look at her, _" I was already here when you walked in, I'm sorry Katniss, " _he replied, his voice shakier and higher than he wished it was.  
_" And you couldn't just leave? Was it too hard for your small brain to process? " _the girl bit back, taking a step closer to the pair of blonds.  
Finnick pushed Peeta away, _" Come on Katniss, he comes here for the same reason as you, to get rid of all the tension building up inside of him, " _he told the brunette, frowning. _" It's already tough for him to have you attacking him every time you cross each other's path, " _he continued, defending the smaller blonde. _" Just let him train, you don't actually have to talk. "_

Peeta lowered both his head and gaze, staring at his grey shoes while Finnick and Katniss kept arguing about his presence in the hangar. He tried not to hear the girl's harsh words and various insults thrown his way, feeling uneasy just like Gale, standing behind the brunette.

_" No, I don't want him to be in the training center while I'm exercising, you don't understand! " _the girl said through gritted teeth, her eyes burning with anger. _" I don't want to see him, to hear about him, to hear his voice or to be reminded of the fact that he's in the same district as me! So, to make it possible, we have to avoid each other, " _she growled.  
Finnick rolled his eyes excessively and let out a long sigh, _" You are being childish here Katniss. Just let the boy live, " _he answered, annoyed by the conversation. _" He is a soldier too and he has to train for the next mission. "  
__" He will be part of it?! " _the brunette yelled, her eyes wide open. _" There's no way I will accept to be in his squad! I'll go speak with President Coin! "_

She turned around and pulled her best friend by his wrist, taking him out of the center. Peeta was feeling down, in low spirits after that encounter. It staggered him and he wanted to forget all about it, but that wasn't something he could just decide to do. He looked at Finnick and smiled, patting his shoulder as a thank you.

_" It's not getting better, " _his friend said, shaking his head sadly. _" I hope that one day she'll learn to love you again, " _he added.  
Peeta nodded, _" I'm not wishing for that much, I just want her to not despise me, that's all. I want her to bear with my presence, " _he uttered in a sigh.

The blond refused to drop the opportunity he had been given to join the Capitol squad, no matter how much Katniss hated it. It was the only thing he personally wanted to be part of, and he wasn't going to let it pass him by. There was so little he still had for himself, from family to friends including Katniss herself, that he was willing to fight for his right to go there. He prayed that the President wouldn't let the girl push him aside and tell him he couldn't go.

_" Do you think Coin will accept her request? " _he asked in a low voice, his gaze lost in front of him.  
Finnick pouted for a moment, then shook his head, _" No way, she promised you, " _he replied. _" She might be heartless, but she sticks to her words, " _he left obliged to add seeing Peeta's unconvinced expression.  
_" Let's hope she will in front of the mockingjay herself, " _the smaller blond sighed.

The younger boy wished he could move on and just forget about this incident with Katniss, but all his brain seemed to be able to do was to remind him about it. He decided to watch Finnick train with his trident, dodging and hitting an invisible enemy effortlessly. His eyes were focused on his friend, his arms prolonged by the weapon as if it was a part of him, like longer fingertips. He envied his ability in combat, even thought he shouldn't be needing it in the first place. Peeta thought that Finnick would rather be in District 4 with Annie, swimming and having a good time in the bright daylight, but it was anything but possible. He stayed, sitting next to the stand and after twenty minutes, his friend uttered a sigh and took his towel to wipe the sweat dropping on his forehead and arms.

_" I bet you're drenched, let's leave and shower, " _Peeta suggested, getting up, his real leg sore from not moving. _" Unless you want to keep exercising of course, " _he added.  
Finnick grinned, _" I'm fine, and the reunion will start soon, so I can't stay, " _he replied, nodding. _" Let's go. "_

They walked out of the hangar and both agreed to take the elevator, too tired to climb stairs. Each of them stopped by his room to put a clean uniform on, then they met in front of the bathrooms, then entered too adjacent cabins. Peeta did his best to cool his mind after the events of the day, and thought about the coming meeting in the Commandment Center. They would discuss about the squad's repartition, the route to the Capitol and the weapons Beetee made. He knew other topics would be mentioned, but all he was thinking about was Katniss asking for him not to be part of his team. He highly doubted that the President could care about such things, because she was self-centered and couldn't bring herself to worry about other's well being. Both boys dried themselves and exited their cabins.

_" I'm worried about Coin's response to her request, " _Peeta sighed.  
Finnick looked at this friend smiling, _" Don't worry, it will be okay. She doesn't really care about any of us anyway, " _he answered, trying to comfort the smaller blond.  
Peeta nodded weakly, _" I'm sure it won't change anything if we're not in the same squad. So maybe it's better if we're apart, " _he said, finally deciding it was the wisest choice. _" I mean, I'll have more chances to come back alive. "  
__" Don't say that, she might get softer towards you with time, " _Finnick explained, hopeful. _" I think you should give Prim her notebook earlier than you wanted to, this way Katniss will have some time to read it. "_

Peeta thought about this option, and it wasn't stupid, and nothing bad could come out of it. He left Finnick and headed towards his room. He entered it and shot a glare at Prim's notebook. He wanted to draw but knew he had to see Beetee for his fake leg, so he exited it and took the stairs to reach the man's laboratory. The blond gave the doors two knocks and waited for any answer from the inside. The ex-tribute appeared and lifted his eyebrows when he saw the boy.

_" Is there anything I can do for you? I'm kinda busy, " _he asked, rolling back inside the corridor.  
Peeta nodded, _" Yes, I think my prothesis needs some fixing, " _he replied.

Beetee smiled and motioned for him to follow. He passed the few required tests to be granted access in the room, then they entered it. Peeta undid his belt and pulled down his pants, the only way for him to show his leg. The man pushed his wheelchair forward and took a good look at the prothesis, then pouted.

_" You'll have to remove it if you want me to repair it, " _he announced.

Peeta obeyed and undid the multiple locks that maintained the fake leg in place. The whole engine that made it move like a normal one had to be disabled, but the boy knew exactly how to put it off and on again. He gave the prothesis to the man and stared at the stump at the end of his thigh. It reminded him of the Games, of Cato, of the rain and the beef stew. When he removed the tourniquet that night, he never imagined he could survive such a huge blood loss combined to blood poisoning. Beetee put the prothesis on a table and pulled out some tools, including an electric drill. The blond stared at what he was doing, sitting on a chair with one leg missing.

Half an hour later, the engineer was done and Peeta put his prothesis back on, Beetee helping him in the process. The blond thanked him and got up, checking for any problem. He ran around the laboratory, crouched and jumped, but it was perfectly fine.

_" Thanks Beetee, " _he said, bowing his head.  
The man shook his head, _" It's normal. This cavity could have gotten worse and you could've ended with a leg without any foot underneath it. Not really practical is it? " _he explained, smiling.  
_" Then I'll see you in the Commandment Center, " _Peeta stated.

He left and stopped by the library to read Harry Potter and the Half-blood prince. And hour later, the blond shot a quick glance at his bracelet and closed the book, then heading towards the Commandment Center. He didn't fear anything regarding this subject, the only thing he was scared of was seeing Katniss. When he got inside, she was already there, sitting next to her best friend, their hands linked between their chairs. He made his way towards an empty chair and waited for the rest of the squad to arrive. Whispers where coming to his ears but Peeta ignored them. Finnick joined him and sat on his left, then Cressida took the available chair on his right.

_" Now that everybody's here, we can start this meeting, " _Coin said, getting up. She pulled a piece of paper out of her files and cleared her throat. _" All of you are part of the Capitol intervention which goal is taking President Snow as a prisoner. If you kill him, there will be no justice, and you'll be in trouble for assassinating the president. "_

Katniss got up and stopped in front of the silver-haired woman, guards running and taking her arms. They pulled her back in her chair and Coin smiled, as if she knew that the girl was going to do that.

_" All he deserves is death! " _Katniss yelled. _" You want him alive?! This man and his government put thousands of children in an arena to kill each other! He and his peacekeepers tortured and executed thousands more people and you want to make him talk in front of a Capitol's judge?! That's nonsense! "  
_Coin shook her head slightly, _" My dear, do you really think I'm not smart enough? Why would I have some of his people sentence him? We'll have our assembly here. Don't think I'll let him have a decent life after all that happened under his command. "_

Peeta rolled his eyes, the president of 13 was trying to get Katniss on her side by using sweet words? She obviously didn't know the girl at all. Of course she wanted to see Snow being hanged.

Katniss growled, _" I don't know if I will be able to bring him here alive, " _she stated.  
Coin curved an eyebrow, _" Then, you'd expose yourself to possible death. As much as we dislike President Snow's behavior, he has to be judged. Anyway, let's start! " _Coin shouted. _" You will be divided in two groups of a dozen soldiers. The first one will be constituted of my secondhand Boggs, Gale Hawthorne, Katniss Everdeen, Finnick Odair, Leeg 1, Leeg 2, Jackson, Castor, Pollux, Peeta Mellark and Cressida, " _she started, reading from her paper. _" No negotiations allowed, " _she added when she saw Katniss open her mouth. _" This group is the main one, and thanks to Cressida, Castor and Pollux, we'll film every step you'll take in the Capitol. "_

So they were going to be together, for God knows how long. This was going to be strange and difficult if she wanted him out of her life. It would be acceptable if a peacekeeper or a bomb could kill him instead of her. That was not the way he wanted to go, being shot in his sleep by his fiance.

_" The second group will be leaving the train first, just in case of an ambush. Mr Latier and I will follow the first one and give indications on the way to Snow's residence. You'll have to get it by night, so you'll be sure of his presence inside the walls. This part will be the hardest, you'll have to be discreet and fast, " _Coin explained. _" The squads leaders, Boggs and Paylor, will have what we call a Holo. It's an object from Mr Latier's invention, and I'll let him show you how it works, " _she added.

The black haired man rolled in front of the president and thanked her. He got a small object out of a cardboard box and turned it on. It looked like a strange bracelet with a huge green screen, perhaps a watch. An hologram appeared, but Peeta couldn't quite understand what it was representing.

_" This small thing will be your map, and will only get access to someone that has its passcode. The Capitol's security has increased since the rescue and a lot of traps have been set up on the way you will be taking. The Holo will let you know about those that I could list until today. Which means you will still have to be slow and watchful, " _he told the soldiers. _" If the owner of the code dies, we'll deliver it by the earpiece each of you will have. " _he added, adjusting his glasses. _" Oh, one last thing. This device can also serve as a time bomb. But remember that as long as you're in the city and not in Snow's residence, this apparatus can save your life. "_

He bowed his head and Coin clapped her hands, taking a few steps forward to face the soldiers.

_" The mission will be launched in exactly three days, the time Mr Latier needs to finish some special weapons. An hovercraft will lead you to the first train station that is still working, and the second squad will take the first train. The main one will leave an hour later, once we are sure that the perimeter is secured, " _she said. _" You will all have regular maps on which some of our citizen marked the camps of allies you'll be able to find on your way. "  
_Boggs got up and next to the president, _" We'll need to be as close as possible to survive this one. Last time was child's play, this is the real deal. We will have to rely on each other, no matter what. If only one of us doesn't trust the others, we might all end up dead, " _he stated, staring at Katniss.  
Coin thanked the man, _" Now, if there's any question, let's hear it. We'll have a meeting everyday to talk about more precise topics, " _she announced.

Katniss raised a hand, and Peeta stared at her in disbelief. He knew what she wanted, and he knew she wasn't going to get a positive answer from the President.

_" Yes Miss Everdeen? " _the silver-haired woman sighed.  
The brunette got up, her hands turning into fists, _" If trust is that important in our squads, why did you put him in mine? " _she growled, pointing at the blond. _" I don't think you quite understand the situation Mrs President. If you put both of us in that squad, one will die, " _she said.

The tone in her voice frightened Peeta to the bones, and he felt a cold shiver run down his back. She couldn't even imagine being able to team up with him without murdering him. It couldn't be worse.

_" I thought I said there would be no negotiations about the squads' composition Miss Everdeen. Didn't I mention it? " _Coin asked, visibly annoyed.  
Katniss groaned, _" You don't understand! He's not my lover, he's not my friend, he is nothing! " _she yelled, a guard pushing her down on her chair. _" He is nothing and I won't share his squad! "  
__" Nothing is still better than enemy, don't you think? " _the president asked, smiling.

Katniss froze, her eyes opening widely as her mouth hanged open without any sound escaping it. The reaction startled Peeta because he was convinced she would scream back that she hated him; only she didn't. She was still staring at Coin, her lips starting to tremble just like the rest of her body.

_" Miss Everdeen, I'm sure your mentor already told you this, but remember who the real enemy is, " _the president of 13 said in a firm voice.

This only seemed to disrupt the girl more, and she stumbled back on her feet, Gale taking her by the arms to help her stand. Peeta couldn't quite recall Haymitch saying these words, but it seemed to calm Katniss down a little and he was thankful for that.

_" But we discussed about it earlier, this isn't a good idea, " _Katniss breathed out, pushing her best friend's hands away gently. _" Please, don't make me do this, " _she practically begged.  
Coin smiled, _" I'm sorry dear, the decision has been made. You will have to deal with that, " _she replied.  
_" It's not like I don't want to, I just… I-I just can't! " _Katniss cried out as she put her head in her hands.

She was weeping, Gale rubbing her back. These last words got stuck in the blond's mind, it confirmed his and Prim's theory. Snow definitely did something to her, because she apparently tried to fight the hostility and grudge she held against him.

Peeta cleared his throat. _" President, Katniss is right. Look at her, she can't afford to break down like that in the Capitol, " _he told the silver-haired woman. _" Can't a little change be possible for once? " _he asked.  
Coin rolled her eyes, _" I'm sorry, but you both have to act up and take care of that problem of yours. The decision of the squads were strategic, and we can't let one of you go in the first group, it would be too risky, " _she replied, throwing away Peeta's proposition.  
_" So now, that is risky? " _Peeta asked, unable to hide the anger in his voice. _" We'll be in danger anyway, and one of us will probably die, maybe both of us, " _he added.  
The president frowned, _" Are you insinuating that our plans are not good enough for your likes? " _she asked, her voice trembling slightly.  
_" You couldn't even try to rescue Katniss in that arena, but you can send us in the same squad to let us kill each other? " _Peeta asked, getting up. _" I can't quite comprehend you President. Who exactly are you protecting here? "_

Katniss stopped crying and looked up at Peeta. She had no idea about what he was talking about. The arena? Too risky? It confused her. The girl could've never imagine the boy to take her side on this subject. He was a total mystery for her, a dangerous and manipulative mystery. Katniss knew she couldn't trust a word coming out of his mouth, but was willing to stand by his side this one time. She got up, reassuring Gale with a smile and the guards with a nod.

_" Soldier Mellark, I told you, the squads" compositions won't be changed, " _Coin said.  
Katniss bit her bottom lip and walked towards Peeta, _" It's okay, I'm sorry. We'll go together, " _she stated, stopping next to the blond. _" I guess we'll work it out, " _she added.  
The president of the district let out a sigh, _" Then this reunion is over! See you tomorrow morning at 9! " _she shouted.

People started to leave the room, including the president. The blond was surprised by the turn of events, and could only look at Katniss in the corner of his eye. She was facing him totally, visibly muddled by her own words.

_" You didn't have to do that Katniss, " _the boy told her. _" I had a chance to succeed, " _he added, his gaze lowering to the brunette's lips for a second.  
She shook her head, _" As if, " _she replied. _" There was no other solution. "_

Peeta's heartbeat resonated in his head and blood pumped at his temples. This was the first time they had a normal conversation since they got her back. It felt eerie and he didn't want to get used to this kind of behavior coming from her.

_" Well, we'll never know, " _he sighed.  
Katniss stared at him not even blinking, _" Let's hope you won't get killed in your sleep lover boy, " _she said.

This sounded like a threat in the blond's ears, but he broke into a nervous laughter. The brunette curved a eyebrow and took a step back, but didn't do anything offensive. Peeta looked up at the ceiling as the laughter calmed down.

_" And you call me that? It sounds quite ridiculous now if you ask me, " _he sighed.  
The girl shrugged, _" I don't really know how to label you Mellark. So bear with that one, " _she answered. _" I'll get out of here before I change my mind about all of that, " _she added, heading towards the exit.

The blond's eyes watched her as she joined her best friend and linked their hands again. The pair disappeared from his sight and he let out a shaky sigh, relieved that she didn't get violent. Surely, Gale and Katniss got closer since her return, and they probably spent most of their time together, but it didn't matter to the blond. As long as she could find happiness and construct a new home once all of this was done, it was worth it. He could end up sad and alone that it wouldn't even bother him at this point. No matter how much he loved Katniss, no matter how much it hurt to see her and not being able to hold her in his arms, he could get over it, with time.

He was the last one in the Commandment Center, so he closed the door behind him. It was still early in the afternoon so he decided to take Prim's notebook and draw in the training center, wanting to avoid loneliness. Soldiers were running and fighting all around him, but it wasn't disturbing. On the opposite, he could look up from his book and escape the world that Katniss' little sister described with words. He realized with joy that he was done with the 74th Hunger Games part, and was now entering the part before the Victory Tour. Everything had been awkward between him and Katniss once he understood that she acted in the arena. He knew he had been self-centered but still couldn't bring himself to be happy about his situation. For sure he made it out alive, but what he thought was starting with the brunette was just a huge lie. As he looked at a man shooting with a bow, he wondered why he had cared so much about it, Katniss' acting and all.

" Katniss and Peeta saw each other again for the first time since the live interviews, and I feel this weird tension between them. Even thought they looked so close in the arena, now everything's gone. She's acting cold towards him but he manages to smile for the cameras. I think my sister is lost, now that she has to face Gale again. "

The blond took some time to read the whole page to decide what he would draw afterwards. Prim seemed to understand a lot of things, wiser than any child her age. She could depict every situation very easily and put it in sentences that explained all as if you were watching a movie.

" Gale just got whipped and I was surprised to hear that Peeta interfered between the new head peacekeeper and Katniss. He would still do anything to protect her, and I don't comprehend why my sister is being so convinced that he is manipulating her in some way. I think that if he protected and looked after Gale, it's because he knows how much he means to her. All I can see is caring and perhaps some feelings from Peeta. I wish Katniss could see it with my eyes, then maybe she could trust him just like she did in the arena. At this point, both of them are worrying about the other's behavior, but they shouldn't be. "

Peeta smiled, maybe Prim was right. Maybe both of them were too afraid to face the truth, too afraid to speak their minds. All he had left were "what ifs" that would lead nowhere, so he flipped the page and kept reading.

" Katniss broke her ankle, and it wasn't because of the snow. I might be young, but I'm not stupid. Peeta looked after her and left the house pretty late. I have no idea about what happened in that bedroom, but what I'm sure about is that Katniss needs this boy, and I can pretty much understand why. "

The blond chose to draw this exact thing, him sitting on a chair next to Katniss. He remembered carrying her up the stairs and laying her on the bed. When he moved to leave her alone, she took his hand and told him to stay until she fell asleep. Of course, he agreed to that, and when she asked him to stay with her, he answered always, but she was too far gone to hear anything.

The boy lost himself in the drawing, portraying Katniss' sleepy face after she took her medicine and her hand holding his. It didn't matter what she could think now, he did his best to support her and be there for her. Sadly, it didn't work entirely, she had been an hostage in the Capitol for far too long. It took him hours to render the artwork completely, and he was satisfied by his job once he finished. Looking at his blackened hands, he got to the bathroom with the book, to clean them, using an insane dose of soap.

He took the elevator and entered the canteen. Hopefully, Katniss' sister was alone at her table, so he sat next to her, sliding the book towards her.

_" Are you done already? " _she asked, excitement in her voice.  
Peeta shook his head, _" No, but I think you should give it to your sister after you've seen my drawings, " _he said.  
_" You're right. Your departure is closer every day, " _she breathed out, opening the book. _" I talked to my mom about Katniss. She couldn't get into the doctor's files, I'm sorry, " _she added, searching for new drawings.  
_" About that, I think our suspicions can be confirmed. They definitely did something to your sister, " _Peeta explained calmly, not willing to make the girl panic. _" She said that she couldn't be in my squad, not because she didn't want to, but because she couldn't. "  
_Prim looked away from the pages, _" But, that means there's nothing we can do, " _she winced. _" Except giving her my diary, " _she added.  
_" And that's more than enough. Thank you Prim, " _the blond said, smiling.

He looked around them, and patted the girl's head. She hugged him and let him go before her sister walked in the canteen. Peeta took his tray and sat at the table he shared with Annie and Finnick even thought they weren't there yet. He ate alone, but felt peaceful because at least he tried to make a change.

* * *

**NDA: Once again I'm late and I'm sorry!**

**From next chapter, I'll have a beta that will correct my mistakes**

**( I know there are plenty haha)**

**Thank you so much for reading me,**

**bisous. :)**


	32. Chapter 32 : You can't lose faith now

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 32: You can't lose faith now**

Peeta saw Katniss and Gale entering the canteen, and for the first time since she got in 13, he smiled at that vision. They looked perfectly fine together, and he didn't want to be selfish any longer. It moved him in an odd way, and he thought that he finally got the meaning of loving someone more than anything. He masticated his mashed potatoes lazily and before his stunned eyes, the two of them shared a passionate kiss. It was like something broke inside of him. Even if he had imagined them to be intimate, he wasn't ready to see that kind of thing this soon. Looking down at his plate, he made his fork twirl aimlessly, suddenly tired. He was glad the day was coming to its end, not willing to hold another conversation with anyone. Once his stomach felt filled, he threw his tray and left the cafeteria with his hands in the back pockets of his pants. He didn't have any schedule to erase from his wrist, it had been a long time since he had to, so he took a towel and his night clothes, then headed towards the bathrooms.

While the warm water dropped loudly on his back, he reviewed Katniss and Gale. He knew this would have happened if he died in the first arena, and tried to convince himself that it was better this way. He stepped out of his cabin, in his fresh pajama and brushed both his hair and teeth, staring at the lifeless reflexion of his own in the mirror. Never had he looked that exhausted before. Even thought his body looked weak, his mind was finding some rest at last. Finnick was with Annie, sharing precious moments before the next mission, Katniss found Gale again, and that was enough.

He entered his bedroom and sat in front of his small desk, collecting the few object he threw away before and never picked up. The boy wasn't feeling tired, his muscles sore but his mind wide awake, and he wished he had Prim's diary to make time go faster. It was too late to rent a book in the library, so he pulled out his military strategy's notebook and tried to memorize some of the most useful lessons he had been told since he got in the district. With all the recent events, all his classes had been canceled, so it wasn't full and after forty minutes, he was done. He relaxed in the chair and stared at the green ceiling, still not willing to get some sleep. He ripped some pages off the notebook and took the black pencil he had been given during his first lesson. Just as Prim did, he wrote about his feelings, starting from the last day in the arena of the Quarter Quell. Of course he could've written about all of his experience in the Games, but he didn't feel like it.

Close to midnight, he turned off the small lamp on his nightstand and stretched out, his back hurting from bending over the desk for hours. He slid his thin body under the covers and set his alarm clock on 8 because of the reunion in the morning.

He yawned and growled when the ringing started, but sat up anyway, his eyelids feeling heavy. When he got to the cafeteria, Finnick almost jumped on him.

_" Hey there! You seem in an incredible mood today, " _Peeta said, smiling.  
Finnick shook his friend in all directions, his eyes shining like diamonds, _" I'm getting married Peeta! I'm going to marry Annie! "_

Peeta stood motionless in front of his friend, his mouth hanging stupidly open as the information made its way towards his brain. His face broke into a huge smile and he hugged the taller blond, too happy to be formal.

_" Oh my god, when? " _he asked, setting his hands on the other blond's shoulders. _" When will it be? "  
_Finnick broke into another laughter, _" Tomorrow! And you're the one making the cake! " _he shouted, dragging people's attention on them.  
_" R-Really?! That's fantastic Finnick! " _Peeta yelled back.

After a couple minutes, Finnick let Peeta search his tray and sit next to him at their table. They discussed about the ceremony, and how President Coin was kind enough to let them have a little party afterwards. Peeta couldn't be happier and promised himself that he would make the most beautiful cake anyone had ever seen. They ate and Annie joined Finnick, pulling him in a tight hug, tears of joy rolling down her cheeks. Peeta smiled and finished his glass of milk, already thinking about the ingredients he would need for baking.

_" I guess you will have to work this afternoon buddy, " _Finnick said, smiling.  
Peeta shook his head slightly, _" Come on, baking is not working for me, I told you already, " _he replied.

Once they all finished their breakfasts, Finnick and Peeta left the cafeteria and took the elevator to get to the Commandment Center. They were the last one to arrive apparently, and they took the last two chairs available, next to Katniss and Gale.

_" Today, we'll talk about the Capitol with Mr Latier, " _Boggs stated, Coin visibly absent. _" Each soldier will have to anticipate his movements, because you could walk into a trap and lose a leg, or worse, your life " _he added. _" With the Holo, most of them will be visible and easily avoided, but there are new alterations that President Snow is still placing since the rescue. "  
_Beetee nodded and rolled forward, _" Every day I'm updating the Holo, but once you'll be gone, there will be no way for me to change your maps. Fortunately, through your earpieces, we'll communicate constantly. And this is why you mustn't mislay or break them. "  
__" The most important thing out there will be to communicate, all of us, " _Coin's secondhand insisted, staring at Katniss. _" If one of our teammates ends up on his own, there will be close to no chance for him to survive, " _he continued, a frown on his forehead. _" If one of us falls into a trap, President Snow will know about our presence in the Capitol, and it will make everything harder, " _he added. _" Which is why we will have to stay united and strong. "_

Peeta saw Katniss roll her eyes and Gale slapping her hand gently. He knew that she was still reluctant to be part of the same squad, but was sure she would get better with time. The blond couldn't forget how she agreed with him the past day and how they got to talk without any useless argument.

_" The journey through the Capitol should take less than a week if nothing bad occurs, " _Boggs stated. _" Beetee will now show you the ideal path, " _he added, taking a step back.  
The board slowly slid down from the ceiling and Boggs activated the projector, Beetee taking out some sort of a rod to point out things on it. A map of the Capitol appeared, and Peeta's eyes widened when he realized how long and difficult the mission would be. There was around 20 miles from the train station to Snow's palace if you didn't pay attention to the detours they had to take and the traps they had to avoid.  
_" As you all can see, the road isn't safe everywhere, so you'll have to make a detour to get to the president's residence, " _Beetee started. _" You'll be taking the streets where the less traps have been located by our software. Even with that, your life will be in danger constantly, " _he continued, sliding his rod on the panel. _" I made your ideal path pass through some rebel's houses, which will allow you to take shelter and sleep under a roof. Normally, you'll find one every two days. I'm afraid this was the best I could do. "  
_Katniss raised her hand, _" So you're saying that we'll have to sleep out in the open at least three nights? How are we not going to be detected? " _she asked.  
Beetee smiled, _" You'll find some blind alleys in which you'll set camp, " _he answered. _" Here look, there are a dozen of them in that part of the city, I'm sure the Holo will be able to lead you to one safely, " _he added.  
Katniss frowned, _" Isn't there a way for us to sleep in the sewers? " _she suggested. _" It might be wiser. "  
_Beetee considered her proposition for a moment, _" Katniss, the engineers and myself haven't been able to scan through the drains, and there's a possibility that there are traps in those as well. "  
_Peeta cleared his throat, _" We won't be moving in them, we'll just sleep. I think this is a good option if we can't reach a shelter before night fall, " _he said, supporting the girl. _" It will be safer than a dead-end street. "_

They kept arguing about that topic, but Peeta stopped voicing his opinion. He knew that Beetee wouldn't be there with them, and that they would choose being in the drains than out in the open anytime.

_" Each of these allies' shelter will provide you with munitions or food, sometimes both. These people are risking their life for our fight, and they're as important as you are, so be discreet once you're under their roofs, " _Boggs said, changing the subject. _" We'll be exposed enough with our weapons, but we'll get to borrow some Capitol's clothes. Beetee will show where the shop is located, " _he added.  
The man pointed to a shelter, _" This one here, the lady will let you in, but try to get there before 8 AM, otherwise, you'll cross the road of Capitol people, and they'll recognize you in no time. Especially Peeta, Finnick and Katniss. "_

They shared a look, but when Katniss' gaze met Peeta's, she quickly looked away, whispering something into her best friend's ear. The blond didn't want to know what it was about. She could be planning a way to get rid of him for all he knew.

_" The last part of your route will be the hardest, because a lot of citizen walk around in there, " _Beetee explained. _" Basically, until you reach the shop, you'll mostly be alone as the part of the city as been deserted on Snow's order. He's using a huge rim of the Capitol as an armed shelter, " _he continued. _" If nobody finds out you're in the rim, he won't bother putting a lot of peacekeepers next to the shop area. And once you'll be disguised, you'll be vulnerable but able to hide, " _he added. _" A few traps are settled close to his residence, but they're not activated usually because of the citizen. You'll have to do anything you can to keep their alerts down. "_

A lot of informations just came in, and Peeta knew he would have to write them down once the reunion was over.

Boggs clapped his hands together, _" As you heard, discretion will be our most important tool in the Capitol, and if nothing goes out of hand, we won't have to use our weapons until we reach President Snow's residence, " _he repeated to make things clear. _" Now, Mr Latier will tell some of you about their weapon. "_

Beetee nodded, and the Commandment Center's doors opened, assistants bearing heavy boxes in their arms. They opened them, and a blond boy unwrapped a huge bow.

_" Katniss, this is a very special bow, and of course, special arrows, " _he started, unable to hide his childish smile. _" It will only react to your voice, and the string won't soften until you've waken it. I'll show you how it all works after this meeting. "_

The brunette was on the edge of her chair, staring down at the black bow. She was smiling widely, from ear to ear, and Peeta felt his heart flutter. Seeing this girl happy was the most precious thing in the world to him. The assistant left the Center and another one unwrapped two crossbows.

_" Gale, Peeta, these are your crossbows. They're protected with the same system as Katniss' bow. The arrows are also equally special. You'll also be able to learn more about it afterwards, " _Beetee announced.

Then, a girl unwrapped the biggest package, and before his eyes, Peeta saw the most beautiful trident he's ever seen. The handle was thin but looked strong, and the black of it seemed to glow slightly under the room's light. The pikes were as sharp as they could be, and Finnick squealed on his right. The engineers packed the weapons and put them back in their boxes.

_" I'm sorry there's nothing special about this Finnick, but I'm sure you'll make good use of it, " _Beetee said. The engineer thanked the assistants, and turned back to the soldiers in front of him, _" Going back to the Capitol topic, I'm inviting you to ask any question to Paylor, Boggs or myself before the departure in three days. Not a single detail or a single hesitation can be left out regarding the mission, " _he stated. _" Thank you all for coming, Coin will surely see you tomorrow. "_

The man gestured to Finnick, Peeta, Katniss and Gale and they followed him out of the Center. Beetee pushed his wheelchair towards an elevator, and they entered it silently. All of them were excited about their weapons, but Peeta felt sad, he didn't want to use that crossbow. He wished they could cross the Capitol without any mishap. The assistants were in the Training Center, each of them holding a weapon in hand. Beetee let the soldiers handle their owns, Finnick excusing himself and leaving them to train on his own.

_" To allow your string to soften, you'll just have to talk, it will recognize your voice, " _Beetee explained. _" And a simple 'good night', will turn it off, " _he added. _" You'll notice that your arrows' handles bear different colors, and you'd better remember what I'll say very quickly, " _he continued. _" Red shaft is explosive, yellow incendiary and green sharp-edged, " _he told them.

The engineer thought about everything, and gave little cardboards to each of them, with quick instructions written on it. He rolled towards the shooting stand and told the soldiers to try the cutting arrows, not willing to destroy the hangar with the two other types.

_" I almost forgot. You can stop any arrow with the simple sound of your voice, " _he explained.  
Katniss curved an eyebrow, _" Do you think we really need that? " _she asked, unconvinced. _" When could we use that ability? "  
_Beetee pushed his glasses up his nose, _" You'll be surprised, but I'm sure it will be useful. "_

The bow started to tremble lightly in the girl's hand, and she pulled it to her face, the vibration traveling through the bones of her skull. She eyed Beetee, not understanding this aspect.

_" Why is it shaking? " _she asked, pushing the bow away from her face. _" Is there a problem? "  
_The man smiled, _" No, it's saying hello to you, " _he told her. _" It should stop any moment now. "_

Peeta mumbled words and his crossbow started to tremble as well, and after five seconds, it stopped. He took it and armed it, put a sharp-edged arrow in it, then aimed and pushed the trigger. Before his stunned eyes, the entire arrow pierced through the target, hitting the bulletproof wall noisily. Katniss was too fascinated by her bow to realize she was in the training center with Peeta, and started shooting by his side. The three of them exercised for half an hour, then collected the special arrows, putting them back in their quivers.

_" I'm sorry, but you'll have to train with regular arrows in here, " _Beetee sighed. _" Coin forbids the use of mine in the center. "  
_

They gave their quivers back, but kept their bows. Katniss sat down and ran a hand over her forehead, Gale taking place next to her. They started discussing about their weapons, and Peeta decided to leave them alone, joining Finnick a few meters away.

_" Good night, " _he whispered to his crossbow. _" Hi buddy, how is your trident? "  
_The blond smiled, getting off the training carpet, _" It's fantastic Peeta! It's light and easy to handle, I've never seen anything like it, " _he replied, visibly satisfied. _" No matter how sweaty my hands get, it never slips, it's marvelous! "_

Peeta saw Beetee talking with Katniss and Gale, the girl giving a nod and following the man towards the exit, her best friend still sitting. He wondered what the man had to show her in private, and imagined it was related to her being the mockingjay. Gale joined Peeta and Finnick.

_" Beetee did a fantastic job once again, " _Gale said, caressing the material of his crossbow. _" I wonder what he has to do with Katniss though, " _he added.  
Finnick smiled, _" Don't worry, it must have something to do with her status. Perhaps Coin wants to film her. "  
_Gale shook his head slowly, _" He said Cinna left something for her, so it has nothing to do with the President, " _he replied.

A knot formed in the smaller blond's stomach being reminded of Cinna. He had no news about him, and didn't get a chance to ask Katniss about it since they couldn't get along. Last time he saw him was during the last interview before the Quarter Quell, when he saw Katniss' wedding dress turn into a mockingjay. The boy wasn't stupid, he knew the stylist got in trouble for that, and that made him fear about his safety.

_" This man was incredible, " _Gale sighed. _" He always believed in her, from the very beginning. "_

With these simple words, Peeta understood that Cinna wasn't alive anymore, and he bit the inside of his cheeks. He wasn't close to him, not like Katniss was, but it still made one more person he appreciated dead. The stylist was clever, and he dared to make that alternation because he knew it was worth his life. Cinna committed suicide, even thought Snow killed him.

_" I don't know if you want to train, but I'm going back to my room, " _Peeta said, getting up.  
Finnick smiled, _" You told me I could come anytime didn't you? " _he asked.  
_" Of course, follow me then, " _the blond replied.

Gale told them he wanted to say a little bit longer, so they left without him. They got into the smaller boy's room, setting their weapons down near the entrance, then sat on the bed.

_" I never thought they'd allow us to keep them out of the training center, " _Finnick said. _" We could lose our minds and kill everybody for all I know, " _he uttered in a sigh.  
_" You're right, that's strange, " _Peeta agreed. _" But I'm not going to walk around with it anyway. "_

Peeta pulled out a notebook and wrote the major informations about the Capitol mission, Finnick copying silently on some teared up pages by his side. They argued about the attitude they'd have to have in the Capitol. Once the subject was drained out, the older one started to talk about Annie, and Peeta listened carefully, a slight smile at the corner of his mouth.

_" I can't believe I'll be married tomorrow, " _Finnick breathed out, running a hand in his curly hair. _" Annie's so happy, she can't stop crying every time she sees me, " _he added, laughing. _" I know she's scared I won't make it back, and I try to comfort her. But who knows, she could be right, a lot of us won't survive. "  
_Peeta lowered his gaze, _" We're not dead yet, and there was a time we thought we'd be, so hope is still here, " _he reassured his friend, patting his back. _" You have to enjoy your time in 13, then we'll see. "  
_Finnick looked up, his eyes full of apprehension, _" I'm already doing that, but I can't help worrying. "  
__" It will be fine. We'll be in there together, as usual, " _Peeta answered, smiling.

They lied down next to each other on Peeta's small bed, staring at the green ceiling. For a while, they didn't exchange a word, both lost in their thoughts. Then Finnick rolled on his side and got up on his elbow, resting his chin in the palm of his hand.

_" What about you Peeta? " _he asked his friend.  
Peeta lifted his eyebrows, _" What about me? I'm fine I suppose, " _he stated.  
_" Well, I've seen how close Gale and Katniss can get, and I know it must be hard on you, " _Finnick started. _" And I can never guess what you're thinking, you're face's always so composed. "  
_The smaller boy laughed silently, _" She can finally settle down with someone she loves and that loves her back whole heartedly. I think the situation isn't that bad after all. "_

Finnick rolled his eyes and sighed. He pinched Peeta's nose, making the blond sit up and look down at him.

_" What was that for? " _Peeta asked, his eyes wide open.  
Finnick stared back, not amused, _" You're lying again buddy. It's me, so you can spit it all out, " _he said as an explanation.  
_" No but really, I'm fine, I promise. Today is one of the best day I've ever had so far, " _the smaller boy sighed. _" Of course I didn't suddenly become emotionless, it still hurts, but I can live with that pain. "  
__" I already told you this, but allow yourself to be selfish Peeta. Nobody can do that in your place, " _Finnick said.  
Peeta laid back down on the bed, _" I can't afford to do this. I will not destroy her happiness, she's fine without me, " _he replied. _" If it means that I have to walk out of her life, I'll do it. "  
__" She agreed to be in your squad Peeta, even if she wanted you dead before, " _Finnick told his friend.  
Peeta laughed, _" Yeah, and we had a four sentences long conversation afterwards. She told me that I should hope not to be killed in my sleep, " _he replied.  
_" Seriously? I didn't know that! " _Finnick almost yelled. _" Did she say something else? "  
_Peeta pouted, _" She called me lover boy. I never thought someone would do that again, " _he answered, turning his head to face the other blond. _" I think she associates this nickname to the whole acting thing going on during the 74th Hunger Games, " _he added. _" Which means she really can't trust me. "_

Finnick closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, then fell on his back again, their shoulders brushing because of the narrowness of the mattress they were on. He wanted to comfort his friend, but he also refused to lie. There was no way to know if Katniss' aggressiveness would lessen with time.

_" She took a step in your way Peeta, that's a good place to start, " _Finnick said, unsure about his own words.  
His friend smiled, _" It was the first time she didn't yell at me since we got her back, " _he breathed out.

He remembered the Quarter Quell, how Katniss was worried about him and looking after him constantly. It wasn't just about the kiss they shared on the beach, but also when he hit the forcefield or fought against another tribute in the water. He could still see the fear in the girl's eyes every time she thought he was about to die. Peeta was convinced she wasn't faking it, and that she really cared about him, and he wished he could have appreciated these little gestures a bit more.

_" I know she made some progress, but now that she's with Gale, I must let her go, " _Peeta said, his voice firm and determined. _" I am willing to let her go. "_

Finnick didn't answer, unable to find the words that would make the boy feel better. Peeta sounded resigned, sure that things weren't going to improve between him and Katniss. His friend wasn't feeling like giving up, and didn't want Peeta to do so. The relationship they had couldn't be doomed, he knew Peeta could find a way to improve it somehow. The older boy sighed, it was not the time to tell his friend that, he wouldn't listen.

_" With time, a lot of things can change, " _Finnick whispered. _" You can't lose faith now. "_

He got up and saluted his friend, then retrieved his trident. He walked away, turned on his heels and waved, then closed the door behind him, Peeta still lying on his bed. The blond knew he was being pessimistic, but it was better than setting his hopes too high and fall from the height afterwards. He felt stupid, basing his whole life upon a single human being, but it wasn't like he could change that. The other sides of his existence weren't bright either, souled and torn by the Hunger Games, by Snow. With all of that, it was easier to care about a girl than about a revolution, even if it wasn't less painful.  
Peeta didn't have anything to do until lunch, so he stopped by the library and read the first Lord of the Rings books. Two hours later, he memorized the page where he stopped then left to get to the cafeteria. Finnick was with Annie, and they looked happier than ever. This made a warm sensation rise in the boy's chest. He took his tray and joined them.

_" Thank you for baking our cake, " _Annie said, taking one of Peeta's hand in hers. _" Thank you very much. "  
_The blond smiled, _" You're welcome. I promise it will look and taste amazing, " _he replied.  
Annie nodded, _" I'm sure it will be Peeta_. "

The boy asked them about what their preferences were, not willing to bake a cake the groom and bride wouldn't eat. Finnick and Annie assured him that they weren't difficult and would gladly accept anything. Peeta laughed and told them that he had to pick a flavor, and that it would be better if it suited their tastes. The conversation went on, and the smaller blond ate his corn, carefully listening to the couple's ideas about the theme of the party.

While his friends kept talking about the subject, a guard showed up at their table and asked for him, so he nodded, leaving his tray on the table. The man leaded him into a part of the District he never saw before, but Peeta smiled when he saw the "Kitchen" sign hanging over swing doors. The guard and himself slipped through the cooks until they reached an area that was purposely empty.

_" Soldier Mellark, you can dispose of any tool or ingredient you need to bake Soldier Odair and Miss Cresta's wedding cake. You can stay as long as necessary, " _the guard said. _" Any cook can help you as well. "  
_The blond nodded, _" How many people will eat that cake? "  
_The guard curved an eyebrow, _" I ignore that information, just make it big. "_

Peeta thanked the man and looked around him. First of all, he needed flour and sugar, along with a dozen of eggs. He opened a huge fridge and pulled out all the ingredients, then put them on a counter. Once it was done, he washed his hands and searched for a big bowl, opening drawers and closets. He found it, a whip and a ladle. He prepared batter in an awful quantity, enough to make the cake three stories high. It was amazing for him to be able to cook again, and he whipped the pastry as hard as he could, his arm hurting. He let it rest and crossed an hand over his sweaty forehead.

_" Okay, now the frosting, " _he told himself, opening the fridge again.

He took three eggs, some vanilla extract, powdered sugar and salt. He mixed the white of the eggs with the vanilla in a new bowl, then added a spoon of salt. He then kept mixing while adding small amounts of powdered sugar. All he had to do was wait for it to frost. The blond took some time to sit down, pondering about how the icing should look like. Both Finnick and Annie were from District 4, so he settled his mind on a sea themed cake. He knew he would have to tell Coin about it so she could decorate a room, but focused on the decoration he would add. Searching through the drawers, he found a brush and some food coloring, along with red currant. He looked for a piece of paper and a pen, finding both of them in a tiny closet, and started to draw the cake, in order to visualize it.

_" I hope they'll like it, " _he whispered to himself, staring at his sketch.

He pulled out some baking pans of three different sizes and poured the heavy batter in them. Warming up the oven, he checked the frosting, which was almost ready, and put the batters in the oven. Hopefully, the recipe he used for them needed only 25 minutes of baking. He found some almond paste and moulded some dolphins, crabs and fishes, then took the time to color them properly. Once satisfied, he removed the batters from the oven and let them cool off a bit. He prepared some pastry cream, and colored it in light blue. Peeta pulled up his sleeves and started covering the batters in frosting, carefully applying the white substance equally over the pastry. He let it settle and drew waves with the blue cream he did earlier, trying his hardest to make it neat. He assembled the stories of batter and put some red currant on each of them, then settled down his dolphins, crabs and fishes.

_" It looks just fine, " _he mumbled, staring at the giant cake.

He carried the heavy wedding pastry and secured it in the fridge, then closed the door. He let out a happy sigh and cleaned his hands. The blond walked out of the kitchen and told a cook that the cake was done, and that nobody was allowed in the room until the wedding. The man nodded and Peeta exited the kitchens then took the elevator to get to the bathrooms and take a piss. When he saw himself in a mirror, he laughed and washed his face, covered in flour and sugar.

It was still early in the afternoon, and the blond wanted to draw, but wasn't in possession of Prim's notebook any longer. He decided to check the training center, to look at some fights. Perhaps the camouflage stand would be open. He took the stairs to get there, and recognized a familiar voice when he entered the stairwell. Apparently, Haymitch was talking to himself. He climbed down until he reached his ex-mentor, slouched and obviously drunk.

_" Are you alright? " _he asked, helping the man sitting up.  
His ex-mentor growled and slumped against the wall, _" Never been better! " _he replied, nodding.  
_" You don't look so fine, " _Peeta insisted, squatting in front of him. _" Is it your first bottle? " _he asked, pointing to the recipient in the man's hand.  
Haymitch raised his eyebrows, _" Of course not, this lady is my third, and she's better than the two others, " _he stated.

The man seemed to find his own sentence very funny and bursted into a terrible laughter, some liquor dropping on the ground as his hand shook with the rest of his body. Peeta rolled his eyes and helped him in the process of holding his bottle, making Haymitch push him back.

_" Hey, hey, it's okay, I'm not going to steal it, " _Peeta said, throwing his arms up.  
Haymitch eyed him seriously, _" Oh but, you can have some too boy, " _he answered, shaking his head. _" You'll see, everything seems better afterwards! "_

Peeta contemplated this option. He had nothing scheduled until nightfall and nothing better to do, so he sat in front of his ex-mentor and nodded.

_" Sure, I'll drink with you, " _he said.  
Haymitch handed him the bottle, _" Ah, that's my boy! "_

The blond saw the bright side; at least Haymitch would have less liquor for himself and wouldn't be hungover the next day. It was a win-win situation, sort of. He took a sip of the beverage and coughed, his throat burning.

_" Seriously, " _he started, his voice broke. _" Ho-How can you drink that thing everyday? " _he asked, not really waiting for an answer.  
His ex-mentor laughed, _" Because it tastes better with time, you'll see, " _he answered.

Peeta coughed again but swallowed another sip of liquor. He shook his head, disliking the aftertaste in his mouth and gave the bottle back. Sighing, he closed his eyes, realized his head was spinning, and opened them again. So that was what alcohol did to people. He couldn't quite understand those drunkards, except Haymitch of course. There wasn't a single pleasurable thing about drinking, not the taste, not the feeling, not the result.

_" Well, I should've warned you, but this is some hard shit you drank here, " _Haymitch said, pointing at the bottle. _" The cooks finally accepted to give some of it to my poor self, " _he added. _" I tell ya', this is the best beverage I've had in a while! "  
_Peeta pinched his lips and stretched his legs out, _" I don't even want to know what the other liquors taste like then, " _he stated.

Haymitch laughed again, his hands holding his belly as Peeta watched him. The boy's face broke into a smile and he took the bottle, drank two sips and put it down next to him. Maybe this could take his mind off Katniss for a couple hours.

_" How do you do it Haymitch? " _he heard himself ask. _" I mean, how do you live? "_

The man's eyes widened. He took the bottle and stared at it for a while.

_" To be honest with you Peeta, I'm just holding on, " _he answered before taking a sip. _" I'm drinking because it helps me going on. "  
__" I'm sorry, " _the blond uttered in a sigh, staring at his feet.

**NDA: Hey guys, here's the 32nd chapter!**

**A lot of things happened, especially on Peeta's side.**

**I'm late because I waited for a correction, but it's already been two weeks,**

**so I decided to post it with mistakes in it.**

**See you in the next chapter!**

**bisous :)**


	33. Chapter 33 : You are strong

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 33 : You are strong**

Peeta lost sense of time after he drank half of the liquor that remained when he joined Haymitch. He felt extremely heavy, from head to toes, and he had the impression that his brain was too big for his own skull. His leg was sore from sitting, but he did nothing to stop the tingling, too lazy and exhausted physically.

Haymitch burped and slapped the thigh of his fake leg, _" So, Peeta! Tell me! " _he claimed, his voice revolving in the staircase.  
The blond curved an eyebrow, his mouth furred, _" Hm? Tell you what? "  
__" How're you feeling? Are you relaxed yet? " _his ex-mentor asked, scratching his beard.

These two questions made the boy freeze for a while. Well, he was feeling as if he was drowning in alcohol, but his mind was clearer than before, free from all the insecurities and troubles he always had to deal with. He couldn't exactly qualify this sensation as relaxing, but it sure was easier.

_" I dunno… " _he mumbled, shrugging. _" It feels empty, yet it's full. "  
_Haymitch's eyes widened, and he looked up for a while, _" Sorry Peeta but, " _he made a pause, lowering his gaze. _" I don't understand… " _he blurted out, his eyes squinting slightly.  
_" My mind's blank, " _Peeta explained, a finger pointing at his forehead. _" But my body's full, " _he added, his index now pointing at his stomach.

The older man broke into a terrible laughter, and the boy joined him, unable to stop. He realized how slow the connection between his brain and his eyes was when he turned his head around. It only made him laugh harder and slide down the wall until he ended up lying on his back.

_" Well, I guess you're just fine! " _his ex-mentor stated.

Peeta didn't feel the need to add anything, but he managed to sit up, his body still shaken by a soft giggling. He looked down at his bracelet, in order to know what time it was, but the numbers seemed to dance and jump before his eyes. The white symbols were moving so fast it made his stomach twist and nausea hit his system. After all, it didn't really matter, because he had nothing planned, and because he was way too dizzy to actually do anything. He looked up, his vision blurry, his guts feeling as if they were upside down, and he growled, putting a hand on his belly.

_" Trust me, I've been better, " _he said, gritting his teeth.  
Haymitch's face decomposed, _" You're feeling sick boy? " _he asked, genuine concern in his hoarse voice.  
_" It's just- ! So uncomfortable, " _the boy tried to explain, shuddering around. _" Something doesn't feel right… Something changed. "  
__" Ah, hum… " _his ex-mentor stammered. _" Lost ya again kid, " _he admitted, shaking his head.

Peeta himself wouldn't have been able to explain what he was feeling. He didn't have to focus on his current preoccupations in 13 because he was too busy fighting the liquor inside of his body. The only thing he could do was praying not to throw up, and it was already a lot for his alcohol-soused mind. Haymitch was staring at him, his eyebrows raised high on his wrinkled forehead, obviously waiting for an explanation.

_" Doesn't really matter anyway, " _the boy faltered, patting his ex-mentor's forearm awkwardly.  
Haymitch's eyes got even wider than before, then fell half-closed, _" If you say so… I'm kinda hungry now. "_

Just thinking about food made Peeta's liver tense painfully, and he almost threw up his lunch. He felt as if a bar was sinking in his belly, right below his ribs, pressuring his whole digestive system. It got harder for him to breathe, his lungs almost retracting on themselves, making it tougher for air to pass through his throat. Everything seemed to be crushing him down, to force him on the cold floor of the staircase, making his skin damp and sticky.

_" Hey, hey, it's okay, " _Haymitch murmured.

A hand rubbed the boy's back as his eyes shut tightly, He swore that it was the first and last time he drank alcohol in his entire existence. Even though the blankness of mind that happened while soused was enjoyable, it didn't last long enough and what followed was not worth it. He would have to find another way to get away from his thoughts, from his ghosts. They followed him even in his sleep, not letting him rest at night, and were always present during the day. There was no way to get rid of these memories, of these fears, he had no control over it. Perhaps he would just have to learn how to deal with it, he could even get better at it with a lot of time and patience. Anyway it was a better option than getting drunk.

_" I think I should go back to my room, " _Peeta uttered in a muffled voice.  
His ex-mentor huffed a laugh, _" And you want to walk there? " _he asked as if it was the stupidest idea ever.  
_" Well… Yeah, " _the blond answered, nodding slightly.

He held the metallic bar in front of him and pulled on his tired arms to find a standing position, but ended up squatting, his stomach aching. He held his breath for a few seconds and exhaled longly, his eyes tightly shut, and forced on his ankle, staggering, but with his ass off the floor. Haymitch gave him a thumb up, and groaned when he attempted to drink more, the liquor completely gone.

_" By any chance, would you be nice enough to bring me another bottle of that? " _he asked, pointing at the empty bottle.  
Peeta shook his head, _" I don't know where to find this, " _he replied. _" And I don't think I'll leave my room before dinner. "  
__" Damn… " _Haymitch sighed. _" At least I tried! " _he chanted, shrugging.

The boy bowed his head and started climbing the stairs, his foot unsteady, his head aching and turning. He somehow managed to get to his level and stumbled towards his room, needing three attempts to open his door. Once he got secluded, he dropped on his tiny mattress, yawned and rolled on his side. His vision was out of control, but he forced his eyes to focus on his tiny alarm clock to check the hour. It was 5:39, so he let himself fall asleep, wishing the fog and blurriness of alcohol would disappear by the time he'd wake up.

When he opened his eyes again, he let a groan leave his thick throat, a loud pumping hitting his temples. He ran a hand over his forehead, sighing, a heartburn starting to root in his stomach. The blond sat, putting his feet on the floor, and got up, exiting his bed room on a shaky leg, limping. He needed to see Prim and borrow some kind of remedy that could lessen the pain that seemed to extend to every inch of his tired body. Katniss could be there, it didn't even bothered him, he was feeling too sick to care about that. He gave the door two knocks, and it was her mother than opened it.

_" Oh, Peeta, what brings you here? " _she asked, letting him in. _" Is something wrong? "_

The boy looked around him and noticed that Katniss was napping, her hair undone and spread over her pillow. It made his heart sink as he thought about those nights they shared in the same bed, wrapped in each other. She turned on her back, her eyes fluttering open, and the blond took a cautious step back.

_" Peeta? " _the blond women repeated, her eyebrows furrowed in concern.  
He shook his head, _" A-Ah, sorry, " _he stuttered. _" I wanted to see Primrose, I need some medicine, " _he explained, a little embarrassed.  
_" Oh, I can find that for you, she's still in class, " _Katniss' mother replied, smiling. _" What exactly do you need? "  
_The boy lowered his gaze, _" I drank some of Haymitch's liquor, " _he admitted. _" And now I highly regret it. "  
_Katniss' mother giggled and nodded, _" Don't worry, I've got you, " _she reassured him, walking towards a small cupboard. _" Mr Abernathy comes by at least once every week for that, " _she stated, opening a drawer. _" So we always have something in here. "_

She searched in the drawer, bottles clinking, and Peeta forced his eyes on her. Katniss moaned and lowered her covers, and the blond swallowed with difficulty as she stood up and walked towards him.

_" What are you doing here lover boy? " _she asked, the strap of her shirt sliding down her shoulder. _" Need something? "_ she added, rubbing her sleepy eyes.  
The boy nodded, _" Yeah, Haymitch talked me into drinking, " _he answered.

The beating of his heart accelerated when she pulled on her strap to put it back in place. He realized he was staring and looked up at her, meeting her hollow gaze. She didn't seem angry, didn't look annoyed but rather expressionless, dark circles below her eyes.

_" I did that too, " _Katniss stated, watching her mother pull a couple of flasks out their cupboard. _" Once. "_

Peeta didn't remember hearing a thing about that, but he supposed it happened between their two Hunger Games participations.

_" Ah, hum… I see, " _he mumbled, taking the tiny bottles the brunette's mother was handing him. _" You are amazing. "  
_The blonde woman smiled, _" Take the green one right now, the second one after diner, " _she explained. _" If you're not better tomorrow, find me here around 9 in the morning, I'll give you some more. "  
__" Thank you very much, " _he said, bowing his head, pivoting on his heels.  
She hold up a hand and pulled a compress out of another drawer, _" Put that on your forehead, it should lessen your headache. "  
_Peeta took the tissue and bowed his head, _" I'll be going now. "_

Katniss' mom walked behind him until they reached the door, and before the boy got a chance to put his hand on the handle, it turned, Gale appearing in front of him. It shouldn't have been surprising for him to be there, Katniss and him being very close, but Peeta froze immediately.

_" Peeta? Why are you in here? " _he asked, frowning, his gaze going from the blond to the girl. _" Is something wrong? "  
_The boy shook his head, _" Nah, everything's fine, I'm just hungover, " _he reassured him, taking a step to the side to let him in. _" I guess I'll see you tomorrow at the wedding. "  
_Katniss' eyes widened and she put a hand on his shoulder, preventing him from leaving _" What? A wedding?! " _she squealed.

The place where her palm connected to his body seemed to burn, and Peeta's mouth opened and closed repeatedly. All he could manage to do was gasp as Katniss' grip tightened around his shoulder. It had been months since they got any physical contact, and he wasn't able to move. Secretly and selfishly, he was glad his body decided to be stubborn.

Gale sighed, _" Yes, Finnick and Annie got Coin's authorization to get married, " _he explained, giving the girl's mother a kiss on the cheek.  
_" Nobody told me about that… " _Katniss breathed out. _" Why? Am I not invited? "  
__" Don't be silly, " _Peeta blurted out, rolling his eyes exaggeratively. _" Of course you are. "_

Her eyes twitched, her mouth trembled, and her fingers dug further in the boy's shoulder, as if she needed something to hold onto. The blond gave her a slight smile and put a hand on top of hers, Katniss jolting at the contact. He realized what he did, but nothing he imagined the girl would do happened. She simply stared at their hands, her chest moving along her laborious breathing.

_" Goodnight Katniss, " _Peeta whispered.

Her hand slid down his chest as he took a step back, and he did his best to stay composed. He waved vaguely then walked out of the bedroom. He closed the door behind him, his hand stuck on the doorknob. Perhaps it was the booze that gave him the strength to try such a move. His composure fell all at once, and he let out a nervous laughter, still standing in front of the door. A guard gave him a weird look so he walked away, opening the green flask and drinking its content. It was a relatively thick liquid, with some herbs and spice, and it tasted like honey. He checked the time on his bracelet and limped towards the elevator to get to the cafeteria.

When he got there, Finnick and Annie were absent, but he took his tray, finding soup and a small piece of bread for diner. It wasn't like he was really hungry anyway, his stomach still hurting. He drank his bowl slowly, munching some pieces of bread lazily. Katniss and Gale walked in the canteen, and he couldn't look away from the girl, not after what happened in her room. This simple thing probably meant nothing for her, but to him it was a huge progress since they got to talk normally. There was a tiny chance they could learn to get along. It didn't take him long to finish his meal, so he threw his tray and walked away. As he made his way, he noticed Primrose getting out of the elevator, so he joined her.

_" Hi there, " _he said, smiling.  
She took his hand in hers and squeezed it, _" Peeta, I saw your drawings, they're amazing, " _she told him, her voice giggly. _" I am giving Katniss the book right after diner. "  
_The blond's eyes widened slightly, _" Thank you, " _he breathed out, squeezing her hand back.  
_" I hope it will help with your situation, " _the girl sighed.

Peeta nodded, at least it couldn't make things worse. It would possibly disturb Katniss, but that would also make her question her opinion about him, hopefully in a good way.

_" I stopped by your room earlier, " _the blond explained. _" I was originally looking for you. "  
_Primrose curved an eyebrow, _" Did you need anything? "  
__" Your mother gave it to me, don't worry, " _he replied, smiling.

He remembered about the second flask of medicine, and opened it, swallowing the liquid. This one was sweeter, tasting like vanilla. Katniss' little sister took the empty bottle and put it to her nose, smelling it.

_" This is what we prepare for Haymitch, " _she stated. _" Have you been drinking? "  
_Peeta pinched his lips, _" I have to say yes, but I wish I hadn't, " _he retorted.  
_" I remember Katniss drank once, she was in bad shape afterwards, " _Prim sighed.  
The boy let go of her hand, _" You should go, your soup will get cold, " _he told the girl.

She nodded and he entered the elevator as she walked towards her table. The boy took a shower and headed to bed, thinking about Finnick's wedding the next day, about how Katniss didn't reject his touch. He put Katniss' mother compress on his forehead, a soft smell of camomile coming from it. He sighed, and imagined the girl reading her sister's diary, looking at his drawings, and it made his heart lighter. She probably wouldn't even think it could be his artworks in there, but he hoped she would appreciate them. He fell asleep pretty fast, exhausted by his day.

His eyes opened wide and he sat up, his night clothes soaked in sweat, the rhythm of his heart numb. A nightmare, it had been a week or so since he didn't have one. This one had been particularly violent, involving his own death. He could almost feel Katniss' hands around his throat, almost see her crying, pain and hurt in her grey eyes. Exhaling through his mouth, he pushed the covers of his bed away, his hands shaking nervously. Slowly, he stood up and grabbed another pajama and a towel, then left his room. It was ten past three in the morning, and the corridors were only lit with emergency lights. He stumbled through them, heading to the bathrooms. Surprisingly, there was water noises coming from them.

_" Just breathe, it's gonna be okay, " _a male voice stated, echoing against the walls. _" You'll be fine, you're with me. "_

Peeta was too tired to wonder about what was happening, and he walked past the sinks, avoiding his reflection. He settled his towel on top of a shower's door and opened it, sliding inside and getting undressed. There was someone crying for sure, and it was most likely a woman.

_" Hey, hey, look at me, " _the male voice said. _" You are fine, I swear. "  
_The other person moaned, _" Just go! Please, go! "  
__" I won't leave you, " _was the man's answer. _" Not when you're like that. "  
__" I told you to go! " _the woman yelled.

Peeta heard a door screeching and footsteps getting closer to his location. He turned the faucet and water dropped on his tensed up shoulders, along his back and chest. Whoever that woman was, she didn't sound alright. Taking some soap, he started cleaning up, already wishing he could be back in bed. Once he was dressed again, he exited his cabin and stopped in front of a sink, sighing at the vision of his face. He heard a cry, and understood the person was still in here, alone.

_" Are you going to be okay? " _he asked, pulling out his hairbrush.

Nobody answered him, but a door opened somewhere. He looked on his left, and stopped moving as Katniss walked towards him, her eyes red and swollen. She didn't say anything and stood next to him, so close he could feel her breath on his bare arm.

_" Nightmare? " _the blond asked, his voice barely audible.

The brunette gave a nod, a few tears crawling down her cheeks. Peeta knew she got them very often, and that she had never been good at handling them. They always seemed to root inside of her mind, and whatever Snow did to her did not change that. She looked up at him, her bottom lip trembling, and grabbed his arm, nails digging in the skin.

_" I got one too, " _he breathed out, still not moving.

Her eyes widened slightly and she took a tiny step closer, her feet hitting his. The boy didn't know what to do as he stood there, staring at the brunette. Of course he wanted to help her, but wasn't willing to force her into something she wouldn't like or would regret later.

_" I… " _she whispered, her voice breaking. _" I saw your drawings in my sister's book. "_

Peeta's mouth opened and closed repeatedly, but he said nothing, not knowing which words to use. Katniss dropped her hand, lowering her head, and sniffed loudly. He hated to see her like that, he hated the fact that he had to wonder if he should comfort her with a hug or not.

_" Thank you, " _she added in a breath. _" For doing it. "_

She took a step back and walked away from him, Peeta reaching for her wrist and grabbing it. The girl turned on her heels to face him, and the boy held his breath for a few seconds, thinking about his next words.

_" You are strong, " _he told her. _" It will get better. "_

He freed her hand, but she didn't make a move and kept looking at him. She shook her head slightly and bit her lip. Peeta felt his heart tighten, the muscles in his arms twitching as they wanted to pull her in a reassuring embrace. Katniss cleared her throat and closed the gap between their bodies, wrapping her arms around his waist. The blond's arms closed instantly around her thin body, and he closed his eyes. He couldn't believe such a thing was happening, it was too good to be true. After a few seconds, she pushed him away violently, her breath erratic.

_" Th-That doesn't mean you can talk to me, " _she stuttered, pointing a finger at him. _" You still have to stay away from me! " _she added.  
Peeta's eyes widened, but he smiled, _" Okay. "_

Katniss turned around and ran away, leaving the bathrooms in a haste. The blond remained immobile for a while before he collected his belongings and left too, going back to his bedroom. He locked the door and slid under this covers, pulling them up his neck. Staring at the green ceiling, he broke into a laughter, Finnick was right once again, it could get better with time. It wasn't going to be simple, she would still be aggressive and on the defensive most of the time. Sometimes she would even be quiet and closer to him, but it wouldn't mean everything was going to be fine, there would always be distrust and arguments. Peeta closed his eyes, and hold onto this night encounter, choosing hope over fatality. Perhaps Katniss still needed him in some way, and she didn't know how to handle it, a fear of trusting him always coming back to her mind. The blond fell asleep with a smile on his face, and when he woke up, he almost jumped out of bed, excited about his friend's wedding. He checked his bracelet, and noticed the ceremony would start around 3 PM and that the party that followed ended at 12 PM. This event was so welcomed, and Peeta wished they'd never have to come back to their regular days in the district. The mission was two days away, and he couldn't start to imagine how that was going to be, with the probability of his own death. Calmly, he changed into a clean uniform and exited his room, heading for the cafeteria. Primrose was already there, as usual, with Gale, Katniss and her mother. The blond took his tray and joined the future wife and husband, both looking happier than ever.

_" So, " _he breathed out, sitting down. _" Big day today, uh? "  
_Finnick giggled, _" I've been trying to calm down, " _he stated. _" But I just can't! "  
_Annie tightened the grip on his arm, _" I can't believe this is happening, " _she said, her voice shaking. _" And I've seen the dress yesterday, it couldn't be prettier! "  
_Peeta smiled, taking a sip of his soya milk, _" I'm happy for you, " _he stated. _" I'm sure it's going to be beautiful. "_

Finnick told him about the room decoration and the beverages that Coin allowed for the party, and his friend drifted off, his mind lost in what happened during the night in the bathrooms. He knew he would find some time the next day to tell this to his friend, he couldn't wait to finally bring him some good news. Annie's eyes were covered by her ginger bangs, but Peeta could see that she was crying, and it made him kinda uncomfortable because she shouldn't be.

_" Hey Annie, it's alright, " _he murmured, trying to catch her gaze, _" You're getting married. "  
_She looked up, cheeks reddening, _" I-I'm sorry, it's just that I am so happy, " _she mumbled. _" And that mission to the Capitol is, you know, " _she inhaled deeply, making a pause. _" It's worrying me. "  
_Peeta shook his head lightly, _" You shouldn't worry, your future husband is stronger than I will ever be, " _he tried to reassure her. _" He can take care of himself just fine. "  
_Finnick kissed the top of her head, _" He's right, " _he agreed. _" And Peeta himself is quite skilled. "_

The ginger started laughing, and wiped her tears while apologizing, and the smaller blond ate his toast while Finnick helped his girlfriend to calm down. They finished their meal silently, and Peeta stopped by the library to read the copy of Lord of The Rings he started during the week. Once he got tired of it and his eyes started to itch, he left and went down to the training center, hoping to find the camouflage stand open for once. Fortunately, he saw the same assistant sitting alone, watching the rest of the hangar with a pained expression on his face. The blond smiled and joined him.

_" Soldier Mellark, it's a pleasure to see you, " _the man chanted, grinning. _" How have you been? "  
_The boy sat on a chair, _" Life's alright, and you? " _he asked back. _" I haven't seen you in a while. "  
__" Yeah, President Coin doesn't think camouflage is important in these times, " _the assistant replied, shaking his head. _" She thinks art is a waste of money and energy. "  
_Peeta heaved a sigh, _" Well, that doesn't really surprise me from her. "_

The assistant giggled and handed him a piece of paper along with charcoal. When Peeta asked about the day's subject, he told him to draw whatever made him happy, so he decided to portray Finnick and Annie during their first dance. As he drew the outlines with a pencil, the man asked him about the couple, and the blond ended up explaining how Finnick went from enemy, to ally, to friend. The assistant never interrupted him and let him talk as his pencil kept moving over the piece of paper, letting bodies slowly appear, step by step. Peeta couldn't help but smile as he retrieved a piece of charcoal, looking forward to the ceremony.

_" I have to admit President Coin amazes me, allowing such a thing, " _the assistant said, nodding to himself. _" I'm sure your friends will remember this day for the rest of their lives. "  
_Peeta looked up, _" For sure they will, it's more important than anything for them, " _he stated, smiling. _" And I totally understand that. "_

The boy remained drawing, thinking about Katniss again.

**/**

Katniss was in Gale's room, in Gale's bed, naked under the covers. She gave his former best friend a genuine smile and rolled off him, sighing in relief. Since a month, he had been the only thing she could hold onto, the only thing that made her life livable and that lessened the pain she felt. While she was in the tributes' center, Gale had been her anchor, keeping her from insanity and depression. So when he held her in his strong arms, there was no way she could refuse him a single thing, he was the most important thing she had, with her sister Prim.

_" You're okay Catnip? " _he asked, rolling on his side, still panting.  
She gave a nod, _" I am, and it's all because of you, " _she replied, some hair escaping her braid.  
Gale pecked her on the lips, pushing some bangs away from her face, _" What's on your mind? "_

The girl froze for a moment, thinking about how she pushed him away that night. He was just helping her, but it just wasn't enough, it was like something had been missing and Gale couldn't do anything to change that. It was when she heard Peeta Mellark's voice in the bathrooms that she calmed down slightly. She was unable to understand why she wanted to get to him at some times, because she knew for sure that she didn't trust him, that she couldn't trust him. So why was she attracted to his person like that? The boy was like an impossible puzzle for her, and a lot of pieces were missing or looking out of place.

_" Catnip? " _Gale insisted, setting a hand on top of her head.  
The girl smiled, _" Nothing, " _she sighed. _" Nothing's on my mind, " _she lied.

He pulled her closer to him, and she lied beside him. She heard his breathing getting slower and after a couple minutes, he started snoring. Katniss wished she could fall asleep too, but she was too afraid of having nightmares again. They were a terrifying mix of the time she spent in the Capitol as a prisoner and some violent scenario in which she ended up killing Peeta Mellark. Everything was confusing, because beside all the things the torturers showed her about him, she remembered the first time she saw him perfectly, with every single detail. This tiny memory compensated for the huge amount of videos she had been forced to watch when she was an hostage, but still she didn't know what she could trust. She had experienced so much horror in the Capitol, so much loneliness, that she couldn't be sure of that memory's existence, perhaps she made it up.

**/**

Peeta shook the assistant's hand and walked out of the tributes center, taking the stairs to go to the cafeteria since it was almost noon. He stopped by some bathrooms to wash his hands, water turning black in the sink. Once charcoal was totally gone, he dried his hands and headed to the cafeteria, where a plate of vegetable raviolis were waiting to be eaten on his tray. There was no sign of Finnick and Annie, and the blond deduced they were getting ready for their wedding. Gale and Katniss were missing too, but he chose not to think about it, they were probably together, enjoying each other's presence. The blond ate alone and left just as quietly as he had entered the canteen, a slight smile on his mouth. He waited for the ceremony's hour to come in the library, finishing the copy of Lord of the Rings he borrowed before.

* * *

**NDA: **

**I finished on time but forgot to post, I'm a big dummy!**

**Joshifer made me lose my mind and I thought I couldn't write, but I did! :)  
****Hope you enjoyed it,**

**Bisous,  
****Thank you for reading me.**


	34. Chapter 34 : What happened to you?

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 34: What happened to you?**

Coin had asked some of the district's citizen to clean up the Grand Hall, and to put some white banks and chairs in it, along with tables. The cooks of 13 had spent a full day in the kitchens to prepare for the event, making all sorts of snacks and canapes. Some people had used white sheets to decorate the space, and some jars had been filled with sand and seashells, then disposed it everywhere in the room. Children of the district had moulded starfishes, crabs and other sea creatures during the week, and their artworks were exposed as well.

Peeta couldn't believe how beautiful the Grand Hall looked, all white and blue, a hundred of people gathering and discussing, waiting for the ceremony to begin. The blond sat on a chair in the second row, next to the alley where a long white carpet had been settled, and looked around him, finding Plutarch Heavensbee talking with Boggs, a glass of juice in hand. He didn't have an opportunity to see the man in days, and had no idea what he could have been up to. The man noticed him and walked towards him, taking the available chair to his left.

_" How have you been Peeta? I've heard Katniss wasn't really nice to you, " _he told the blond, getting more comfortable. _" It's such a shame. "  
_Peeta sighed, _" I think it's getting better somehow, but it sure isn't a nice situation for me to be in, " _he replied, nodding. _" The Capitol did something to her, and I will find out once we get Snow, " _he added.  
_" But the tests were negative to any treatment, " _Plutarch stated. He took a sip of his beverage, _" You shouldn't get all anxious about that, perhaps the time she spent being a prisoner changed her mind on some subjects. "  
_The blond's eyes widened as anger ran through his veins, _" I'm telling you she's not the same as before, " _he insisted. _" I don't know what exactly happened in the tributes' center, but they had her for months. I don't think they just kept her, then released her, " _he continued, frowning. _" She is the mockingjay, and President Snow knows how important she is, he wouldn't give her back just like that. "_

Plutarch Heavensbee remained motionless, and speechless, and stared at the boy. He let out a shaky laughter and patted his shoulder, making the blond jolt.

_" You might be right Peeta, you might be right, " _the man breathed out, leaving him alone.

People sat down on the chairs and benches, and it all got very quiet, Finnick appearing by the end if the hall. He was wearing a white tux with a light blue bow tie, and the brightest smile you could imagine a person have. Because he didn't have any parents present, he walked along with Haymitch, and Peeta couldn't help but smile just like him. A little girl was playing piano, and once they reached the small altar, Annie walked in, in a wonderful white gown, tears of joy crawling down her flushed cheeks. Once she reached Finnick, they grabbed each other's hands and never let go, turning towards the priest.  
Just before they exchanged their vows, Katniss and Gale arrived in the hall, running, hand in hand, and sat in the last row.

_" I do, " _Finnick said, nodding.  
The priest smiled, _" You may now kiss the bride. "_

Peeta didn't feel his own body jump forward, and he stood in front of the couple that seemed unable to part, clapping his hands so hard it hurt. A little girl played the piano, the sweet melody revolving in the hall as Finnick and Annie thanked their guests. Plutarch joined a group of cooks, and they gave him a nod before exiting the room. Peeta found the newly weds, and they shared a calm but emotional embrace, Annie crying tears of joy in a constant flow.

_" Congratulations, " _the smaller blond said, smiling.  
Finnick giggled and slapped his friend on the shoulder, _" Thank you, very much. "_

Half an hour later, the benches and chairs had been moved and settled along the walls, leaving some room for people to dance, and a lot of snacks had been brought from the kitchens, Peeta taking a couple of chicken wings, too happy to eat real meal after months. He tranquilly made his way towards a buffet where the beverages were, and filled a plastic cup with cider, the only alcohol that had been allowed by the President for the party. The boy wasn't surprised to see Haymitch a few inches away, filling his glass over and over. He closed the gap between them.

_" That was a beautiful ceremony, don't you think? " _he told his ex-mentor.  
Haymitch almost chocked on his breath, apparently surprised by Peeta's presence, _" Oh boy, you scared the living shit out of me! " _he groaned, coughing. _" But yeah, I guess it was. Finnick deserves it, after everything he's been through… "  
__" That's for sure, " _the blond replied, nodding. _" I hope they'll get the chance to build their own family and grow old together, " _he added. He took a sip of his drink, _" They've owned it. "  
_Haymitch let out a tired sigh and finished his glass, _" Every single person that's been through the Games and back should have an happy, full life but man… It's never the case, " _he stated, refilling his cup. _" Most of us struggle until the day they die, because the Games destroy us and haunt us, dead bodies piling up in our dreams. "_

The boy was not used to hear the man speak so seriously, so he stared at him, his glass halfway between his mouth and the table. Haymitch looked more exhausted than ever, wrinkles covering his forehead, and Peeta felt his heart sink. This man was one of the bravest person he ever got the chance to meet. He had won a Quarter Quell with 48 tributes in it, had been forced to mentor around 50 children knowing they wouldn't make it, and he still managed to wake up every single morning. The blond knew for sure that he wouldn't have found this strength in him, it would've been too much of a burden and responsibility for his thin shoulders.

_" How's it going with the girl on fire? " _the man asked, heaving his eyebrows slightly. _" Is she still so hostile and edgy with you around? "  
_Peeta shrugged, staring at Finnick and Annie sharing a slow dance together, _" She made progress yesterday, and that's a relief. It means it can get better if we both can have some patience, " _he replied in a monotone voice. _" But I'm not sure she's even close to accepting me again, I think she still dislikes me a lot. "  
_Haymitch gave an understanding nod, _" Uh… I see. That's a shame, you too got along before, " _he sighed, running a hand through his thick blond hair. _" But don't lose faith, maybe the real Katniss is still there, the one that needs and loves you, the one that cares about you, " _he continued, optimistic about it all. _" You can't give up Peeta, we both promised that we would save her, remember? "  
_The boy gave a weak smile, _" She's miles away from Snow, I consider I've done my part, " _he retorted. _" There is absolutely nothing wrong with her, she is simply troubled by me. "_

This made Haymitch freeze for a moment. He stared a Peeta with a quizzical expression on his face, and refilled his cup once more, the liquid overflowing and dripping on the blue tablecloth. He growled and wiped it, mumbling all along while the blond's eyes still couldn't leave Finnick and Annie. They looked like the happiest people in the world, twirling and kissing in the middle of the hall, and nobody dared to join them as the little girl kept playing piano.

_" You and I both know that President Snow did something to her, boy, " _Haymitch blurted out. He slurped his cider noisily, _" And that means that we'll help her getting back to normal, even if to other people it doesn't mean a thing, it does to us. "  
_Peeta blinked repeatedly, surprised that the man cared that much, _" What's in it for you? "  
_His ex-mentor broke into a laughter, _" Boy, boy, there's nothing in it for me, not a single thing, " _he admitted, patting the blond's forearm. _" But just like I said before, we all deserve to live our lives to the fullest. And I don't think you will ever find happiness without that girl. "_

Peeta could imagine why the man was doing it, so maybe some kids he mentored would get to really live. He didn't want to get Haymitch's hopes down, but he refused to get his own up, because the future was uncertain. For sure, he wished he could be close to Katniss again one day, but he refused to dream about such a thing when their relationship was so tensed up.  
Annie and Finnick had been joined by a few couples while the girl left the piano and Beetee turned on some sort of radio, some 21st century's songs playing. The blond had never had the chance to listen to music, but it was highly enjoyable. Katniss and Gale were dancing, the boy's arm strong and protective around the girl waist, and the blond swallowed his sip with difficulty.

_" Don't you think I should let these two end up together? " _he asked his ex-mentor in a low voice.  
Haymitch rolled his eyes, _" And why exactly would you do such a thing? " _he asked back, laughing. _" You are in love with her, you should want to be by her side. "  
__" I do, I really do, " _Peeta breathed out. _" But I don't want to get in between them, that's all, " _he stated.  
The older man pouted, _" I can't believe you actually exist boy, " _he mocked him, kicking him gently in the ribs with his elbow. _" They're happy, I'll give you that, but what if Katniss's attitude changes and she remembers what the two of you had? What if it's what she really wants? "  
_Peeta's gaze dropped to the floor, _" She doesn't believe me, she might never do it again, " _he uttered in a sigh. _" And more important, she cannot trust me. With just that, the odds of us getting together are close to nonexistent. "  
__" You have to give her some time boy, " _Haymitch said with a smile on his face. He patted Peeta's shoulder, _" Don't be so pessimistic, it can get better. "_

The blond knew that he was being negative about the whole Katniss thing, but he only did it to avoid the probable repercussions of the current situation not changing. He filled his cup and left his ex-mentor, heading in the middle of the Hall where a dozen of people were casually dancing to a rhythmic tune. Peeta closed his eyes and started to move his body around shyly, he only slow danced before, still he managed not to look stupid. At some point Finnick joined him, fixing his bow tie.

_" How do you like the party buddy? " _he asked.  
Peeta practically giggled, _" It's amazing Finnick, I wish it could go on forever, " _he replied.  
The taller blond sighed happily, _" Yeah, me too… "  
_

They remained silent, observing the rest of the room, but after a few seconds, Finnick turned towards his friend.

_" You seem in better shape than usual, " _he stated. _" Did something good happen? "  
_The other blond nodded, smiling, _" Actually yes, I woke up during the night, and got to the bathrooms. Katniss was there with Gale, " _he explained. _" He left, and the two of us got to talk, we even hugged, " _he added. _" It felt so surreal. "_

Finnick broke into a laughter and grabbed his friend's shoulder, squeezing it lightly.

_" See? She took a step in your direction, " _he claimed a little too loud, people giving the pair a strange look. _" I am sure this will get better Peeta, it will. "  
_The boy licked his bottom lip, _" You seem to be right quite often so I'll believe you on that one, " _he replied in a soft voice.

Around 10 PM, a cook brought the cake Peeta had baked the previous day, and settled it on a table. Annie let out a gasp when she saw it, immediately pulling her husband by the hand and heading towards it. Plutarch provided them with a knife and they cut it together, people clapping their hands and whistling as they did so. Once everybody got a piece of it, the ginger walked towards Peeta and hugged him, giving him a thousand 'thank you'. He could only hug her back, her thin body trembling with emotion between his arms.  
The party went on, and ten minutes before midnight, Coin walked in and stopped the radio Beetee had supervised most of the night. She told everyone that they had to get to their bedrooms, and informed the present soldiers about a meeting the next morning at 9:30. Peeta noticed Haymitch sitting next to the drinks tables, and he helped him on his feet. Once the blond had walked his ex-mentor to his room, he got to his own and showered before sliding under his grey covers. The green of the walls seemed to soften with time, perhaps he finally accepted the color's meaning.

Peeta didn't wake up to any nightmare and joined Finnick and Annie in the canteen with a smile on his face. He had never been more relaxed even thought the mission's launching was the next day. They ate scrambled eggs and buttered toasts, the ginger remembering the past day without shedding a single tear. Peeta walked to the Commandment Center with Finnick, and they were still discussing when Coin, Beetee and Boggs entered the room.

_" Soldiers, your departure is due tomorrow at exactly 4 am, so be sure to go to bed early tonight, " _the President started, pulling on a chair and sitting on it. _" Today we'll let you discuss topics that leave you uncertain, details you want to talk about and such, " _she continued. _" So, who's first? "  
_Katniss stood up, _" If the train station in District 2 is actually a trap, how will we get to the Capitol? " _she asked.  
_" That's a very pertinent question, " _Coin stated, giving Beetee a side look. _" Using an hovercraft to cover this part of the journey would be risky, but that will be the only option unless you'd prefer to walk for months. "  
_The brunette curved an eyebrow, _" Can we really not go by plane? "  
__" No, Mr Latier and I had a long talk about this subject, and this time around, the Capitol will shoot any flying object that doesn't identify, " _the silver-haired woman replied, frowning slightly. _" Believe me Miss Everdeen, we'd like you to use hovercrafts too. "_

Katniss gave a nod and sat down. Cressida asked a few questions regarding the cameras they would have to bear, and Finnick about the maps they would be given.

Peeta stood up next, _" If you want to film and spread videos of us in the Capitol to the Districts, Snow will see them too, " _he started. _" How is this going to help us? I mean, he will definitely send peacekeepers. "  
_The brunette rolled her eyes, _" Probably, but we need the rebel's help Mellark, without them it's useless. They're important, and we have to show them they're not alone, " _she retorted. _" I thought you of all people would understand that. "  
__" I do, I do, don't get me wrong, " _the blond mumbled, lifting his hands over his head. _" The thing is that it will inform Snow of our presence, and that's a thing we have to avoid. "  
_Katniss sighed, _" He will know we're in the Capitol anyway, so we better encourage our people as well, " _she stated in a steady voice.

Peeta was happy to see that this side of the girl was still there, that she was still fighting for justice. He understood her point, still it was a problem, they would need every single minute out there, and this could cost them hours, maybe even a day, or more.

_" The later he knows, the better, " _he stated.

Katniss' attitude suddenly changed, her eyes widening, her pupils dilating so fast and widely it looked like her eyes turned black. Peeta took a cautious step back, his fake leg hitting the metal of his chair as he stared at her. Her arms were trembling and her hands were turning into fists, but there was some kind of sadness in her eyes.  
She remembered the weeks she spent in the tributes' center isolated from the world, with her television constantly on with Snow's voice commenting some footages of Peeta and her. It made her want to scream, to run away but she didn't. Everything was mixed together and she couldn't find the truth in all these lies.

_" You only care about your own ass here lover boy, " _she said, apparently fighting against herself. _" Stop being so self centered for once! " _she shouted, her voice crackling.

The blond wanted to reply something, but abstained, sitting back on his chair. It wasn't her fault, she was obviously struggling with herself more than with his presence, so he chose to give her the opportunity to sort things out. He saw Haymitch frowning as he watched the girl, and instantly knew that he understood the situation.

The ex-mentor stood up and took the girl by the arm, _" We're going to have a little talk, " _he told Coin. _" Don't worry, won't be too long. "_

The second the Commandment Center's doors closed behind them, Katniss pushed the man's hand away. She rubbed her arm nervously, as her anger slowly turned into panic. Her eyes were back to normal, but the shaking hadn't stopped, and Haymitch had to settled both hands on her shoulders to make her calm down.

_" What's wrong Katniss? " _he asked. _" What happened to you in the tributes' center? "  
_Her mouth trembled, and she lowered her head, _" I-I don't want to talk about it, " _she breathed out, shaking her head. _" It's a thing I'm trying to forget. "  
__" Which is normal sweetheart, but you have to share this memory with me first, as painful as it is, " _the man said in a calm tone. _" I know they did something to you in there, and doctors can't tell me otherwise. "_

She stumbled back, her back hitting the doors, and Haymitch gave her some time, rubbing circles on her shoulders with his thumbs.

_" I was alone everyday of every week I spent there, " _she whispered. _" The only face I saw was my own reflection in the tiny window of my cell's door, " _she continued, her voice getting quieter. _" There was television in there, and I couldn't turn it off. When I finally got to fall asleep, I could still hear President Snow's voice clearly. "  
_Haymitch pinched his lips together and inhaled a sharp breath, _" What was he saying to you? "  
_Katniss sobbed, _" Th-Those videos, I saw them a hundred, maybe a thousand times over and over, there was no way to make it stop, no way, " _she managed to answer through gritted teeth. _" I screamed until my voice was totally gone to cover his voice, all the time, but he kept saying that Peeta Mellark was… "  
__" That he was what sweetheart? " _he asked gently, his hands now massaging her shoulder blades.  
She sighed, sobbed once more, _" A monster, " _she uttered in a cry. _" All he did was protecting himself, and I know he's right, he has to be, " _she said rapidly, swinging her head back and forth. _" He has to be right, " _she repeated. _" Peeta isn't a good person, he was only manipulating me so he could live, it has to be the truth, it has to. "_

Haymitch's movements on her back stopped and he removed his hands, taking a step back. He put a hand under Katniss' chin and made her look at him.

_" Katniss, President Snow did that to compromise you, " _he stated, his voice steady and low. _" He did that because when you two were together, you were a serious threat to his actual position, you have to understand that. "  
_The girl frowned, _" Peeta, " _she screamed, her breathing getting heavier. _" Peeta and I were never a thing, " _she growled deep in her throat, her eyes getting darker. _" He used me all along! "_

She made a pause, looking around her, and Haymitch's words got stuck somewhere between his brain and his mouth. It frightened him how she could be so fragile one second, then so menacing the next.

_" You have to believe me Haymitch, I watched these recordings for months, " _she continued, gesturing strangely to the door in her back. _" His attitude is one of a betrayer, one of someone nobody should trust, " _she added, anger making her voice tremble. _" He could kill you in your sleep! "  
_Haymitch's eyes widened, " _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"  
_" Oh yeah, I know him. I do. He totally would, "_ she replied.

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch. She almost clicked on the button of the door, but her ex-mentor pulled her away from it, and caged her in his strong arms. Her nails started digging in his arms, and she screamed, trying to make him let go of her.

_" Katniss, you have to listen very carefully now, " _he told her, taking some steps back. _" What Snow told you isn't true. This man wants you dead. You do want him dead too, so why do you still believe in his words? "  
_She stopped moving, _" If he wanted me dead, he wouldn't have let me escape the tributes' center, he would've killed me there, " _she replied, her voice unsure. _" On the other hand, Peeta teamed up with the Careers that tried to kill me. "  
__" Katniss, he released you because he knew you'd think this way, " _Haymitch stated, his grip losing strength. _" He knew you would think he was being kind, but men like him aren't nice people, " _he continued.  
The girl's hands dropped, fingertips covered in her ex-mentor's blood, _" Then who is? " _she asked in a resigned tone.  
_" You, Finnick, Annie, Beetee, Peeta, Gale, Plutarch, Johanna, " _the man answered in a whisper. _" Your sister, your mom, Cinna, Effie, Cressida, Pollux, Paylor, Boggs, Jackson, and many others, " _he continued. _" Weren't you the one saying that rebels were important and fighting for the good cause before? "_

He finally let her out of his arms, and she turned around, facing him. She showed a lot of different expressions on her face, and Haymitch knew he found the words, he knew the Katniss that loved Peeta was trapped in there, somewhere. He pulled her in a hug, but she didn't make any move, apparently chocked by the turn of the conversation.

_" Now, I'll get Peeta here, " _he said, nodding. _" I think you'll know what to do. "_

She waited motionless outside while he opened the doors, and when she heard them close again, she refused to turn around. Peeta circled her carefully and slowly, stopped in front of her. She dared looking up at him, and saw a faint smile at the corner of his mouth, with the right touch of forgiveness. They stared at each other for a while, a few inches separating their bodies.

_" I'm sorry, " _she uttered in a sigh. _" I'm sorry I'm like that, " _she clarified.  
Peeta gave a shake of head, _" That's not a thing you should be apologizing for Katniss, " _he reassured her.  
She vaguely cleared her throat, _" I shouldn't have screamed at you like that, " _she insisted. _" And I'm not just talking about today, " _she added. _" I can imagine how lost and hurt you have been all this time, and you didn't deserve that, even less from me, " _she continued.

He made no move, said no word. Katniss took a step forward, their closeness bringing a comfortable sensation she didn't have the chance to feel for months. She wanted to curl up in her bed, to hide under the covers somehow, to get away from him, but it wasn't because of the reasons she had since she got in the District. Peeta's blue eyes had a softness she found herself wanting to see more, and this sudden change scared her, the tables had turned so fast.

_" It's okay Katniss, " _he told her.

She didn't know what this meant, but his arms closed around her shoulders, large hands gentle and warm in her back. She lifted her own arms, muscles jolting. Her own body seemed to be unable to complete the simplest task, but eventually, she wrapped her arms around him, her face finding the place where his neck met his shoulder. Hot breath found Peeta's skin and he allowed his eyes to fall shut, he had been waiting for this to happen for what felt like an eternity. They remained like that for a while, Katniss pulling the blond closer, fingers hesitantly running up his spine and sliding through soft blond curls. Peeta let out a silent moan at the contact, and held her closer, his arms circling her waist, wishing he wouldn't have to let her go again. The two of them lost sense of time, finding shelter and comfort in each other's arms, soldiers leaving the Commandment Center not disturbing them a bit. Haymitch smiled and high five'd Finnick, and both of them left without a word. Gale walked out last with Coin and Beetee, and stopped in the doors' frame, eyes wide open.

The President of the District shot him a look, _" Soldier Hawthorne, we have to go to Mr Latier's lab, " _she stated.  
_" Yeah, right, " _the boy answered with a nod.

He followed the silver-haired woman, leaving Peeta and Katniss in the corridor, on their own. The blond didn't want to be the one to let go, all he wanted was to stop time. Katniss lifted her head, their faces so close the tip of their noses touched.

_" We should probably move, " _she breathed out, her voice an octave lower than usual.

Peeta gave a nod, his arms falling at his sides. Katniss' eyes couldn't look away from him, from his face, but she turned around and walked towards the elevator, the boy watching her as she did so. She looked over her shoulder.

_" Aren't you coming? " _she asked.

He joined her, his real leg trembling, and got in the elevator next to her. She eyed the buttons, and Peeta tapped on the highest level one, the machine moving upward once the doors closed. They sat on the bench, Katniss' head in the crook of Peeta's neck, and at some point, both of them fell asleep.  
When Peeta's eyes fluttered open, he felt warmth enveloping him. Katniss was still sleeping, a hand on top of his chest. He was hungry, but waking her up wasn't an option for him, he figured she was exhausted, he knew she was. Carefully, he ran a hand in her black hair, moving some bangs that fell on her eyes and cheeks away. She mumbled, and sinked her head further in his neck, fingers crawling up his torso and settling over his collarbone. He drifted into sleep again, and when both of them woke up, it was almost dinner time.

* * *

**NDA: Here's the 34th chapter**

**It was such a pleasure writing it, such a relief comparing to other ones (haha)**

**I've read your reviews and I know the Gale/Katniss dynamic was not expected, but it goes along with what's coming next. ( In fact I wrote the second to last chapter months ago, and it makes sense, you'll see )**

**I hope you enjoyed it as much as I liked doing it.**

**Thanks for reading me,  
****bisous.**


	35. Chapter 35: I don't want anyone to worry

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 35: I don't want anyone to worry about me**

Katniss' head was resting on Peeta's chest, a hand protectively wrapped around his shoulders, silence surrounding them in the last level of 13. The blond had never had such a resting sleep, such a calm sleep, and he could only recall how being with the girl helped him getting through his life since the Games. She moved a bit, her eyes fluttering open, and gave the boy a smile.

_" Hi, " _he breathed out, running a hand in her black hair.  
She rubbed her nose, _" Hi. "_

They stared at each other for a while, both hungry but not willing to leave. Katniss was slightly confused about how she got so close to the boy in such a short time, but she couldn't deny how good it felt. In his arms, all of her fears seemed to vanish one by one, and this was more than she could afford with the current situation they were all in. A hand rubbed her back and shoulders, and she hummed happily, letting her head sink further in the blond's neck.

_" We should probably go, " _Peeta sighed, obviously not wishing to do so.

Katniss nodded, but it took several minutes for them to untangle their bodies. The boy stood up first, and took the girl's hand, pulling her up on her feet. This simple contact made her want to never leave him again, the closeness of their bodies leaving the tips of her being to tickle ever so slightly. She would never admit it, but this simple fact reminded her of the desire she perhaps had felt before, in the arena, on the beach. They took the elevator and entered the cafeteria together, hand in hand. One look at Katniss and Peeta knew he didn't want to let her go, not this soon, his fingers tensing up in her gentle hold.

She slid an index along his white knuckles, _" Don't worry, I'm not going far away. "  
__" I know that, " _he replied, smiling sadly.  
Her gaze dropped to his mouth for a second, _" I won't let us part again, " _she uttered in a breath, looking into his blue eyes again. _" Okay? "_

It was as simple as something could be, but it made Peeta's hand relax in hers, and slowly, their fingers brushing in the process, he let her head to her own table. He joined Finnick and Annie, unable to contain the smile on his mouth. When his friend asked him about it, he just laughed and shook his head childishly, glaring at the brunette for a moment. They talked about everything that wasn't the next day's mission, eating their portions of carrots and beans. Peeta left the table before the couple, craving for a long shower.

Once cleaned up, he drew for hours on some torn pages of a notebook, his wrist hurting by the end, fingers darkened by the charcoal he used. Lazily, he set up his tiny alarm clock, maybe for the last time, and slid under his covers, eyelids too heavy for him to fight the sleepiness.

Peeta was already awake when the ringing echoed in his room, so he turned the clock off and sat up, his whole body trembling from apprehension. The real rebellion was about to start. Everything they had done since then was going to be paid from that moment on. He closed his eyes, inhaled deeply and tried to relax a bit, enough to get on his feet and take one of his grey uniforms. Beetee had informed the members of the squads that uniforms provided with bulletproof shirts would be available in the hovercraft for all of them. He shot a glance at his crossbow before leaving, a shaky sigh passing the barrier of his lips.

/

The canteen was awfully silent, soldiers eyeing their plates without appetite, all seated around a single table.

_" Good morning Peeta, " _Finnick breathed out, a weak smile on his face.  
The boy nodded, sitting next to him, _" Good morning. "_

Peeta forced himself and ate his scrambled eggs, the hand holding his fork shaking in all directions. Noticing how nervous he was, Finnick slid a hand in his back, and gave him a comforting smile.

_" It's okay to be afraid, really, " _he told him in a gentle voice. _" But you told me that we would be going through this together, and that is still true. "  
_The smaller blond munched on his bite, swallowed it, _" You're right, we'll be together, it will be fine. "_

The blond knew that it wouldn't be easy, and that his eyes would have to see too much horror during this mission, he wasn't fooling himself. But Finnick's presence by his side was going to make things a little less hard, a bit less unbearable. Half an hour before the departure, Peeta got to his room to retrieve his weapon, then headed to the hovercraft's hangar, his heart stuck in his throat. An assistant from the training center handed him a huge backpack which he grabbed. It was heavy, a sleeping bag rolled on top, bottles of water and cans of food filling it. Alma Coin walked in, followed by Plutarch Heavensbee, Haymitch and Beetee.

_" Soldiers, I wish you the best luck in this capital operation, " _she stated, clutching her hands together. _" Your earpieces will now be given to you, please be really careful and keep it safe, " _she continued. _" You will find a map, supplies and ammunition in your bags, guns are already on board. There will be a revolver and a shotgun for each of you. "_

Beetee rolled forward and soldiers lined up in front of him to get their earpieces.

_" I will instruct you from 13, give your instructions when it will be needed, " _Coin continued. _" Mr Latier will also be able to guide you through the streets and warn you about any new traps. He will be available to help you with any technical problem as well. "_

The silver-haired woman waited, impatient, for the distribution to be over.

The engineer rolled backward and stopped next to the President, _" Thanks to Cressida, Pollux and Castor, the second team will be recorded through the expedition. Which means you'll have to stop in order to get certain footages for the propaganda, as unnecessary as it sounds, " _he explained, even thought the soldiers had already been told that. _" In case of any bad wound occurring to a soldier, we'll get a contact with the hospital to try to help you from afar. If any repatriation is needed, President Coin will take the final decision on wether to send an hovercraft or not. "_

While the President and Plutarch kept giving advices and directives to the soldiers, Haymitch joined Peeta and Finnick, then motioned for Katniss to get closer.

_" I know you guys can make it, " _he whispered, frowning seriously. _" And you have to, " _he added, nodding to himself. " _And never forget we're on each other's side. "  
_Finnick laughed, stressed and anxious, _" It sounds so easy in your mouth, Haymitch. "  
_The older man rolled his eyes, _" I'm not saying it will be a simple thing to do, I'm just telling you that you must hold on and come back in one piece. "_

Peeta looked at Katniss, her hair styled into a side braid once again. It was a little detail, but it meant so much at the same time. He smiled, then turned his attention back on his ex-mentor. He wished the man's words could comfort him and give him some sort of strength or courage before this long journey, but all he could feel was fear, an unavoidable and unescapable fear. Haymitch shook his shoulder lightly, and the blond resurfaced from his own mind, and gave a weak nod, his blue eyes looking around like a wounded animal.

_" Hey boy, it will be fine, you won't be alone, " _the blond man said, trying to meet the ex-tribute's gaze.  
Peeta smiled, but felt like on the edge of crying, _" I-I know that, " _he stuttered hesitantly.

Katniss got by his side, and joined their hands together, not saying a word or looking in his direction. The boy hugged Haymitch with one arm, dreading the moment they'll have to really leave 13, perhaps forever. All he had been waiting for was for this moment to arrive, Snow being arrested and judged, but it didn't make the whole situation easier to handle, not at all. The brunette pulled him towards the hovercraft, and he followed, limping behind her.

_" Good luck on your way soldiers, " _Coin stated, smiling as the two squads entered the plane. _" Be brave. "_

Peeta stared at the closing door, frozen, his hand in Katniss' moist and tensing up. Finnick stared at the two of them, his mouth half-open, then broke into an soft and discreet laughter, cupping his cheeks with his hands. He was happy for his friends, for both of them, and prayed for this closeness to last. Cressida and Jackson were smiling as well, surprised by the turn of events.

_" Come on, we'll sit, " _the girl whispered, guiding Peeta in the hovercraft as it lifted from the ground. _" Come on. "_

Her voice was soft, not a bit forceful, and she waited for him to move on his own. They sat next to each other, their hands never unlinking, while Boggs joined Gale in the commanding booth. The flight lasted long hours, but neither Katniss or Peeta untangled their fingers, their arms hurting and cramping. Soldiers were all quiet, except from Gale and Boggs, that communicated with District 13 by radio. The sky was clear ahead, a few cumulonimbus floating aimlessly in the ending night, but Beetee suggested a deviation from their original route, in case the Capitol knew about their movements. It was planned that this part of their journey would be safe, but they couldn't afford a probability, and chose a longest road over a dangerous one. They avoided district 5 and 4, the engineer stating that they had recently put up some sort of sky surveillance, making the flight half an hour longer than expected.

**/**

Gale turned on his co-piloting chair, _" You should get ready to leave the hovercraft, " _he shouted, waking a few soldiers up. _" Beetee just gave us indications on about the place where we'll be landing, but I'm afraid we'll have to walk a bit to get to the train station. "_

The squad members didn't discuss over this statement, and undid their security belts, got up and retrieved their weapons, backpacks and uniforms.

_" Don't change, you'll do that on the train, " _Boggs added, the plane slowing down. _" The second group, guided by Paylor, will leave the hovercraft first and make sure the path is clear from there to the station. "  
_Paylor nodded, and turned her Holo on, _" It's less than two miles away, we should get back to you in approximatively thirteen minutes. "  
_Coin's secondhand frowned, _" Please leave three or four soldiers halfway, in case something occurs. "_

The dozen soldiers from the group got in front of the back door of the hovercraft, weapons at the ready, and when the plane finally hit the ground, Paylor opened the door manually. They carefully checked around, then headed towards the station, the black woman in front, her gaze going from the forest in front of her to the Holo on her wrist.  
Inside the plane, the first squad members waited silently for any feedback, silence growing strong and suffocating. Peeta swore he could hear the sound of electricity traveling through the display, his right hand still attached to Katniss'.

_" Hey, " _her clear voice whispered. _" Just breathe, it will be fine, " _she breathed out, trying to reassure the blond, squeezing his hand in hers.

He looked up at her, his eyes narrowed in concern, and she offered him a gentle smile, her head tilting slightly to the left. She was scared too, practically mortified, but it was no use worrying about what they were going to go through. It seemed strange to her that it affected Peeta that much, as in all the videos she watched, he looked pretty confident and fearless. Perhaps Snow lied about this side of the boy too, perhaps he really was goodhearted. She still had a lot of doubts and an unresolved problem of not understanding him, but somehow she felt as if she could trust him.

_" I'm sorry, " _he apologized, his gaze dropping to the plane's floor. _" I don't want anyone to worry about me. "  
_Katniss raised her eyebrows, _" Of course we will worry, " _she sighed, shaking her head. _" It's not a bad thing, it means we care about you. "_

Peeta stopped breathing for a split second, images of the past flashing in his mind. Katniss and him, on the beach. He looked up slowly, and used his free hand to push some black bangs away from her face, exposing her grey eyes, his hand resting on Katniss' cheek. These words made his heart lighter, and he was absolutely sure he couldn't survive a life without that girl.

_" You shouldn't depreciate yourself so much Peeta, " _she added in a breath.

It was the first time she called him by his name since she came back from the tributes' center, and it made something in the boy's mind light up. His fingers slid down Katniss' neck, his thumb rubbing the olive skin gently. It was certain that he could never love someone that much in his life, nobody could make his emotions drop and rise the way Katniss did.

_" You're right, " _he agreed, smiling. _" We might be dead before sunset, we can't afford to waste more time… " _he continued.

Katniss' eyes widened, and she lowered her head, the boy's fingers warm on her skin. She perfectly knew what he meant by that. They had been testing each other's feelings and honesty for so long that they had forgotten about their own happiness and needs. In their small lives, there had been so much pain that it had swallowed many good things, poisoned their joy and hid the beauty of life itself. But Katniss knew that all these terrible experiences would only make the good ones even better and stronger.

_" Exactly, " _she told him.

She stood up, noticing how every other soldier had already prepared their weapons and filled their backpacks with ammunitions. Taking a step forward, she was held back by Peeta's hand, still linked to hers.

_" We should get ready as well, " _she explained.  
The blond gave a nod, _" Sure. "_

Their hands untangled, hurting from the hours of holding, and they parted. Finnick almost jumped on Peeta's back while he was crouching, and the smaller boy jerked in surprise.

_" I think you owe me some explanations there buddy, about what happened yesterday, " _the man said, a huge grin on his face, his dimples appearing on his cheeks.  
Peeta giggled, retrieving his shotgun, _" Is it really the moment? "  
_Finnick rolled his eyes, still smiling, _" Come on, at least give me the highlights! " _he grumbled, shaking his friend's shoulders vividly.

Peeta was expecting this from the other blond, but at any minute they might be leaving the plane, and heading for the train station.

_" We'll talk on our way, " _he assured his friend, peeking over his shoulder to look at him. _" I promise, " _he added, seeing the unconvinced expression on his face.  
Finnick got up, _" Then, it's a deal, " _he claimed, winking playfully at Peeta.

The blond was closing his backpack when Gale and Boggs rushed through the hovercraft, towards the exit, every squad member following them.

_" Everything seems clear on Paylor's side, we can go, " _Coin's secondhand stated, a hand on his earpiece. He turned on his heels and straightened up, his shotgun under his armpit, a finger on the trigger. _" Soldiers, now is the time, please take all your belongings, and get in ranks, " _he said in a firm voice, frowning seriously. _" Get in pairs. I want Katniss right in the middle, " _he added, leading the way.

They all got outside, dawn and coldness surrounding them. Peeta got next to Finnick, right behind Cressida and Jackson. He took in a deep breath, appreciating the smell of pine trees and fresh grass; oh how he missed being outside. The formation started jogging along a dark alley, then took a turn on the right to find cover in the woods. The boy could only imagine the smile on Katniss' face from being in a forest, but that wasn't enough to make him more relaxed.

_" So, tell me all about it, " _Finnick uttered in a breath.  
Peeta laughed quietly, _" I don't know what happened when Haymitch and her where outside of the Commandment Center, but when I joined her, she apologized for her behavior, " _he explained, panting slightly.  
His friend cocked an eyebrow, _" I'm sure he found the right words, " _he confirmed, nodding. _" He might be a drunkard, but he's still as wise as a man can be. "_

Peeta knew it very well, even thought he had been reticent about the man's behavior when he met him, years did made him understand why he lost himself in alcohol. Haymitch was what he had closest to a family, now that his real one was dead.

_" We hugged, and ended up falling asleep on the bench, " _Peeta finished, his eyes focused on Katniss' skull, three ranks ahead of their position. _" I still can't believe it. "  
_Finnick laughed, and started coughing, _" That's fucking amazing! " _he managed to say, struggling to regain his breath. _" I'm happy for you, really."_

The blond smiled, but Boggs gave them a judging glare. The two boys had forgotten where they were for a minute or so, and Peeta felt bad for being so noisy. Soldiers kept running through the woods, guided by Paylor, talking to Coin's secondhand through the earpiece. A few members of the first group had been waiting for them to arrive, and joined the cortege, halfway from the station.

_" When we'll get to the train station, put your own earpieces on, " _Boggs instructed. _" Then the first group will leave as soon as possible. "_

The rest of the road to the station was quiet and without any trouble, so they paused in the hangar, squad members searching for their earpieces through their huge backpacks. Boggs talked with Paylor that just finished changing into her new uniform while soldiers got inside the first wagon in complete silence.

_" Good luck, " _Coin's secondhand said to Paylor as she climbed on the train.  
She gave him a quick nod, _" We'll stay in touch. "_

Peeta and Finnick sat on the floor, putting their bags next to them, and watched the train leaving the station, praying for their teammates' safety. The road from District 3 to District 2 wasn't long, and took less than an hour, so hopefully they wouldn't be stopped by some peacekeepers or shot by a surveillance hovercraft on their way. The taller blond stared at Katniss, talking with her best friend, and Peeta noticed it, pushing him playfully with his elbow.

_" I wonder how Gale feels about all of this, " _Finnick breathed out, shaking his head very slightly. _" The poor guy must be completely lost. "  
_Peeta's gaze found the floor, _" I'm pretty sure he is, I was in his shoes before, " _he replied. He bit his bottom lip, _" But I'm not sure Katniss is ready to let him go. "  
_His friend gave him a serious look, _" From my point of view, I don't think she ever gave up on you, " _he stated, _" I can't be sure of that because I wasn't with her in the tribute center. But I understood what she felt for you before that, during the Quarter Quell, it seemed clear to me. She loves you. "_

The blond smiled and looked up, holding his knees to his chest, his eyes finding Katniss instantly. Finnick and him had this conversation before, more than once, but he didn't think it really mattered, now that they were heading to the Capitol. It still had a lot of importance, but it wasn't the priority, and he knew it had never been, wether it affected him or not.

_" That's a possibility, but right now we have other things to worry about, " _he sighed, running a hand through his blond hair. _" We should take a look at this map. "_

His friend's eyes widened, but he opened his backpack, and searched for the piece of paper. Once he found it, he unfolded it, and the two of them stared at it for a moment.

_" If the train station of 2 is clear, we should arrive by 8:10, " _Finnick explained, his index sliding along the railroad. _" Then, our next stop would be this first shelter right here, " _he continued, pointing at a building colored in green. _" But reaching it before sunset seems unlikely. "  
_Peeta nodded, _" We'll have to find some place else, perhaps some abandoned house, " _he agreed. _" The only problem is that Beetee told us that this area was still inhabited. So I guess we'll have to sleep outside, or in the sewers. "_

They kept analyzing the map, looking for some deviation that could offer them more time, avoid more traps, but nothing was certain since the Capitol added new ones everyday in random locations. Boggs was the only one provided with a Holo in the squad, so the boys knew he was more reliable than these paper plans, that they would have to trust him on the way.

_" You don't want to talk about it, but it means a lot to me! " _Katniss shouted at Gale. _" Stop being such a coward and hear me out! "_

Every soldier's attention got immediately fixed on the two best friends, surprised that a quarrel between them was really happening. Gale just shrugged, and Katniss rolled her eyes exaggeratively, sighing.

The brunette stood up, then turned on her heels, _" I mistook you for someone else. You always told me the truth before, but now you're just running away and hiding, " _she continued.  
Gale didn't even look at her when he answered, _" Listen, I just want to get this mission done, that's all, " _he uttered in a groan. _" Once it's over, we'll talk about whatever personal subject you want. "  
_Katniss frowned, _" You're just too frightened to discuss this, " _she replied, her voice sharp, judgmental.  
_" If that's what to want to think, feel free to do so, " _her best friend blurted out.

Peeta had guessed the nature of their argument, and felt bad they had to come to this. Apparently, they disagreed quite often when they were alone, but he didn't imagine that he'd contemplate it one day.

The brunette walked away from him, _"I'll make my round, " _she informed Boggs as she took her bow on her way outside.

Coin's secondhand didn't even get the chance to answer, she was already gone.

Finnick massaged his temples, _" I think you and I know what it was all about, " _he mumbled. _" That's eerie to see these two being so upset though, " _he continued. _" Well, Katniss was, " _he added in a breath.  
Peeta let out a sigh, the back of his head finding the wall behind him, _" Don't worry, they'll get through it once Katniss calms down, " _he muttered.

About ten minutes later, Peeta had fallen asleep, his head falling from time to time on his friend's shoulder that couldn't stop giggling every time he did so. Finnick didn't want to wake him up since they wouldn't have many occasions to get a good sleep during the operation. Katniss walked back in the station about fifteen minutes later, and sat in front of the two blonds.

_" What was that earlier? " _Finnick whispered in a soft voice.  
The brunette sighed, _" I think it just wasn't exactly the time to talk about Peeta, " _she answered, offering the boy a shy smile. _" Everything changed so fast. "  
_The blond settled a hand on her shoulder, _" I'm sure you'll work it out, " _he reassured her, squeezing her gently. _" Don't overdo it. "  
_

Katniss gave a discreet nod, and looked at Peeta, snoring quietly on his friend's shoulder. He looked extremely peaceful, his mouth slightly open.

_" It appears that you did a great job with him, " _she murmured, reaching out to rub his skull.  
Finnick shook his head, smirking, _" He looked after me just as much, " _he stated, staring down at the blond. _" We've been through a lot, and I'm glad he was here all along, " _he added.  
The girl smiled back, _" Really, thank you for taking care of him, " _she insisted, her fingers now massaging Peeta's head.

He growled, and turned his head slightly, pivoting it so his nose was sinked in his friend's shoulder.

_" I don't know if you remember that part of him, but he has always been too gentle, " _Finnick sighed. _" He's too kind for all that happened to him, " _he continued. _" I'm not saying it's not tough on our sides, but Peeta is pretty different from us. "_

The girl couldn't recall something like that. While she was locked in that room in the tribute center, Snow's voice repeated that the boy was heartless, self-centered and that he didn't care about anything, except his own survival and well-being. She gave Finnick a questioning look, because even thought she got closer to Peeta physically, she felt as if they were strangers, that they just met. Time was running out, and she wished they could just talk about him all day long.

_" I'd love to hear more about him, I'm not sure my memory serves me well, " _she mumbled, her voice soft and hesitant. _" My sister gave me her notebook, but I didn't really have the opportunity to read it. I only saw his sketches. "_

She got up, and Finnick watched her as she searched through her own bag, then got the heavy leather-covered book out.

Katniss sat down once more, _" Prim told me to take it with me, so I did, " _she continued, caressing the edge. _" I'm not sure I'm ready to go through her notes just yet. "  
_The blond eyed the notebook, _" Then wait until you are, " _he simply replied.  
_" I don't think we have enough time for me to tiptoe around it, " _she sighed, opening it.

The drawing of the mockingjay Peeta did months ago stood there, and Katniss stared at it for a while, taking all the details in.

_" He sure is talented, " _she whispered to herself. _" This bird looks like he's about to spread his wings and fly away from the page. "  
_Finnick nodded, _" He can portray reality really well, that's quite amazing, " _he agreed. _" When you see his artwork, you travel with it. "_

Katniss flipped the page and started reading her sister's commentary about the reaping. As words followed one another, she felt a stirring sensation extend in her chest, and had to pause. She looked up at Finnick, her fingers trembling around the notebook, grey eyes opened in shock.

_" Hey, you're alright? " _the blond asked, genuine concern in his voice.

She opened her mouth, shut it quickly and exhaled loudly through her nose, closing her eyes tightly. It was so confusing to get different point of views on the same event, and everything was getting muddled in her mind. Primrose wouldn't lie, not in her own diary. So why did she feel so helpless?

_" Y-Yeah, " _she stuttered, putting some of her black bangs behind her ears.

Every sentence she read brought some clarity, and she calmed down, the shaking of her hands soothing progressively. She glanced over the notebook to look at Peeta, his eyes fluttering open as he woke up. Quickly, she remained reading, starting to believe that the boy couldn't be as bad as the Capitol described him. Prim herself seemed to really appreciate him, and had tried to convince her about his kindness as soon as she arrived in 13.

_" I can't believe I just fell asleep, " _Peeta mumbled in a sleepy voice. _" Are we leaving soon? "  
_Finnick shook his head, _" No, I think there's still twenty minutes left until their train reaches District 2. "_

The smaller blond noticed Katniss, the notebook in her hands, and froze for a split second. She looked absorbed into her reading, regarding the slightly frown on her forehead. Peeta rearranged his hair and stretched his arms up, smiling childishly.

Katniss flipped the first page, willing to finish the first part of the book. The two blonds didn't say a word, willing to give her the time she needed to read. She reached the bottom of the second page, and when Prim mentioned how guilty she felt for her volunteering, she shut the notebook, and put it on her lap.

_" You took it with you? " _Peeta asked, obviously surprised.  
Katniss nodded, _" Prim wanted me to, " _she explained, setting a hand on top of it. _" When she heard that I only looked at your illustrations, she gave it back to me. "  
_Finnick giggled happily, _" She really likes your drawings, " _he laughed.

Katniss and Peeta stared at each other, both smiling. The blond lost himself in the pair of grey eyes in front of him, a burning sensation making root comfortably in his stomach. Her gaze seemed to pierce through his whole being, intensity glowing in the clear orbs. Finnick got up and made his round, none of his friends questioning his move. Peeta was too fascinated by Katniss. He held his breath when she scooted closer to take his hand in hers, their knees bumping together awkwardly.

_" Do you want to read with me? " _she asked, pulling the notebook out. _" I think it will be easier this way, " _she continued, opening it. _" With you, " _she specified.  
He nodded, letting her move to his side, _" I will. "_

* * *

**NDA: Here's the 35th chapter of IIWIYS!  
****This one is calmer and softer than the ones I'm writing now.**

**Be prepared for the coming chapters,  
****it will feature more action,  
****and supposedly more pain.**

**Thanks for reading me,  
****bisous.**


	36. Chapter 36 : Don't worry, it's fine

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 36 : Don't worry, it's fine**

Peeta slid an arm around Katniss' shoulder as she reopened her sister's notebook, picking up where she left it a few minutes earlier. The passage summarized the chariot presentation, where they got 'set on fire' by Cinna and shocked the audience of Panem. The boy remembered how he tried to take Katniss' hand in hers, and how she pulled away from it.

_" I'm sorry I kinda forced you into holding hands, "_ he breathed out. _" I should've talked about it to you before. "  
_She looked up from the book, and gave him a slight shake of head, _" That's fine, "_ she assured him, smiling. _" I'm sure it helped me get some sponsors, "_ she added. _" I'm sure you remember how bad I am with people. "  
_Peeta chewed on his bottom lip for a while, _" You're just making sure you don't put your trust into someone that could throw it away, or betray you, "_ he replied.  
Katniss tilted her head to the side, _" I'm not a hundred percent sure about that, "_ she sighed. _" But I accept this analysis of yours. "_

They remained reading, appreciating how fitting Prim's words were. It brought them into the Games once more, angst and dread resurfacing as sentences came one after another. Katniss made sure Peeta was done reading each time she reached to bottom of a page.  
Soon, they got to the part of the interviews with Ceasar Flickerman, and the blond swallowed with difficulty. He could only imagine how trapped, how insecure and deceived, Katniss was feeling after his insinuation.

He clucked soundlessly, _" Sorry about this too, "_ he said._ " Even thought we both apologized once. "  
_Katniss put a hand on top of his, resting on his knee, "_ We did? I don't remember anything like that, "_ she asked in a haste. _" Could you tell me more? "_

The interest in her voice was unmistakable, and she really looked thirsty for any information he could give her. Peeta's eyes clenched distressfully, because this only reminded him of the treatment she had received in the Capitol. It hit him unforgivingly, right where it already hurt. Nobody knew about the night encounter they had shared, and yet, she couldn't remember it.

_" Are you alright? "_ she asked, drawing closer to him. _" You look kinda pained… "  
_The blond's eyes widened,_ " Ye-Yeah, I'm sorry, "_ he uttered in a breath, running his available hand in his hair. _" I just… "_

His eyes laid on her mouth for a second, and he wetted his lips unconsciously. She didn't need to hear about this exact insecurity, she was getting better and he clearly had no right, nor the will or ability, to take that away from her.

_" Never mind, " _he sighed. _" I'm fine. "  
_She frowned, squeezing his hand in hers, _" You're not, "_ she stated.  
He squeezed her hand back, _" I'm fine, let's keep reading, " _he insisted gently. _" I just zoned out. "_

She looked anything but convinced by his excuse, her eyes hovering over his face to look for any trace of discomfort. Before she could ask more, Boggs got up, and ran in front of the train.

_" Soldiers, Lieutenant Paylor just confirmed that the train station is clear, "_ he shouted, waking a few squad members up. _" Get ready, we leave in two! "_

Peeta took the opportunity he was given and got up, taking his backpack, then crossbow and guns. He felt Katniss' eyes in his back, but didn't turn around. Finnick came in running, joining him as he entered the wagon. One feet in, and the younger blond immediately felt caged. These trains held bad memories only.

_" Hey, let's seat over here, "_ Finnick declared, pointing at the sofa at the end of the wagon. _" This way we'll see the outside. "  
_His friend followed silently, and settled his belongings on the floor, _" Don't you feel trapped too? "_

The older boy froze while putting his trident down next to him, understanding what Peeta meant by this simple question.

_" I-I don't really know, "_ he stuttered, staring at his bandaged hands.  
Peeta gave him a shrug, _" It's kinda depressing, "_ he breathed out, sliding his fingertips over the soft fabric of the furniture.  
_" This feeling sorta gets softer if you think about our goal, "_ Finnick stated in a calm voice.

His friend wanted to see the silver lining of the story, he was trying his best not to be pessimistic. But their mission had so much importance that every single move he made felt too difficult to handle, too fragile. Katniss appeared in the doorframe, and walked towards the pair, her bow in hands.

_" I'm going to talk to Gale, " _she declared, out of nowhere. _" And we'll have a conversation once it's done. "_

She left, as fast as she came in.

Finnick looked at Peeta, curving a questioning eyebrow, _" What was that about? "  
_The younger boy sighed, _" We were reading Prim's notes just a minute ago, "_ he started, relaxing on the couch. _" She doesn't remember about a conversation we had before the Games, "_ he continued, looking up at the ceiling. _" It wasn't recorded. Or at least, they didn't show it on television. "  
_Finnick frowned, " Which means, " he breathed out, cutting his friend. _" That Snow would do anything to break the bond you created. "_

Peeta nodded, closed his eyes. He had no idea about what she had endured, but this single information revealed many things. Katniss was giving him a second chance, but she was still struggling, and that was a thing he wanted to help her with.

The taller blond looked up, _" But we already knew that… " _he sighed.  
_" To which extent does this man crave power? " _Peeta exhaled.  
Finnick settled a hand on his shoulder, _" To madness, inhumanity, " _he said. _" The list is sadly long. "  
__" I wish I could know about what they did to her, "_ his friend groaned. _" But there's no way I'm talking about this with her, "_ he added, shaking his head. _" I don't want her to remember this. "  
__" Maybe she will tell you about it without you needing to ask anything, " _Finnick stated.

The younger boy didn't feel the need to reply anything. He stretched his legs, sore from all the sitting, and let out a lazy yawn. After a few minutes, they realized the train was moving, as the scenery moved past their eyes, so fast it gave Peeta a headache.

**/**

_" I'm sorry you don't appreciate me getting to know Peeta again, " _Katniss sighed. _" But I feel like I have to do it, " _she continued, getting more comfortable on the bed they were sitting on. _" More than having to, I need to do it. "  
_Her best friend frowned slightly, eyes full of some sort of sadness, _" That doesn't surprise me, " _he stated. _" It just happened really fast, I didn't see it coming. "  
__" I didn't either, " _the girl assured him. _" But I start to think that he's a nice person, " _she added in a breath, lowering herself on the mattress. _" Since Haymitch and I talked, I start to see shades in the grey. "_

A sigh escaped her mouth, and she shut her eyes closed, trying to push her doubts about Peeta away. In some moments, she felt secure in his presence, but she still feared getting close to him, feared to be hurt once more. It was all very confusing, and her best friend's reticence didn't help at all. She wished he could support her in this new dynamic.

_" Yeah, I saw that, " _Gale stated.  
She opened her eyes, finding his gaze, _" I apologize if it hurt you in some way, " _she told him, her voice starting to tremble. _" But, " _she blurted out, a bit too loud. _" But, that doesn't mean you're not important to me. "  
_He laughed, rolling his eyes, _" I know that Catnip, " _he said.

Katniss had no idea how to respond to Gale's feelings. She loved him, she really did, but she couldn't even explain in which way.

_" It was just a hug, " _she felt the need to add.  
Her best friend smiled, _" I think it was more than that, " _he replied, sounding resigned, accepting.  
Grey eyes flinched, _" You don't know that, " _she bit back.

Silence settled, filling every open space around and between them. Katniss felt kinda uncomfortable, having this conversation with him, but it was sorta necessary.

_" But it was, " _he insisted. _" You held him as if you were never going to leave him, or see him ever again, " _he stated, looking down at the bed. _" Maybe both. "  
_She turned on her side, to face him, _" It was the first time I saw him again, " _she mumbled.  
_" What is that even supposed to mean? " _Gale sighed, moving on the bed, his back finding the wall.

Katniss had the answer in her mind, but somehow, words were stuck in her throat. She felt as if sentences couldn't describe the sensation appropriately.

_" You were there, I treated him like shit when you rescued us, " _she said. _" But that day, I-I… " _she stuttered, her voice breaking.

She hid her face in her hands, bit her cheeks, as tears urging to leave burned her eyes. Nothing in the world could affect her emotions like Peeta Mellark did, and she didn't know why.

_" Hey, it's okay, " _Gale whispered, putting a hand on her forehead. _" We don't have to talk about this if you can't. "  
_Katniss shook her head, _" No, I, " _she blurted out in a wail. _" I just can't, " _she moaned. _" I can't be away from him, and I don't know why. "  
_Gale shook his head, _" It's fine, you don't have to know why. "_

He rubbed her skull gently, massaged her temples with his calloused thumbs as she whimpered, tears finding the covers of the bed. She couldn't stop crying, refused to be so dependent to someone she wasn't sure she knew. They were at war, and she couldn't afford these emotions. Still, they overflowed, turning her into a sobbing mess.

**/**

Peeta and Finnick had stopped talking as the younger boy had fallen asleep again, his head on top of the couch. The trip to District 2's station was almost over, barely half an hour left. Finnick was thinking about his wife, back in District 13, about how worried she most likely was.

_" Excuse me, this took more time than I expected, " _Katniss sighed as she sat next to the sleeping Peeta. _" I guess I shouldn't wake him up. "  
_Finnick smiled, gave a nod, _" That conversation can wait, " _he agreed.  
She looked down at the smaller blond, _" I'm sure he didn't get to sleep a lot in 13, " _she whispered, giving his hair a stroke. _" He always cared too much. "  
_The boy sighed, _" Yeah, he had some rough times, " _he stated. _" He lost his family, and was told you were dead, " _he added in a breath.

Katniss's chewed on her bottom lip, her swollen and reddened eyes narrowing in concern. She had been so hostile when he had been presumed dead, then alive. Even thought she wished he didn't see her interviews, she knew he obviously did.

_" I know how that feels, " _she whispered, her voice waving with emotion.  
Finnick tilted his head to the side, _" He thought he lost the most important people in his life, " _he specified. _" There's nothing worse than that in the world. "_

Her thin fingers glided through his hair, and he moaned in his sleep, orienting his head to the side. She slid her hand down his neck where she gently rubbed his warm skin. This boy was good at hiding his inner pain and insecurities, because it didn't show at all on his face.

_" I wish I could remember everything, " _she breathed out. _" From my own point of view. "  
_The blond smiled, _" One day you will, maybe, " _he reassured her, bowing his head as he watched her hand. _" But he doesn't need you to do that, you know. "  
_Katniss straightened up, her fingers freezing, _" W-What do you mean? "  
__" I'm not saying he wouldn't like that, " _Finnick explained. _" But he will still love you if you can't do it. "_

The word love knocked Katniss off her feet, and her whole body softened, her shoulders relaxing instantly. Peeta never mentioned this, not that she remembered, but hearing it made a shiver run down her spine. It was unsettling, she had no idea how to respond to this four letter word.

_" I-I… " _she blurted out.

She pinched her lips together, staring at the sleeping boy, her hand trembling against his warm skin. Her head started moving back and forth unconsciously. She wanted to scream, to hide somewhere in the woods. Love wasn't a feeling she could afford, not in this world.

_" Hey, just breathe. "_

Finnick's voice came out of nowhere, making her realize how uneven her breathing was. Air tasted thicker than usual, and the train suddenly felt too narrow for her liking. Grey eyes opened as sheer panic crawled in her veins, tensing up her every muscle. Peeta groaned beside her, eyes fluttering open.

His voice was sleepy, hoarse when he spoke, _" Katniss? " _

Fingers refused to move away from the back of his neck as her mouth started shaking. She didn't want to be terrified of something that couldn't be grabbed, of a word. But it held such importance, such a threat.

_" Katniss? " _Peeta repeated, regaining a sitting position.

She shook her head vividly, her hand falling flat on the couch, attempting to grab the material of the sofa. Gasping desperately for air, she shut her eyes, forcing them close as she rocked her body back and forth. Peeta raised a hand, and she jolted back in surprise as it settled on her shoulder. His voice kept calling her name, but she couldn't reply, her throat tightening, lungs desperately gasping for oxygen. Tears of frustration leaked down her cheeks and she found herself trapped in a warm embrace.

_" What's wrong? " _the boy's voice asked right in her ear.  
She shuddered, _" N-no, " _she begged.  
_" It's okay, " _he whispered, hands caressing the top of her head. _" It's okay. "_

She gritted her teeth, her arms reaching out for Peeta's chest. Her fingers grabbed his uniform, and she pulled him closer, sinking her face in his neck. Craving for somebody's presence, existence, was unexpectedly scary. He held her tighter to stop the trembling, murmuring comforting words to make her relax.

_" I can't do it, " _she wailed.

Finnick stared at them, his mouth half opened, incapable of initiating a single movement or syllable.

_" I can't lose you, " _she cried out.

Peeta wasn't expecting anything, but this even less. Katniss looked up at him, eyes reddened and swollen, and he felt all his own doubts evaporate into nothingness. She bit the inside of her cheeks, and without any warning, crushed her lips against his, still whining. The boy's eyes opened widely for a moment before he gave in, his hands climbing her back and finding the nape of her neck. Katniss moaned desperately, fingers sinking in Peeta's cheeks. The pressure of her mouth on his got stronger, finding the same intensity as Peeta kissed her back, his lips following hers relentlessly.

She pulled back, _" Sorry, " _she mewled.

He had no idea about what she was apologizing for. Right in that moment, there was no way for him to form a single thought, even the most basic one. He wasn't moving, couldn't move as he stared at her right in the eyes. Never had he experienced something this intense in his whole life. Compared to this, the kiss they shared on the beach seemed to be a faint representation of what passion and devotion really meant.

_" You've calmed down, " _Finnick stated, laughing nervously, nodding to himself.

Katniss kept her forehead stuck to Peeta's, eyes shut tightly and fingers dragging in the tender skin of his cheeks. Her teeth were chattering nervously as the boy gently, but firmly, rubbed her arms, inhaling and exhaling loudly through his nose. She couldn't allow herself to feel something for him, because it made her weak, added some burden on her thin shoulders. It scared her, having this someone' existence set her life's tempo, giving it most of its meaning.

_" I can't do it, " _she repeated, her voice waving with emotion.

She pushed the boy away very carefully, the tip of her fingers trembling. When she looked at him, his blue eyes reflected the depth of his feelings, and her own fear. It didn't suit him, to look this sad, and she wished he could start smiling instead of worrying. She lifted a hand and settled it on the edge of his mouth, sliding her thumb over his slightly chapped lips.

_" Katniss? "_

What she felt for this boy wasn't love, it was something different, unbelievable longing and caring. But could anyone really describe love? Her breathing had eased, allowing her to pant heavily and let her lungs get filled.

Peeta didn't say anything more, and stared at her, waiting for her to express herself first. He was afraid he could shed this moment to pieces if he spoke.

_" I'm really sorry, " _she uttered in a breath. _" I can't, not just now, " _she continued.

Peeta wished he could understand what this was all about, but he didn't. Something was obviously holding Katniss back, and he wished he could find it out without needing to ask.

_" I'd get weaker, " _she whispered. _" I'd be easier to reach, " _she added.

With these simple words, he knew.

He shook his head slowly, _" Don't worry, it's fine, " _he reassured her.

Peeta had been waiting for years, for an eternity to get closer to Katniss. He could wait for a week or two, even for a decade, a century. She wasn't willing to expose herself with emotional attachments, and that was the wisest decision in their situation. They were only a few minutes away from District 2's train station, and once they would set a foot off the wagon, death would await at every corner.

_" It really is, " _he confirmed her, fingers sliding from her cheek to her temple. _" I swear it is. "_

Katniss bit her bottom lip, and nodded, letting her head fall forward on his shoulder. Even thought she didn't realize it before because of the hatred she felt towards him, she could see how slimmer he had become. His broad muscles were stiff, but there was a lack of strength in his frame, an emptiness that brought an unsettling rush through her stomach. These arms that held her, and shielded her, from the severity of the life she had been forced to live -not that she remembered that part- had gotten not only slender, but almost sickly looking.  
When he tightened his embrace around her waist, she felt some reassurance, and perceived a soft familiarity. Closing her eyes, she buried her nose in his collar, inhaling his sent. It smelled like salt, cheap soap, and bitterness, even thought it didn't make any sense.

_" Are you feeling better? " _he asked, his voice serene and quiet.

She gave a shy nod, and gripped his uniform tighter over his shoulder blades, her fingers having a mind of their own, willing to tear the grey material off his back. Pulling on the cloth, she started blaming herself for kissing him so unexpectedly. It even surprised her, but her body had taken over her brain, and somewhere in her heart, she knew that nobody could have stopped it.

_" Soldiers, please change. We're close to our destination, " _Boggs stated.

His voice didn't make Katniss or Peeta flinch, not even a little bit. They were tangled in one another, finding some sort of sanctuary in their clasp. She didn't want to let go of him, scared this could be the last time. He didn't want to let her go, for the same reason.

_" Come on Miss Everdeen, it's time, " _Coin's secondhand insisted.

Slowly, she pulled back, fingers still holding the blond's uniform firmly, too stiff to loosen their grip just yet. Peeta gently stroked her neck with his index, smiling peacefully. Finally, she untied her arms, and got up, legs trembling under her weight. Almost instinctively, her hand found his, and she squeezed it, pinching her lips together, as his blue eyes seemed to speak a language of their own.  
And she understood every single word.

He finally dropped his arm, and she headed towards one of the bedrooms of the train to change.

Peeta suddenly noticed Finnick's absence, his trident still lying on the couch.

**/**

The train slowed down, the ridiculously big chandelier making a ticking sound that gave the blond another headache. Squad members gathered towards the exit of the wagon, Boggs standing right in front of the door, his shotgun in hand. Finnick weaved in and out to get to his friend, both wearing the black uniform people from District 13 had been working on for months. Peeta glanced down at the tiny pocket above his own shoulder, and swallowed with difficulty, finding his mouth unpleasantly dry. The pill that was hidden in it had been created by scientist in the underground district. Created to allow you to die if that was the only option left.

He quickly looked up as the train pulled onto the platform of District 2's station. The leader of the squad opened the door manually , and Peeta's heart skipped a few beats as his legs started to move on their own, leading him in the hangar.  
The first group was already heading towards the first shelter, and Coin's secondhand directed his teammates to form ranks, soldiers obeying without a word.

Finnick shook his friend's arm, _" We're in this together, remember? " _he asked, frowning seriously.  
Peeta nodded, _" I-I do, " _he stuttered.

Boggs started walking, taking cautious steps, leading the squad out of the empty building.  
Grey clouds filled the sky, traveling slowly over the soldiers' heads, absence of wind densifying the air, making it heavy, almost oppressive.

_" A storm's coming, " _Cressida stated, a rank behind the two ex-tributes. _" We should avoid the forest. "  
_Jackson heaved a sigh, _" In other words, we have to make a detour. "  
__" We'll bypass it from a close distance, " _Boggs stated. _" We can't lose time just now. "_

Finnick and Peeta shared a glance, and giggled nervously. They had spent a long time staring at the map, at the 'recommended route' inhabitants of 13 had drawn.

_" We'll never reach the shelter like the first squad, " _Finnick asserted. _" Let's just hope we'll reach some place that has sewers or some kind of roof. "  
_His friend gave a strong nod, his eyes glued to Katniss, _" That would be really convenient. "_

**/**

The second squad had reached the forest, but by that time, thunder had been striking regularly, forcing them to skirt the woods. Rain was pouring, heavy, unforgiving, warm and blinding, but Boggs wouldn't let the soldiers take a break.

_" Hold on for a bit longer! " _he yelled, to be heard. _" We have to make as much progress as we can! "_

None of the squad members refuted this statement, and kept jogging, their black boots covered in mud, slowing down their movements. Thankfully, their uniforms weren't sticking to their skin, lessening any friction. Peeta was tired, but didn't dare mentioning it, his shoe slipping off his prothesis, his vision blurred by rain. He had never looked away from Katniss, standing in the middle of the formation, from her soaked black hair.

The squad members were drenched, worn out when they reached some abandoned house. Most of them just sat wherever they were, feet hurting from hours of running. Peeta immediately removed his shoes, then settled them upside down on the ground, water dripping from it. Carefully, he removed his socks, and cringed when he couldn't even identify their color.

_" How are you holding up buddy? " _Finnick asked, panting as he removed the vest of his uniform. _" Your fake leg isn't making it easier, uh? "  
_Peeta looked away from his left sock, blinked repeatedly, _" I'm fine, " _he assured his friend. _" I'll just have to tie the laces tighter so the boot doesn't fall off. "_

Finnick gave him a small smile, and rubbed his hair firmly, cold water spattering around. That just made him giggle sorta childishly, and Peeta felt a bit warmer. He couldn't remember Finnick making a sound close to laughing so genuinely in the past, but it sure was a nice thing to hear.

_" I don't know about you, but I'm starving, " _Finnick stated, opening his backpack.  
Peeta nodded, _" Yeah, I'm hungry as well, " _he agreed. _" But first I want to put dry socks on. "_

**/**

Finnick ate a can of green bean, Peeta chose rice instead. The weather wasn't getting better outside, wind blowing strongly against the walls of the run down house they were in. The blond took a look at Katniss, eating her own portion with Gale, discussing calmly. She didn't ask him about what happened when they were reading earlier, and he was glad about it.

_" Hey Peeta, " _Finnick sighed.  
His friend jolted, _" Hm? What is it? "  
__" What Katniss and you did earlier, in the train, " _he started, staring at his metallic fork. _" What do you think it means for her? "_

The blond's eyes widened. Finnick had left during his encounter with the girl, and he wasn't sure he could really explain what happened. Not with words, for sure.

_" I think she did it without realizing she was, " _he replied, chewing his bite. _" She doesn't want to get involved in that sort of relationship, " _he continued. _" And I totally understand it. "  
_Finnick pouted for a moment, _" We're in constant danger, we could die at any moment, " _he mumbled. _" Isn't it the perfect moment to embrace that sort of things? " _he asked, probably to himself. _" I mean, you were rooting for Annie and me, even thought you knew I'd be leaving her for this mission. "_

Peeta's gaze dropped to the dirty ground, and he let out a shaky breath. Finnick was right indeed, these sort of situations usually pushed people towards one another, but Katniss was different. He was sure that she never really allowed herself to have feelings, that she kept burying them in order to protect herself. And with all that happened to her, around her, it was normal for her to be afraid of feelings. She wasn't as cold-hearted as she might seem, she wasn't as emotionless, she just learnt how to convince herself that this sort of things didn't matter. The only love she allowed herself to feel was the one provided by a family, be it blood-related or not, and Peeta could absolutely relate.

_" It's much more complex than that, " _he finally said. _" She has the ability to love, we both know that, " _he added. _" She just can't express it like everyone else. "  
_Finnick hummed to himself, _" I know what you mean, " _he sighed, running his free hand in his curvy hair. _" But she deserves to be able to really embrace her feelings. "  
__" The thing is, " _Peeta started, swallowing more rice. _" She isn't allowing herself to be in love, " _he stated._  
_His friend yawned, _" Somehow, I understand why she does that, " _he admitted. _" Even thought I got together with Annie again, I know it makes me more vulnerable. "_

Peeta settled down his can, closing it with some foil.

_" I'm as exposed as you are, " _he breathed out. _" Just because we can't express our feelings doesn't mean they're not here anymore. "_

Finnick frowned, contemplating his friend's sentence.

_" But Katniss can't trust me entirely, " _Peeta continued. _" And that carries weight, a lot of weight, " _he added, closing his eyes for a moment. _" Which is why I know she took the best decision, telling me that she couldn't. "  
_Finnick took his fork out of the can, _" Couldn't what exactly? " _he asked.  
_" Be with anyone, especially me, " _Peeta stated as if it was obvious. _" Not yet. "_

* * *

**NDA : **Here is the 36th chapter!

I'm sorry I'm late, but I lost inspiration halfway, and I had been busy preparing several exams.  
I'm kinda liking this one, and I hope you enjoyed reading it.

See you in chapter 37,  
bisous, :)


	37. Chapter 37 : He saved me ?

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 37: He saved me?**

Finnick pouted, but eventually gave a nod. What Katniss was doing made sense after all, she wouldn't jump into any relationship blindfolded to avoid hurting anyone, including herself. He put his fork back in his backpack, and took a water bottle out of it, opening it and taking big sips from it.

_" Do you think Boggs will make us run with that storm starting outside? " _he asked Peeta.  
His friend shrugged, _" Maybe, "_ he sighed. _" We have to make progress, our goal is really far away, "_ he continued. _" If rain stops us, this part that's supposed to be quick and easy will take forever. "  
_Finnick tilted his head to the side, _" I guess you're right, "_ he agreed.

Peeta drank some water as well, then put his shoes back on, lacing them tighter so they wouldn't fall off. The inside were still soaked, but he didn't mind.

Katniss was staring right at him when he looked up.

He couldn't look away, her grey eyes darker than usual. And Peeta wondered what she was thinking about.

She didn't move, didn't even blink, but eventually her stare fell to his mouth. The boy wetted his lips by habit, wriggling on the ground.

They shared a silent dialog that nobody dared to disturb, eyes more expressive than simple words.

_" Soldiers, let's move on! "_ Boggs shouted. _" We have to get going! "_

The blond shook his head multiple times.

Finnick got up by his side, and he grabbed his own bag, along with his weapons. His real leg was feeling numb, and he growled in his throat, mumbled under his breath.

He joined the rest of the squad with his friend, right behind Coin's secondhand. They waited for further instructions, closing their jackets, knowing the storm was still going strong.

They stepped out of the building, rain thick and unforgiving, plugging their vision, blurring it.

Boggs established a steady rhythm, wanting to reach the first marked shelter by nightfall. With the workaround, they lost a precious hour, lengthened their journey to the core of district 2.

**/**

The squad was finally getting closer to the quarries, symbolism of the District's speciality, and of the District's real demarcation.

Soldiers were tired, wet again, and wished they could finally see the walls of the city.

_" We'll go through the quarries, it's a shortcut, "_ Coin's secondhand explained. _" Perhaps you should film as we walk, Cressida. "_

Katniss herself curved an eyebrow at that instruction.

The blond woman nodded, _" Yeah, "_ she replied._ " Pollux, you heard him, "_ she told her co-worker.

Peeta didn't know many things about that woman, except that she was a talented film director, originating from the Capitol itself. A part of her crew was present as well, including Messalla, Pollux and Castor. He remembered hearing about Pollux's story, how they cut his tongue, and why it made Cressida change her political position.

Peeta was glad people could realize how wrong the situation was in Panem, even people living with ease.

But he still disagreed on the whole filming situation, convinced it would make their journey even tougher.

_" Let's slow down a bit, "_ Boggs ordered, motioning to the ground with his palm. _" I think we'll reach the town in a couple hours, "_ he added._ " So we can take some time to film Katniss. "_

Cressida helped her teammates with their gears, fastening their helmets and checking the batteries.

Katniss was soaked, her hair already wet, but Boggs seemed really eager to record this sequence for some reason.

_" You don't have to say anything, "_ Cressida told Katniss. _" Just walk through, with the rest of the squad. "_

She placed Pollux in the center of the quarries, Messalla by her side and Castor right behind Katniss, to film her back.

_" We're rolling, "_ Cressida stated.

They started walking in formation, jogging with the wind blowing in their ears, freezing their noses, hands and feet.

Finnick and Peeta found the situation extremely strange, stopping to capture some footages of the mockingjay when they were fighting a race against time. Katniss looked rather comfortable, simply following the leader's steps and not focusing on the cameras.

After two long minutes, the film director nodded,_ " Cut! " _she announced.

Boggs waited for rest of the crew to put their equipment back in their bags quite impatiently, checking their surroundings suspiciously.

They were totally exposed, and Coin's secondhand couldn't help but worry about getting spotted. He shot anxious looks at the blonde woman, waiting for her team to finish packing.

_" That's a wrap, "_ she stated, pulling on the shoulder straps of her backpack.  
The squad leader clapped his hands once, _" Let's go soldiers, we have to catch up! "_

Peeta still didn't understand why making a short footage of them in District 2's quarries held such importance in that moment.

The storm seemed too strong to disappear by sunset, the first shelter was hours away, but yet, they took the time to film Katniss.

_" Come on, we've lost a lot of time today, " _Boggs insisted, running towards the borderline of the District.

Finnick let out an heavy sigh, rolled his eyes in annoyance but did not voice his opinion. President Coin apparently had a very specific plan regarding this mission, and wasn't willing to let anybody alter it.

Rain seemed to find its way inside the soldiers' coats, chilling them to the bones, making their teeth chatter wildly. Their skin turned a bit purple, blue, from the coldness.

They ran in never-ending puddles, sometimes two and a half inches deep, drowning their boots. Nobody complained. None of the soldiers, and none of the members of the filming crew.

In the late afternoon, the sky turned into a dark grey, with touches of brown and purple. The sun was falling down, depriving the dozen of rebels of its warmth, disappearing behind heavy clouds.

By nightfall, they were nowhere close to the first shelter, where Paylor and her group arrived a few minutes earlier. It forced them to settle on another place.

_" The sewers are the best option we have, " _Katniss stated, running a hand on her wet face, wiping the rain away.  
Boggs shook his head, frowning, _" The President told me we should rather find a dark alley, somewhere near the market place, "_ he replied. _" Beetee is sending the coordinates to the Holo. "  
_The black-haired girl looked up at the sky, blinking the rain away, _" Is it really safe to stay in the open? "  
__" We will follow Coin's orders, "_ the man retorted simply.

The discussion ended there, and Boggs guided the squad through the borders of the city. It didn't make their itinerary longer, located close to their standard route. During the journey, he gave the soldiers their order of watch for the night, told them they'd have to leave before sunrise.

Once they reached their goal for the day, every soldier was exhausted, could barely walk. Tents were installed on the bare ground, sleeping bag lazily laid inside them.

_" Who's sharing Katniss' tent? " _Finnick asked, taking off the vest of his uniform.  
Peeta shuddered vaguely, massaging his tibias, _" I don't know, probably Gale. "_

Both boys were too tired to hold a real conversation, so they just changed and slid in their sleeping bags.

Peeta felt as if his legs were buzzing lightly, sore from running so much. His eyelids soon got too heavy for him to resist the need to drift into sleep.

**/**

He woke up sweating, gasping desperately for air, surprised by the violence of his nightmare.

Finnick got on his elbows, rubbing his eyes,_ " Hey, you alright? "_ he mumbled.

His friend didn't answer, focusing on his breathing, lungs burning from the lack of oxygen.

It had been a while since his last bad dream, but it still ended the same way. Katniss closing her hands around his neck and suffocating him. It seemed so real that he couldn't relax his throat to let some fresh air in.

He sat up, checking his bracelet for the time. He gestured vaguely to his friend and put his uniform on, trembling from head to toes.

_" Is it already time for your watch? "_ Finnick asked, eyes fluttering close.  
Peeta nodded,_ " Yes, "_ he managed to articulate in a gasp.

A few minutes were necessary for him to be able to stand up.

Before he left the tent, he grabbed his crossbow, and told his friend to go back to sleep.

It wasn't raining anymore, but the coldness was worse than during the day. Peeta shivered as he made his way through the tents, teeth chattering noisily. He stopped by the end of the alley and inhaled deeply through his nose, eyes falling shut.

There was no reason for him to look into his nightmare too much, what he needed was some calm.

_" I thought you were going to let me guard alone, "_ a feminine voice sighed in the blond's back._ " You're late. "_

He pivoted on his heels, losing his balance in the process, switching from his fake to his real leg to gain some control again. It was Katniss, he knew it, but his vision was blurry. All he could see was her silhouette, the bow in her right hand.

_" Sorry, "_ he muttered, frowning.  
She took a couple steps forward,_ " Are you okay? "_

A hand settled on his shoulder, and Peeta jolted in surprise, his body leaning towards her unconsciously. Her fingers closed around him, and she squeezed slightly, waiting for an answer.

He shook his head, _" I-I don't know, "_ he mumbled. _" Had a bad dream. "  
__" You want to talk about it? "_ she suggested. _" It might help. "  
_Peeta groaned, feeling dizzy,_ " I'm not sure it will, "_ he told her, shaking his head.

He regretted that action immediately, and held a hand to his pounding temple.

Katniss didn't insist, and Peeta mirrored her, a hand climbing on her shoulder. She didn't question this movement, fingers massaging him unconsciously.

_" Was it that bad? "_ she asked, her voice gentle and soft.  
He looked up at her, found her concerned stare,_ " It was, "_ he uttered in a breath.

Slowly, he let his hand slide off the place where it was anchored, and he took a better hold around his crossbow. He didn't want to tell her about his nightmare, it would only make things worse, he was sure about it. So he was relieved when she didn't question him about that subject.

They stood side by side, staring at some pigeons eating off some bread on the wet ground. Peeta was finally breathing normally, but he still felt as if there was some sort of rope around his neck, pushing on his throat. It was an uncomfortable sensation, and there seemed to be no way to get rid of it.

_" Feeling better? "_

He shot the brunette a sight glance, and gave her a slight nod of approval.

Coldness forced the blond to walk in circles around their camp, between the tents and along the white houses surrounding it.

A sewer would've been a better option, would've let them all have a full night, and he mentally blamed Coin for her choice.

_" How is Finnick doing? "_

Peeta turned around and looked at Katniss from where he was, _" I guess he's doing fine, "_ he stated._ " Tired and nervous like the rest of us, "_ he added. _" You should ask him directly. "  
_She smiled, and sat down, her bow on her lap,_ " You're right, I will, "_ she agreed.

Another dozen of minutes passed, and they didn't say a thing, silently waiting for their watch to end.

The boy finally joined her, sitting on her right, his back against the rough stone of a house.

_" I'm sorry, "_ he sighed, out of nowhere.

He had no idea what he was talking about, the words slipping out of his mouth without his consent.

_" About what? "_ Katniss asked. _" You have nothing to apologize for. "  
_Peeta hummed to himself, _" I'm not sure why, I felt like I had to say it, "_ he explained. _" Probably. "  
__" We probably won't get out of this mission alive, "_ Katniss stated._ " There is no room for regrets, Peeta, "_ she continued.

There was a hundred things he wanted to talk about now, a thousand things he wished he could say. But it got stuck somewhere, and he stood there, muscles tensing up. He didn't know what he was afraid of, but it paralyzed him.

_" You know, I still have some doubts, " _Katniss blurted out. _" About you, I mean. "_

Peeta inhaled in a sharp breath, turned his head so he could face her. Distant noises came from the inside of the city, kilometers away, but he made his ears buzz.

_" I figured that I would think about them once we're back home, "_ she continued, staring down at her hands.

The blond's eyes widened, and his mouth opened. A strangled moan passed past his lips. She believed they could both survive this hell, and he wasn't sure how it made him feel.

Katniss shifted, her body closer to his, _" While we're out here, I want to forget these questions, " _she told him._ " And if there's a little chance for us to be alive at the end, then we'll talk. "_

Her right hand lost its grip around her weapon, settled on top of Peeta's. All he could do was stare at it, his mouth closing.

_" For now, "_ Katniss said in a breath,_ " I want this. "_

The palm of her hand was surprisingly hot against the top of his. Fingers gently slid through the empty spaces between Peeta's, and she held his hand strongly.

_" It's fine by me, "_ he managed to answer.

Her whole body relaxed, and her head found his shoulder, hair tickling the boy's skin. A shudder traveled from the bottom of his spine to his neck, and he sighed, feeling at ease.

It almost felt as if they weren't going to face a war.

**/**

At some point, they both got back on their feet, walked side by side aimlessly in the dark alley.

Their breaths were warm, forming a nice fog when they expired. Hands were turning slightly purple, and they rubbed them.

_" Only half an hour left, " _Katniss stated.  
Peeta shivered, nodded, _" Yeah, I'm glad, "_ he replied. _" Not that I don't enjoy being around you, but I'm freezing. "_

The girl laughed, punched his shoulder playfully.

_" There's no need for you to make excuses, "_ she mocked him.

Peeta smiled, and let out a shaky laughter, scratching the back of his neck. He felt like a ball of awkwardness, but the good kind.

He calmed down, _" It's so quiet, it seems so unreal, "_ he sighed.

Katniss gave him a strange look, but deep inside, she understood how he felt.

_" We should enjoy it, it won't last. "_

She wanted him to be closer. He did too. But none of them mentioned it.

After a few minutes, Katniss gave in, and sat back at the spot they were earlier, _" Come here, "_ she gently told him.

Peeta couldn't hold back the smile growing on his face while he took place next to her.

She looked at him. From his red hands to his blue eyes that looked almost black in the dark. She remembered the night in the cave, the one in the tributes' center, but informations were messy and missing in her mind.

It still felt oddly normal when she settled her head on his lap.

_" Is that bothering you? " _she asked.  
He shook his head slightly, _" No, but you're not exactly being effective as a guard, "_ he teased her.

She rolled her eyes, unable to contain a giggle.

_" You said it was quiet, "_ she simply said.

Peeta had to repress a sudden urge, sudden need, to run a hand in her black hair.

_" You did that before, "_ he told her. _" Once, " _he added.

Katniss stopped looking at the clouds, and found Peeta staring back at her. The look on his face didn't reveal anything about what he was thinking. Not at all.

_" I can't remember doing that, "_ she admitted. _" How was it? "_

She could have asked when it was instead, but no. Peeta felt something tingle inside of his stomach, and he shivered slightly.

_" How it was? "_ he reformulated.

He stared in front of him, let his eyes fall close for a while.

_" We spent our day on the roof of the tributes' center, "_ he whispered, eyes still shut. _" We both wanted to be on our own, before the Quell. "_

Katniss hummed, her gaze dropping to his mouth for a second.

_" You fell asleep with your head on my lap, " _he continued. _" I woke you so you could see the sunset. "  
_She moved her head around, getting more comfortable,_ " Why? "_

Peeta smiled to himself, looked down at Katniss as he opened his eyes.

_" I didn't want you to miss such a colorful sky, "_ he replied. _" It was so beautiful. "_

She nodded vaguely, eyes switching to the clouds again.

_" I… "_, she blurted out. "_ I can't even remember it, that's a shame. "  
_Peeta looked away from her, _" That's no big deal Katniss, "_ he reassured her. _" Really. "_

Her hands moved her jacket up her neck, a vicious breeze sliding beneath the fabric.

_" Are you cold? "_

She shrugged, arms closing around her flat belly.

Peeta chuckled, _" You definitely are. "  
__" It's fine, "_ Katniss assured him. _" Our watch is almost over, I can handle it. "_

His left hand reached out, to touch her hair, probably. He stopped, not willing to do something she didn't want.

_" It's fine, "_ Katniss repeated.  
The boy swallowed with difficulty, _" What is? "_

She held out a trembling hand, grabbed his.

_" This. "_

They stared at each other, some birds chirping in the distance.

Peeta wrapped her hand between his, and pulled it towards his mouth. He blew on it, never breaking their eye contact.

And the world seemed to stop turning for a couple minutes.

**/**

Peeta was about to crawl back in his tent, but Katniss took his wrist, pulled gently on it.

_" Do you need something? "_ he asked.

She shook her head, pulled him closer and wrapped her arms around him, locking him in a tight hug. His eyes closed on their own, and he inhaled deeply.

_" I think I needed that too, "_ he sighed. _" Thank you Katniss. "_

Their embrace lingered, and Peeta's fingers crawled up her back, found her neck where they rubbed her cold skin.

She trembled lightly in his hold, drowned her face in his shoulder.

_" We're ready, you can go back to sleep, "_ Leeg 2 announced. _" Oh-Hum, sorry. "_

They didn't let go for another ten minutes. They didn't care about their watch being over, about how cold they both were.

**/**

Finnick groaned when Peeta opened the fly of the tent, a fresh breeze entering the cocoon his body heat had created. He pulled his sleeping bag up his neck, curled up on his side.

_" Sorry buddy, "_ Peeta whispered, making room for himself.

His hands got warmer in a short time and he sighed in relief.

His friend groaned and sat up, rubbing his tired eyes, _" Did it go well? "  
_Peeta gave a nod, _" Yeah, nobody in town, "_ he replied, taking off his jacket.

Finnick reached for his backpack and grabbed a water bottle, drank from it.

_" Katniss asked me how you were doing, "_ Peeta added.  
The blond by his side settled down his bottle, _" Oh yeah? What did you tell her? "  
__" That you seemed fine, that she should ask you directly, "_ Peeta answered.

His friend nodded, pouting.

_" I don't think she would've come by herself if you didn't suggest it, "_ he sighed. _" We've never been close. "_

And that was the reason he in fact told her to do so.

Peeta unknotted his shoelaces, kicked off his boots, _" I think she cares about you. "  
_Finnick laughed, _" Believe me, she doesn't need somebody else to worry about. "_

His friend found no response, slid in his sleeping bag instead.

**/**

Inside her tent, Katniss was reading her sister's notebook, Gale snoring by her side.

" I knew Katniss would make it, I knew it but still, I'm glad, so glad, so, so glad. Peeta was willing to die to let her win the Games, but she refused categorically.  
There is this strange connection between the two of them, quiet and invisible, but it's there, I feel it. They are both refusing to see the other die, and I think it's because they can't think that living would be possible without the other. I'm still convinced that it's related to that time Peeta threw Katniss the bread. I'm sure it is. "

She stared at this passage, read it an additional time, then another. If Prim said that, thought that, it had to be true.

Katniss couldn't imagine her sister lying about such things.

If there was a thing she remembered, it was the day Peeta Mellark threw her loafs of bread.

She could still feel how soaked her sweater was, how hollow her stomach was. Above it all, she could still see Peeta's cheek reddening after his mother hit him. How he shot her a glance, then decided to give her some burned bread instead of giving it to the porks.

_" He saved my family, "_ she whispered to herself. _" He saved me**?** "_

This single information, affirmation, unsettled her. She wanted to trust this boy, felt like she could.

But it was so scary.

It felt like she meant a lot to Peeta. But it wasn't enough, not yet.

She kept reading for a moment, hearing Leeg 1 and Leeg 2 conversing outside of her tent.

**/**

Peeta felt someone shake him around, and he growled, rolling on his back.

_" We have to leave, "_ Finnick told him. _" Come on buddy. "_

The blond lazily opened his eyes, his stomach grumbling.

_" That's right, let's eat first, "_ Finnick said, smiling.  
Peeta stretched his legs and arms, _" I should've removed my earpiece, "_ he mumbled.

His friend burst out in laughter, shaking his head as he opened his bag. He pulled out a can of apple sauce, along with a plastic spoon.

_" You'll break it if you forget it, "_ Finnick told his friend.

He nodded it off.

They decided to share the can, since it couldn't be closed again.

Finnick opened the tent, stared at the sky, _" I think we should hurry, sun's coming up. "_

**/**

Ten minutes later, the squad members were refolding their tents, Boggs checking the street.

_" We have to reach the shelter before work hours, "_ he explained._ " We'll have a change of clothes, some sort of capes to cover our backpacks and weapons. "_

Nobody questioned this order.

_" Luckily the weather's on our side today, "_ he added, smiling.

He opened the Holo, programed it while the soldiers finished packing.

Peeta stared at Katniss, already done. Finnick kicked him playfully in the ribs with his elbow.

_" Always on your mind, uh? "_

The smaller blond shrugged, putting his shotgun back in his belt.

_" Try to hide your guns for now, "_ Boggs said, out of nowhere._ " We don't want any citizen to pay attention to us. "_

Finnick eyed his trident, and retracted it, pushing the only button on it.

Peeta curved an eyebrow, _" I didn't know you could do that, "_ he stated, a bit in awe.  
_" Beetee said he added it in the last minute, "_ Finnick explained. "_ He said it could be useful. "_

Then, he put it in his backpack, a small part of the handle still apparent. It still looked more casual then when he held it in his hands.

_" There shouldn't be any traps in this District, according to the Holo, "_ Boggs stated in a sigh. _" Let's move on. "_

The soldiers followed their leader, jogging faster than the previous day, the sole of their feet still painful.

Thankfully, they reached the shelter a short hour later.

Boggs gave two knocks on the front door, and a short man opened it. He was short, but had broad shoulders, like most people working in the stone factory.

_" Your team mates left around 5 this morning, "_ the man told them. _" You should stay here until 10 or 11, most people will be working. "_

Coin's secondhand started discussing with him, wanting to know if the Capitol had made any special announcement since their departure.

A woman walked in the living room,_ " If you need anything, "_ she said. _" Water, more cans of food, I'll be in the kitchen. " _

She quietly walked away, blond bangs hiding her eyes from the soldiers.

Her husband smiled, " You can rest anywhere, even upstairs if you're willing to take a nap. "

Boggs thanked him, but said that they all just woke up one or two hours ago.

_" Let's seat buddy, "_ Finnick said, pointing to a sofa.

Peeta nodded and followed his friend's steps and took place next to him.

He let out a sigh, checked his prothesis just in case. Katniss' eyes widened from across the room, and Finnick grabbed Peeta's forearm.

_" W-What? "_ the smaller blond asked, surprised.

Finnick didn't talk, but motioned to the girl with his chin.

_" Oh my, " _Peeta breathed out. _" Oh my god. "_

He jumped on his feet and reached for her, his hands cupping her face gently. Calm, calloused fingers caressed her cheeks, jaw, forehead patiently.

_" What's wrong Katniss? "_ he asked, in a soft tone. _" Tell me. "_

She was trembling, her hands paralyzed by something. It didn't look as if she could articulate a single word.

_" I think she's in shock, "_ Finnick told his friend, setting his hands on his shoulders.

Katniss managed to relax an arm a little bit, and put the palm of her hand on Peeta's fake leg. She let out a high pitch moan when she felt the fabric underneath the uniform.

_" Hey, it's okay, "_ Peeta assured her._ " It doesn't hurt, and I can still walk and run. "_

The boy did not expect that. He was sure she would remember this information above all the others. But she didn't.

Her fingers wouldn't let go of his left leg, the false one, and Peeta gave her some time to calm down.

_" I promise Katniss, it's okay_, " he repeated. _" It doesn't hurt. "_

He rubbed her back and shoulders gently, whispered some reassuring words, waiting for the panic attack to disappear.

_" Ho-How did this happen? "_ she asked, sobbing. _" How? "  
_Peeta inhaled deeply,_ " During our first Games, I was injured. "_

Grey eyes narrowed in concern, and she reached out for his face.

_" Was it my fault? " _she asked, her voice shakier than before. _" W-Was it? " _

The boy smiled, shook his head slowly.

_" It is your fault I am alive Katniss, " _he replied.

* * *

**NDA : I'm extremely late, and immensely sorry. I've been in Holland for 4 days, and studied a lot for my exams, so I didn't get to write a lot.**

**I hope you enjoyed this new chapter guys.  
****Thanks for reading me,**

**Bisous. **


	38. Chapter 38: What is there's no bad guys?

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 38 : What if there's no bad guys?**

It took Peeta close to ten minutes to make Katniss let go of his leg.

The brunette was trembling, and she stared at her hand, the one that held his prothesis before.

_" I-I didn't know, "_ she blurted out in a strangled voice. _" I'm so sorry. "_

The blond massaged her shoulders, his eyes staring into hers intensely.

_" I told you, "_ he reassured her. _" You're the reason I'm here today. "_

She nodded vaguely, grabbed his arms.

_" How did this happen? "_ she asked, unsure.

Peeta scooted closer, _" It's a long story, perhaps Primrose wrote something about it. "_

Katniss shook her head negatively.

_" I don't know, I only read the pages next to your drawings, "_ she admitted. _" It's easier for me this way. "_

The blond had made sure he didn't look at the pages the girl didn't mark, for confidentiality, so he ignored if Prim actually wrote about his wound. She never mentioned it in the parts he read.

_" Ca-Can you please tell me the story behind it? "_ Katniss asked.

He stopped massaging her, and let his fingers roam over her neck gently.

_" You trapped the Careers, and myself, with a tracker jacker nest, which fell and seriously bruised them, "_ he started. _" It killed Glimmer as well. "_

She gave a nod, biting her bottom lip with strength.

_" I-I do remember that, "_ she uttered in a breath.

She looked lost for a moment, her gaze dropping to the ground.

_" It was Rue's idea, " _she whispered with an undeniable sort of regret in her voice._ " I got bitten too. "_

Peeta smiled, rubbed the nape of her neck in what he wanted to be a comforting way.

_" You hurt yourself when you fell down the tree, and I knew the rest of the Careers would want to get rid of you, "_ he continued, calmly.

Katniss gave a slight nod.

_" I got Cato's attention, but he cut my thigh with his sword before I had a chance to run away, "_ he added.

Her bottom lip trembled, her whole body jolting simultaneously.

Finnick moved away quietly, finding Gale staring at the other two.

_" What happened? "_ Katniss' best friend asked, curving an eyebrow.

The blond bit the inside of his cheeks for a moment, frowning.

_" Katniss didn't remember that Peeta lost his leg, "_ he explained. _" She's quite shocked. "_

Gale hummed to himself, _" Is that so. "_

Peeta let his fingers softly massage the girl's temples, wanting to calm her.

_" A-And… How did you survive after that? "_ she asked.

He froze, remembering the struggle he had been through.

_" I gathered some things to eat, "_ he said in a calm voice. _" I didn't have anything other than my two hands at this point. "_

The pressure of her fingers around his arms got stronger as she nodded.

" But one day, it was even too difficult to walk, to stand, " he continued. " So I had to use camouflage and hide. "

Katniss let out a strangled cry, leaning forward so her forehead would find his shoulder.

_" At some point, I was sure it was the end of the road for me, "_ Peeta added, staring blankly in front of me. _" But you found me Katniss. "_

His voice didn't give away the pain he felt, not leaving a single hint of the despair he had felt.

He didn't feel the need to remind her of the "new rule", announced by Claudius Templesmith, that turned out to be a heartless trick.

Her hands slid along the blond's arms as he settled one on top of her head.

_" You even risked your life to get some medicine for me, "_ he continued. _" I will always be grateful for that Katniss. "_

She wailed, unable to contain her tears.

_" Always, " _he repeated.

This single word meant many things to him. To Katniss too.

She raised her head slowly, her eyes finding his, _" Always? "_

Peeta gave a single nod, pulling her into a tight hug. Her arms closed around his body on their own, and she inhaled in his sent.

_" Is it really okay? "_ she asked, her nose buried in his neck.

The hand on top of Katniss' head started to move, expert and calloused fingers expertly massaging her scalp.

_" It is, I promise. "_

**/**

Katniss and Peeta moved to lie on the big couch of the living room, and didn't let go of each other.

Eventually, they both fell asleep.

**/**

Peeta groaned, pulling the brunette closer as loud voices seemed to talk right in his ear. He used the arm that rested on her waist to push them away, to make them shut up, without any result.

_" Hey, we have to leave, "_ the voices kept repeating.

He closed his eyes tighter, already waking up, shook his head in disapproval.

_" No but I'm serious here guys, "_ the voice's owner stated._ " Get ready. "_

Peeta quirked one eye open, almost feeling attacked by the room's lightning.

_" Great, you're not sleeping anymore, "_ the man sighed. _" Now, get up. "_

He was expecting it to be his friend Finnick, but surprisingly, it was Gale. The boy was standing, his arms crossed around his broad chest.

_" Understood, "_ Peeta assured him, thinking it would make him leave.

Only he didn't. He stared at the two of them.

The blond rolled his eyes and shook Katniss' shoulder gently.

She turned around, scooted closer to him.

Peeta shot a glance at Gale, that was still looking at them. Making things awkward.

"_ Do you need anything? "_ the blond finally asked, kinda pissed.  
Katniss' best friend exhaled loudly through his nose, _" I do, "_ he replied. _" I need you two to get up and get ready to leave. "_

Peeta curved an eyebrow sarcastically, nodded.

_" We're in that process, "_ he told the other boy. _" We'll be ready in three minutes. "_

He wanted to simply tell him to go away, but didn't.

_" Three minutes, " _Gale repeated. _" If you're not by the entrance, I'll come back. "_

He walked away, setting his cape over his backpack.

Peeta pushed himself up on an elbow, making Katniss growl and whine at the same time.

_" You heard him, " _he whispered, using his free hand to run a hand through her black curls.

She hummed in response, and after a couple seconds, stretched her arms up her head, knuckles hitting the edge of the couch.

He sat, reached for his boots which he started to put on, while Katniss rolled on her back.

Peeta smiled, and her grey eyes fluttered open.

_" I think that little nap was necessary, "_ she breathed out, stretching again.

The blond couldn't help but let his eyes travel down her face, then down her body.

He quickly shook his head and focused on his shoelaces again.

_" Yeah, me too, "_ he agreed.

He checked if the knot was tight enough, shaking his fake leg around.

Katniss pouted, looking at him, _" Isn't it difficult sometimes? " _she asked. _" I mean… To deal with it? "  
_Peeta looked away from his feet, _" A bit, but that is really not that big a deal. "_

She let out a yawn, covering her mouth with her hands, and suddenly sat up.

_" Guess the break is over, "_ she sighed.

The boy let out a light laughter, that seemed to echo in the room.

_" You're right about that, "_ he said. _" Let's move or Gale will come find us. "_

**/**

They walked out of the house, right after Boggs told them not to stay in formation, to avoiding being suspicious.

Peeta had joined Finnick with Katniss, enjoying a casual conversation while Coin's secondhand thanked the rebel couple.

_" There doesn't seem to be a lot of people, "_ the older blond stated, smiling. _" Our host was right. "  
_The brunette gave a nod, _" And it doesn't look like it's going to rain either, " _she added.  
_" Which is absolutely great, " _Peeta blurted out in a laugh. _" That wasn't enjoyable at all. "_

The three of them laughed, while Gale chatted with Cressida, the producer.

Squad members kept moving in the District's streets, sometimes getting a weird look from an inhabitant.

Boggs looked absolutely stressed, worried, and couldn't help but look around him, getting more attention.

Peeta wished he could act normally instead.

**/**

The group made a great progression until midday with traps only starting closer to the Capitol.

_" How long before we reach the border? " _Finnick asked, staring at the blue sky.

Peeta shrugged, because he had no idea. It could take four to five days if they didn't have to stop a lot, but it could also take a week or more.

_" Paylor just told me they reached a shelter to eat in, "_ Coin's secondhand announced. _" We should stop as well, "_ he added.

He looked down at his wrist, turned the Holo on.

_" Let's take a right at the next crossroad, "_ he stated. _" And in about ten minutes, we'll find a house there. "_

More people were wandering around the town, getting home to have lunch, but the rhythm never slowed down.

Katniss' shoulder brushed against Peeta's constantly as she walked right next to him.

It wasn't like there was no room in the streets of District 2, but it seemed like the blond's presence eased her mind.

**/**

The rebel's house they entered was larger than the previous one, provided with huge couches and windows.

While soldiers opened their cans of food, Boggs stared at the street, his gun at the ready.

_" I'm sure he's worried, "_ Katniss stated, pulling a fork out of her backpack. _" But we're doing fine. "_

Finnick nodded, taking a bite of corn.

_" Yeah, "_ Peeta agreed. _" Nobody really pays attention to us. "_

Katniss took place next to him, a big can of beans in hand.

_" I'm not really hungry, " _she uttered in a sigh. _" Maybe we can share? "  
_The blond nodded,_ " Sure. "_

The three soldiers kept talking, avoiding the mission in their conversation. They thought about it all the time, and wanted to somehow forget about it for a while.

But after a couple minutes, Katniss told the boys about the thing Beetee gave to her before they left.

_" In that little pocket right here, there's a pill, " _she said, motioning to her right shoulder.

Finnick moved around on the couch, turning so he could face her.

Peeta eyed the pocket very seriously, _" What kind of pill is that? "_

A sad smile expended on her face as she rubbed the material of her uniform.

_" He calls it a 'death pill', " _she answered in a quiet voice. _" If I ever get captured, I'll just have to reach for it. "_

The blonds shared a look, both frowning.

Peeta understood why she would need it.

Nobody knew what exactly happened to her in the tributes' center, but it surely was a thing she didn't want to endure again. Still, the thought of Katniss committing suicide made the blond feel sick in his stomach.

He lowered his fork in the can, handed it to the brunette.

She reached for his shoulder, grabbed it in a firm way until their eyes met.

_" I asked him about it myself, " _she assured him. _" It was my choice, " _she insisted.

She didn't need to tell him that, he already knew it. But it didn't make things easier.

Finnick let out a breath, _" We'll do anything so you don't have to use it, " _he simply said.

Peeta tried to say something too, but he could only nod.

**/**

Twenty minutes later, the squad was on the move again, progressing through District 2. It was mostly made out of white houses. And the sun reflecting on the stone was almost blinding.

_" This was Cato and Clove's District, " _Katniss said out of nowhere.

Finnick hummed to himself.

And also where most peacekeepers were trained, Peeta thought. Where guns were made.

The three soldiers walked together again, but silence was hanging between them.

At some point, Gale joined them.

_" Hey, how is it going for you? " _he asked, not even glancing at them.  
Katniss smiled, _" Quite normal I guess. "_

They started a conversation, and ended up leaving Finnick and Peeta behind.

_" These two are still very close, " _the older one stated. _" But I don't think that's surprising. "_

Peeta nodded, not finding anything to say about that subject. He knew that the bond they shared was very intimate, that they were basically from the same family. There was nothing to argue about.

_" Do you think something happened between them? " _Finnick asked.  
The smaller blond shrugged, he did that a lot apparently, _" I have an idea about it, but I don't want to know what's true. "_

His friend made a face.

_" I'm asking you, because I found Gale's reaction kinda odd when he found the two of you hugging, " _he clarified.

The only thing the blond remembered about this was Katniss being close to him again. He couldn't recall anything other than that.

_" It's possible they had a thing, " _Peeta blurted out. _" But I don't really want to talk about it now. "_

This put their short discussion to an end.

**/**

They spent hours walking in the streets, and by diner time, Boggs was satisfied with their day.

_" Katniss, we should film you while the light is still good, " _he declared, staring at the sun starting his descent in the sky. _" Cressida will tell you what to say and do. "_

The rest of the team took the opportunity and sat on the sidewalk, feet hurting after their journey.

The brunette took the cape off her back, revealing her bow and quiver full of arrows.

Cressida got closer to her, smiling, _" Just stand over there, by the end of the road, " _she told her. _" All you have to do is say a couple words to give the rebels some hope. "_

Peeta stared at the two of them.

Hope was a short word that could change many things. It held a lot of power that was just waiting to be discovered and put to good use.

_" Anything more specific? " _Katniss asked.

The blond woman laughed.

_" Tell them how you feel about having to do this mission, " _she hinted her. _" How wrong it is that you have to be here, and not in your District with your family. "_

The blond stared at his boots.

District 12 had disappeared. It turned into a ghost town after the attack.

He saw it with his own eyes.

Even if they came back, there'd be nothing to come home to, nobody to find.

**/**

Messalla, Pollux and Castor installed their equipment while Cressida gave Katniss other directives and suggestions.

_" I'm still not understanding why there's a filming going on, " _Peeta sighed, massaging his left temple.

Finnick frowned.

_" Well, Coin tried to sell it as a way to keep the revolution alive, " _he said. _" She thinks it will make people want to join the fight. "  
_Peeta smiled sadly, _" It's depressing that it has to come to a war for things to change, " _he replied.

His friend couldn't deny this statement.

_" And that it took 75 Hunger Games for people to realize how bad the government was, " _he added, nodding.

Peeta closed his eyes, inhaled deeply.

_" More than 1600 children have died, " _he breathed out. _" Because people were too afraid to do something. "_

Finnick shook his friend's shoulder gently.

_" And it's going to be over soon, " _he reminded the boy. _" If everything goes as planned, it will be the end for Snow. "  
_Peeta let out a shaky laughter, _" And the beginning of Alma Coin. "_

' Would it be better? ' Peeta wondered. No one could answer that question, not even Coin herself.

_" Power wants even more power, " _Finnick said.

Peeta gave a tired nod as Pollux, Castor and Messalla told Cressida that everything was ready.

**/**

Katniss took place in the middle of the road, where only a few inhabitants walked, going home after a long day of work.

The sun setting in her back made the scene kinda dramatic, but it added effect nonetheless.

_" And, action, " _the tattooed woman called, clapping her hands together.

The brunette held her bow in her hands, reaching for an arrow in her quiver. She faced the cameras, located on the helmets of Pollux and Castor, with a serious look on her face.

_" People of Panem, this message is for you, "_ she started in a confident voice._ " There is not a single minute during which we are not fighting to get our freedom back, "_ she added. _" Our children's lives back. "_

She walked closer to the brothers, placing her arrow correctly, balancing it with her index on the string of her bow.

_" We have lost too many of them already, I say it's about time we do something, " _she continued. _" We are not going to let President Snow murder more of us! "_

Nobody could take their eyes off her.

She was mesmerizing.

_" If what he wants is a civil war, then let's show him that we are not afraid, " _she growled. _" That he can't shut us down because he has a presidential title! "_

Slowly she raised her bow, aiming for the sky.

_" Killing is killing, no matter who you're claiming to be, " _she practically barked. _" And President Snow will not be exempted for all that he has done to our country! "_

She released her arrow, and watched as it exploded above the soldiers' heads.

_" I, the Mockingjay, will lead you through what will be the end of the Hunger Games, " _Katniss shouted. _" The end of oppression, the end of mass murdering, the end of an era that shouldn't even have existed! "_

Almost out of breath, she motioned to the rest of the squad with her free arm.

_" Let's put a stop to this insanity, together, " _she stated, in a calmer voice. _" Join us, for peace and justice. "_

She stared at Pollux, and Cressida gave a nod.

_" That was perfect Katniss, " _the blond told her, smiling. _" You did great. "_

Finnick kicked Peeta gently in the side.

_" You both are amazing when it comes to speeches, " _he said to him. _" What an impressive pair. "_

His friend giggled, shaking his head while Katniss settled down her bow.

**/**

While the packing was done, the teammates left the street and walked towards the shelter where Boggs had decided they would spend the night.

Peeta was tired, but he was glad they could progress that much in a day. If things kept going this smoothly, it would be a matter of days before they'd reach the Capitol.

Katniss had insisted on being alone for the rest of the night, and everybody respected that.

The blond knew that giving this sort of speech could be exhausting, especially psychically. He watched her walking a few feet ahead of him, her cape fluttering in the wind behind her.

_" I'm sure she's worried about her family, " _Finnick stated, sighing.  
His friend smiled, _" You worry about Annie as well, don't you? "_

The older boy nodded, pinching his lips together.

_" She doesn't deal with my absence very well, " _he replied. _" I just hope she found someone to talk to. "_

Peeta tilted his head to the side.

_" I'm sure she did, " _he reassured him. _" She's lovely. "  
_Finnick laughed, patted him on the shoulder playfully, _" You sure are right about that! "_

Peeta wished Snow wouldn't order a bombing of District 13 while they were away, prayed for it to never happen.

**/**

The house where they were settling in was unattended, simply made for soldiers to rest and get full on provisions. Many bunks and couches had been installed in the several rooms.

Peeta, Finnick and Katniss shared one of those bedroom on the first floor, Gale being the first one to take his spell of duty.

The boys gave Katniss the single bed and settled for the bunk.

_" Well, I could use a shower or two, " _the smaller blond sighed, kicking his boots off. _" Rain doesn't seem to be enough, " _he added in a laugh.

Katniss smiled while she made her bed, unwrapping the blanket at the foot of her bed.

_" Do you think they have clean water in here? " _he asked the other boy.  
Finnick shrugged, _" You should look around, we might be lucky and find some, " _he replied.

Peeta got up, barefooted, and nodded, aiming for the door.

When he was almost out, Finnick called from the inside of the room.

_" If you find some, you better tell us Mellark! " , _he shouted.

The blond left giggling.

**/**

Fortunately, there was running water in a small bathroom.

The soldiers went one by one, feeling fresher and cleaner even without any soap.

Finnick went right after Peeta, a huge grin on his face when he realized there was hot water as well.

When Peeta walked back in the bedroom, a towel hanging around his waist and a grey shirt over his shoulders, he found Katniss combing her hair with her fingers.

_" Hey, are you okay? " _he asked, climbing the ladder to his bunk.

She turned around to look at him, gave him a tired nod.

_" I am, " _she replied. _" I was just thinking that we're asking people to risk their lives for the revolution. "_

Peeta didn't understand what her point was, so he waited for further explanations.

_" Isn't it a bit like killing them indirectly, sending them to a war? "_ she said more than asked. _" Aren't we the same as Snow? "_

The blond stopped moving, his fake feet on the last rung.

_" No we're not, " _he stated. _" We're not forcing anyone to do anything if they don't want to. "_

Katniss gave him a sad smile. She didn't look convinced by his words.

_" Snow kills children for killing, you said it yourself, " _he added. _" We're just asking for some help. "_

His position was uncomfortable, so he climbed down, reached for Katniss' side.

_" We are not the bad guys Katniss, " _he told her, taking her hands in his. _" I swear. "_

She stared at their linked fingers, shook her head.

_" What if there's no bad guys? "_

Peeta's mouth opened in surprise. He surely didn't expect that sort of answer.

_" Believe me, there are some, " _he replied. _" The ones who decided that creating the Hunger Games would be a good idea to keep a country together. "_

She lowered her head, and drops fell from her hair on Peeta's arms and legs, making him jolt slightly

_" The one who forced more than 1600 families to mourn one of their member, " _he continued. _" The ones who made pregnant women cry because they weren't sure their child would make it to adulthood. "_

Katniss had started to cry, tears mixing with the cold water flowing down her hair.

_" You don't have to feel guilty for anything, " _Peeta told her. _" Without you, this more than needed revolution would have taken, who knows how many, years to finally start. "_

She took her hands back, and the boy thought he said something wrong.

Her soft cries seemed to echo in the room, and she reached for Peeta's waist, circling her arms around it.

The blond could only hug her back.

_" I know it must be really hard for you, to have that much responsibility, " _he breathed out, running his hands over her back. _" But it's not your fault if bad things happen. "_

She nodded vividly in his shoulder, her fingers wrapping around his shirt, pulling on it.

Peeta rocked her back and forth, whispering reassuring words in her ear until she fell asleep in his arms.

He laid her down on her bed, put the blanket over her body, and turned off the lights before he got in his own bed, completely exhausted.

* * *

**NDA : I'm absolutely sorry for the delay between the 37th and the 38th chapter.**

**I've been taking my finals in Uni, so I couldn't write at all.**

**Now I'm done, so I hope I'll be more efficient and publish more regularly.**

**Hope you enjoyed it, thank you for (still) reading me,**

**Bisous**


	39. Chapter 39 : We can make it

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 39 : We can make it**

When Peeta's eyes opened, he realized his whole body had cramps. He managed to sit up in his bunk, and stretched his arms out, yawning.

_" Good morning sunshine, " _Finnick said grinning, standing on the ladder.

The smaller blond jolted in surprise, not expecting his friend to be this close.

He grunted, rubbed his eyes lazily, _" Morning, " _he mumbled, his voice sleepy and broke.

_" I don't think you need to rush, " _his team mate assured him. _" Most of the squad is still asleep. "_

Peeta gave a vague nod, laid back down on his mattress.

_" Were you watching me while I slept? " _he asked, his eyes fluttering close. _" You know, if I didn't know you that well, I'd say you're obsessed with me. "_

Finnick didn't answer right away, and Peeta giggled on his own.

_" Then you don't know me at all buddy, " _Finnick stated, smiling. _" You're always in my mind, " _he joked, getting down from the ladder.

His friend didn't reply, looked at the rest of the room.

_" Katniss is gone? " _he asked, getting up on his elbow.

Finnick hummed and nodded, _" Yeah, she wanted to watch around the house. "_

Peeta sighed, rolled on his side, drifted into sleep again.

/

The blond woke up to a big noise coming from the outside of the room he was in. He forced his eyes open, blinked the brightness away for a while.

_" I'm sorry, but this time, you have to leave your comfy bed, "_ Finnick stated, clapping his hands.

Peeta grunted, _" It's not that comfy. "_

His friend rolled his eyes, filling his bag as quickly as he could.

_" Anyway, you have to get up buddy, "_ he insisted. _" We leave in ten. "_

Peeta sighed a positive answer. Then managed to sit up and stretch his arms above his head, his fingers brushing against the cracked ceiling.

_" You should eat as well, Boggs said we probably won't stop midday, " _his friend added as he left.

The younger boy got down the ladder, the joints of his knees and ankles hurting with each step down.

Once he reached the floor, he sat on the lower bunk, and reached for his socks and shoes, putting them on easily.

He wasn't the complaining type, but that day, he didn't feel like running across Panem at all.

/

Exactly nine minutes later, the squad left the house, and started wandering in District 2's almost desert streets.

It was too early for them to be noticed by workers, and Boggs said that he wanted them to reach the border by the end of the day.

Finnick walked next to Peeta, but none of them felt the need to start a conversation. They were lost in their own thoughts, trying to find some motivation to keep going.

Katniss chose the company of her best friend, exchanging a few sentences in the silence that surrounded the whole team.

/

About an hour and a half later, the sun was higher in the sky, already warming up the soldiers' skins.

Peeta wiped a drop of sweat away from his forehead, moved his cape so it would cover his backpack more efficiently.

_" Here, have some water, " _Finnick said, handing him one of his bottles.

His friend smiled, nodded and grabbed it, taking huge swallows out of it.

Once he was done, he gave it back, cleared his throat, _" I'm sorry I'm not really chatty this morning. "_

Finnick giggled, looked up, _" You don't have to apologize about that, I didn't make the first step either. "_

Peeta was aware of that, but he knew he hadn't been exactly pleasant since he woke up.

/

They went unnoticed through the streets, making progress, each step bringing them closer to what could be the end of an era.

At some point they took a break so Coin's secondhand could chat with Beetee while the Holo added new traps on its map.

_" I peeked at Boggs' machine, we will have to slow down in a couple hours, " _Finnick sighed, scratching the back of his head.

His friend pouted and nodded, sitting on the sidewalk and extending his legs, both real and fake.

_" Let's hope this Holo thing really works, " _he blurted out. _" The more we are, the more chances we have. "_

Finnick laid back and yawned.

It was so peaceful that soldiers forgot they were in constant danger.

Peeta pulled out a bottle of water and a can of corn out of his bag, along with a fork.

He ate silently, let his friend steal bites from his own cutlery.

Boggs then told the squad they had to keep going, that they would reach the Capitol's border before sunset.

/

During the afternoon, the heat kept rising, and the teammates kept wiping sweat away from their faces.

Their uniforms weren't exactly light, made to be bulletproof.

_" I swear that I lost two pounds today, " _Finnick joked, moving his sleeves up his arms.

Peeta could only chuckle in response.

/

Katniss slowed down her walk so she could reach the pair of blonds.

_" How is it going for you? " _she asked, bangs sticking to her forehead and temples.

The younger blond stopped looking at the ground, and smiled when he saw her.

_" As hot as it is on the front I guess, " _he replied.

She smiled back at him, got closer until their elbows brushed.

Peeta was almost suffocating, but he didn't mind her heat radiating at his side.

_" I was thinking emotionally, " _Katniss retorted cockily. _" I know you're cooking inside those suits. "_

Finnick let out breath, pushed his trident further into his bag, _" I just want it to be over so we can finally go home. "_

And the youngest victor had a loving wife waiting for him in 13, that was probably enduring sleepless nights during his absence.

Peeta couldn't even begin to imagine how Finnick was feeling.

He was probably fueling his motivation by picturing Snow's death, just like he did himself.

_" What about you Peeta? " _Katniss asked.

Every single time she pronounced his name, the boy's heart jumped in his chest. It was such a reinvigorating feeling.

He shrugged vaguely, _" I wouldn't mind going home either. "_

Katniss froze, but managed to keep walking.

_" District 12 doesn't exist anymore, " _she mumbled. _" Where is our home now… " _she said more than asked.

Peeta took a moment to think about it.

He smiled, _" Home is where the heart is, they said. "_

The brunette wanted to nod, but just couldn't. The answer was way too vague.

_" And where does your heart belong? "_

Words got stuck in Peeta's throat, and he let out an embarrassing moan.

She giggled, _" No pressure here. "_

Finnick patted his friend on the back, smiling from ear to ear, because he knew why he didn't say anything.

Peeta refused to rush anything. He was satisfied with what he had with Katniss already. After all they had been through, he was happy she talked to him.

_" I'm not sure I can answer your question actually, " _he finally admitted.

Katniss didn't voice her opinion, but she knew that her person was one of the reasons why he couldn't.

/

Finally, the sun started to descend in the sky, and a light breeze comforted the soldiers, allowing their skin to breathe a bit better.

They hadn't stopped, and Boggs had picked up the pace, really eager to leave District 2.

_" Come on, we're a few miles away from the border, " _he stated, clapping his hands together as an encouragement. _" We will have all night to rest, let's get there already. "_

The filming crew was the part of the squad that had trouble catching up, leaving them in the back of the cortege.

Cressida proposed to carry the camera gear for a while, but everyone from her team refused.

_" I'm part of it a much as you are, " _she stated, frowning and signing eagerly.

Pollux gave up, and they exchanged their backpacks.

He warned her by sign language that he would take it back once the group would step inside the Capitol district.

/

Pollux didn't lie, and once the white stones of District 2 were in the squad's back, he claimed his backpack.

_" Here we are soldiers, " _Coin's secondhand said, turning the Holo on. _" This is exactly where it gets serious. "_

He gathered the team members around him, willing to give precise orders.

_" From now on, we will progress in pairs because, as you will notice, the streets are extremely narrow in this part of the Capitol, " _Boggs explained. _" Patience will be necessary if we want to make it alive. "_

Peeta swallowed with difficulty, not exactly realizing what they were going to walk through.

He felt as if he never left the arena.

So he told himself that if he survived two Games, he could also survive this.

Boggs straightened up, _" There are no inhabitants in this zone, so you should definitely get your weapons ready, " _he continued. _" But be cautious, we have to be as discreet as possible to put the odds in our favor. "_

He looked at the sky that was becoming darker slowly.

_" You should use silent weapons, such as bow and arrows, knives or crossbow, " _he specified. _" Normally, we shouldn't have to use it, because Snow didn't put any peacekeeper in here. He's convinced that his traps are enough to dismiss rebels. "_

Leeg 1 and Leeg 2 held hands, closed their eyes as they nodded to these directives.

Jackson simply looked straight in front of her, a serious frown on her forehead.

_" Listen, I believe in what we are doing, I believe in all of us, " _Coin's secondhand added. _" We can make it. "_

He walked backwards and faced the street in front of them.

The whole squad took a few minutes to collect themselves, and Boggs didn't dare bothering this quiet moment.

/

The ten first minutes in the border were spent in complete silence.

Peeta swore he could hear their heartbeats revolve against the walls of the dilapidated house around them.

Boggs made the group stop several times, guiding them through the obstacles.

Once he thought they progressed enough for the day, he chose a random house on their way for them to set camp.

/

Finnick was lying on the floor, on top of his cape, snoring quite peacefully, Katniss slept on a thin mattress, but Peeta couldn't close his eyes.

Gale and Jackson were on guard for the next two hours, but the blond wished it was his turn so he wouldn't have to sit in that room.

He stared at his friends, knowing he should do like them, but all he was able to do was tremble, almost cowardly.

His thoughts drifted away, reminding him of his family and District 12. There was no solace in that.

/

Couple minutes later, his eyelids started to get heavier, so he lied between his teammates, on his back.

His head fell to the side, and he looked at Katniss for a while. She had dark circles under her eyes, paler skin than when they parted in the arena.

But all he could see in front of him was sheer beauty.

The brunette groaned in her sleep, turned on her side.

Peeta noticed she was holding her sister's diary close to her chest, and he smiled. He was glad she had it with her.

/

Finnick woke him up, making him realize that he fell asleep.

_" Peeta, we have to make guard, come on buddy, " _he whispered to him, retrieving his trident and unfolding it.

The blond moaned, and sat up so he wouldn't drift into sleep again. He yawned and ran a hand through his hair.

_" I'll be ready in 5, I'll join you, "_ he told his friend.

Finnick nodded, and got out of the room.

Peeta stretched his arms and his leg, then stood up, taking a few step away from Katniss that was still asleep.

He put on his shoes and took his crossbow before he exited the bedroom and closed the door behind him.

/

The boys' guard was calm, but they agreed on walking around the building.

_" There is nobody in here, "_ Finnick blurted out. _" Only traps, and us… "_

Peeta didn't feel the need to answer anything.

/

After two hours, the blonds sat on the porch, taking turns when it came to walk around the house.

They still had more than an hour left.

_" If everything goes as planned, we'll get to Snow in less than four days, " _Peeta stated as he exchanged his place with Finnick on the step in front of the door.

His friend gave a tired nod.

_" The sooner the better, "_ he replied.

Peeta chewed on his bottom lip, _" It almost feels too easy. "_

They had never really been put in a dangerous situation since they left 13. And there was something scary about it, even if it was comforting.

Finnick walked away from him, _" We're just too accustomed to being on the verge of loosing our lives, "_ he reassured him. _" Let's embrace this moment of brief peace before war. "_

/

Both boys joined Katniss in the bedroom.

Peeta kicked his boots off his feet, checked his prothesis and rolled on his side, facing her.

_" Why are you awake? " _he asked gently when he saw grey eyes staring back.

She shrugged, pulled Prim's book closer to her chest.

_" Are you okay? "_

Katniss nodded, sat up, staring at the leather cover of the diary.

She turned her head so she could look at him directly, opened the book, _" Can you read it with me? "_

Peeta scooted closer to her, their thighs brushing as Katniss looked for the passage where she last stopped.

On this page, Primrose commented on how awkward Peeta and Katniss' relationship had become since they left the arena.

The brunette shot a side look at the boy, noticed a sad frown on his forehead.

_" I can't even remember why I acted so cold towards you, "_ she confessed. _" It's really hard to picture someone like you doing something wrong. "_

Peeta wished he could appreciate her explanation, but he was just an ordinary human being, with his own flaws.

And he knew he had a lot.

They kept reading in silence, Peeta lost in his own world.

After a few minutes, Prim ranted on the show the night Peeta carried Katniss in her room. How he stayed by her side, waiting for medicine to make her fall asleep.

_" I wished I could remember it, " _the brunette sighed.

She looked at the drawing next to the page, and felt enraptured by it.

Her fingers moved along the picture, feeling the marks left by the pen when Peeta drew it.

_" My sister doesn't know what happened, " _she whispered. _" Can you tell me? "_

The boy remained silent for a while, staring at Katniss' fingertips moving on the smooth material of the paper.

_" Only if you can, you don't have to force yourself, " _she added.

Peeta swallowed with difficulty, his mouth dry from anxiousness.

_" There's not a lot to say about it, " _he said, his voice tremulous and quivering. _" I held your hand. "_

Katniss' guts told her there was something else that he couldn't talk about just yet.

She really wanted to ask him.

_" I think a few words made their way out of my mouth without me wanting it, " _Peeta continued, his gaze focused on his sketch. _" You asked me to stay with you. "_

Katniss' eyes widened a bit, and Finnick's snoring echoed in the room.

The blond almost forgot that his friend was also there.

_" There's something about this question, " _Katniss said, tasting the words on her tongue. _" I'm sure there is… "_

Peeta didn't want to get his hopes up, because she never said anything about his answer before she got captured.

He couldn't imagine her remembering it now.

They were both done reading page, but Katniss didn't move on.

She kept staring at the drawing, licking her lips as she tried to make something out of this riddle.

Peeta waited patiently, his real feet tapping the floor out of stress.

_" Stay with me, " _the brunette said over and over again.

A shiver ran down Peeta's back when Katniss grabbed his forearm. He could see she was trying to say something, emotions getting in the way.

_" Hey, there's no rush, " _he told her in a soothing voice. _" Take your time. "_

Katniss pulled and Peeta was thrown onto her torso. She held him there, her breath uneven and irregular.

_" I remember, " _she managed to moan.

Her fingers let go of his arm.

Peeta moved even closer, caged her in his arms and rocked her back and forth gently.

There was one thing he thought would calm her.

It left his mouth before he could even be sure it was the best thing to do, _" Always. "_

Katniss cried out, hid her face in his shoulder.

The blond was scared he didn't choose the right choice of words, but she held him closer.

_" I-I'm so glad I remember, " _Katniss wailed. _" I'm so glad. "_

Peeta didn't know if it was the excitement talking, but her lips were on his, firm and soft at the same time.

His breath got caught in his throat, but he couldn't push her away. If it could help her now, it didn't matter if the aftermath was shady on his side.

She started pecking at his lips desperately, her fingers tangled in his blond curls. A moan got lost between their mouths, and Peeta wasn't sure it was hers.

With his eyes shut, he pushed towards her gently, following her movements with his own lips.

He felt too hot in his suit, too sticky from the day they spent walking in the sun.

And this exchange probably didn't mean the same thing for both of them. But it felt as if he needed it just as much as Katniss did.

They gasped for air, and her mouth was instantly on his again, biting and licking furiously.

The blonde's eyes rolled in his skull as he opened his mouth, capturing her tongue between his thin lips.

She groaned, but didn't move back, deepening the kiss willingly instead.

The whole world has disappeared around them at this point. There was not a single thing that could stop them.

Peeta felt invincible, for the first time in his life.

Katniss' hands crawled down his neck, glided down his jaw and up the side of his face. There was a softness in her touches that made Peeta's stomach curl and burn at the same time.

Katniss pushed herself up on her knees, and hovered over Peeta, never letting an ounce of space between their lips.

She kissed him more eagerly, sat on his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck.

Peeta knew this had to come to an end, but he didn't have the strength to push her away.

_" Just for now, " _Katniss whispered against his mouth.

These few words cooled Peeta down, and he let his arms drop at his sides. His kisses got lazier as he felt pain running in his veins.

Katniss felt it, and moved back, searching for any answer on his face.

_" What's wrong? " _she asked, noticing the saddened expression on his face.

She cupped his cheeks, tried to capture his gaze, but he couldn't look at her.

He knew he didn't have the right to blame her for what just happened. And he wasn't blaming her. He was blaming everything they had to go through.

Still, he had this knot forming in his throat, enabling him from talking.

_" Did I do something wrong? " _she insisted, fingers digging in his cheeks. _" Please tell me I didn't ruin everything with this. "_

He looked at her straight in the eyes and it was too much. Tears crawled down his face, hands turned into fists as he tried to remain composed.

_" I-I'm sorry, " _Katniss moaned, using her thumbs to wipe the tears away. _" I can't lose you, I-I can't. "_

Peeta still couldn't talk, so he reached for her neck and caressed her skin gently.

_" It was selfish, I'm so sorry, " _Katniss wailed, shaking her head.

Words kept flowing, and the brunette kept apologizing.

But Peeta didn't want that. It was nobody's fault. Especially not hers.

_" There is no reason for you to beg for my pardon, " _he reassured her in a broken voice. _" So much is happening, that's why I'm crying. "_

She nodded vividly, settled her forehead against his.

_" You don't have to blame yourself, " _he added. _" We're both lost and in a process of healing, " _he stated. _" It takes time to find happiness. "_

Katniss inhaled deeply, closed her eyes.

_" I don't want to wait… " _she murmured.

Peeta couldn't even try to deny that.

/

It took long minutes for the atmosphere to thaw.

They remained going through Primrose's book, stopping at some parts that needed specification until the sun started rising in the sky.

_" We probably should've gotten more sleep, " _Peeta said in a yawn.

Katniss smiled and closed the diary, _" Once all of this is over, we'll get plenty of rest. "_

The blond simply nodded, then stretched out on the floor.

He stared at the ceiling for a while, and felt Katniss setting by his side. She rested her head on his shoulder, and a hand on her torso.

It reminded him of all the times they laid like that in the past.

_" I feel like sleeping now would be a waste, " _Katniss whispered.

The blond smiled, _" Yeah, me too. "_

They kept discussing until Cressida walked in the room to wake them up.

_" Today's an important day, " _she stated. _" We need to film you in the Capitol, it will give people some motivation for sure. "_

Katniss hummed in response, buried her nose in Peeta's chest.

The blonde filmmaker left without another word.

/

When the squad left the house, it was around 6 AM. The weather was cooler than the previous day, a few clouds offering some shade.

_" I've uploaded the Holo's map before we left, but keep an eye open, there could be traps that aren't indicated, " _Boggs explained.

Gale walked by his side, holding his crossbow firmly, _" How could we recognize a trap by sight? " _he asked.

Coin's secondhand nodded to that question.

_" There should be motion sensors on top of buildings, " _he replied. _" Some sort of a black box. "_

Peeta couldn't believe they didn't tell them about this earlier.

_" Guess we'll have to look up for the rest of our journey, " _Finnick joked by his side. _" Our necks are going to hurt. "_

The blond could only giggle. His friend brightened his mission like nobody else did.

_/_

They stopped regularly to skirt some traps, then counterbalanced by running once the path was clear.

This rhythm got every member of the squad tired, but nobody complained.

As they jogged in a large alley, Peeta noticed a black cubic form on top of a small house. Being at the back of the cortege, he ran through his teammates.

_" STOP! " _he yelled, pushing Gale aside on his way, _" STOP! THERE'S A TRAP! "_

It took a few seconds for Jackson to react to his warning.

Fortunately, he grabbed her shoulders and pulled her back as a giant bear trap rose from an opening in the ground and activated.

The metallic sound that followed revolved in the street, the whole squad holding their breath.

Jackson froze in Peeta's arms, staring at the empty weapon.

_" Are you okay?! " _he asked, his fingers holding her solidly.

Jackson gave a few nods, and they took a careful step back.

Boggs ran to their side, kneeled in front of the soldier, _" Are you hurt? "_

She shook her head, _" N-No, I'm fine, " _she assured him. _" If it wasn't for Peeta, I would have lost a leg, " _she added. _" Or worst. "_

Finnick joined his friend, and rubbed his arms until he could release her teammate.

Peeta was trembling, relief making way through his system.

_" You did good, " _his friend told him. _" It's okay now. "_

Serious things only started.

**NDA : I'm really sorry I took so much time for this chapter.**

**I was done with uni so I have no excuse, really… I just couldn't find any inspiration and refused to give you something bad.**

**Hope you liked it,**

**Thanks for reading me.**


	40. Chapter 40 : That's what you and I do

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"

" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 40 : That's what you and I do**

Boggs granted a break to the whole squad, and took the time to talk with Jackson, that was unable to move, frozen with fear. Coin's secondhand used gentle words along with a firm grip on her shoulder to calm her down.

Katniss rushed to Peeta's side, _" Are you okay? " _she squealed, grabbing his right arm with both hands.

The blond gave a few nods and sat on the sidewalk, closing his eyes.

His real leg was shaking, but what really shocked him was the rhythm of his heartbeat. Pounding in his chest, it threatened to burst out of it, to reduce his ribcage to ashes.

The brunette sat beside him, rubbed his arms, shoulders and back until he could relax a bit.

_" It's alright, " _she whispered. Motions of her fingers over his uniform stopped for a moment until she started moving them again, _" You saved her. "_

She ended up massaging him, Finnick involving Peeta in a random conversation so he could move on.

But the boy could see the trap close right in front of Jackson and him, a few inches away from her feet. He couldn't shake this image away.

**/**

Twenty minutes later, the group of soldiers started its progression through the Capitol's suburb once again.

Tension was palpable and not a single word was said for a long hour.

Boggs checked his Holo frequently, frowning seriously, motioning for the rest of the squad to stop when it was needed.

The pause they took midday lasted longer than usually requested, but Coin's secondhand knew that it was necessary.

Finnick took a bite of some broccolis, then a few more before pushing the can down on the ground.

_" You should have some too, " _he gently told Peeta.  
His friend only shook his head negatively, his right hand grabbing a water bottle firmly, _" I can't eat. "_

**/**

Katniss wasn't with them but talking with Gale about the rest of the journey.

It occurred to her that they would lose people on the way, but she never expected she would care so much.

She couldn't imagine going back to 12 without her best friend or Peeta. A doubt lingered when it came to Finnick, but it turned out that she couldn't hate the guy.

Still, she never thought the rest of their group's safety would matter like that.

Gale handed her some bread while eating his own loaf.

She grabbed it, stared at it for a while.

Her best friend smiled, _" Brings back memories, uh? "  
__" Yeah, definitely does, " _she sighed.

Her eyes looked up at the sky, and when she saw there was not a single cloud, she froze. The day Peeta saved her was a rainy one for sure.

Gale made his shoulders roll, _" You're thinking about that time again? "_

Katniss gave a nod. Of course she was.

_" My family wouldn't be there if he didn't throw away this bread, " _she stated, taking a bite. _" As much as I love stew, there is no comparison with this. "  
_Her friend giggled, _" It holds a special meaning, that's why Catnip. "_

**/**

Finnick and Peeta ended up taking a nap, pressure and tension exhausting every ounce of their bodies.

They were awaken by a loud noise, sounding much like an explosion.

Boggs instantly rose on his feet, his shotgun in hands, _" Our allies are there, " _he simply stated.

He explained to the rest of his team that Coin had ordered a few groups of rebels to drag the Capitol's attention from them.

It made Peeta want to say something, but he restrained himself from doing it.

_" Since we activated a trap, Snow has to know about it now, " _claimed the president's secondhand. _" She had to make a decision. "_

He pivoted on his heels and looked at the soldiers. Most of them were frowning seriously, their eyes aimed on the smoke that was visible a few miles away from their current position.

_" These people know what they are doing as well, " _he added. _" They volunteered. "_

Peeta couldn't help but search for Katniss. She was the only one staring at the ground, her teeth chewing down on her bottom lip.

He wanted to talk to her, but guessed that she didn't need some company in that moment.

Every single member of this unit had volunteered as well, but it didn't have the same importance as Katniss'. Her willingness to save her sister had moved a nation, had changed its mentality.

But it most importantly changed her whole life around. Personally, it wasn't for the best.

But everyone in Panem would probably praise her if they ever succeeded, even those that didn't support the rebellion.

Wether she would make it out alive or not wouldn't change that fact, and Peeta hated that.

**/**

They remained walking in the borderline of the Capitol, taking the time to observe their surroundings more precisely.

Boggs received a call from Beetee, checking if they got any damage and warning them about a new trap in their current area.

_" So the next two streets are still safe for sure? " _he asked, taping his feet on the ground out of stress.

He hummed positively to whatever answer he got.

_" Understood, thank you. "_

Closing the Holo, he turned around so he could face his squad, _" If we walk 500 meters North and 350 East, we'll be fine. "_

Cressida immediately asked permission to film for a bit. Coin's secondhand was reluctant at first since they didn't make a lot of progress, but he allowed her anyway.

The crew took several minutes to get ready, and once they were all set, the blonde producer gave directives to Katniss and Gale especially.

_" Should we say a few words as well? " _the boy asked.

Cressida smiled, _" Only if you feel inspired enough to do so, there's no obligation. "_

Every soldier started to walk normally again, their weapons at the ready while Pollux and his brother Castor followed them, cameras on.

In the end, nobody talked. Not Even Gale that proposed it, since he felt like it wouldn't be natural to randomly blurt out some motivational slogans.

**/**

Boggs sped up the pace the group had previously since they lost precious hours during the day.

Soldiers and filmmakers jogged through the streets when the path seemed clear, and violently stopped every time something looked out of place. Even some dirt on a random wall could make them loose several minutes.

Once they reached the middle of the borderline, close to sunset, Coin's secondhand guided them towards a shelter owned by a couple women. They welcomed them with smiles and fresh-out-of-the-oven potatoes covered in cheese.

_" We know that it's exhausting to do what you're all doing, "_ the older one told Boggs, shaking his hand. _" Thank you for your courage and bravery. "_

The man shook his head, saying it was nothing but the women kept telling him how wonderful they were, daring to fight the Capitol and President Snow for the sake of justice.

_" Hum, for those who would like to clean up, there's clear water in here, " _a young-looking lady claimed, bowing her head. _" It's not exactly warm, but it's not cold either, please feel free to use it. "_

A couple soldiers followed her as she showed the way towards the bathroom.

Peeta stayed in the living room with Katniss, Finnick and Cressida while the rest of the squad ate in the kitchen.

He wasn't hungry, all he wanted was a shower and a good night of sleep.

Going back to District 12 was also a thing he'd appreciate, but he wasn't stupid. There was close to no chance for him to see his house - the one in the victor's village since the other one had been destroyed - again.

**/**

The blond stood under the tepid stray of water, motionless, eyes closed, breath steady and strong. He heard his teammates laugh, some cutlery sounds next door.

It seemed so out of place.

Wrapping himself in an already wet towel, he stepped out of the cubicle, put on some fresh boxers and pants.

He walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom he would share with Katniss only, rubbing his hair with the soft fabric. It was so narrow that the two mattresses touched, forming a bigger one.

The brunette was sitting on her side, massaging her right leg.

_" Are you hurt? " _Peeta asked, pushing the door closed behind him.

She gave a strong shake of head, _" It's nothing, I think I sprained my ankle during the afternoon. I don't think it's serious."_

Standing in front of her, he trailed his teeth along his bottom lip, frowning.

He crouched next to his bag, searched through it for a while until he found a white t-shirt he used for sleeping since they left District 13. Calmly, he closed his backpack again.

_" Do you want me to look at it? " _he suggested, putting the shirt on.

She looked at him while his face was hidden by the fabric of the top.

The muscles of his stomach seemed firm and strong without even touching them. Noticing she had been staring, she shook her head and focused on her feet again.

Katniss rubbed her leg nervously, the skin over her cheekbones turning a light pink color, _" I told you, it's nothing, I'll be fine tomorrow morning. "_

Peeta heaved a sigh, rolling his eyes. He tilted his head to the left to take a better look at her injury.

Her ankle was swollen, clearly bigger than the other one.

_" Please, let me look, " _he gently insisted. _" I promise I'll be fast. It's just to make sure you're okay "_

She stared at him, still blushing and finally gave up, nodding.

The blond sat in front of her and softly settled his fingers on the swollen area. Katniss winced and pulled her leg away.

_" Bear with it a little longer, " _he instructed her, setting his other hand on her knee. _" Forgive me if I hurt you. "_

He applied several pressures on her ankle, searching for the source of pain.

When Katniss cried out, he pouted and nodded severely, _" I'll be back in a minute. "_

**/**

Peeta got downstairs and headed towards the kitchen.

He found one of their hostesses, _" Excuse me, do you have any ice in here? " _he asked. _" Somebody hurt herself and it would lessen the pain for sure. "_

The young girl nodded, and walked through a long and dark corridor, _" Follow me please_. "

She entered the second bathroom and opened a huge cupboard. It appeared that it was full of medical supplies of every genre.

After a couple seconds, she handed him a tube that contained some sort of massage creme, and a box of pills.

_" You have to apply the gel before you put some ice on the injury, " _she explained. _" I'll bring the pack of ice along with a glass of water so she can swallow the pills. "_

The ex-tribute thanked her profusely and climbed the stairs.

He found Katniss lying on her back, a pillow under her wounded ankle.

She turned her head when he walked in, and gave him a warm smile.

Peeta got next to her on the mattress, his knees sinking in, _" The next part isn't going to be enjoyable for you, but it has to be done. "_

Huffing a laugh, her smile got brighter, _" Are you sure about that? " _she asked, in a mocking tone. _" I'm pretty sure it's nothing. "_

Peeta shook his head and put some of the gel on his fingers, it was cold and greasy.

_" You hurt yourself badly once, " _he told her, setting his fingers on her olive skin. _" You couldn't walk properly, and I had to carry you to your bed. "_

She blinked repeatedly, _" I read about that in my sister's book, " _she breathed out. _" Did you… " _

Having no idea how to continue this sentence, she stopped and swallowed with difficulty, finding her throat strangely dry.

_" What is it? " _Peeta gently asked, applying the creme in small circles. _" You can ask me anything, there's no problem. "_

Katniss was hit by the boy's kindness all over again. It was an important part of him, and sometimes she wanted to tell him that he had the right to get angry, to be pissed at people, to just have an opinion and state it.

It wasn't that she disliked that part of him, she simply wanted him to be more egoistic. He deserved it.

_" I have this feeling that you really cared about me, " _she finally said, looking down at his hands on her feet. _" That you looked after me constantly, over and over again. "_

Peeta smiled, let out a shaky sigh.

Since that day he tossed her loafs of burned bread, he had been watching over her, watching her, from afar.

He didn't know if that was a good or a bad thing. It was probably a mix of both.

_" I did, and I still do, " _he replied honestly. _" But I wasn't the only one doing that Katniss. "_

Katniss looked up and met Peeta's intense blue eyes. They stared at each other for a while, unable to avert their gazes.

_" We did all we could to save one another, in every possible way, " _he added, the beat of his heart pounding at his temples. _" That's what you and I do, protect each other. "_

His fingers stopped moving along the brunette's skin.

_" I guess you're right, " _Katniss sighed. _" I really wish I could remember everything. "_

He was glad she wanted to recall her past by his side, but he didn't want it to compromise her state of mind. They were on a mission and couldn't afford these kinds of questions.

There was already_ so much_ to worry about.

Biting the inside of his cheeks, Peeta focused on her ankle, drawing clouds on the articulation with more pressure.

Katniss wailed in pain, grabbing the blond's hand on her knee, _" S-Sorry, " _she stuttered.

Peeta smiled, _" It's fine, squeeze it as hard as you want, I don't mind. "_

There was a knock on the door, and the girl Peeta talked to before entered the room. She was holding a bag full of ice cubes and a big glass of water.

_" There you go, " _she said, handing the things to the blond.

He nodded, _" Thank you very much. "_

The girl bowed exaggeratively and exited the room, closing the door as she left them alone.

_" Take two pills now, " _Peeta told Katniss. _" You'll be sleepy in less than half an hour. "_

Katniss groaned, sitting up, _" I don't want to sleep, I'm not tired. "_

Peeta let out a discreet laughter as he added more cream on her leg.

The brunette simply smiled back.

" Y_ou wouldn't be able to fall asleep without medication, " _the boy told her, grabbing her ankle.

She jumped, straight as a pole, _" That was painful, don't do it again. "_

Katniss opened the box and let two pills fall in her palm. She settled the box on the floor and swallowed the medication with the glass of water.

Peeta started swaying her feet around, locating the exact place that was causing her pain.

Once he found it, he used his calloused fingers to push the ball of nerve away. Katniss cried out and kicked him in the hip with her free leg.

The blond fell on his butt, looking astonished.

_" I'm really sorry, it's automatic, my body moved on its own, " _Katniss declared, panting slightly. _" It's a… hum. A defensive system, " _she added, lying on her back again.  
Peeta moved back into the position he was in previously, but crossed his legs, _" That surprised me, " _he chuckled.

Eyeing Katniss' ankle closely, he gave a satisfied nod and pushed the bag of ice down on her ankle, wrapping it around it.

The brunette trembled for a while, but eventually her muscles relaxed.

_" Hey, are you fine with me sleeping here with you? " _the blond asked.

Her grey eyes settled on a point somewhere on the ceiling. The painkillers she took minutes ago were apparently taking effects.

She let her head fall on the side so she could look at Peeta correctly, _" Of course I am, " _she told him in a sleepy voice.

**/**

Peeta took Katniss' watch, from 12 to 3AM, since she was lost into sleep due to the pills.

The night was chilly because of a strong wind, but the blond kept warm by jogging around the block while Finnick stood on the front step of the refuge.

His breath formed a bit of fog when he exhaled, and the sound of his boots hitting the stony ground was revolving in the empty streets surrounding them.

Before sweat could form anywhere on his body, the blond stopped running to sit by his friend.

_" There's nobody out here with us, " _he claimed. _" Not even wild cats or dogs. "  
_Finnick hummed to himself, _" I still feel like somebody is watching us, " _he stated. _" Perhaps from afar. "_

This comment made Peeta look everywhere on the buildings, above the doors, behind the windows and on the roofs. But there was nothing for him to spot. Nothing threatening at least.

_" Cameras? People in the flesh? " _he asked his older friend. _" I don't think there's either of those. "_

Finnick pulled his water bottle out of his backpack and drank half of it, then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

He audibly groaned, and cracked his knuckles, _" Snow knows we're here to get to him, " _he stated. _" I'm sure he's getting ready for our arrival. "  
_Stretching his leg out, his friend sighed, _" And I thought I was the pessimistic one, " _he said, giggling.

The taller blond rolled his eyes but eventually kicked him gently in the ribs, a wide grin expanding on his face.

_" Katniss' guard is almost over, " _Finnick told his friend. _" I still have an hour left though, " _he added, glancing at his bracelet.

He shot a look at Peeta, stared at him behind his eyelashes.

Although he looked tired, his general condition seemed to have gotten better since a couple days.

Even if he couldn't guess the reason of this improvement, he could easily imagine that Katniss probably was part of it. The pair of ex-tributes had been closer, threatened by a possible imminent death.

_" How is she doing by the way? " _he asked while Peeta got up again.  
The blond shrugged, _" Quite fine in my opinion, but she has always been good at hiding her feelings and emotions, " _he replied.

Finnick puckered his lips together and nodded, he wasn't exactly expecting another answer.

_" Well, I'm heading to bed, see you tomorrow, " _Peeta said, his hand on the doorknob. _" Good luck for the rest of your watch. "  
_The other blond smiled to him, grabbed his shoulder, _" Don't even worry about it buddy, see you tomorrow. Sleep tight. "_

**/**

Katniss was sleeping peacefully when Peeta opened the door.

He undressed as discreetly as possible, then checked his prothesis for any bump. He unzipped the vest of his uniform that he was glad he brought during his watch.

The brunette audibly groaned, an arm spread on the boy's mattress.

_" Mh… " _she moaned, grabbing the sheets.

Peeta eyed the small room he had left to lie down, sighed and fell on his knees. He eyed her injured ankle, and was relieved to see it didn't swell during his watch, she would definitely feel better in the morning.

He reached for the switch and pushed it, turning the lights off before lying on his side so he wouldn't bother Katniss.

The brunette snored quietly on her back, her fingertips brushing against the boy's stomach.

A shiver ran through his back as she rubbed the soft fabric of his shirt unconsciously. He knew it meant nothing, but couldn't help focusing on the sensation.

She slowly turned to face him, extending her arm further, setting her palm flat on his belly, _" G'night, "_ she mumbled.

It was too dark for him to be sure of it, but he swore he saw her eyes fluttering open.

_" Good night Katniss, " _he replied.

_**/**_

A light knock on a door woke Peeta up.

_" I'm sorry to disturb you this early, but Mr Boggs said he wanted you to meet in the living room in twenty minutes, " _the youngest host told him.

The blond acknowledged her with a nod, and the girl left quietly.

Katniss had an arm wrapped around his torso, and a leg over his. Peeta couldn't help but smile as he pivoted his head so he could face her.

He cleared his throat, _" Katniss, " _he whispered.

No response.

_" Katniss, we have to get ready, " _he gently insisted, patting the hand on his stomach. _" Come on. "_

She opened an eye, but quickly shut it again, still dazed by the painkillers she took the previous night.

After two minutes, Peeta moved so he could sit up, Katniss' hand falling on his lower belly.

He turned red instantly, from down his neck to his ears.

_" Er, hum…, " _he blurted out. _" Katniss… "_

The girl yawned, stretching her arms, her hand ending on Peeta's hip, _" I'm doin' it, " _she mumbled. _' I swea'… " _

Giggling, Peeta pulled his backpack closer so he could grab his uniform.

Katniss finally opened both of her eyes, her stare foggy and distant, _" It's already morning? " _she asked.

Realizing the position she was in, she jumped back quickly, hitting the back of her head on the wall.

She winced, grabbing the painful spot, _" Ouch, " _she groaned, _" That hurt. "_

The blond bursted out laughing, grabbing his ribs and leaning forwards.

Katniss' eyes widened and she kicked him on the head gently, _" Stop laughing, it really hurt! "_

**_/_**

Gathered around the huge table of the living room, soldiers waited for the late ones so the speech could start.

Boggs was the only one that wasn't seating, but walking in circles around the place, whistling nervously some advertisement song popular in Panem.

Finnick and Peeta were quiet for once, their heads settled on their crossed arms on the wooden surface.

Finally, Leeg 1 and Leeg 2 walked down the stairs to join the rest of the unit.

Coin's secondhand let out a loud sigh and clapped his hands twice, _" Today could be the most important day of our mission, " _he explained, earning the whole squad's attention. _" I talked with engineer Latier during most of the night, and he warned me about the huge amount of traps that have been installed recently. "_

Katniss' head that rested on her best friend's shoulder raised suddenly when she heard this information.

_" There could even be some outside our door for all we know, " _Boggs continued, slapping his palms against the table, surprising some soldiers. _" Beetee says he can't update the Holo fast enough for us to reach the Capitol in less than four days. "_

Paylor frowned, _" Excuse me, but how are we going to make it through that minefield alive? "_

The tall man smirked almost insanely and stared at the rebel leader for a while.

_" We'll try to cover as much distance as we can through the borderline, and once we get cornered, we'll get in the sewers, " _he answered calmly. _" The only problem is… " _

The squad members waited for him to finish his sentence, which took him a while.

_" The Holo won't work, and we don't have any map of those, " _he stated in a dramatic sigh. _" We will be forced to use them blindly. "_

Nobody found the words to reassure the rest of the group about that.

* * *

**NDA : I'm sorry for being late once again.**

**But my dad is moving overseas and I help him packing.**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter &amp; see you in the next one.**

**Bisous.**


	41. Chapter 41 : They're coming for me

**Summary: **

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta instead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?  
" _But Katniss… This is Peeta! You know him… He wouldn't do that! _"  
" _Oh yeah, I know him. I do._ He totally would. "  
She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

* * *

**Chapter 41 : They're coming for me**

After a long silence, Pollux did sign something to his brother Castor, which instantly nodded, grinning.

_" What did he tell you? "_ Katniss asked, cocking an eyebrow.

The cameraman quickly composed himself, and cleared his throat, _" Pollux did work in the tunnels in the past, he says he remember the sewers pretty well, " _he replied, enthusiasm in his voice. _" He is willing to be our map down there. "_

The brunette felt a slight relief running through her system, the muscles in her back and shoulders relaxing progressively.

She pivoted on her heels to look at Coin's secondhand, waiting for a reply of any sort.

He put a hand over his chin dramatically, and started walking in circles, occasionally peeking from under his eyelashes to look at the mute member of the squad.

_" Are you sure he can guide us? " _he asked Castor, putting his hands together in front of him as if he was praying. _" I mean, is he sure he can? "_

Peeta got closer, frowning.

He didn't know anything about the siblings, but would gratefully give a kidney if Pollux could make this 'death-labyrinth' part of the mission shorter.

The man signed again, faster and slicker.

Castor nodded, _" He's a hundred percent sure he can, " _he started, staring at his brother's hands and lips. _" The sewers are basically perpendicular tunnels, and it's easy to travel through them, especially if you're heading to the Capitol. "_

Boggs' eyebrows flew on his forehead, _" Did he really say all of that? Amazing. "_

He gave a vague nod, turned towards Pollux again.

_" But he will only give us directions once we get around the Capitol, " _he continued. _" He says that when he worked in there, they would never send him too far. "_

Boggs let out a sigh, cracked his fingers and his neck.

This information was good, but not helpful at the moment. Still it was reassuring to have someone who knew how to travel the sewers.

Pollux suddenly put his right index finger up, his eyes and mouth wide open.

_" Hum, is there something else? " _Coin's secondhand asked. _" What is this about? "_

Castor motioned for him to stop talking and paid extreme attention to his brother's signing.

_" My brother says that he knows that we need to follow the North-West to get closer to the Capitol, " _the man said.

The head of the squad gave a strong nod, and rearranged his backpack.

_" So? " _Castor asked. _" What will be our next move? "_

Boggs motioned vaguely with his hand to the ground, _" We're going in the sewers. "_

**/ / /**

Peeta was the last one to enter the sewers.

Before he could start descending, he looked at the sky for a moment, wondering if he would ever get to see it again, and closed the entrance.  
It smelled like stagnant water and pollution in there, but at least, they were a bit safer.

He climbed down the ladder, right after Finnick, and turned on his torch.

Once they reached the bottom, they waited for new directions.

Boggs tried to start the Holo, but it instantly turned off.  
He searched through his pockets and pulled a compass out. Smiling, he pointed towards one tunnel, and nodded.

They walked for hours, their boots covered in dirt, water flowing inside and wetting their socks.

Nobody complained, it was easier than avoiding death traps.

/ / /

The formation stopped when Castor stated that his brother had found a place for them to sleep in.

It was warm inside, and a security light allowed the soldiers to turn their flashlights off.

Katniss sat with her back against the hard stone of the sewers, her legs spread in front of her.

Peeta was too exhausted to talk, but found the strength to kick his boots and socks off his feet before lying down on the opposite side of the room.  
He was hungry too, but his eyelids felt too heavy for him to search for a can of food in his bag.

Finnick was right next to Katniss, rubbing his hands together, _" Aren't you going to eat something? "  
_The brunette shrugged, _" I don't know if I want to, " _she sighed. _" All I'm sure about is that I'm glad I'm not standing up. "_

Remembering her injury, she pulled her pants up her leg to check her ankle.

There was a purplish mark, but the area didn't swell.

Peeta's friend noticed it, _" Did you injure yourself? "  
__" Yeah, yesterday, " _she replied. _" But Peeta took care of it, " _she added. _" It will probably be completely fine tomorrow. "_

Finnick nodded and opened his can of potatoes. He picked out his fork and ate his first one, munching lazily.

_" You're sure you don't want some? " _he asked, handing the can to Katniss. _" It's kinda tasty too. "_

They ended up sharing the can while Boggs, Gale and Jackson discussed together.

_" Do you think they ever get to think about something else but this mission? " _the blond asked, chewing a bite. _" I even wonder if they ever want to forget about it for a minute… "_

Katniss was surprised by this question.

_" Wait, you can? "_

Putting the can on the floor, Finnick turned his head so he could look at her, _" Of course, I can. "_

She wished she could be able to do the same thing, and get her mind set on anything but this suicidal mission.  
She really couldn't.

_" How? "_

He let out a quiet laugh, _" Annie pops in my head, " _he simply said. _" Then memories of our wedding too, and it's enough to keep my spirit up. "_

Staring at her fingers, Katniss felt embarrassed she didn't guess, and somehow jealous.

_" Don't you think about your mom and Prim? " _the blond asked.  
Katniss smiled sadly, _" I do, but it makes me feel guilty about leaving them behind. "_

She was afraid of not coming back.

_" So it doesn't exactly help me, " _she continued. _" And I have nobody else, nobody that could make me think about more pleasurable things. "  
_Finnick curved an eyebrow at that statement, _" Are you sure? "_

The brunette froze for a moment. Was he supposed to know that about her?

_" Well, yeah, I'm pretty certain, " _she retorted coldly.

Her teammate hummed to himself then grabbed the can again, and ate the one remaining potato at the bottom of it.

_" I thought Haymitch, Gale and Effie would have made the cut, " _he told her. _" Peeta too. "_

She felt a chill run up her back.

_" I do care about them, but it doesn't mean it helps me. They are all involved in this mission in some way, " _she stated harshly. _" And I'm still not sure about him. "  
_Finnick smiled, _" By him, do you mean Peeta? "_

Katniss settled her hands on her thighs, tried to remain calm and composed.

She nodded his question off.

_" After all that you have been through, you still choose to believe Snow? " _the blond asked. _" That's quite surprising. "  
_The brunette started shaking her head, _" No I don't, " _she blurted out. _" There is no way I could. "_

Finnick opened his mouth but shut it quickly when he realized how Katniss looked.

She was grabbing her uniform, pulling on it while she rocked back and forth again and again.

It was obvious to him that what happened in the tributes' center still had affect on her.  
And he felt really bad for pushing her this far.

_" Hey, I'm sorry Katniss, " _he murmured. _" I shouldn't have. "_

Her grey eyes stared at him from under her eyelashes, and Finnick moved back unconsciously.

She didn't look like herself anymore.

_" Sorry. "_

His apologies were useless, but there was nothing else he could think of doing.

_" I really am sorry, " _he repeated, putting his hands up in defense.

Katniss let out some sort of grunt, _" I will kill him with my bare hands, " _she stated, grabbing her knees.

Her head was full of questions and images, and she couldn't make out what was real or true.

It was a giant mess she couldn't avoid since it was part of her.

_" He lied to me, " _she continued, grinning. _" He fucking!, "_ she blurted out, angry. "_ He fucking lied to me! "_

Peeta that was dozing, opened his eyes, startled.

Katniss' voice was resonating in the stone-walled room. He couldn't make the words out, but there was more than a hint of rage in her screams

He felt as if he was having a nightmare, his body reacting way too slowly.

_" What happened? " _he asked Finnick, getting in a sitting position again. _" What's wrong? "_

He noticed Katniss rocking back and forth, and his eyes widened. If that was the fruit of his imagination, his subconscious was extremely realistic.

In no time, he was on his knees in front of her, placing his hands on top of hers, _" Katniss? " _

She pushed his hands away.  
It wasn't aggressive, but it turned his blood to ice.

_" Just leave me alone, " _she muttered.

' "Peeta was in front of you, smiling while you got taken away by peacekeepers, he didn't do anything, he just stared. He uses you, " Snow said. '

She shook her head, _" No, this isn't real, this isn't real, " _she said, her voice trembling, her fingers tensing up. _" It isn't real! "_

' " He still smiled as you got lifted from the arena's floor onto the hovercraft. He looked up at you, and did nothing, he just stared. He has been lying all along. " '

_" No, no, no, " _she winced, hitting her temples with her closed fists. _" Stop it, stop it! "_

' " When he realized you were an hostage, he didn't care, he was still smiling. He didn't do anything to get you back. And when they rescued you, he wished it wasn't the case. He doesn't care about you, " Snow stated. " You mean nothing to this boy. " '

_" Stop it, stop it!, " _she cried out, her toes curling in her wet socks. _" Shut up! "_

A body surrounded her, warm and strong, immobilizing her.

_" Katniss, please listen to me, " _Peeta said. _" Focus on my voice please. "_

She tried pushing him off her, but he held on tight, his arms steady around her shoulders.

_" I just want it to stop, " _she wailed. _" These voices, I just want them to leave me alone, " _she added. _" I can't take it anymore. "_

Peeta's heart clenched in his chest. Katniss had to endure these on her own for weeks, for months.

_" I'm right here, " _he told her, decreasing his hold around her. _" You are not alone. "_

This wasn't was she needed to hear. This was anything but enough.

_" I can't, " _she cried. _" I can't take it. "_

' " And all these intimate moments you shared were just for show. He did it only to save himself, never because he had true feelings for you. He faked everything, " Snow continued.

_" I just want it to stop, " _Katniss managed to say, looking up at Peeta. _" I can't take it anymore, please make it stop. "_

She covered her face with her trembling hands, her whole body jolting.

Peeta settled his hands on top of her head and brought her closer to him, pressing her head on his chest.

_" Make it stop, " _she repeated.

Slowly she removed her hands, and her body gave in, falling in the blond's space. He wrapped his arm around her back instantly, rubbed it gently.

The sound of his steady heartbeat revolved in the girl's skull, and the voices were gone.

It was so familiar to hear this fluttering sound, it felt like home.

Her fingers curled up his uniform and grabbed his shoulder blades as she closed her eyes.

_" I will always be by your side, " _Peeta told her. _" And even if you're the one needing it now, I need it just as much. "_

Katniss understood what it meant, and it calmed her down.

_" I need you Katniss, " _he added in a breath.

Exhaustion was running through her relaxing body, and on the melody of Peeta's heart, she drifted into sleep.

/ / /

Katniss woke up, and looked around her, lost.

Her head was resting on Peeta's shoulder, that was lying on the ground.

Gale crouched next to her, _" How are you feeling Catnip? " _he asked, frowning.  
_" Better I guess, " _she replied, her voice hoarse and broken.

There was an uneasiness in the way she talked, and an ache at the back of her throat.

She coughed twice, rubbed her eyes sleepily.

Her best friend smiled, lightly squeezed her shoulder, _" That's a nice thing to hear. "_

He told her that they wouldn't leave now, a huge part of the squad still being asleep.

She nodded vaguely, yawned.

Gale moved back and left the room, probably on watch.

Peeta was snoring peacefully, a protective arm wrapped around her waist.

She couldn't move away without waking him up, but it wasn't like she really wanted or needed to do that.

There was not much she remembered about the previous night, apart from crying and screaming.

She guessed it was a good thing to ignore the details.

Eventually she lowered her head back onto his shoulder, and let herself drift into sleep once again.

/ / /

_" Katniss… " _

The girl grunted, rubbed her eyes but remained lying down.

Peeta's body was warm below her, his arms holding her tightly in place.

_" Katniss… " _the voice continued.

She was too drowsy to recognize who was talking to her, but there was no rush in the intonation.

It sounded suave, mellow, and almost appealing.

" Katniss. "

It grew more insistent and she popped an eye open.

The whole squad was asleep, except for Jackson and Paylor guarding outside the room.

When the fighting advisor walked in front of the entrance, she motioned to her, _" Did you call for me? " _

Paylor curved an eyebrow, and shook her head, _" Hm, not that I know. "_

Perhaps it was her imagination.

_" It's still very early, you can go back to sleep, " _the woman added.

Before she could close her eyes, the voice was back, _" Katniss! "_

Jolting up, she sat and woke Peeta up in the process.

_" Is everything okay? " _he asked, his voice hoarse and wavy.

Katniss looked around her, breathless, _" Someone's calling my name. "_

Peeta waited for the voice to come back.

Nothing.

Then there was a huge metallic noise revolving through the pipes, traveling through the tunnels. It became extremely loud, and it seemed to come from everywhere.

In no time, every soldier was on their feet, weapons at the ready.

Boggs walked outside of the room, finding Jackson and Paylor, _" Do you have a visual? "  
_Jackson shook her head, _" No, but there is definitely something out there! "_

The noises seemed to creep closer to their position. But above the metallic noise, there was something that sounded nothing like a human.

Some kind of hissing.

_" What the fuck is going on? " _Coin's secondhand cursed. _" We're out of here! " _

Without any question needed, the squad moved towards the Capitol's direction, unable to tell where the noises were coming from.

_" Katniss ! " _

This time, she wasn't the only one to hear it, this voice calling her name.

She slowed down, making Finnick and Peeta go back to get her.

_" They're coming for me, " _she blurted out, grabbing onto her bow. _" They're coming. "_

They pulled her forward and remained running behind their teammates.

Noises grew even louder, the hissing sounding more and more like a snake.

The group had to halt at a crossroad, almost sweltering.

_" We have to keep going, " _Leeg 1 said, at the rear of the cortege. _" Whatever this is, it's creeping on us! "_

She pushed through the crowd.

The roof opened before the soldiers' eyes, letting some sort of ray through the sewers.

Leeg 1's mouth was gaping open as the skin of her face started melting, exposing the bones of her skull.

Her sister screamed from the top of her lungs, and it resonated through the multitude of tunnels.

Pure despair.

Jackson suddenly started walking around the ray, _" We have to continue! "_

The rest of the soldiers followed her, but Leeg 2 didn't.

_" I will give you some more time, " _she announced, tears running down her cheeks. _" Please use it with caution, and good luck. "  
_Paylor ran to pull her by the wrist, _" What are you talking about? Hurry up and come! "_

The younger woman shook her head.

_" This can't be, you have to come with us!, " _Paylor wailed, pointing to the rest of the group. _" You can't do this! "  
_Leeg 2 smiled, _" This is my choice, now go! "_, she cried out.

_/ / /_

Once the ray was avoided, the soldiers ran again, sweat running down their foreheads.

The sound of the boots hitting the wet ground was infuriating.  
The lack of oxygen was burning the squad members' throats and lungs but they couldn't even think about stopping.

Peeta was a mess, he was trembling from head to toes, adrenalin the only thing that kept him going.  
He thought they would be safer down there, but it had been filled with death traps.

The formation took a left at an intersection.

Time suddenly froze as an explosion detonated, Boggs being projected back onto Gale's torso.

Katniss' best friend stared in horror at the leader's legless body over his.

_" Agh, " _the man cried, almost ripping Gale's uniform with his hands. _" You must leave me, " _he winced.

Gale shook his head, unable to make any sound.

_" You have to!, "_ Boggs winced. "_ Take the Holo! ", _he added, nodding.

Paylor obeyed and kneeled in front of him, unwrapping the watch from his wrist.

She got back on her feet and staggered dangerously.

_" Please end this, " _Boggs begged, his fingers losing their grip on Gale's shirt. _" Please… "_

Katniss passed by him without a glance, and started running again.  
She couldn't see him being killed. Her eyes had already witnessed too many things.

Peeta and Finnick helped moving Boggs' body away from Gale, and left as well.

Gale puked his guts out as soon as he stood up, avoiding Coin's secondhand's body by luck.

_" D-Do you want me to do it? " _Jackson asked him. _" I-I think I can… do it. "_

The fearless woman's hands were shaking around her gun as she said it.

_" It's fine, I'll do it, " _Gale assured her.

The rest of the team ran away, leaving the two men alone.

And a minute later, there was one less member in the squad.

/ / /

Their feet were hurting but they sprinted through the tunnels, Pollux guiding them as accurately as he could.  
Stagnant water splashed everywhere, filled the soldier's boots.

Whoever was following them wasn't giving up yet.

_" Careful! " _Finnick yelled, putting an abrupt stop to their rush.

Another intersection, and along with it, an other possible trap.

Paylor kept pushing the 'ON' button on the Holo without result.

_" I think we should follow the walls, " _Castor suggested, catching his breath. _" Running through isn't a good idea. "_

Paylor lead the way, choosing the left side.

Every step could be her last, so she took her time, checking her surroundings.

The rest of the squad followed her, reached the other side safely.

_" Katniss! "_

The hissing was back, calling Katniss' name.

She jumped so she could reach her teammates. Peeta went as fast as he could, knowing Mitchell and Homes still had to go through.

Something appeared in front of their eyes, unlike anything they ever saw.

A dozen of creatures.

Their eyes were extremely small, their teeth and nails longer than the norm. Also showing burned skin and a tail, they looked like chimeras out of nightmares.

_" WHAT THE FUCK?! " _Homes shouted, taking a risk by running through the intersection.

He hurt his ankle and fell face first, crawling desperately towards his allies.

A creature jumped towards him, but Mitchell kicked it with his elbow, quickly pulling his friend by the arm afterwards.

Some soldiers had already ran away, but Finnick got his trident and ran in, hitting the mutation in the ribcage.

Black blood flooded out of the opening.

_" We have to help!, " _Peeta screamed, taking an arrow out of his bag.

He aimed for a mutt getting too close for comfort and aimed for his head.

Gale jumped in as well, shooting his handgun at the same creature.

_" On your left!, " _Finnick warned him.

Katniss' best friend dodged the attack almost miraculously, and once Homes was out of the creatures' reach, ran away with the rest of the soldiers.

He shot in his back to slow their opponents down, hoping to gain some precious seconds.

The maze of tunnels didn't seem to end, and Peeta prayed that an exit was near, or they wouldn't hold long enough.

_" Look for a way out!, " _he yelled, his fake leg getting heavier with every step he took.

/ / /

Pollux had somehow managed to sign something to his brother.

_" He says we'll find a ladder soon if we keep moving forward!, " _Castor stated, pointing in front of him.

Katniss had never ran this fast since her first time in the arena.

Fear was stiffening her muscles, her lungs were aching for a pause, but all she could see was the end of this tunnel. The exit.

As he was running, Peeta prepared an explosive arrow, and positioned it in his crossbow.

He stopped and took a deep breath, staring at the mutts crawling on the walls, the roof and on the ground.

Closing an eye, he aimed for the one that was closer, and pressed the trigger.

He was pushed back by the detonation, archly fell on his side.

The creatures were moaning, their skins turning black, so he stood up and ran again.

Nobody cared where they were running, and as she stepped over a strange cobblestone, Paylor triggered another trap.

Katniss almost fell as the floor opened in front of her.

She couldn't see the bottom of it, standing on her tip toes.

Finnick pulled her back as the rest of the squad cornered it, _" You're okay, you're fine, " _he told her, panting.

He let go of her waist and pushed her aside.

She walked in Peeta's steps as Finnick closed the line.

There weren't a lot of mutts left after the explosion, but a few remained.

_" We found it!, " _Castor shouted, helping his brother on the first step of the ladder. _" Don't stop, don't look back, " _he instructed him.  
Katniss reached the group, checked behind her back, _" We have to hold them back! "_

Finnick was already fighting a creature with his trident, his feet too close to the hole that just formed.

Peeta got near him, helped him as he could, using his bare fists.

Katniss shot an arrow that killed the second one.

_" I can't kill the other one, it's too risky! " _she cried out, _" You have to get away from him! "  
_Finnick yelled, pushed the mutt away, _" It's too narrow anyway!, " _he replied, pushing it again.

She remembered reading a part of her sister's book where she shot a tribute's hand to save Peeta.  
But she wasn't sure she could be this lucky again.

_" Katniss, come on, we have to go!, " _Gale shouted, already climbing the ladder.  
She shook her head, her lips bleeding from biting them too much, _" I can't leave them! "  
__" We have to go!, " _her best friend insisted, _" NOW! "_

Peeta pushed her towards the exit, kicking the mutt in the chest with his fake foot.

_" I won't leave you!, " _she wailed, getting her handgun out. _" I won't do that! "  
_Finnick was out of stamina, his legs trembling under his weight, _" Stop arguing and go! "_

Katniss pulled the trigger of her gun, hitting the creature in the neck.

It started screaming, moving around.

Peeta pulled a knife out of his belt and jumped on the mutt, slashing his throat open.

He hit it again, and again, until the head got disconnected from the body.

Katniss held his shoulders, tugged him back, _" It's dead, let's go! " _she cried. _" We don't know if others survived, we need to go! "_

The movement of his arm slowed down, and he stood up, hands covered in black liquid.

/ / /

Finnick put the slab back on the manhole, kept pushing on it, making sure it was really sealed.

The squad was in shock, sitting or lying on the ground, catching their breaths.

Katniss took a bottle of water out of her bag, and cleaned Peeta's hand, that was too taken aback to do it himself.

_" It's over now, " _she told herself, _" It's over, it's over. "_

* * *

**NDA : I sincerely apologize for being astronomically late.**

**I hope this chapter pleased you,**

**And I'll see you in the next one.**

**Bisous. **


	42. Apologies and explanations (I'm back)

Hi guys,

I'm sorry for the lack of chapters but I had to buy a new computer because my cat kicked a cup containing coffee on my previous one (that little bastard haha).  
So yeah, I lost all the chapters I had written, and since I can't get these documents back because my new laptop isn't compatible, I have to re-write them all over again.

I am going back to writing, and hopefully, the publication schedule will become more regular in a week or two.

Uni isn't helping either, I have tons of essays to write, notes to re-type, but I swear I'll do my best.

Being originally from Paris and having my closest friends and mom living there, I also had to sturggle with the recent attacks on the city.  
Thankfully nobody I know got hurt, but my heart breaks for every single victim.

I'll see you very soon for the next chapter of this fiction.

Thank you so much for your patience,  
Bisous.


	43. Chapter 43 : Are you coming to the tree?

**Summary :**

What if Coin convinced Haymitch, Plutarch and the tributes to save Peeta intead of Katniss during the Quarter Quell? What would happen?

" But Katniss... This is Peeta! You know him... He wouldn't do that! "  
" Oh yeah, I know him. I do. He totally would. "

She laughed and turned away from Haymitch.

**Chapter 42 : Are you coming to the tree?**

_" It's over, " _Katniss repeated, crouching in front of Peeta.

The blond was shaking his head eratically, muttering some unintelligible words, blood dripping from his hands.  
Katniss took her backpack and opened it, searching for a cloth, ended up using one of her undershirts.  
She took a water bottle as well, and poured a large quantity on the top while Peeta's fingers released his knife, a metallic noise harassing their ears.

The mockingjay took a deep breath, _" You did good, " _she told Peeta as she gently started rubbing his hands with the wet piece of clothing.

Blue eyes looked up at her, lips quivering uncontrollably as the tension slowly left the ex-tribute's body. _" Did I really? " _he asked, his voice almost inaudible.

She nodded, insisting on the boy's knuckles and nails where the black liquid got stuck, started to dry, _" I promise. "_  
Peeta inhaled through his nose, his nostrils flaring, _ " What if they were just desperate because of what they were? "_  
Katniss stopped the movements of her hands, stared at him, _" That doesn't change the fact that they wanted us dead. "_

After that Peeta didn't say a word, and stared at Finnick, sitting in front of him.

It made him calm down considerately, arms falling down along his sides as Katniss still worked on cleaning his hands.

The blond looked at her, the girl that wanted him dead a couple days earlier, that fought against her own mind just to give him a second chance.  
Peeta felt like he didn't deserve so much, Katniss probably would've been just fine if he wasn't a part of her memories and past anymore. He was glad she acknowledged him again though, he wouldn't dare complaining.

Someone coughing brought him back to reality, and he blinked repeatedly, searching for the source of the noise.  
It was Finnick, that seemed to have trouble getting oxygen in his system, his face red just like veiny neck.

He looked as if he was experiencing a silent argument in his head, mumbling and frowning. When the blond saw his friend reach inside of his bag and retrieve a piece of rope, a weight drifted in his stomach.

This boy had always been there for him, even when he was the one needing help. His generosity was a rare thing, especially from someone that was supposed to kill him in an advertisement show called " The Hunger Games".  
Still, Finnick never failed to stand up for him, defended him from everyone, always ready to lend a frendly hand.

Peeta shifted his attention back on Katniss, that was busy cleaning him up, _" I think I can handle it from there, thank you. "_

The girl showed a little smile, and let herself sit on the sidewalk, drinking from the bottle she used previously. She emptied it in her hands and drenched her face, rubbing the exhaustion away.

Members of the squad stood there, in the middle of the street, halfway through the Capitol, in shock. Nobody knew when the time would come for them to start walking again, to keep this expedition going.  
None of them was ready for that, nor for whatever was next.

**/ / /**

Once he had precautiously removed every trace of the black liquid on his hands and forearms, Peeta got up, his thighs shaken by spasms, and made his way to Finnick.

_" Hey buddy, " _he gently said, without any ounce of happiness in voice.

The boy settled his fresh cleaned hands on Finnick's shoulders, and kneeled in front of him. But hands were still knotting, tying and untying relentlessly, showing no mercy for the ex-tribute's wounded knuckles.

Peeta bent forwards, grabbing Finnick's left arm with strength_, " Finnick buddy, " _he gently said. _" Look at me. "_

His blue eyes were red from crying so much, awfully matching the color of the blood on his fingers.

He was thinking about Annie, about how there was more chances for him to die than to come back to her. And it was torturing his mind, unforgivably crushing his hopes to shreds.

_" Take deep breaths, " _Peeta instructed, rubbing his friend's tense upper back and arms.  
Finnick chuckled, but there was no joy in his voice, _" What if you were right? " _he stated more than asked. _" What if we don't make it out alive? "_

Peeta bit the inside of his cheeks, massaging the junction between his neck and shoulder. Being frightened by that idea himself, he was in no position to tell him wrong.

It took him a while to find the right words, _" We got further that I expected, " _his voice was calm and low, almost soothering. _" And we'll keep going until the end. "_  
Finnick sniffed loudly, finally meeting Peeta's glance, _" Do you truly believe in what you just said? "_

And Peeta couldn't confirm this, there were lots of traps on their way, awaiting for someone to trigger it.

He gave a strong nod, fingers rubbing circles on Finnick's tense muscles.

/ / /

Paylor was leading the way, after Coin instructed her to take Bogg's pending position as a group leader.  
The formation progressed very prudently, and therefore, slower than before the sewer episode. They lost three members in a dozen of minutes, and the remaining ones' mental health had gotten a severe hit.

_" Thank you for earlier, " _Finnick told Peeta, making his trident roll between his trembling fingers.  
The older boy gave a weak smile, _" You're welcome. "_

There were few exchanging of words as the squad kept walking through the empty streets surrounding the Capitol.  
Not a single human life seemed to be present, except theirs and a couple crows and pigeons fluttering their wings above their heads.

_" It's so quiet, " _Peeta breathed out. _" You'd almost think it's peaceful. "_  
Finnick pouted, _" If it wasn't for all those sounds the Holo makes. "_

Paylor had retrieved the tool from Coin's secondhand's agonizin body, and the two ex-tributes walked right beside her.  
The machine produced a light sound every time it detected a new ambush, and made their pace even more gradual.

_" I've got a call from Beetee, let's have a short break, " _the fight-advisor instructed, instantly pushing on her earpiece to understand the engineer's rushed words.

Katniss settled on the pavement next to Gale, _" Are you alright? "_ she asked, genuine concern in her voice. _" I know what you had to do. "_  
Her best friend sounded a hundred years old when he replied _" Killing Boggs you mean? "_. He extended his legs in front of him, stared at his feet, _" It was better than to leave him to these... things. "_

That totally made sense, but having to push the trigger in front of an ally was something that required a lot of strength.  
Katniss never doubted Gale's potential, but she couldn't help worrying about the feelings he kept personal most of the time.

Opening his backback, Gale turned to her, _" What about you? "_  
_" What do you mean? " _Katniss replied, accepting the piece of dried apple he offered her. _" I'm as shocked as everyone else, but I'm okay. "_  
Gale shook his head, chewing, _" These creatures were clearly after you. "_

She bit into the fruit, finding the flavour almost too sweet.

Snow undoubtedly knew they were close to reaching him, and the surprise effect they hoped they'd still have was most likely gone with that.  
It didn't matter if she was the main target, she came to accept that. What bothered her was that her presence in the group endangered it.

_" It sure was terrifying at the moment, " _Katniss admitted after swallowing her quarter of apple. _" And now I realize it means that Snow knows we're coming for his head. "_  
Gale cackled, _" There was no way he didn't aprehend a raid from the rebels Catnip, " _he laughed, throwing a couple a dried raisins in his mouth. _" He might be evil, but he's not stupid. "_

/ / /

Paylor was done talking with District 13's engineer, and explained to the rest of the squad that the next two miles were going to be difficult.  
Apparently, Snow had ordered some of his subordinates to install more death traps, which was going to slow the group's progression significantly.

She wiped her sweaty forehead with her sleeve, _" I know that all of us are still frightened by this morning's events, but this mission has to continue, " _she stated in a firm voice. _" Let's get this done soldiers. "_

The members stood up and followed her careful steps towards Snow's residence, still a couple days ahead of them.

Finnick yawned, stretching his arms above his head, _" I feel like we've been awake for weeks, " _he sighed, handing his trident to his friend.  
Peeta accepted the weapon, retracted it, _" Or trapped into some sort of fictional parallel universe. "_  
The older boy curved an eyebrow at that, _" Do you mean Hell? "_

It had been a while since it last happened, but the two ex-tributes broke into a genuine laughter, almost too loudly for the situation they were in. Peeta grabbed Finnick's shoulder as his body bent forward, making his walk pattern less straight and regular.

Mitchel and Homes gave them a side look, not quite understanding how this exchange even got close to be funny.

But they didn't care, the odds of them dying in the next days were high, so they figured they'd at least try to make them count.

/ / /

The end of the morning had been quiet and slow-paced, without any major trouble. Paylor gave the squad hald an hour to eat and rest.

Katniss and Gale had joined Peeta and Finnick, all feasting over green beans and cooked mushrooms.

_" How long until we reach that shop? " _Finnick asked, pushing his fork inside a can.  
Gale pulled out his paper map, chewing and frowning seriously, _" If we keep this rhythm up, I guess we could get there in two days. "_  
_" Which day is it anyway? " _Katniss asked, rubbing her sore ankle above her uniform.  
Finnick shrugged, _" I honestly have no idea, I lost all sense of time with this mission. "_

Peeta kept eating quietly, tiredness suddenly hitting him all over his body. The stiffness of his back and shoulders was extending to his limbs, but he didn't dare complaining. At least, he was still breathing and healthy.

Once he reached the bottom of his own can of beans, he lied on his back, his arms flat by his sides, looking up at the large grey clouds in the sky.

_" I think it might rain soon, " _he muttered under his breath, closing his weary eyes.

He could still hear his companions' voices as he heplessly drifted into sleep.

Katniss made a sound close to a giggle, _" It's tempting to join him in his nap time, " _she stated. _" I might give it a go. "_  
Gale put his map back in the inside pocket of his jacket, _" Then do it quick, barely twenty minutes left. "_

/ / /

The journey in the border of the Capitol continued, Paylor constantly frowning and checking the Holo.  
The air was humid and heavy, turned out Peeta was correct and that a storm was coming, wind whistling against the stones of the empty houses of the area they walked through.

Cornering a trap that Boggs had told Paylor about, the members of the squad followed her steps quietly, eager to get this mission done.

It wasn't necessarily walking all day long that was tiring, but the constant fear of being pierced with a lethal weapon hidden along the streets.  
Knowing that each step could be their last was a tremendous weight on the soldiers' shoulders and mind.

First drops of rain started pouring, and within a couple minutes, it became heavy, blinding the group's vision.

_" I know this isn't easy, " _Paylor shouted over the sound of grounding thunder, _" But we have to make more progress, we've lost enough time today! "_

The sand below Peeta's feet was soaked and a dark shade of grey, sticking to his boots. He could barely see further than Pollux, walking right in front of him, so he strated jogging.

Lightning stroke to their right, _" Please follow each other up close, " _Paylor instructed, a hand over her eyes. _" I swear we're close to a refuge! "_

She was glad Beetee's invention was waterproof, but the blue hologram was barely visible in this deluge.  
Squinting, she turned left at an intersection, walking in the middle of the sidewalk.

_" We'll get there faster if we take a detour, seems like there are close to no traps this way, " _Paylor explained, her voice breaking.

The group formed a more compact formation, allowing the speed of their deplacements to increase significantly.  
Peeta kept his eyes glued to whoever's backback was right in front of him, and jogged next to Finnick and Jackson.

/ / /

The second they knocked on the door of the shelter, it opened, a couple inviting them in instantly.

_" Oh my, you're drenched, " _the woman cried out, handing Paylor and Gale some towels. _" Please make yourself comfortable. "_  
Her husband stepped in front of her, _" Where is Boggs? " _he asked, hints of impatience in his voice.

Silence hang in the entrance of the house for a while, the sound of drops of water hitting the ground the only thing disturbing it.

_" He died this morning, " _Paylor finally announced, bowing her head formally. _" We lost him to some creatures in the sewers. "_

The man mouthed 'mutts' before taking a step back, staggering slightly.

Paylor cleared her throat, _" My deepest condoleances, I'm sorry. "_

It appeared that this man used to go to school with Boggs, and even shared a job with him before the revolution started.  
He talked with the fight assistant, shared a cup of warm tea with her as well.

Peeta rubbed his head with his towel, a knot forming in his stomach.

He wasn't close to Coin's secondhand, nor to Leeg 1 or Leeg 2, he couldn't even remember hearing their full names. But it occured to him that their deaths would affect innocent people.

A hand on his shoulder brought him back to reality, _" Hey, there's tea and coffee, " _Finnick told him. _" Let's have some before it gets cold. "_  
He followed his friend to the living room, feeling dizzy, _" Yeah, sorry, I was somewhere else. "_  
Finnick gave a faint smile, retrieving a cup of coffee,_ " Now's not the time to apologize, now's the time to drink. "_

There was an ache in Peeta's chest, stirring him from the inside right between his lungs. So when the warmth of the tea found his throat, he practically purred in relief, feeling the tension in his back unravel.

He walked towards a couch where he dropped heavily, barely managing to keep the liquid in the mug he was holding.  
Finnick joined him, sighing, his shoulders relaxing as they found the back of the sofa.

Peeta had slightly burnt his tongue, and blew on the fuming tea gently, sending small waves crashing against the round edges. His fingers recovered a normal color, further from blue and closer to his skin tone.

_" Tomorrow's going to be tough on us, " _Finnick stated to his right, extending his legs while groaning. _" Paylor is going to make us cover as many distance as possible. "_  
The younger victor gave a single nod,_ " She sure will, so we better get some good rest tonight, " _he replied before taking a huge sip from his cup.

They made little conversation until dinner time, where they feasted over cooked potatoes, carots and chicken.

It felt as if they pushed an invisible pause button, all gathered around a cosy table decorated with candles and bouquets of fake flowers. Even eating meat felt like a normal thing as every person avoided mentioning the revolution or anything similar to it.

The host brought a bottle of liquor, probably convinced that most of his guests wouldn't have the chance to taste it again, and poured some in each and every glass on the table.

_" To the future, " _he claimed, lifting his own glass, a sad smile on his chapped lips.

The voices of the dozen of squad members echoed his, and it made a shiver run down Peeta's back.

/ / /

Another bottle of liquor, a less fancy one, had been opened.

Homes and Jackson started dancing at some point, to a soundless music that might have been playing in their inhibited brains.

Peeta watched them swirling clumsily on the carpet of the living room, his own glass still half full in his hand. He had been drunk once with Haymitch, and knew better than to swallow his liquor quickly. There was no way he'd let himself feel as bad as he did that time, especially in the Capitol.

His eyes found Katniss, sitting between Gale's legs, on the floor as he massaged her shoulders, crouching from the chair he was on. There was an hint of redness on her plump cheeks, and in the dim lightning, her grey eyes looked even clearer.

_" Are you, are you, coming to the tree? " _she hummed to herself, bobbling her head faintly. _" Where they strung up a man, they said who murdered three. "_

The blond lost his train of thoughts, his mouth opening as he stopped moving, his glass halfway between his mouth and his lap.

He remembered his father telling him about Katniss' mother's voice, how entrancing it was. If she was even remotively close to having the same as her daughter's, it didn't surprise him that he fell in love instantly.  
It occured to him that he wasn't the only one captivated by the brunette, but his vision was blurry, except for her.

_" No stranger would it be, " _she sang more distincly,_ " If we met, at midnight in the hanging tree. "_

The dancers were staring down at her, in a weird position, hands still linked, focused on appreciating the soft melody engulfing the room.

Peeta's hand started shaking, and he settled his glass down on the floor in urgence, his heart pounding with force, his pulse reaching his temples.

Katniss closed her eyes, _" Are you, are you, coming to the tree? Where a dead man called out, for his love to flee. "_

Peeta heard muffled sobbing sounds, and realized Finnick was crying, fingers trembling against his mouth.  
The blond rubbed his back, unable to break the silence that surrounded Katniss' caressing tune to comfort him verbally.

_" Strange things did happen here no stranger would it be, if we met, at midnight in the hanging tree. "_

/ / /

Cressida had been the only person to not be hypnothized by Katniss' voice, pointing a camera towards the mockingjay, softly walking around the room to get a better angle.

She was putting the heavy object in her backback, as the atmosphere in the shelter carefully turned back to normal.

Peeta felt like he had been listening to the brunette singing for hours, but it felt as if he didn't get enough. Her soothing notes had pushed every question troubling his mind aside for a while, allowing him to feel more peaceful than he had been in years.

Still rubbing his friend's back, he couldn't take his eyes away from Katniss, that was drinking her liquor as if nothing happened.  
His stare travelled down her body, and he realized she was massaging her hurt ankle with her available hand, thumb applying pressure in small circles.

_" Are you okay? " _he finally managed to enunciate, still looking at Katniss.  
Finnick made a vague hand gesture, _" I am. " _His voice was quivering, but as calm as it ever was. _" This was ethereal, " _he added, trying a smile. _" I wish Annie could've witnessed it as well. "_

Peeta bit the inside of his cheeks, grabbing his arm. There were no words he felt like he could use to reply to that, none that could be comforting without being too hopeful.  
The weight of death was constantly hanging above their heads, and he didn't have the strength, nor the courage, to make his friend more insecure.

Finnick cleared his throat, patted Peeta's hand and finished his glass, _" She will definitely hear that, "_ he stated, wiping his mouth.  
Cressida's soft voice came out of nowhere, _" I taped it, and I'll make sure the footage reaches District 13 my dawn. "_

The ex tribute looked up at her, and thanked her profusely, joining his hands together and bowing his head ceremonially, a grin extending on his lips.

Peeta got up, leaving the two to their own conversation about the filmmaker's gears and connection with the District.

He settled down in front of Katniss, _" Your voice is beautiful, " _were the only words he could find.  
She smiled, putting some bangs behind her ears_, " Thank you, " _she simply answered, still massaging her foot.  
_" Does it still hurt? " _Peeta asked, frowning seriously. _" I still have some cream in my bag if you need some. "_

/ / /

Peeta had climbed upstairs and settled for a simple bunk in a large room. He undressed and realized their hosts had provided each bed with a basin full of clean water and a bar of soap.

Sighing in relief, he grabbed the small piece of tissue that went along with the package and plundged it in the water.  
He rubbed the dirt and sweat off his tired and greasy body, through his hair before grabbing the soap.

It felt like a new page of his life, and they weren't close to Snow's mansion yet. There was a chance he wouldn't make it until the end, but he was willing to do everything he could to try.  
Fighting was a thing he loathed, a thing he had been avoiding for as long as he could remember, and even when violence seemed like the easier solution, he always tried to find another one.

There were still some nights filled with nightmares of the people he had been forced to kill, he couldn't escape the realization that he was in fact, a murderer.  
This thought never failed to keep him awake, too frightened to relive the monstruosity he had been a part of if he drifted into sleep.

Washing the soap away, he glared at his prothesis, and hated how grey and reflective it was, how inhuman it made his entire body look.  
He couldn't deny that he was glad to be able to walk, unlike a lot of bruised habitants of Panem that had to build some sort of wheelchair to stay mobile.  
But he still disliked this part of his appearance, and the lack of flesh at the end of his leg.

Slipping through a clean black tank top and a pair of new boxers, he limped towards the window to hang the piece of cloth to dry, and walked back to his bed.

The sheets were soft and smelled like a field of fresh grass sprinkled with a flowery hint to it.

He could still hear the sounds of cuttlery and muffled conversation coming from below as he fell asleep.

/ / /

_" Peeta, " _someone whispered awfully close to his hear. _" Come on, wake up. "_

He groaned, covering his head with his pillow, tempted by a lie in.

A sigh made him quirk an eye open, _" You have to wake up, " _the voice insisted, louder than before. _" Time to walk around in this quiet neighbourhood. "_

The blond yawned, stretching his arms above his head and hitting the headboard with a low sound that seemed to resonate through the walls.

He suddenly sat up, and settled his feet on the floor. Breathing heavily through his nose, he looked up, _" Katniss? "_  
She rolled her eyes, braiding her hair as she started to walk backwards, _" I'll be waiting for you downstairs, _" she told him before turning on her heels.

Peeta apparently hadn't been awake long enough to hear about the guards' turns.

He got in his uniform and saluted Pollux and Jackson when he ran into them in the staircase.

Katniss was sat at the table, eating a piece of bread, twirling a spoon in a cup of tea, _" You took your time, " _she gently said.  
Peeta took the chair next to hers, and accepted the breakfast the host offered him, _" Thank you. "_

The woman got back to washing the previous night's dishes, eventually glaring at the window in front of the sink, at the sun slowly lighting up the roofs of the deserted area where she lived.

_" How do you deal with living here? " _Katniss asked, retrieving the tea bag from the cup. _" I imagine it must be difficult to stay invisible. "_  
The dark-skinned woman turned around, her hands covered in soap, _" My husband and I used to live in District 11, _" her voice was hoarse and throaty, but steady, _" We lost our little angel four months ago, " _she stated, looking down at her apron.  
Katniss settled her bread down on the table, _" What happened? "_

There was a long moment of silence during which Peeta didn't dare chewing his mouthful of toast.

_" She had been sick her whole short life, she never stopped coughing and constantly had raging fevers," _she continued, wiping her fingers on a towel_. " Yet we still thought she could make it a bit longer, a couple years perhaps. But we couldn't afford any medicine. "_

Peeta swallowed, straightening up on his chair, making it creak under his weight.  
He had heard so many stories like that when he worked in the bakery. About these families in other Districts losing their children before they were even old enough to be picked for the Games.

_" I lost a part of me when she left us, and we are still mourning her loss today, " _she grabbed the counter behind her, her lips trembling spasmodically. _" But Daman and I refused to simply stay quiet about the Capitol's responsability in her death. "_

She let out a shaky breath, lifting her chin to look at the two ex-tributes, and Peeta could feel the pain in her brown eyes as if they had a mind of their own.

_" We have never been skilled at anything but helping people back in 11, so secondhand Boggs granted us a spot as shelter providers, " _she added, on the edge of tears._ " It's actually okay in here, we have food and a place to sleep in, _" her voice was higher with every syllable. _" And Daman and I both needed a purpose, something to keep our minds off the horror surrounding all of Panem. "_

Katniss got up, and Peeta followed her moves quietly. She grabbed the woman's hands and held hem tightly in hers.

_" Thank you for accepting us in your shelter, " _she gently said, rubbing circles on the woman's skin. _" I'm sorry for your daughter, and I will make Snow pay for what he did, I swear I will. "_

/ / /

**NDA : **  
I'm sorry for how late I am.  
And I know this one isn't especially long nor filled with action, but I'm drowning in essays to hand and notes to re-write for college and can't afford to spend too much time on this fiction.

Nonetheless, I am willing to update this story more frequently, but can't guarantee regularity in the rhythm of further publication.

Hope you enjoyed it, see you in the next chapter,  
Bisous.


End file.
